Scary Changes
by Vinetta-Venture
Summary: It's almost 7 years after BD Nessie is for the most part done growing and Jake has left everything behind to stay with his bestfriend/imprinted. This is the starting point when Jake's and Nessie's relationship changes from friends to something more...
1. Chapter 1

Jacob's POV

"Stupid piece of crap!" I grumbled as oil started leaking down onto my chin and neck. Quickly I grabbed my socket wrench to tighten the oil pan bolts. The oil had just stopped when I heard a tinkling laugh that brought a smile to my face even though I knew the reason for the laughter was at my expense.

I crawled out from under the car and there she was leaning against the doorway of my makeshift garage wearing a white sundress and matching sandals. The sun was just starting to set behind her making her skin sparkle lightly. "You know you'd think after seven years you would have learned how to avoid that from happening."

I pulled out an old rag out of my back pocket. "Well you see cars are like women, you need a mood ring for it even to be safe for it to be around them and their mood swings." I said grinning.

Renesmee face turned into a pout, though I think I saw the laughter sparkling in her eyes. "Oh if that's how you feel maybe I should just leave." She said turning away.

A little quicker than humanly possible I ran to her and took her hand. "No!" I said turning her back around to face me.

"Well I don't won't to put you in danger." She said trying to keep the smile off her face.

I shook my head. "Silly Nessie, only a human male could possibly be in danger of a girl's mood swings. So me being a werewolf and all makes me immune." I said smiling happily.

"Oh I see." She said, her face finally breaking into her beautiful smile of hers. As much as she looked like her parents her smile was completely her own. She had the hair of her mother, wavy curls flowing all the way down her back, a few shades lighter than her mother's. She also had Bella's button nose and small ears, but she had her Edward's big eyes and thin face. But her smile, nothing compared to it. It could light up the darkest night. "I'm glad to hear it." She said giving me a hug around my waist, her head resting on my chest. The now familiar feeling of being whole settled over as I hugged her back, it was just all too natural.

"So are you all packed?" Nessie asked pulling out of the hug to take my hand and pull me over to the car I had just been under.

I sat down on the hood next to her. "Oh yeah, Alice came by yesterday and kidnapped me, taking me to the mall and made me try on everything in my size. And when I complained she said something about how I had to come with her because she wouldn't know what would look good on me or not because she couldn't just look into the future and find out." I said shaking my head, it had been the worst six and a half hours of my life! Though I guess it was worth it. Besides she had threatened me that if I didn't go with her, I wouldn't be allowed to go with the Cullen's to Alaska, because I wouldn't fit in with the clothes I had and would make people suspicious about them if I was walking around in just shorts and a t-shirt. "But at least I didn't have to pack anything; after she made me do all that she threw out all my other clothes and put all the stuff she bought into suit cases."

"So there is a bright side?" Nessie asked with raised eyebrows.

I scoffed "Pfft, no it just happened not to be as dark as other parts of that very dark and gloomy day!"

Her laughter filled the air again, sweeter than the sound of bells.

Once she was done we sat there for a while, neither speaking, just sitting on my car listening to two birds whistling back and forth to one another. After a while Nessie laid back on hood and closed her eyes and I couldn't help but watch her. She had grown up so fast, not that I minded, not at all, I loved Nessie at whatever age she was at. I just couldn't believe she was already done growing. (If what Nahuel said was true) It had been almost seven years, (six years seven months and twelve days) yet it felt like she'd been here with me my entire life.

But maybe that was just it; maybe my life just didn't start 'till she got here.

* * *

Renesmee POV

I loved the warmth of the sun on my skin, though the sun would be setting behind the line of trees outside Jake's garage and I wouldn't be able to feel it. But that was ok, when I closed my eyes I couldn't tell the difference between the sun and Jake. I felt a small smile quirking at my lips at the thought of him. Sometimes I worried myself at how much I thought about him, but mom says that it's normal, that Jake is a huge part of my life, and as I get older he was just going to get more important. Though I don't know how he could, he was already the most important part of my life. But mom is pretty smart like that so she must know something that I don't.

Tomorrow we, the Cullen's, Jake, and I would all be moving to Juneau, Alaska. It would be so different from England, but I was so excited! Tanya's clan would only be a couple miles away from where we would be living, and that meant seeing Kate, Carmen, and Eleazar whenever I wanted! I had missed them so much in the last seven years.

But even though I was excited about moving somewhere new, I couldn't help but feel guilty. Jake had spent the last seven year away from his family, away from the pack, (though he did get to talk to them when he changed into his wolf form) and his home, all because of me. No matter how many times Jake said he was happy to be with me, I could tell he missed Billy and the pack. And that made me feel horrible. How could I do something like tear Jacob from his family! If I really cared for him I would tell him to go back home.

But I couldn't do that, I was too selfish, I wanted to be with Jake too much to let him go, because if he went back I couldn't go with him. There would be too many questions.

"What are you thinking about?" The sound of Jake's voice brought me out of my thoughts.

I opened my eyes. "I was just thinking about the move and getting to see Kate again." I said smiling; well it wasn't a lie exactly.

But Jake narrowed his eyes, looking down on me hard. "You know I think that was another thing you inherited from your mother."

My brow furrowed. "What?"

He chuckled. "Her ability to lie." He said smiling widely. "So what are you really thinking about?"

I pursed my lips folded my arms across my chest and I felt my face heat up a little, he was right, try as I might I could never lie, I even sounded fake to myself.

"Come on Nessie, you know you can tell me anything!" He said taking my hand with a pleading look in his eyes.

I quickly looked down trying to steel myself from the look that could get me to do anything. Because I didn't want to tell him. I didn't want to bring it up in case it made him realize that he wanted to go back home. I couldn't handle that. Jake was my best friend, (though that sometimes didn't seem to cover what we were sometimes) I couldn't do it if he left.

"Really Jake, that was it." I said silently begging him to drop it, because if he asked again I would probably give in. Luck much have been on my side, because Jake wasn't one to let someone lie to him and then let that person get away.

"Oh, ok." He said sounding slightly hurt.

Hearing his voice I couldn't help but look up at him, but he was looking down. "Jake please don't put a lot of thought into this. It's just something I want to think about a little more before I try to say it out loud." I said. When he still didn't look at me I took his hand. "Really, you'll be the first to know when I'm ready."

He nodded his head giving me a small smile. "Ok. And I get it. I just like knowing you'll tell me everything." He heaved a sigh. "Sorry I'm so moody today." He said giving his head a shake, his long brown hair going everywhere some tickling my face.

I laughed, and since I was holding his hand I used my ability to remind him of yesterday when he promised me that we would do something fun before we left tomorrow. The memory flowed through my head like I was watching a movie, and I knew he was seeing the same thing as me.

_'You promised.'_ I thought at him. I had just gotten that last year. I could now not just share my memories with the ones I touch but now I can also share my thoughts to! Grandpa thinks it has something to do me growing, like as I get older my powers get bigger. Or something like that.

"That's right." He said once I had finished. "I guess I owe you one more night out on the town." He said jumping off the front of the car, pulling me up along with him. "So what would you like to do?"

I shrugged as long as it was with Jacob, I couldn't really care what we did. "I don't know, you decide."

Jake grinned down at me. "I was hoping you would say that."

I stared up at him, he was really kind of beautiful.

"Renesmee!" I heard Alice's voice screech. I turned around, not all that surprised, I don't think Alice knew how to make a normal entrance.

"If she's come for me because she's remembered she forgot to get me some form of sweater yesterday I am going to hide behind you like a little girl." Jake whispered into my ear so low I wouldn't have been surprised if Alice hadn't heard it. But alas.

"I heard that Jacob. And no I'm not here for you, Renesmee I have to get you ready for tonight! Come, come child we have very little time!" She said bouncing over to me, taking my hand that Jake wasn't holding and started toward the car.

"But Alice I was making plans with Jake tonight." I whined dragging Jake along behind me.

"Yes silly, I know." She said laughing. "That's why we have to go get you dressed!" She said smiling over her shoulder.

I felt my forehead wrinkle. "But you can't see Jake's future, how do you know where we're going and what I'm going to be wearing?"

Again Alice laughed, I was beginning to think she was laughing at me. "Never underestimate the powers of a psychic!" She came to a stop next to her yellow Porsche and she rolled her eyes at me. "I can see some, it's just really fuzzy, and I saw what you are going to where tonight! Trust me you look great!" she squealed, took my hand from Jake's and pushed me to the passenger's side of the car. "You can come pick her up in an half hour." She told Jake after shoving me into the car and was walking at vampire speed to the driver's side. She slid in and had the car in drive before she remembered something rolled down the window and said. "Oh and Jacob, please be wearing a shirt as well as pants when you pick her up."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Renesmee POV

If it wasn't for the fact that I knew Jake would never leave me alone with Alice a second longer than necessary while she was in 'lets-make-up-Nessie' time I would have sworn I was in Alice's bathroom for over two hours. After curling all my hair, pulling the front sections and pinning them to the back while leaving the rest cascading down my back, she did my make-up. Though I was impressed by how little she used, it looked natural. She then made put on a red silk top with a sharp V neck, tight dark blue jeans and black heels. When she was done I looked into a floor length mirror, I looked, well, like a Cullen.

Alice and Rosalie always dressed like this when going to school, or out anywhere in public. But since I couldn't go out too often, (because I was always changing) I wasn't often dressed up like this. I mean sure Alice would buy me this stuff, but I was never the same size long enough for me to wear anything for long.

"So what do you think?" Alice asked coming up beside me. I was the second shortest person in the family; I was two inches shorter than mom and four inches taller than Alice.

"Um, I don't know. I think I look-?" I said not really sure what the word I was looking for was.

"Sexy?" Alice asked.

"Yeah maybe that's it. Man that's so weird." I said turning to look at my backside in the mirror.

"What is sweetie?"

"Sexy. I mean two years ago I was cute, and four years ago I was adorable. It's just weird that's all." I said with a shrug.

Alice laughed. "Well get used to it because this is how you're going to look forever!"

"Hey Nessie ready to go!" I heard Jake yell from down stairs.

"Coming!" I called back. I hugged Alice, gave her my thanks and headed down stairs wondering if Jake would like my outfit.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I waited in the living room with Bella, Edward, and Jasper. Everyone else had left yesterday for a hunting trip and wouldn't be back 'till later tonight.

I was wearing pair of jeans and white button up shirt. I couldn't even remember the last time I wore something more than shorts and a t-shirt, but I knew Nessie would like it; it would give something else to tease me about. It was odd, I knew as a guy that being teased by a girl should bother me, but when Nessie did it, smirking and giggling, I couldn't seem to make myself mind.

The sound of someone coming down the stairs made me stand up from the loveseat I had been sitting on. I waited at the bottom on the stairs for Nessie. But it was Alice that came down. As soon as she reached the bottom step Bella took Edward by the hand and lead him out of the house, Edward looking very confused.

As soon as they left Alice smiled at me and whispered. "Jacob tonight Renesmee is trying something new out, and she's kind of sensitive about it. So I need you to be careful about what you say about her outfit?"

I nodded slowly, kind of confused. "Oh and I took care of that thing you are going to ask me about!" She said happily.

She seemed to be getting better at seeing my future.

But then Nessie came into view and I felt my mouth open slightly and my eyes bulge. Wearing a red top with a V front, a rather _low_ front and rather tight jeans Nessie looked…I'm not even sure what the word is. But it was one that I didn't use on Nessie. I met her sparkling eyes as she reached the bottom step. She was almost my height this way.

"So what do you think?" She asked not looking away, but right in the eyes.

I shut my mouth before speaking and took a deep breath before speaking, I wasn't sure all what was going on but I didn't want to mess things up with Nessie so I wanted to make sure I got this right. "You look great." I said smiling.

She beamed back her smile lighting up her face.

I faked a cough and leaning closer to her and whispered. "Great; now can we go before Alice finds something wrong with what I'm wearing and we're here for another hour?" I said smirking, knowing Alice would hear me.

Nessie nodded her head and headed for the door. I'm not really sure when but sometime Alice had made her way to the couch where Jasper was, and was now sitting in his lap with a pouted look on her face, while Jasper just smirked at me.

I grinned waved and walked out the door with Nessie beside me.

* * *

Renesmee POV

As we walked out the front door I glanced again at Jake. He was wearing a white button up shirt, the top three buttons undone and nice long jeans. When was the last time I even saw him wear jeans that didn't have a rip at the knee? It's not like he dresses like a slob or anything, it's just he never goes anywhere, well he goes where I go, and that's nowhere.

He walked me to my side of the car and opened the door for me. "Jake you look really nice." I said before hopping into Jake's Rabbit.

He grinned. "Yeah? Glad you think so. Because it took me forever to find a decent shirt in all that stuff Alice bought me." He said shutting my door for me before jogging around the front to his door and sliding in.

"So where are we going?" I asked as we pulled out of the drive-way.

Jake shook his head. "Nope."

I raised an eyebrow. "You're not going to tell me?"

He shook his head yes.

"Not even a hint?" I asked jutting out my bottom lip.

"Nope."

I sighed in defeat. "Fine! Have it your way."

He grinned. "Thank you I will."

I felt a small smile form on my face at Jake's goofy grin. We rode the rest of ride in a comfortable silence. I didn't really pay attention to where we were heading, it didn't really matter, not that I wasn't curious, it just wasn't all that important. I was sure whatever we did tonight it was going to be great.

* * *

"Really?" I said looking at Jake standing next to me. We had just gotten out of the car at our first stop; the one Jake would tell me where we were going to. We were standing outside the movie theater!

He shrugged. "What's wrong with this?"

"Nothing." I said half laughing. "Just not what I was expecting. Shall we."

"Good, because if we don't hurry we're going to be late; and I've heard some pretty awesome things about this movie." He said taking my hand and pulling me into the building and past the ticket booth.

I was about to ask when Jake put his hand into his back pocket and pulled out two white slips. "I pre-ordered them."

Wow; was the only word that came to mind.

After getting our tickets ripped we went to our screen and sat three rows closer the screen from the middle row.

"So what are we watching?" I asked settling into my seat next to Jake.

He grinned "Mr. Fantastic Fox."

"What?"

"Mr. Fantastic Fox."

I shook my head. "I'm sorry I think I heard you wrong."

He laughed. "You didn't."

"Mr. Fan-" I broke off into laughter. "What the heck kind of name is that?"

"See you're already getting into it!" He said happily.

Right then the movie started.

* * *

Jake's POV

You think it would be impossible to smile so much that it would hurt if you were me, the guy that never didn't have a smile on his face. Yet as Nessie and I walked out of the theater mine did. The movie had been good, impressively so. But watching Nessie watch it was much more entertaining. To watch her face light up red from so much laughing. She was too cute not to watch.

"So where are we going now?" She asked climbing back into the car.

The first stop hadn't really been all that much, it was just something I saw when I was on the computer the other night and thought Nessie would get a kick out of. But now came the main event, I wasn't all that fond of what we were going to do, well just the wet part. (I think that has something to do with being part dog)

"If I wouldn't tell you what we were going to do when we came here, what makes you think I'll tell you where we are going next?"

Nessie sighed and leaned back into the seat. "You know this could get really annoying. We don't have too many more stops do we?"

I thought about telling her we only had one more, but then again, where was the fun in that? "Nope. No hints." I couldn't help but laugh at her irritated expression.

"You're really enjoying yourself over there aren't you?" She asked folding her arms over her chest.

I smiled and nodded. "Aren't you?" I asked slightly worried that she might actually be hurt by my laughing at her. My smile slipped at the thought.

But she was quick to say. "Yes!"

And my smile was back! But better yet so was hers.

"Jake I don't know what we are doing tonight, but thank you for a great night so far." She said unfolding her arms and taking my hand in her cold one, giving it a little squeeze.

"Yeah you think that now, but wait until we reach where we are going next, it's a long ride." I said speeding up at thinking just how far we were going. But I knew she would love it. And because of that it was worth it. I probably should have saved this for her birthday or something, but I knew we wouldn't be able to do it in Alaska. And I wasn't all that sure when we would be in a place to do it again. So I guess I was strewed for her birthday. Crap.

We rod in silence for a while before Nessie turned on the radio some oldies rock. She had really taken up Edward's music styles. She had even learned the piano. (She was better than Edward, in my opinion. Though she would deny it)

Finally, about an hour and a half later, I pulled down the dirt road drove for about three miles and parked.

Nessie raise one eyebrow at me. "Huh?"

I laughed at the babbled look on her face. "Oh come on. Don't you trust me?" I asked before hoping out of the car and opening her door for her.

She gave a hard look. "You know I did, but now I'm really starting to second guess my judgment." She said, but hopped out anyway.

I put a hand to my face. "Ow. You I think that hurt more than a real slap."

"You know we could always find out?" Nessie said sweetly folding her hands in front of her, her eyes sparkling brightly light laughter.

My lips pursed. "You've been spending for too much time with Emmett." I muttered. Nessie giggled and I walked to the back of my car and pulled out a bag from the back seat. Shutting the back door I grabbed my things out of the bag and handed it to Nessie, who was looking very intrigued.

She looked inside the bag and her face burned red. "Jacob Black!" Oops, that can't be good. "You went through my UNDERWEAR DRAWER**!" **She screeched.

Relief swept threw me, she was yelling at me for something I didn't do. Whew! I could handle this. "No! no," I said quickly grabbing her shoulders trying to get her to calm down enough to listen to what I was saying. "Alice did." I said loudly, not really sure if she was listening. But when I said Alice's name her face softened. "I knew you didn't want me to go through your things so I asked her to do it for me." Well not really asked, since she had 'seen' me asking before hand and got the stuff together before I could actually ask. Though I wasn't really sure why, I had packed her stuff before, like for camping trips and stuff. But ever since she started looking about 12 she demanded that I stop. And after that one time I slipped and forgot about it, man it sent shiver just thinking about Nessie being that cold to me. Let's just say I never forgot what she said again.

She took a deep breath. "Ok. Good." She looked into the bag again. "So why am I changing into a bathing suit?"

I shrugged. "Why shouldn't you? Why should you? Man you are nosy!"

"Fine! No more questions." She said walking toward the line of trees. "I'll just go change over here." She called over her shoulder before disappearing out of sight.

I was changed out of my jeans and into my black trunks in 1 ½ seconds, Nessie walked out of the woods in 4. She was wearing a large t-shirt over her bathing suit, the edge of the shirt reaching her thighs.

"So where to now?" Nessie asked tossing her clothes in the bag and throwing it into the back seat.

"Now we run."

* * *

Renesmee POV

I loved to run, to feel the wind rush past my face, and to feel it tangle in with all my hair as it whipped around behind me. And Jake was running next to me holding my hand, leading me to only he knew where! But it was fun; we zig-zagged through trees and bushes, dodging low branches and roots sticking out of the ground.

We ran for about ten minutes before I could see a break in the line of trees. Jake led us toward it. When we reached it the trees broke off and we were standing on an edge of a cliff facing the ocean.

Waves crashed into the wall of rock we were standing on far below.

"You're giving me diving lessons?" I asked completely confused.

Jake laughed. "No." He then proceeded to start walking backwards while counting his steps.

I couldn't help but laugh at how ridiculous he looked. "What do you think you are doing?" I asked following him back into the woods.

He held up a hand signaling me to wait, counted 5 more steps and stopped. "What did it look like I was doing?" He asked looking very proud of himself. "I thought it was painfully obvious. Now come stand next to me." He ordered. Shaking my head I did as I was told. Jake took my hand; his eyes gleaming he asked. "You ready?"

Not really sure I was or not I nodded my head. "Yep."

He grinned. "Ok so it's easy we just run as fast as we can to the edge of the cliff and jump as far out as we can. Got it?" He asked excited.

"Yeah, I think I got it." It wasn't that much to remember. I took off my shirt throwing it to the side, Jake did the same. I had seen him without a shirt on before; heck he hardly ever wore a shirt! But all of a sudden it seemed different. I shook my head and looked straight ahead.

"Ok on three. One. Two. THREE!" He said and we both broke off into a run; jumping a half a second later. And then we were flying! (well I've never flew before, but I'd bet this is what flying felt like)

It was so beautiful. The sun was almost set in front of us turning the sky all different shades of orange and red, the water reflected the sky. I looked over at Jake, who was still holding my hand and smiled at him. "This is so cool!" I yelled.

And then we were falling. "Dive!" Jake said four seconds before we hit the water.

Quickly I arranged my body right, just in time to enter the water smoothly. As soon as we entered the water Jake tugged on my hand and he pointed down; and we started to swim, vampire/werewolf speed of course, down. We swam about 10 feet when I was them.

Dolphins.

I gasped into the water, but it didn't matter, I didn't really need the air anyway. I looked at Jake, he was watching me closely, and then I looked back the dolphins. There had to be a thousand of them! They were all swimming around one another, some had babies following closely behind them, others looked like they would be having a baby following behind them soon.

I watched in awe for a minute before throwing my arms around Jake neck. He hugged me back for a second before pulling back and nodding his head at the beautiful creatures swimming a little below us; as if to say 'what are you waiting for?'

I looked at Jake in wonder, how on earth did I get so lucky? I mouthed 'thank you'; he shrugged grinning like a smug fool. I couldn't even roll my eyes at him; I just smiled brightly before swimming towards the dolphins.

One came up from behind nudging my back gently with its nose. I turned around and reached out and touched its smooth skin on the side of its body. It seemed to like that because it flipped over, showing me it's belly. I was rubbing its belly when I saw something brown go by. I looked up and saw Jake holding a dolphin by the top fin and the dolphin carrying him around.

Jake looked so natural down here. Then again he did anywhere outside. His hair was pulled back into a ponytail flowing behind him in the water. Something about his bronze skin and brown hair in the blue water and the dolphin and its light grey colors was so soothing and beautiful that if I had any breath in my lungs I would have lost it.

The dolphin I hadn't realized I had stopped rubbing turned right side up and was still, as if waiting for something. Not sure what else to do I grabbed hold of its top fin; this seemed to be right because as soon as I did it took off. It swam smoothly through the water not really seeming to have a pattern. I let it drag me through the water; and it eventually brought me next to Jake where I hopped off. I pointed up and we swam to the surface.

As soon as we broke through the surface I hugged Jake again. "HOLY CRAP!" I squealed.

Jake laughed, holding me close. "I'll take that as your way of saying you liked it."

I shook my head pulling back a little so I could look at him. "Like it doesn't even begin to describe it! How did you know!? How did you even know I liked dolphins?" I asked in a rush. I hadn't told anybody that, I thought it seemed kind of childish and since I was three I could block people, aka dad, no one knew about it.

He grinned knowingly. "Let's just say I know you better than anyone."

Right now I couldn't care that he was dodging the question, I was far too happy!

Still smiling Jake sighed. "I have to get you back." He said softly.

I pouted. "But why?"

"Now, now please don't do that. If it were up to me we would stay here all night, but I promised Bella I would get you home before 10:00. And we have a long ride home."

"Fine." I said still pouting a little. I let Jake pull me back to the cliff we had jumped off and we climbed up it, grabbed our shirts, and ran back to Jake's Rabbit.

We had been riding for about 10 minutes before I slid closer to Jake and leaned into his side, he put his arm around my shoulders. "Jake tonight was the best night of my life." I said yawning out the last word.

I heard and felt Jake chuckle. "I'm glad. Now go to sleep." He said softly.

I snuggled father into his side and let my surprising heavy eyelids shut. I could feel Jake's steady breathing, feel the rise and fall of his chest. I let that sound, the soothing sound of his breathing lull me to sleep.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I heard Nessie's breathing even out and become a steady rhythm, meaning she fell asleep. I smiled to myself and kissed the top of her head. Nessie had been right; tonight had been perfect. All of it.

Even with that odd moment under the water. When I saw Nessie wearing her black two piece bathing suit hair flowing around her, rubbing the side of the dolphin's face…I didn't even know what the word I was looking for when I saw her, a small smile on her face, I still didn't know what the word was, maybe beautiful, but that wasn't it, it needed to have more meaning than that. I had shaken it off at the time, but now I was wondered what that was, that feeling, it was so, so, different, new.

But I didn't, couldn't let it bother me now, I was too happy.

When I reach the house I parked the car and carried Nessie inside. I passed Carlisle and Esme in the living room as I headed for the stairs. I walked into Nessie's room, pushed back her purple comforter with my foot and laid her onto the bed. Gently I tucked her in. I gave her one last kiss on the forehead and headed out of the room.

I had just reached the door like a good boy but I stopped like a bad one. I looked back over my shoulder at Nessie's sleeping form.

'_It wouldn't hurt anybody…'_ I thought; a grin sliding into place on my face. As quietly as I could I walked back to Nessie's bed; I knelt down next to it and debated for about a second, if Nessie ever found out she would kill me, but the grin was still in place.

Man; why even fight myself if I knew what I was going to do in the end!

So I slid my hand into Nessie's.

Pictures filled my mind as I saw what Nessie dreamed.

She dreamed about what we did tonight, all of it. I felt a smile on my face.

But then one part kept playing over and over again. It was of me being pulled by one of the dolphins.

I felt my forehead crease. I wonder what was so special about that. I had learned a long time ago that if Nessie was dreaming about something she liked she'd tend to repeat that over and over.

I took my hand out of Nessie's and looked down at her. She had a smile on her face. Shrugging I got to my feet. Who was I to questioned what made her happy. Just as long as she was happy, so was I.

And she would stay happy, as long as she didn't know I watched part of her dreams every night before I went to bed.

_'And on that note'_ I thought as I walked out of the room.

* * *

**_Hey to anyone who opened this! I hoped you liked this chapter. This is my first Fanfiction, so please feel free to tell me if you think this story stinks or not. I want all opinions! Please Read/Review!_**


	3. Chapter 3 Blow Up

Chapter 3

Renesmee POV

I had now finished reading an entire Vogue magazine, and according to Alice and Rosalie now that I had I could form my own opinion about the magazine. "Yep, still don't see the point in it." I declared handing the thing back to a shocked Alice. Apparently Alice hadn't seen that my final decision.

"That's my girl." Mom said smiling proudly.

"I am so ashamed of you. Please could you please move down a couple seats or at least pretend not to know me!" Alice said turning her back on me.

I stuck my tong out at her.

"Here; this is much better reading." Mom said me a black leather covered book, with gold lettering spelling out 'The works of Jane Austen'.

I smiled lightly. "Thanks." I said taking it gratefully. And opening it up to my favorite story- Pride and Prejudice.

Jake snorted from where he was sitting in the seat next to me. "How many times can you read that and not get bored?" He asked looking baffled. "You know how it's going to end, so what's the point reading it again?"

I shrugged, I knew there wasn't really any point to trying to explain to him why I liked the story so much; again! But I really did wish he could understand. And we were sitting in the airport waiting to bored our plain, what else did I have to do? "I just think it's kind of nice when two people who you know are going to get together from the beginning of the book finally do. I mean especially when it's two like Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy." I said getting excited just talking about; though everyone was looking at me liked I'd grown a second head or something, except mom who was nodding in understanding. "They hated each other from the beginning, yet as they got to know each other they couldn't help but grow affection for the other. Anyway, I just think it's kind of nice that even they could fall in love with the last person they would ever expect to." Jake still looked rather baffled. "I just like believing that if you really belong with someone, in the end you'll end up with that person. Even if you don't know who that person is yet." Nope. Still looked baffled. "You know what; I give up!" I said throwing my hands up in the air in defeat. It was pointless! That had to be the hundredth time I had tried to explain the appeal of books. And it was going to be the last! I didn't think it was that hard a thing to grasp, but when I started talking about book everyone just started to look so confused.

I huffed and crossed my arms over my chest, not looking at Jake 'cause I knew he was smirking. He loved it when I gave up. "Oh come on don't be upset. We all still love you, even if your thinking is a little off some times."

I glared at him sideways. "I used to think I wasn't explaining myself clearly, but now I don't think it's my fault at all, no I think it's just impossible to explain it to someone that the closest thing they've read to a book is a comic strip." I grumbled.

Rosalie did a low whistle and Emmett who was sitting on the other side of me chuckled. Jake didn't look too bothered by the comment; he actually had a small smile of his face.

I couldn't stay mad for too long and after about four minutes I was leaning comfortably into Jake's side, his arm around my shoulder, as I read my book. It was another 15 minutes before they said we could board our plane. But when they did we filed into the line of people giving a lady in a dark blue pants suit our first class tickets and we followed her onto the plain where she than seated us. She asked us if we needed anything before she gave us lunch menus asking us to decide what we would like now and telling us someone would be by to pick them up in a few minutes and left.

I looked around me I had only been on an airplane once before when we went from Forks to England, and I didn't remember it that well considering I was a lot younger.

"Nervous?" Jake asked raising an eyebrow at my darting eyes.

I shook my head. "No, I'm just excited."

"About the plane?" He asked the surprise clear on his face. I nodded again and he chuckled. "You're so silly Nessie."

I shrugged and settled into my seat. A while later the pilot said we would be taking off and told us to put on our seat belts, as he did this a stewardess wearing a short dark blue skirt and a white button up blouse with a nametag announcing her as 'Kristy', came up and did it for me; then she did the same for Jake, only she was a little slower fastening it and when she did that she ask. "Who you like me to tighten it for you?" she asked using a funny voice. I felt a growl build up in my throat, she needed to leave; couldn't she see how uncomfortable she was making Jake feel.

Jake looked down at her hand where it hadn't left the buckle yet. "Um, no." He said looking _very_ uncomfortable. "I think I can get it myself." He said trying to smile politely, though I could tell he was struggling with it.

Slowly, she pulled her hand pack and smiled one last time before she went to help the next row.

"Well that was just plain, for the lack of a better word, ew." He said with a shiver.

I couldn't explain why I was so relieved to hear him say that; maybe it was because I didn't like her either. Yeah that sounded about right.

Not sure what to say I just nodded.

A minute later we took off and we were allowed to take off our seatbelts. I clicked mine off and pulled my legs under me so I was sitting more comfortably. I looked at Jake but he hadn't moved to take his off yet.

I raised an eyebrow.

"I'm afraid to move." He said as if reading my mind. "If I take it off will the lady try to buckle me back later?"

I did my best to stifle the giggle in my mouth. "Yeah but what if you don't unbuckle and then she tries to do to that for you?" He looked like he was really contemplating what to do now. "And then she's still going to try to buckle you in for the landing." At this he looked plain horrified, and he quickly took off the belt. I couldn't keep the laughter from escaping this time. He looked down at me slightly annoyed. "Yeah you wait 'till you have some girl looking at you like that and talking like they have something stuck up their nose. Then we'll see who is laughing."

"You're right, if a girl came up to me and did what she just did to me, that would be weird." I said still laughing.

Jake looked down at me amused.

Our stewardess came by then and leaned down and asked Jake. "Have you decided what would like for lunch?" I was going to hit her. Her once respectable uniform now made her look like a tramp! She had unbuttoned the top three buttons of her blouse and pinned the skirt up an inch! This is how women got their bad name! From sleazy, trashy, tramps like her!

It was going to be a long ride to Alaska.

* * *

Jacob's POV

"Have you decided what you would like for lunch?" It was her again. Ugh! And what had she done to herself! At least before she had looked presentable. Now with the top couple buttons of her shirt undone and I even think she somehow managed to get her skirt shorter; she looked like 5 bucks.

I heard Edward chuckled up and to the left of me. Probably reading her thoughts. I didn't see what was so funny _'Oh shut up.'_ I thought at him.

I quickly told her I wanted the chicken and rice plate with a Dr. Pepper so I could turn my attention to Nessie. But she was looking slightly irritated at the stewardess, and didn't realize I was trying to talk to her. "Nessie?" I touched the back of her hand and that seemed to wake her up. Though the stewardess didn't seem to like me touching her because the second I touched Nessie she started glaring at her. I thought about poking this human in the eyes, I always wanted to do that to someone, but instead I focused of Nessie.

"Huh?" She asked.

I chuckled. "What do you want for lunch?" I asked smiling.

"The same." She said more to me than the stewardess taking our order.

Though I saw her write it down out of the corner of my eye, I didn't dare look at her again for fear of permanent scarring, I kept my eyes on Nessie, it was safe there.

"Anything else I could get you?" She asked.

Still not looking up I shook my head no. "No that's it thanks."

"Ok," She said sounding a little confused, probably wondering why I wasn't looking at her. "well if you think of something, my name is Kristy." She said before finally walking away.

I let out a groan and leaned my head onto Nessie's shoulder. "Please shoot me now!" I begged.

Nessie laughed. Ah, ok never mind put the gun back. "Aw come on you know that wouldn't help any. If anything it was probably just tickle." She said a line wrinkling her forehead, meaning she was thinking about something. "What _would_ happened if you got shot?" She asked clearly curious.

I grinned. "Nothing. Back when I was with the pack we were running in the woods, you know just patrolling and whatever, and some hunter shot at a deer; missed and hit Paul as he was running by." I chuckled remembering. "He hadn't even realized that he'd been shot! We didn't know about it 'till he fazed back and the bullet fell to the ground."

Nessie seemed to find this amusing and laughed lightly.

We spent the next three hours talking about nonsense, Nessie would sometimes read her book, and when she did this I would listen to my I-Pod. Kristy came by a few more times, always talking to me and ignoring Nessie, though I couldn't feel bad for her, I mean she was getting the upper end of the stick. I was about ready to start shouting 'Hallelujah!' when the pilot said that we would be landing soon and we needed to buckle our seatbelts for the landing. Both Nessie and I buckled ourselves this time; and when Kristy got to our row she looked so disappointed. I shrugged and smiled happily as she walked by, Nessie looked equality happy.

"Is our stuff already there or is it coming later?" Nessie asked looking excited once we felt the plain hit earth. I smiled to myself, I knew how happy she was to finally be able to go out into the world without worrying about people seeing her, (with as much as her appearance changed per day it was a big issue) I knew she was excited about finally getting to go to a real school. I mean, we had all helped home school her all the way through college, but I knew she was more ready to start Juneau High. This was going to be her first time living through high school, mine too if you don't count my time in Forks, which all I did then was use my desk at school as a bed, and she wanted to get started.

"I'm pretty sure we're going to have to pick it up later." I said though I wasn't a hundred percent sure. I was starting to look around for Esme among the people who were starting to gather their stuff, if anyone knew she would.

"Oh do you need help with that?" I heard Kristy's high pitched voice ask. I froze horrified; I had forgotten to undo my seatbelt!

"No, no, no, I can do it!" I was starting to say but Kristy's hand was already at my waist. I wanted to reach down and snap her wrist off! I didn't move, afraid I'd do just that, when I heard a low growl from next to me.

Both Kristy and I turned to stare at Nessie as she took hold of Kristy's wrist and hissed. "He said no." And she threw Kristy's hand away from me. Looking terrified Kristy quickly nodded, turned and fled down the aisle and out of sight.

I continued to stare, never had I seen Nessie look so, so, scary!

She caught me staring and I was about the ask her where that came from, but she cut me off still sounding angry "You know Jake you should really learn how to stand up for yourself; because I'm not always going to be there to do it for you. If someone is doing something you don't like say _something!_ JEEZ! What are you a werewolf or a kitty anyway!" She said before standing up and stalking toward the door of the plane where I saw Jasper and Edward waiting for us, Jasper with a thoughtful look on his face and Edward looking horrified.


	4. Chapter 4 A New Beginnings

Chapter 4

Renesmee POV

I don't know what's come over me! I was just so _mad_ I couldn't think straight! That stupid woman, _Kristy,_ what kind of name was that anyway! I bet she is a hooker on the weekends! AGH! She was so disgusting; talking to Jake like that didn't she even notice how awkward it was for him?

And JAKE! What was his problem? He couldn't even tell the stupid human to leave him alone! I mean if he could tell Alice, a vampire to, and I quote: "Bite me." What was wrong with telling some silly human to buzz off?

I breathed a sigh and actually looked out at the winter wonderland passing by my window in the rental car I was sitting in. We had been driving for about ten minutes and I hadn't even looked around me since I stomped off the plane. I had just stormed after mom and hopped into the car she said me, her, dad, and _him_ would be taking. But I looked now, we were passing through the main part of town, I could see a general store and a hospital, a candy shop, and a few other small shops. All of this was covered in snow, of course. We drove out of town and kept going; our new house would be about ten miles away from anything.

I breathed in a deep breath, I really shouldn't be mad. I wasn't even sure why the stewardess bothered me so much, I mean I had seen others do the same kind of things to dad, Jasper, and Emmitt and grandpa. But maybe that had something to do with it. All of them had wives to beat off the humans who thought themselves so amazing that they could steal the men away from their women.

But Jake didn't have a woman, he just had me; his best friend. So maybe the job that his wife was supposed to have fell to me, since he didn't have one.

Then a horrifying thought came to my mind, Jake didn't have a wife, or a mate, or anything like that; that meant he could be looking, and he could have liked what that stewardess was doing?! I felt sick at the thought.

That might have been why Jake hadn't stopped her from undoing his seatbelt. Maybe he was doing that thing, 'playing hard to get' or something. If this was the case, I really couldn't get mad. If that's what he wants, who am I to question his happiness?

But still, the thought of that stewardess made my blood run hot.

* * *

We pulled up to the house, like the all Cullen house's it was huge. It didn't even look like a house, more like a castle. It was three stories tall and was made of light grey stone.

"Wow, Esme! You really out did yourself this time." Rosalie said hopping out of the car the rest of the family took.

"Yeah, just wait 'till you see the inside!" Alice said clapping her hands together. "It's perfect!" And Alice led the way into the house.

She was right, now I was sure it was a castle! The floors were a beautiful wood and the walls were white, and once you got into the living room there was an amazing stair case leading up to the upper levels of the house.

"Holy crow." I said in awe as I turned about trying to take the place in; and though there wasn't much furniture yet the house was amazing!

"Do you want to see your room?" Alice asked taking my hand and pulling me up the stairs before I could answer her. She dragged me all the way to the top floor; we were in some other living room. She quickly pulled me through the large room and into a hallway leading off into two different directions. "This one is yours!" She said opening the door at the end of the hall.

I walked in and gasped. I could see everything! Three of my four walls were made of glass, as was my ceiling! (The only wall not made of glass was the one with my door) I could see for miles! From this view I could really see how beautiful the snow was. I looked around in wonder, this was incredible. I launched myself at Alice's neck. "Thank you!" I squealed.

She laughed, hugging me back. "Don't thank me, it was all Esme's idea!" she told me.

I quickly let go of Alice and ran down the stairs as fast as I could calling for grandma the entire way. I found her in the living room on the first floor talking with grandpa. As soon as I entered the room grandma got to her feet, expecting my hug, which I gave her.

"Grandma it's AMAZING! Thank you so much!" I said in a rush. I couldn't wait to show Jake.

"I'm so happy you like it." Grandma said looking down at me. "I promise it'll be completely done as soon as the furniture arrives later tonight."

I couldn't keep the smile off my face. I kissed grandma once on the cheek and went looking for Jake.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I sat down on the dark carpet in my new room. Nessie hadn't even looked at me the entire ride here. I could tell she was still angry at me when we got here, and I didn't want to make things worse so I didn't try to talk to her.

I wasn't even all that sure why she was mad. Had I said something? Done something? I couldn't think of anything. And I was really good about knowing when I did something stupid. But right now I was coming up with blank.

I was pretty sure she didn't like that stewardess lady from the plane, maybe that had something to do with it. But what I had no idea! How was I supposed to make things better if I didn't know what went wrong in the first place?! I groaned and rubbed my face with my hands, I had been asking the same questions over and over since I got into the rental car the Edward, Bella, and Nessie; I was driving myself nuts! But I couldn't help it, I couldn't stand not being about to talk to Nessie.

I heard Nessie squeal in delight from somewhere.

I wondered what she was happy about. I heard her say thanks to Alice, but for what? Normally I would just go find out, barge in and ask what's all the noise about? But I didn't think Nessie wanted me to do that right now; so I was left with just trying to guess what the squealing was about.

Agh!

"Jake?" I heard Nessie's sweet voice call out from the door of my room a minute later. "Are you in there?"

I was up and opening the door in less than a second. I opened the door slowly, afraid I had just imagined her voice. But there she was, her face glowing and a big smile on her face. Suddenly I couldn't remember why I was so sad a moment ago. "What is it?" I asked. Was she still mad at me?

"I've got to show you something!" She said taking my hand and pulling me after her. She pulled me along the hallway and to the only other door. We walked in and I was met with white. The entire room was a giant window!

"Wow."

"I know!" Nessie said giggling, I smiled. "Isn't it amazing?!" She asked dropping my hand and moving to the middle of the room to spin around her arms stretched out.

I watched her do this, her hair twisting around after her. With the snow all around her, Nessie look like an angel. "Yeah." I said with a smile not taking my eyes off her. Nessie was truly amazing.

She stopped spinning and giggled again. She stared at me for a moment then sighed. Calmly Nessie walked to me and hugged me around my middle fiercely. I was confused, but hugged her back. Maybe I really should look into that moon ring idea….

"I'm sorry." She mumbled.

I looked down at the top of her head. "No I'm the one who should be saying that." I said knowing for certain that was true, I was just kind of confused about the why I was needing to apologize.

Nessie pulled back to look up into my face. "No I am, I shouldn't have gotten angry at you. I was just…was just…you know I just don't like seeing you so uncomfortable." She said in a rush, tripping over her words. "I mean that stewardess was all over you! And you, you didn't say anything, you didn't like what she was doing and you didn't say anything." She sighed heavily and looked down at her hands. "You didn't like what she was doing right?"

If it wasn't for the fact that I could feel how serious Nessie was right now I would have laughed at the absurdity of the thought! Was she really asking me this? Was there really any question in her mind?

"I mean because if you did then I have another reason to be sorry, and I-"

I had to cut her off before she went any father, and set the record straight. "Nessie everything that woman did and looked today was completely disgusting!" As soon as I said this Nessie's head shot up. "Did you really think that I could like her?" I asked, surely she knew me better than that.

Nessie shrugged.

I sighed. How could she possibly think that? "How could you think I would want someone like that when I have everything I need right here?" I asked looking into her eyes. "What more could I possible need than my best friend?"

Nessie beamed up at me and I smiled as she launched herself at my neck.

If all this could have been stopped by me being impolite to some woman; I was never going to be nice to another female again!

"So are we ok now?" I asked setting Nessie back onto the ground. She really was short.

She nodded. "Yep!" She said smiling big.

I laughed. "Jeez, so even if werewolves are immune to girls mood swings; that was far too tiring." I said grinning down at Nessie. She just rolled her eyes and laughed.

"Yeah and you better get used to them!" Alice said from the doorway. I jumped slightly and turned around. "Come on, Jasper and Emmett went to go get the truck with all our stuff in it, they'll be back in two minutes and 6 seconds." She said before bounding down the hall and out of sight.

I took Nessie's hand and followed. "This place is so big!" Nessie whispered on the second floor.

I nodded. "Yeah, if it was for the fact that your room was a huge window, it would almost look like all those princess movies you used to make me watch."

Nessie giggled and jabbed me in the side with her elbow. "Oh come on you know the reason we watched those was because you liked them."

"Sure, sure." Whatever she said, as long as she was smiling it didn't really matter.

By the time we got down stairs the truck was just pulling into the driveway. Two minutes later, and everything was piled up around the room from Jasper's and Emmett's crazy unpacking.

"Wow, sure don't waist anytime." I muttered now wondering why we were down here at all, they obviously did need any help.

I looked around me, it didn't look much like a home, more like a storage been, but give Esme one day with it and it would look like art.

But would it feel like home? I mean a place to be completely free and not have to worry?

Just then Emmitt walked through the front door carrying a Plasma TV. A grin broke across my face; ok maybe this could work after all….

* * *

**Hey everyone! Sorry it took me so long to update! I wasn't home all day and then when I finally did get home I couldn't get to the computer 'till way after 1:00am! It is now 5:59am and I have to get up in 1 and 1/2 hours to go out of town for the week. So sorry but I'm probably not going to be able to update again this week! I'm sorry I wish I could but, I'll at least try to get a couple chapters ready for you guys when I get back. Ok! Well hope you enjoy this chapter! See you guys in a week! PLEASE REVIEW!**


	5. Chapter 5 Settled In

Chapter 5 – Settled In

Renesmee POV

It had hardly been three hours after Emmitt and Jasper brought all our stuff to our new house, but already the place looked like home.

Mine and Jake's rooms were the first done since we would be the ones actually needing them since we slept.

And I must say, even if Alice is crazy, she could decorate a room like no other. Well besides Esme of course.

My room was perfect; my large round bed was in the middle of the room with purple covers and throw pillows leaning against the white head board; a white bed side table beside the bed. I had a dresser and a vanity on one glass wall, my walk-in closet with a light wooden changing screen a foot in front of it, next to my door; my white carpet was covered partly by a light purple rug. Like I said it was perfect!

The rest of the house was coming together nicely as well. It was really looking like a Cullen work-of-art, the living room was covered with some really nice looking furniture, cream color couch and matching overstuffed chair, (for Emmitt when he plays video games on the Plasma TV) and loveseat. There were also a fireplace on each floor, and in ever bedroom. (except mine, but that was the only down side)

I think the only room not finished yet was the kitchen and the game room. (Emmitt and Jasper were going to have to have a lot more stuff ordered before that was to their liking)

I was unpacking my _eight_ suit cases when a thought accrued to me. I would be starting high school in two days. Real high school! In two days!

But then another thought, I have really have no idea what high school is like. I'd never been. I had always wanted to go, just because that's where everyone else went during the day, well besides Jake he had always stayed with me. But I didn't know what to expect.

I started to rush my way through the last two cases, I needed to talk to mom and dad. I could already feel the butterflies start to flutter in the pit of my stomach.

When I had put the last of my clothes into my closet I placed my luggage in the hallway; Alice would come get it later and put it where ever she hid them 'till we needed them again. (well actually she would probably send Jasper to do it, but it would be Alice's order) Once I did that I went down to the second floor, besides Jake, and me all the 'kids' would be sleeping on this floor. Grandpa and grandma had a master bedroom on the bottom floor. The stairs led into the living room where a couple nice brown couches and chairs had been set around the fireplace and TV, then had a hallway at both ends of the room. One hallway led to Alice's, Japer's and Rosalie, Emmitt's rooms; and the other led to mom's and dad's and the soon-to-be game room. I walked along the cream colored carpet to mom and dad's room. I knocked on their closed door and entered when they said I could.

"Hey angel, what are you doing?" Dad asked sitting next to mom on a window seat.

Their room looked like them, golden carpet with a matching lighter color for the walls. One wall was completely covered in dad's CD collation and _sweet_ stereo system, while another was covered in mom's book collation.

The only other piece of furniture in there was a big golden bed.

"Um, nothing really, I just finished unpacking." I said coming over to them and sitting down at there feet, laying my head in mom's lap. She gently combed her fingers through my hair. "And it kind of hit me suddenly; I have no idea what I'm going to be walking into on Monday. Could you tell me about high school?" I asked quietly.

Dad laughed a little. "Usually I would say repetitive, but I'm guessing that wouldn't help you much. Hmm," He thought for a minute before mom cut in.

"It's going to be easy." She said as gently as she was combing my hair. I really did love when she did that. It is just so soothing. "You are so smart and bright; the only thing you are going to have to worry about is boys." She said chuckling at dad's sour expression. "But don't worry too much about that, I think your dad will scare off any boy who thinks in your direction."

I giggled. "I don't think that's going to be a problem." I muttered. I knew the boys would be far too busy staring at mom, Alice and Rosalie to even notice me. Not that I minded being plainer, in fact it never bothered me. It was just the way things were, probably because I was half human.

Dad snorted. "As much as I would love for you to be right on this subject, I have seen far too many boy minds to hope for them not to notice you; you are far to beautiful not to attract attention to yourself." He said brushing the back of his hand down my face.

I smiled up at him. "Thanks dad, thanks mom." I said as the butterflies' disappeared. It didn't even matter what they said, just mom and dad's presence was so reassuring; they helped me not second guess myself. I sat there with them for another hour or so, it didn't really matter, but after some time a yawn popped out of my mouth.

"You should really head to bed now dearest." Mom said her hand going through my hair on last time. "It's very late."

I nodded and got to my feet. I hugged both of them saying goodnight and headed out of the room and up the stairs.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I would rather face ten new born vampires single handedly then go through what I just did again. Unpack all _seven_ of my suitcases! I was going to kill Alice when I saw her next. I had more clothes now than I had throughout my entire life combined! She had to be insane before she was changed. I mean being changed is supposed to make you think clearly and judge things better; so if you start out mentally challenged, then you get changed, I guess you get Alice!

I would have thrown my suitcases into the hall, where Alice told everyone to put them when they were done, but I didn't want to break anything of Esme's. She wouldn't be too happy if I threw a suitcase through a wall.

Though I did make sure they were in a big heap outside my door, take that Alice! (man I was so pathetic!)

Once I was done I closed my door on the shrewd pile of cases and looked around my room. Esme had down an great job. I was going to have to get her something good this year for her birthday.

The walls were a dark green color, on the wall across from my door was my _king_ size bed (YAHOO!) next to it was a dark wooden nightstand, and on the wall to my right was my dresser and across from that was my big desk. Above my desk was the only thing that hung on my wall, a tack board. On it were pitchers of everyone, though most of Nessie, one for each stage in her life. Esme's idea.

I looked at the board for a minute before, feeling like a 12 year old, I ran, and jumped, as high as I could, (without hitting the ceiling) onto my HUGE bed! I bounced a few times before settling into a nice position on my back, my hands behind my head; my feet not hanging off the end! I sighed in contentment, this was my first time in a bed that I could lay flat on and not hang off one end or the other. And I must say, it is _nice!_

I looked at the clock on my nightstand, 10:47 p.m. Hm, it felt later; probably from all the unpacking.

I closed my eyes, willing the light to go off with out me having to get up, when someone, the sound of a fluttering heart beat telling me who, knocked on the door.

"Come in." I said sitting up.

Nessie walked in and looked around. She hadn't seen it done yet. "I like it." She said smiling.

"Good, because I like it too." Though now that I knew she liked it I probably would have told her that even if I thought it was hideous.

She came and slid onto the bed next to me, laying her hand level with mine. "It looks like you." She said taking another look around the room.

"Yeah." I said laughing to myself, we thought so much alike.

We sat in silence for a while before Nessie's eyelids started drooping. Chuckling I got up, faster than Nessie could react, and scooped her up into my arms.

She groaned. "What are you doing?" She asked sleepily.

"I'm putting you to bed." I whispered as I made my way to Nessie's room.

"But your bed is so comfy." She complained still not opening her eyes.

"So is yours. I promise." I said laying her down on the purple sheets. "See?"

She snuggled into the covers as I tucked her in. But she shook her head. "Yours is still more comfy."

I chuckled. "I'll tell you what, you can come join me anytime you want ok." I said before kissing her forehead lightly. She nodded before her heart evened out, letting me know she was asleep.

I smiled down at her. So beautiful. I knew she thought she didn't look nearly as pretty as Bella and the rest of them, but personally, I thought she just blew them away. She was perfect in everyway. I couldn't help but think about all the attention she was going to get from the boys at school. I didn't like even thinking about that. I wasn't sure what I was going to do when I had to actually be in the same room watching the guys drool over her. Though I knew she could hold her own, I was happy to know I would be in most of her classes, and the ones I wasn't in she was going to be with Bella and sometime Bella and Edward.

Grinning I kneeled down next to Nessie's bed and carefully, though I was sure I wouldn't wake her, slid my hand into hers. Imminently images started playing in my mind's eye. Scenes of the new house, of her new room with her reading some book on the bed. A little later she dreamed about visiting with Kate and everyone else. I knew she was slightly disappointed in the fact that we wouldn't be able to see them any time soon, they had just left on a two week hunting trip. She even dreamed a little more about the other night, when I took her to see the dolphins. I was happy that she still dreamed about that, that meant she had a good time.

But again when she dreamed of that night that picture of me popped up again and again. She dreamed of school and imaginary people she would get to talk to and after a while I knew I had seen all the really random stuff. After the first ten minutes or so, Nessie would settle into one dream, but I only watched the first little bit, just to enjoy the randomness of it.

Gently I slid my hand out of Nessie's, the last image I was of her and I sitting in a place I had never seen before talking. Getting up I kissed Nessie on the forehead once more and then made my way back to my room for the night.

* * *

I never thought I'd be living with vampire, not in my craziest nightmare, but here I was knowing this was right where I wanted to be; sitting next to Nessie on the couch in the living room on the second floor, her tinkling laughter filling the air around me, Jasper on my other side and Emmitt on the other side of him….and a Plasma TV with a X-Box 360 in front of us!

So have I mentioned that vampires are totally wicked when it comes to video games. I thought I was good, but these guys were freaking awesome! (though it may have to do with the fact that while I was patrolling around Forks they were sitting in there house memorizing every combo in the 360's world)

To say the least, I lost every time I played.

But I didn't mind, I was having fun. Something about being with Jasper made you laugh when you blew up because someone had snuck up from behind and set a sticky grenade on the back of your head. Nessie found us blowing each other up very amusing. She didn't play much herself but she watched.

After about the hundredth time dying I decided to get my self esteem a rest.

"Are you hungry?" Nessie asked.

"Nessie, when have you ever known me not to be hungry?" I asked standing to my feet and pulling Nessie up with me by the wrist.

"What do you want?" She asked as we made it into the kitchen, that had finally been finished some time last night after I had gone to bed.

"You know I feel really bad;" I said taking a seat on one of the six stools in the kitchen around the counter in the middle of the room. Nessie looked at me confused. "I mean you making almost all the meals and stuff. Shouldn't I cook some too, since I'm the only other one who eats it?"

Nessie giggled a little. "Jake it's not that big a deal, I mean you cooked for me 'till I was old enough to do it myself, so I feel like we're pretty balanced." She said grabbing a pan from one of the bottom cupboards. "So what do you want?"

"Just what ever you're having." We ate almost the exacted same things, so I knew I would be ok saying that.

I watched as Nessie practically danced around the large kitchen. Grabbing this and that, moving to her own music. She even managed to keep moving while she was cooking the eggs, throwing little bits of spices in. I watch with an awe respect. She was so amazing, why she even put up with me was so far beyond me. I was too lucky to have her in my life.

"Here you go." Nessie's voice brought me out of my admiring thoughts, I seemed to be having more and more of those lately. She set in front of me a plate piled with eggs, bacon, and toast. And there was a second plate full next to that. A grin broke across my face. She knew me so well.

Nessie sat down with her own plate next to me and I began to stuff my face. I really should have felt more guilty, but I couldn't. Nessie's cooking was just so much better than mine!

I had just started on my second plate when Edward and Bella came into the room hand in hand. Edward left Bella in the doorway and made his way to Nessie. He kissed her on the forehead and asked. "Are you willing to spend an hour of your precious day with your old man?"

Nessie grinned. "Oh come on, you're only 17, that's not _that_ old. You are much too hard on yourself. And yes I would love to spend some time with you."

Edward's face lighten brightly, I couldn't blame him, and he kissed Nessie again. "Then as soon as your done eating meet me in the living room." He said and retook Bella's hand and headed out of the kitchen.

Once we had finished eating Nessie ran out of the kitchen and into the living room where Edward and Bella were sitting on the couch whispering so low to each other that I couldn't even hear it. Though as soon as we walked into the room Edward stood and took Nessie's hand. "How do you feel about a little piano playing angel?" He asked, a hopeful expression on his face.

Nessie smiled widely and nodded.

Edward then pulled her off to the other side of the room where Esme had decided to put the large black piano. A few minutes later a hauntingly sweet tune hit the air. I listened to it for a few minutes before I heard someone calling my name.

"Jacob, can you come here for a minute?" I turned around, Bella was still sitting in the same spot where Edward left her.

I smiled. "Sure." I settled into the couch beside her.

Bella and I hadn't been able to talk that over the last month, and even though my love had for her had changed, after Nessie was born, I still loved her like a sister and I had missed talking to her. "What's up?"

Bella smiled. "Does something have to be?" She asked. "I just wanted to know how you were. Even though we live in the same house, I feel like we barely see each other."

I laughed a little. "You know some times I think you're the mind reader, not Edward."

Bella laughed softly, I could hear the faint sound of Nessie's in it; though Bella's lacked the bell quality of her daughters.

"I'm good, I mean nothings really changed." I said.

Bella gave me a knowing look. "Really?" She asked, like there was hidden meaning behind the word. "Nothings changed? Not even a little?"

I tried to think of what she might be talking about. But I came up blank. "Nope, I mean I still suck at Call of Duty 4 and I hate my own cooking; nothings really changed." My eyes narrowed. "Why?" I really think Bella had something in mind when she asked, but now her face was all innocent. Stupid vampire abilities, couldn't tell when she was lying anymore!

"Nothing, it just surprised me that nothing has changed." She said her eyes telling me, at least I think they were telling me, that she was being honest.

"Ok." I sighed. "What about you?"

Bella shrugged, though a small smile was on her lips. "I some times still can't believe it, you know, this life." She said looking around her before her eyes landed on her husband and daughter at the piano. "I some times still think I'm going to wake up from this dream we're in. I mean being this happy can't be real, right?" She asked still smiling.

I shrugged. "Aren't vampires and werewolves supposed to be mythical things to scar little kids into never going outside when it's dark? Really, what isn't real?"

"You know Jake, I think you might just have the right idea." Bella said brushing some hair behind her shoulder.

We stayed silent for the rest of Nessie's and Edward's playing time, just listening to the music. When they were done Nessie hugged Edward around the neck and skipped over to where Bella and I were sitting a big smile lighting up her face.

"That was beautiful." Bella said as Nessie sat down in her lap.

Nessie blushed lightly. "Thanks." She murmured laying her head onto Bella's shoulder.

Bella and I shared a smile. "So want to watch a movie?" I asked hopping off the couch and to our DVD collection and Edward came and sat down next to Bella. Nessie nodded. In the end she picked Pride and Prejudice, the remake.

After we watched that, Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmitt, Carlisle and Esme came down and joined us as we spent the rest of the night watching movies.

It was a great night; and I could tell Nessie loved it. She laughed and cried, from laughing so hard. Emmitt even convinced Nessie into agreeing to watch some scary movie he had said was amazing. By the end of the movie both Edward and I were giving Emmitt death glares. There had even been a scene where you saw a guy get his head chopped off! But I couldn't kill him, I was too busy holding Nessie telling her it was all going to be ok.

After Edward got back from chasing Emmitt to, he wouldn't even tell us how far he chased him, we started some chick-flick that Alice and Rosalie liked. About half way through Emmitt walked back in and sat down quietly next to Rose, who pretended he wasn't there.

Yep the night was pretty much perfect.

* * *

**Hello again! Sorry for the wait. I'm still out of town, but I found time to make this chapter, and the next! So I hope you enjoy because I don't know when I'll be able to update again. Please review!**


	6. Chapter 6 This is School?

Chapter 6 – This is School?

Jacob's POV

I was so nervous. Today was the first day of school. And for the first time in a long time I was wearing long light blue jeans, a black sweater, a big black coat, and snow boots. I looked down at myself and grimaced. I hated clothes.

But that wasn't why I was uneasy, I had seen a glimpse Nessie earlier, she had looked really amazing, but it was obvious that Alice dressed her. And I was afraid of what would happen when we walked into the school and all the boys saw her. Trying not to think about it I walked down to the second floor and waited for the girls with the rest of the guys. They were all sitting around, not doing much of anything, except Edward, he was pacing back and forth behind the couch where Jasper and Emmitt were watching him with amused expressions.

I sat down next to Jasper. "What's up with him?"

"He's really nervous about Nessie's first day of school." He said with a smirk.

"And you're not?"

He shrugged. "Naw, it's not like I don't know what's going to happen."

Oh, "What did Alice see?" maybe she saw no one noticing her. Though I don't see how anyone could miss her.

"Oh I have no idea. But it's the same every year. We show up in some small town, people stare, flirt, and have dirty thoughts and feelings towards us." He said casually.

This did not help me settle down. I probably would have joined Edward if the girls didn't come down the stairs at the moment.

They filed down one at a time, Alice and Rose looking very happy with themselves, while Bella and Nessie looked liked they were in pain.

When Nessie walked down the stairs I stared in awe and horror. She was wearing tight brown pants the ends going into her brown heeled boots, a white turtle neck sweater that hugged her body showing off every curve, on her head she had a white hat and over her arm she had a Parka.

The room was silent, no one really sure of what to do. But to every ones surprise, Edward walked up to Nessie. "You look beautiful." He said kissing her forehead. "Maybe a little too old for my liking, but I guess I'm going to have to get used to that." He said and walked back to Bella who was beaming proudly at him.

Alice, who I could see out of the corner of my eye, was bouncing in place while Jasper tried to hold her still, burst out. "Ok, now that we've all had are staring at Renesmee time, can we please go!" She said far too excited for my liking. When Alice got this excited it usually meant something bad was going to happen.

"Yeah let's go." Edward said in a defeated tone.

Bella smiled up at him, tugging him toward the stairs. "Come love, it's going to be fine. You'll see."

Everyone followed suit, and soon the only people left in the room was Nessie and me.

"So," Nessie said looking up at me, then doing a little twirl "what do you think?"

I took in a deep breath. It was going to take all I had in me not to tell her to go straight up stairs and change right now. But I knew she was excited, and I didn't want to burst her bubble. So I walked over took her hand and kissed it. "You look fantastic." I said slowly, making sure the words didn't change as they made there way from my brain and out my mouth.

Nessie's eyes began to dance and she hugged me tightly. "Thank you." She said and pulled back. "Come on, we've got to go or we'll be late for school!" She said happily.

I sighed, this could be very bad.

* * *

Renesmee POV

I was so excited! I was sitting next to Jake in dad's new silver Volvo on my way to Junea High! I kept telling myself to calm down, I was probably driving Jasper crazy, I mean it was just school and everyone hated it; but I couldn't help it! I had barely been outside at all during my life, unless it was in the woods or some place where no humans were. I had asked mom if it was weird for me to be so excited over something so small, and she said yes. So everything was ok.

The ride was only 12 minutes and 46 seconds, but it felt longer. I wasn't sure why Jake was in such a funny mood, but when I asked him he just said that he didn't like school. Though I don't think that's what's really bothering him, but I didn't press it.

We hopped out of dad's car, Rosalie's car parked right beside ours and went inside a brick building, dad in the lead.

We walked into the warm building, there was a big lady sitting at a large wooden desk doing something on a computer. Dad walked right up to her and cleared his throat. The lady, 'Miss Cooper' by her nametag glanced up and stared, and stared, and kept on staring with glazed eyes.

"Excuse me, my name is Edward Cullen. And we're all new here." Dad said in a rather irritated voice. I hid my smile on Jake's arm that I was holding.

Miss Cooper blinked twice and shook her head slightly. "Um…" Was all she got out.

I heard dad sigh but knew that Miss Cooper didn't. "My name is Edward Cullen, we're new students." He said again politely.

The woman blinked again. "Oh yes! The new doctor's kids! Yes, yes, I'm sorry, I have your things right here." She said fumbling with some folders on her desk.

Finally after she dropped two folders, Miss Cooper handed us our things and we quickly left, declining from Miss Cooper's offer to show us where we were going on the school map she had given us.

"I'll never again be the one to speak when we sign in." Edward said once the door had shut behind us. "Next school Jasper can do it."

I couldn't help but laugh, I knew that woman had probably had some sort of dirty thought about dad. Ew, some old lady thought dad was hot! Gross!

"Hey let me see your class sheet." Jake said. I handed it to him and he looked back and forth between mine and his. "Hmm." He said and pursed his lips.

"What?"

"I may have a talk with that lady back there, or make Jasper do it, he's really good at getting what he wants, but we only have two classes together." He said handing me back my sheet.

"Really?" Man that stinks. "Which classes?"

"History and Gym."

Dad who had already walked ahead, came back. "What's the problem?" He asked and I guess he read Jake's thoughts because he became upset. "What? Let me see. You're supposed to have all but one class together." He mumbled and took our sheets from us. When dad finished he looked up annoyed before stalking back into the building.

Jake and I shared a look, and I shrugged.

A few minutes later he came back out looking a little bit better. "Well I got it mostly sorted out." Dad said handing us two class sheets. "But we'll have to work with the old one 'till tomorrow." Dad looked down at me sadly. "Sorry, I tried but you're going to have to be on your own for two of your classes today. Is that ok?"

I nodded. "Sure, it's only one day. How bad could it be?"

* * *

I think I'm going to kill myself.

I had been looking forward to school, I thought it would be fun to learn new things and be around people. Boy was I wrong. My first class was Algebra and I would be with mom for that one. So once we walked into the school we all went our separate ways.

People stared openly at us, some in wonderment, some in confusion, but most were in awe. We made it to class with people stepping aside to let us pass. I couldn't believe how at ease mom was, her head held high and her strides strong. Once inside the classroom we took seats in the back. I set my bag down and slid into the seat. Nobody dared to come up to talk to us, but everybody stared.

I fidgeted in my seat. I looked over at mom who was sitting casually in her seat staring blankly at the wall at the front of the class. "How can you be so calm with everyone staring?" I finally had to ask.

Mom laughed. "I'm not." She said so quietly I knew I was the only one who could hear her. "The secret is to pretend not to be effected by them. Because if you pretend they don't exist long enough they will, after time ignore you. It's really easy after the first couple of months." She said with a shrug. "You just get used to all the gawking and glares, when the start to realize we don't want to hang out with them. And you'll just realize, none of this matters, they don't matter. Once you realize that, it's easy to almost forget that they are there." She said flipping some hair behind her shoulder. I saw one of the guys looking at her mouth dropped open.

I giggled and turned and tried staring at the wall like mom until class started.

Once we left Mr. Jason's class mom kissed me on the head and smiled down at me. Though I could see the concern on her face. "Don't worry you'll be fine. I love you." She said softly.

I nodded. "I love you too." I told her and turned to go to my next class.

I stopped once I turned the next corner when I realized I had no idea where I was going. I pulled out the small map out of my shoulder book bag and looked down at the small thing. I had Literature like Mrs. Kim next.

"Hey!" I looked up startled, and was met with a short brown haired boy with rimless glasses. "I'm Garret Malcom." He said brightly giving me his hand.

After a seconds hesitation I took it. "Renesmee Cullen." I said and looked down at our hands that were still clasped.

"Yeah, I knew you were one of the new kids. I just didn't know which." He said finally letting go of my hand. "What class do you have next?" He asked leaning against the wall next to us.

Not really sure what else to say I answered. "Literature with Mrs. Kim." Hoping that he would say something along the lines. 'Oh well that's nice, hope you like it here.' And then leave.

But he said. "Really? Me too!" He looked and sounded far too excited. "Do you want me to show you the way?"

I looked down at my map once more before I sighed, I really didn't have a good reason to say no to him. "Sure, that would great." I said smiling.

He beamed at me and we started down the hall together. "So how do you like Alaska?"

I shrugged. "It's cold." I said, though really it didn't bother me that much, I could feel the cold, but I didn't really freeze.

Garret laughed, I didn't think what I said was all that funny. "Yeah, Alaska is known for being cold." He led the way into a class room; it was almost identical to the last one.

I sat down in the middle of the room since the back seats were already taken, Garret sat down next to me.

"So I heard you moved from somewhere in Paris or something?"

I sighed to myself. "England."

"Wow, this must be a big change of pace." He said leaning towards me, his hot nasty breath blowing on my face. "So do you have like a boyfriend or something?"

I shrunk back a little. I was trying to think of a nice way to say he needed a Tic-Tac when I was saved by the teacher. I smiled and shrugged before facing the front of the class room to listen with rapt attention. Garret cried to get my attention a couple times through out the class, but I ignored him. And once the bell rang for lunch I was out of my seat, book in bag and out the door before he could get my name out.

I had to slow down once out of the class room though, because I didn't know where I was going. So again I pulled out my map and scanned it for the lunch hall.

"Hey!" I heard a voice say and I almost groaned as I turned around. What do you know he found me. I really should have walked farther away form Mrs. Kim's classroom before looking at the map. "Need help finding the lunch room?" He asked hopefully.

Thinking of the stupid map I nodded. Besides once I got to lunch everybody else would be there.

So I walked along side of Garret and listened to him tell me about his family and how they had lived here for the past 11 generations. His parents owned the best coffee shop in town, and Garret had an older brother, he was a senior.

By the time we reach the lunch hall I knew everything there was to know about Garret Malcom.

Once we got to the door I saw the rest of my family waiting for me, just inside the hall. I couldn't help my smile of relief when I saw them.

"Um, thanks Garret, but I have to go eat with my family now." I said and cut him off before he could protest. "But I'll see you around!"

I almost ran to where my family was standing waiting. Emmitt was snickering, dad was looking murderous and Jake, well wasn't looking much better. Only he was openly glaring at the boy.

"Jake!" I hissed. When he didn't respond I tugged on his arm, he looked down at me, his face softening.

"Yeah?"

"Would you stop glaring at him!" I said softly hoping no one else could hear us as we got into the lunch line.

"Who? You mean the kid who was undressing you with his eyes? No." Jake said shooting Garret another glare.

I quickly wrapped my arms around my chest. "No he wasn't!"

"Yes he was." Dad piped in, still looking like he would rip the boy's head off if mom wasn't holding his hand so tightly

Jake, who was almost fuming now, ignored dad. "You're right he hasn't stopped yet."

I peeked over my shoulder at where Garret was, and his gaze was sweeping up and down my body.

"Will you please stop. Please!" I begged. "I don't want to draw attention to myself! Jasper please, a little help?"

Jasper pouted. "But it was so much fun watching."

I glared at him. "If I find out you were doing something with their emotions I _swear_ I'll rip your arms off!"

Jasper chuckled, but apparently did as I asked because dad looked a little less angry and Jake's jaw unclenched.

We quickly made our way through the line and to an empty table in the far corner of the room.

"So how was your day so far?" Alice asked with a knowing smile.

I gave her a quick glare. "It's times like these that I wish vampires could die with a simple stake through the heart. It would make killing ones self much easier!" I huffed. Jake's warm hand rubbed up and down my back soothingly. I smiled thankfully at him. "It's just I was hoping you guys were wrong, you know, I was hoping high school would be fun and interesting. But you were right! High school sucks like raw eggs!"

Emmitt who looked like he would have turned blue if he could from holding his breath for so long burst out laughing. Everyone else chuckled lightly and I just rolled my eyes.

Once we had finished lunch Jake followed me into the hallway. "What are you doing?" I asked stopping next to a bathroom.

He shrugged his shoulders. "We have History next." He said grinning.

"Oh." I hadn't looked at my class sheet yet. "Do you know which way to go?"

He nodded. "I memorized the map in Biology."

"I'm sure the teacher liked that." I mumbled, knowing he would hear it.

He shrugged again. "I listened too."

We walked down the hallway in silence and more people stared. Jake seemed to take them the same way I was.

"So what about you?" I finally asked when we stepped into our class. It hadn't started yet, and people were sitting around talking to one another, though I was pretty sure the topic was us. They kept glancing up at us; even the teacher was eyeing Jacob! "I mean was your day as bad as mine?"

He led us to some empty seats near the back. "Kind of. The whole people staring at you is kind of creepy. I mean it's like their waiting for you to screw up so they can go tell somebody else."

I shook my head. "Yep, that's what I thought too. But mom is all cool about it. She says she just ignores them, that some times she even forgets that they're there."

Jake snorted. "You know I never would have picked your mom to grow out of her shell the way she has." He said shaking his head. "As a human she blushed if someone glanced in her direction."

"I wish I could have seen that." Just then a girl wearing a tight sharp V neck green sweater walked up and leaned forward, one hand on Jake's desk, giving him a great shot of her boobs falling out of her shirt.

"Hello there, my name is Kittie." She said holding up her free hand. "What's yours?"

Jake gave me a panicked look. "Jacob Cullen." He said looking down at his shoes as he shook her hand for half a second.

"I thought you were one of the new kids." She said batting her eyelashes. "So do you need any help around campus?" She asked leaning farther forward.

I glared at the girl, didn't she realize if she leaned anymore she was going to fall out of her shirt! Luckily the teacher chose that moment to call the class to order. And Kittie gave one last smile before walking toward the front row and taking her seat.

A minute later Jake leaned over to me. "That was the scarier than Alice on a shopping spree." He whispered.

I bit my tough to keep from giggling.

* * *

Jacob's POV

Why did we go to high school? Was there really any need? I mean we know everything the teachers have to say and the kids were complete morons!

The only bright side to my entire day was seeing Nessie in History, which I was getting ready to leave, if that clock above the door was correct.

I looked up but found that that girl in the tiny shirt was watching me over her shoulder and I quickly looked back down at my boots. I had never been so uncomfortable in my life! Well maybe on the plane here. Why were these people so sick!

I glanced over at Nessie who was sitting next to me and sighed. If for nothing else I could come to school to spend time with her….and keep the other guys off her. Not even half way through the day and she had at least 10 boys ogling her and drooling when she walked passed!

It was my right as the best friend to worry about that sort of thing. No matter what Nessie said. I mean, I didn't want her to be around a boy with only the thought of getting into her pants on his mind! And I didn't need to be a mind reader to know that that's what they were thinking. It was written all over their faces!

I took a deep breath, nothing was going to happen. Besides I was here, along with 6 other vampires who could be there in a flash if Nessie so much as squeaked.

Just then the bell rang. I stuffed my unopened book into my backpack and walked with Nessie out of the class room.

"Well I have Biology next." She said looking down at a sheet of paper.

Great, I had already done that. "I have Literature." I sighed.

Nessie shrugged, with a what-can-you-do-about-it face on. "Well we have Gym together after that." She said trying to sound up beat.

"Yeah." Nessie gave me one more smile before turning to walk away. "Wait Nessie!" I called rushing to grab her arm. She turned around and I looked into her brownish goldish eyes. I really couldn't blame all those boys for staring, she really was stunning.

"Yeah?" She asked, her warm breath tickling my face.

I shook my head. "Um, just be careful. Ok?"

Nessie smiled gently. "Sure, sure."

I smiled back and let her go. I watched her walk down hallway and disappear around a corner before turning in the other direction to head to my class, trying to shake off the funny feeling in my stomach.

I sat through my next class trying to concentrate on what the teacher was saying, but wasn't having any luck. I was too worried about Nessie. I knew I shouldn't be, she was half vampire! She could take care of herself. But I couldn't shake the uneasiness I felt.

By the end of class I couldn't tell you one thing the teacher had said. Or what any of the girls had said to me before and after class. The only thought I had was getting to Gym and making sure Nessie was alright.

I rushed out of the school building, out one of the side doors and followed the covered walk-way to the gym. I went through the double doors and scanned the room. I didn't see her, and I couldn't smell her, she hadn't come in yet.

The teacher, Coach Blanch, a sturdy looking woman with big arms and crazy curly brown hair, was sitting on the bottom seat on the bleachers as the class stood around talking.

I kept near the door hoping no one would come up to me. Luck was on my side, because a few minutes later Nessie walked through the door! Followed by that guy from lunch, what had she called him, Gary?

"Nessie." I said. She looked up relieved and I had to pretend to cough to hide my smile.

"Jake, I'm not late am I?" She asked coming to stand next to me.

I shook my head.

"All right! Class!" Coach Blanch yelled. "Head to the locker rooms and change into your uniforms and meet back out here in 10 minutes!"

At these word everyone made their way to the locker rooms. I waved to Nessie and followed the boys, as she followed the girls.

I barely got to see Nessie for the rest of the class, since the boys and girls were separated for the games. The guys were going to play basket ball and the girls were going to play volley ball.

As much as I hated being in this place, being around all these humans, I enjoyed playing basketball with them. Especially since that guy who was following Nessie around, Gabe (was that his name?), was on the other team.

By the end of the game I was grinning and he was sweating and had a black eye, where I accidentally backed into him with my elbow. And though there had been a foul, it was worth it!

I walked out of the boy's locker room with a big smile on my face thinking school just might be too bad after all.

* * *

**Again, (in case you didn't read my last note) I don't know when I'm going to be able to update again, I'm still out of town and won't be back 'till after Sun. **


	7. Chapter 7 Round 2

Jacob's POV

Today was going to be better. I was sure of it, because Nessie and I would be in all the same classes. I had to smile at the thought, now I could keep a closer eye on her. Yesterday had been pure torture. I couldn't do that again.

I was sitting next to Nessie, again in the back of Edward's car on our way to school. Nessie was wearing a red and white sweater dress thing with a wide neck that showed off her shoulders, the bottom reaching her thighs, and something Alice called 'leggings', half of her hair was pulled into a bun on the back of her head, the rest cascading down her back in wavy curls. In short she looked amazing.

I didn't like it.

I knew that boy, what ever his name was, that followed Nessie around yesterday would want to do that again today, only today I would be there, I wasn't going to let that happen.

"Jake?" Nessie's voice brought me out of my thoughts. I looked up at her questioning face.

"Hmmm?"

"We're here." She said motioning to the window at the school building.

"Oh, my bad." I said hopping out of the car. The rest of the family were waiting on the sidewalk.

"What were you thinking about?" Nessie asked putting her arm through mine. It felt good, her skin felt cool on my warm arm.

I shrugged. "Just about today." I said shortly. I knew Nessie would know I was leaving out something, but hoped she wouldn't press it. I didn't think she would like my plans for biting that human boy's head off if he came anywhere near her ever again.

She sighed but thankfully didn't ask me anything more. "Yeah, I'm excited that I don't have to face all those stares alone today."

We walked into the school building, Edward kissed Bella on the mouth and Nessie on the forehead before we all separated. Bella lead the way as we made our way to Algebra. We walked into the class room and sat on the back row of seats. Nessie sitting between Bella and me.

Everyone in the room was throwing glances at us, and they weren't very sneaky about it. Though it might have had something to do with the fact that we were sitting behind everyone.

Every guy in the room was looking over Nessie with lustful eyes and I had to fight the growl in my throat.

I was so distracted that I didn't notice the girl that I had seen yesterday, the one with the unflattering shirt, had walked right up to my desk. I sat back just in time as she sat down on my desktop. "Hello Jacob." She said in a low voice. I tried to keep the grimace off my face.

"Hey." I said, I couldn't remember her name so I left it at that.

"You weren't in here yesterday." She commented throwing one leg over the over, I guess trying to show off her legs or something. "Not that I mind, but why did you change classes?"

I didn't even look at her while I answered, I looked at Nessie. "Well there's someone I wanted to be with that was in this class."

Nessie's eyes gleamed with laughter and happiness and I heard that girl gasp.

"So-" She started, but just then the teacher called the class to order. The girl made her way to her seat with a sulky expression.

I barely listened as Mr. Jason started talking about something in the book. I just kind of looked at Nessie. She was so cute. Was I allowed to say that? Being a guy, did that make me less manly. Oh well. I didn't care, she was just too cute! Leaning over her school book with a line on her forehead, showing she was concentrating. I felt a smile on my face, I couldn't get rid of it.

I had probably been staring for a good ten minutes when Nessie glanced up. "Do I have something on my nose?" She whispered too low for human ears to hear.

Quickly I shook my head and looked away, my face felt hot. "No." Was all I said pinning my eyes to the teacher. What was wrong with me?! It wasn't new for me to stare at Nessie. Heck it was a daily occurrence! So why was I blushing? Blushing?! I didn't blush. Not that I couldn't, just didn't. I shook my head, I was giving myself a head ache with all these different thoughts.

So for the rest of class I decided not to think, if I did, I would probably think of how weird I was acting.

Though by the end of class I had the biggest head ache I had ever had. I wasn't very good at the not thinking.

We walked out of the classroom and Bella turned to us. "Well I'll see you guys later then." She said hugging Nessie, and then me "Take care of her." Bella whispered as she hugged me; so low I almost didn't hear it and knew Nessie didn't. I gave her a tight squeeze, trying to covey that I would, before Bella pulled away and was walking down the hall.

A cool hand slipped into mine. "Come on, we need to get a move on." Nessie said tugging me down the hallway. "We don't want to be late for class."

I smiled down at her. "Yeah, I'm really worried about that." She rolled her eyes before letting go of my hand, my smile faltered at that, and started ahead of me. I didn't have to even try to catch up to Nessie, my legs being 10 times longer than hers; I took three steps and was walking next to her again. We walked side by side, people continued to stair, and I didn't have to try very hard to ignore them. My thoughts had again turned to things I didn't understand. I had a feeling something was changing, something big, I just didn't have a clue as to what was changing!

I didn't even remember walking into the classroom but when I brought myself out of my thoughts I noticed I was sitting down in a room, people around me were talking to one another and the teacher was up at the chalkboard writing something on it.

I heard Nessie say something, I wasn't sure what, but when I turned to ask her to repeat what she said I saw she wasn't talking to me and I felt a growl rumble deep in my chest.

* * *

Renesmee POV

I walked next to Jake as we made our way to Miss Kim's classroom. I was slightly nervous, because last night I had decided to take a different look at school and the people in it. I had judged too quickly, I knew next to nothing about humans and the way their minds worked. I had no right to judge something I didn't understand.

So now that I was going to give these humans a try, maybe even befriend some of them, I was a wreck! I hadn't told anyone except mom about my decision, and I had told her about my fears. I didn't know how to converse with people. I didn't know anybody outside my family! How was I supposed to make small talk with a human? To learn about them, and them to learn about me? That's what friends did right? They talked to one another to get to know about that person.

I sighed. I just had to trust mom. She said it was okay to be a little scared; but that I shouldn't worry, it'll come naturally. I took a deep breath and walked into the class room and took a seat close to the back, Jake next to me. That was my one comfort, Jake was with me.

We sat for a few minutes, I could tell Jake was in deep thought about something and I didn't want to break his concentration so I just looked to the front of the room where Miss Kim was writing something on the chalk board on the wall.

"Hello Renesmee!" I heard a voice say.

I looked up and say Garret smiling down at me. I took a deep breath and smiled back, I could do this. "Hey Garret!" I said. "How are you?" That sounded nice, right?

"I'm good, what are you thinking about your second day of school?" He asked leaning against my desktop.

I couldn't help but glance at Jake, who still looked in deep thought. "I think I'm a little more comfortable than yesterday."

Garret didn't seem to notice my looking at Jake cause he said. "Yeah moving to a new place can be kind of weird."

I felt my eyebrows draw together. "But I thought you said you lived here your entire life?" How would he know what it was like?

He turned a little pink, I wonder why. "No, n-no I haven't ever moved. It's just my best friend, Justin Larkin, he moved here from GA about five years ago."

"Oh." I nodded my head. Yeah that made since. "That's cool, so when did it get easier for him?" I heard a low growl and peeked over at Jake who was now not looking deep in thought at all, but very mad, and he was staring at Garret. I tried to give him a warning look before I went back to Garret hoping he wouldn't notice Jake glaring at him. I thought I was doing a pretty decent job talking to him, and I didn't want Jake to mess me up.

Garret laughed completely unaware of Jake. "Well, if you knew Justin, you would understand but he still some times has trouble." I knew my face looked alarmed, it didn't get any easier!? But Garret quickly said. "But that's just the way Justin is. He is really weird that way."

I wasn't sure if I liked the fact that Garret would so willingly call his 'best friend' weird, but then again, maybe he was.

"Ok class lets get started before we're all old and fat." Miss Kim said from the front of the room.

Garret looked sullen as he moved from my desk and went to sit two rows in front of where I was.

Once the class started I looked over at Jake who was still looking like he was going to bite Garret's head off. "Would you stop that?!" I hissed making my voice lower so only Jake could hear.

He looked back at me. "Stop what?"

I rolled my eyes. "What do you think? Stop glaring at Garret!"

Jake's face hardened. "Why were you talking to him?" He hissed back.

"Because I'm trying to make a friend." I said looking around, several people were glancing in our direction.

"Why?"

Looking around again I turned to the front. "We can't talk about this now."

I could feel Jake's eyes on me through out the class, but refused to look at him. I knew I would start talking again.

Besides I liked Miss Kim, she was very nice and had an interesting view on things. I didn't want her to think I was being rude.

As soon as the bell rang for the end of class Jake and I walked out of the classroom and headed in the direction of the lunch hall. "So why were you talking to Garret?"

I sighed. "I just think I would like to try and make a friend." I knew I probably sounded silly. I had all I really needed and wanted in my family. But something in me wanted to _make_ a friend, to see if someone would want to be my friend, just because they like me. Not because they were family, or imprinted on me and had to be my best friend. I knew my family loved me, and not just because I was family, but still I wanted to make a friend.

Jake gave me a weird look, one of confusion. I just sighed and walked up to where the rest of our family was waiting on us.

"What's wrong angel?" Dad asked as we went through the lunch line. I sighed and touched his hand replaying him my time in Miss Kim's classroom.

I shrugged and said in my head, letting him hear it. "_Is it so bad to want to make a friend? To have someone who likes you, just for you and to hang out with them?" _I paused. _"I mean I know I could never be very close to a human, because of what I am, and what you are, but I could do it; right?" _I asked looking him straight in the eye. I wanted to know what he really thought, and didn't want to hear what he thought that I wanted to hear.

Dad's eyes were soft and comforting. "I may not understand the want for that, but if it's something you want to do, then there is no way I could tell you it's not okay." He said quietly. I smiled, dad could always make things better; I thought as I gave him a sideways hug.

My hand automatically went to dad's so I could think to him. _"Thanks daddy."_

Once we made it through the line we went to the same table we had last time. As we walked over I saw Garret sitting in the middle of another table surrounded by other students, all laughing and talking to one another. Except one of them, one sitting next to Garret who had black hair and black rimmed glasses and was looking no where but down at his slice of pizza. Maybe that was Justin.

I sat down next to Jake and mom, dad was on the other side of her and everyone else was on the other side of the table.

"So angel, how has your day been so far?" Mom asked moving some things around on her plate. I knew she was asking about the 'making friends' thing.

I nodded and smiled at her. "I think it's been pretty good." I said before taking a bite of greasy pizza. Ugh! I would really have to start bringing my own lunch.

I heard a huff and looked up at Rosalie. She looked positively murderous. "What's up with Rose?" I asked rather quietly, though everyone at the table could hear me.

Emmett looked like he was trying not to laugh. "Oh Rose just doesn't like this girl in our history class." He said quickly.

I raised an eye brow. "Really?" I had never known Rosalie to be one to let a girl, a _human_ girl to get her upset on any level.

Emmett smiled brightly and nodded his head. "Yep. I think her name was-" He was cut off when Rosalie let out a low scary growl.

"If you want to keep your head I suggest that you shut up." She said not turning away from what ever she was watching like a hawk over my shoulder. I had to take a peek. I tried to follow her glare and found a pretty strawberry blond haired girl walking away from the lunch line.

I was too scared to ask why she didn't like the girl, I didn't want to get on her bad side. No sane person did! Even if you are a vampire. I was just going to let Rosalie hate the girl, that was fine with me.

Nothing else really happened while we, meaning Jake and I, finished eating. When we were done we filed out of the lunch hall. I would have history with mom and dad next, but Jake would be going somewhere else.

I looked over at him, he still looked miffed at me, but I ignored that and hugged him around the waist. Mom and dad were waiting for me somewhere behind me and even though I knew dad would just hear it in his thoughts I took Jake's hand and thought,

_"Please don't be upset with me. I promise to explain everything later." _I said pleading him with my eyes to not be mad at me. Because I knew that if I didn't fix this now I wouldn't be able to concentrate all day.

Jake sighed. "I'm not upset; a little confused, but that's okay. Don't worry about it." He said and kissed me on the forehead before he started off in the direction of his next class. I stared after him 'till he was out of sight. I knew I had to get a move on, I didn't want to be late for history, but for some odd reason my legs weren't working properly at the moment. The spot on my forehead was still warm from his lips touch my skin.

"Angel we need to get going." Dad said from behind me and I turned and followed them as he and mom walked hand in hand down the hallway. I couldn't help but smile at that. It was beautiful; their love for one another. It was so powerful that it was impossible not to see, it just glowed off them like the sun glowed on our skin. Even when they were just walking down the hall with dad slinging his arm over mom's shoulder absentmindedly playing with one of her brown curls, it was obvious.

We had just walked into Mr. Jones' classroom when a girl who looked about 7 feet bounded up to us. "Hey! My name is Bethany!" She said rather loudly and stuck out her hand.

I took it and said. "I'm Renesmee Cullen, and this is my sister and brother Bella and Edward." Man that sounded funny coming out of my mouth. Mom and dad nodded politely but didn't shake Bethany's hand for fear of her noticing their cold skin.

"Yeah I know! _Everyone_ knows who you guys are! I would have introduced myself yesterday but I got sick half way through the day and had to go home before lunch. Sorry!" She said brightly, swaying back and forth. She was rather amusing to watch, she couldn't seem to be still for even a moment.

I blinked a couple times at her smiling face. "Oh, um, that's okay. Are you sure you're well enough to be here? You're not still sick are you?" I asked.

She shrugged. "Not really, after I finished throwing up last night I felt a lot better! And plus I wanted to meet you, I had heard you were really nice!"

I laughed to myself and could see out of the corner of my eye that mom and dad were doing the same. "Well I'm going to go find a seat." I said hoping I didn't sound rude or abrupt.

Surprisingly Bethany grabbed my hand. "No it's okay, I saved you a seat next to me!" She said and started pulling me to the middle of the class room.

I looked hopelessly over my shoulder at mom and dad. They shrugged and watch amused as Bethany led me to two seats near one wall.

"See? You can sit here!" She said proudly and sat down, I did the same. "You've probably had this question asked like a hundred times but I don't know the answer to it so I'm going to ask anyway." She stated matter-a-factly. "What do you think of Alaska? You moved from England right? It must be a big change. I couldn't imagine moving to a place so different!" She said all in one breath, she talk a mile a minute!

I stifled a laugh and said. "Yeah, it is a lot different. But I like. The people here are really nice." And though the people in England might have been nice too I had never met them. "It's cool that in everyone of my classes someone from my family is there with me. I think that makes it a lot easier."

"Do you miss your old home and friends?" Bethany asked putting her elbow on the table and resting her chin in her hand looking at me intensely, as if my answer was of great importance.

I thought about it, would it be weird if I said no? Maybe I should say yes and talk about how I promised to keep in contact through email and such. But I kinda liked Bethany, she reminded me something of Alice in a way. So I decided for the truth; or part of it at least. "I don't really miss my old house because the new one is just amazing, it's like a castle! And I didn't really have any friends back there, so there aren't any to miss."

I was surprised to see Bethany look genuinely sympathetic. "Oh. Well at least you won't have to worry about that here!" She said sounding chipper yet again.

I couldn't help the laugh that came out, but didn't get to comment because then Mr. Jones called the class to turn to page 70 in our books.

I happily listened to the teacher as he started to talk animatedly about the Civil War. I had mad two friend today!

Maybe school wasn't too bad after all.....maybe

* * *

**Hello peoples! Sorry it took me so long to update (but then again no really reads this anyway so I guess it doesn't really matter) I was visiting my bf and was WAY to busy to think about this.... sorry I have my priorities. :) But anywho hope you like this chapter, I would put up the next one right now but I'm being kicked off the computer right now. So please enjoy and REVIEW! I'll update soon!**


	8. Chapter 8 Huh?

Renesmee POV

As it turned out Bethany had gym with me, so since she was going to walk with me she got to meet Jacob, because he when I exited our history with Bethany Jake was leaning on the wall waiting for me.

"Hey Jake!" I said happily as he walked toward me and Bethany. "This is my new friend Bethany."

Before Jake even had the chance Bethany stuck out her hand and said. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Has anyone told you are _fine!?_"

I gasped and tried to stop the giggling that erupted in me. Jake looked stunned but took her hand anyway. "Um, no not really." He said and then grinned. "But I've always suspected it."

Bethany laughed and I joined her. I saw mom and dad wave as they walked away done the hallway smiling at me, I waved back.

When I got back to the conversation Bethany was saying. "-because you guys would look great on a Christmas card!" I looked at Jake who was almost gaping at Bethany.

"Huh?" I asked confused.

"So you two are together?" She asked looking between Jake and I.

I looked at Jake in shock. "WHAT?! N-n-no, no. NO!" I said though I wasn't sure why I was stuttering so much. "Why would you think that?"

Bethany looked between the two us again, her forehead wrinkled. "Hmm." Then understanding washed over her face and she smiled a knowing smile. "Oh! I get it now!"

I stared at her not having a clue as to what was going on. "What are you talking about?"

"Sorry my mistake." She said putting her hand on my shoulder. "I understand now. It just hasn't happened yet." She sighed. "But it will."

"What is going to happen?"

Bethany whistled for a second and started skipping down the hall. "Come on! We have gym!"

I stared after her before looking at Jake. He looked as confused as I felt, but then burst out laughing.

"Who the heck was that?" He asked as we started after her.

I shook my head. "I know as much as you do."

What had she been talking about? And what had made her think that Jake and I were together?! I peeked up at him; he looked shocked but slightly amused as well. "We'd better get going." I said and we walked slowly toward the gym.

As we walked a thought popped into my head. How many others thought that Jake and I were together? Or was it just Bethany's odd mind that thought that? I looked sideways at Jake, it may seem like we were together to people looking at us. I mean look at the rest of the family, all together, maybe it was just normal for them to assume that since all the rest of the Cullen's were paired up. But still, Jake and I together! That was just silly. He was my best friend, and since he imprinted on me that meant I was and always would be his best friend, nothing more.

I remembered how happy I was when Jake told me about imprinting, I was 2 years old and we were getting ready to move away from Forks. I had been really scared about having to leave Jake, I thought because his father and the pack were in Forks he wouldn't want to leave them to move with me. I had cried all night. In the morning Jake finally got it out of me, I hadn't wanted to tell him, I didn't want to make him feel bad about not leaving with me. I remember how he looked at me shocked and then smiled warmly at me saying:

_"Nessie, can I tell you something?" He asked wiping a stray tear from my eye. I nodded. "There is something about werewolves you don't know." He said looking me straight in the eye. "We are like a puzzle with lots of pieces that we have to put together. But Nessie, when you were born I did something called imprinting." I felt my forehead wrinkle. I had no idea what he was talking about, so I just listened intently. "It was like when I met you all my missing pieces came together and made me who I am. Do you understand?" He asked scanning my face. I wasn't sure if I did. I knew I liked puzzles, but I didn't like to think that Jake had been in a bunch of pieces. And how could I have put him together? I didn't remember doing that._

_I shook my head no. "What does imprinting mean?" I asked hoping that this would help me understand what he was talking about._

_He sighed. "It's something magical that werewolves do," He stopped and thought about something for a minute before he smiled brightly. "it means when I met you, you became my best friend. It means that I will always be there for you, and I'll never leave you."_

_My eyes grew wide. "Really?" I whispered. He nodded smiling widely. And then a thought accrued to me. "Does this mean you're coming with me to England?" I asked in a small voice, I was afraid of his answer. But again he nodded. "Promise?"_

_"Promise."_

"What you thinking about?" Jake asked as we headed outside and walked along the path to the gym.

I touched his hand showing him the memory. His eyes glazed over while he watched the images and he stopped walking so he didn't run into anything. His eyes focused again and he smiled down at me.

Smiling I pull my hand back and started toward the a few feet in front of us, I knew Jake was following behind me.

Gym was fun with Bethany; we ended up on the same team playing basket ball. She was really good, though she did have the advantage of being so tall. Though the way she played was so funny to watch! If she didn't have the ball she would sneak up behind the person with it and scream as loud as she possibly could, freaking the crap out of who ever she was screaming behind. At one point her shoe had flown off her foot while running down the court and hit a girl running behind her in the face. Though I couldn't say I minded; the shoe had hit Kittie.

By the time gym was over and everyone was heading to the locker rooms Kittie had a black eye, a girl whose name I think was Jasmine couldn't hear anything and I my face hurt from smiling so much.

Once I had finished changing I went out to meet Jake by the door. He was already there, a few guys gathered around him talking to each other. When I came into earshot, for a human anyway, they looked up with appraising eyes, looking me up and down, again and again. Their eyes made me uncomfortable but I walked up to Jacob anyway.

"Hey, ready to go?" I asked trying to ignore the three guys that were still staring; I think one had even started drooling!

"Yep." Jake said taking my hand and pulling me out of the group of guys. "See ya." He called over his shoulder before we walked out the double doors.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I finished changing and was walking out of the locker room when I notice a couple guys walking strangely close to me eying me nervously. I ignored them 'till I leaned against the wall next to the doors leading out of the gym and they were standing quietly in front of me.

"Is there something you want?" I asked wishing they would stop looking at me like I was some sort of god they wouldn't dare talk to.

Finally the one in the middle asked. "We were just wondering if you were planning to join the school's basketball team?"

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Not really."

The guy didn't look surprised. "Oh." I knew he wanted to say something else but he just stood there looking at me. Man that was creepy!

"Is there something else?" Why wouldn't they just spit it out?

This time the one on the left spoke. "Is Renesmee seeing some one?" He blurted out.

I fought the growl that threatened to burst out of me. But I couldn't help but say. "She's not interested."

The two on the left looked crestfallen, but the last one to talk was more determined. "Does that mean she is seeing someone?" He asked looking hopeful.

I groaned in my head. I knew if I said no then these guys would follow Nessie around and try flirting with her, but I couldn't lie to them, because what if they asked who she was dating? What was I going to say to that? Luckily I didn't have to say anything at all because Nessie came out of the locker room and was walking towards me.

I felt my relieved smile on my face. "Hey, are you ready to go?" She said not looking at the guys that couldn't stop looking at her.

I was afraid I would say something I would regret if I said much of anything so I went with a quick "Yep." and took Nessie's hand and quickly pulled her outside.

Once we were outside I slowed my pace. "What did those guys want?" She asked when we walked into the parking lot weaving between cars.

I huffed, why did she have to bring them up? "They just wanted to know if I was going to join the basketball team." I said shortly. I didn't know why but I didn't want to tell her about them asking about her availability.

"Oh." She said her eyebrows raising. "I thought I heard them say something about me."

I groaned out loud. "See, it's impossible to lie to you! Even if I do it without you knowing, you know the truth anyway!" I sighed. "Yes they asked if you were seeing someone." I didn't know why it bothered me. Just the thought of those guys being remotely close to Nessie in any way sickened and frightened me.

Sickened me because I knew, even if I wasn't Edward, what they were thinking. It was written all over their faces when they looked at her.

Frightened me because.......why?

I didn't know the answer to that. I could explain why the thought scared me so much.

"Really? Why wouldn't they just ask me?" She said coming to a stop beside Edward's locked car. "I think I would know better than you would."

My eyebrows came together. "But I _do_ know you're not interested in anyone. Right?"

"Oh course, but they didn't know that you knew." She stated leaning against the car. "Whatever. I don't really care. I'm sorry they bothered you about me though."

I looked down at Nessie; she was looking at hands that were laced together in front of her, her hair was behind her shoulders since most of it was still in its bun and I could see most of her pale neck and shoulders from the wide neck of her dress.

When had she become so beautiful? Well she had always been beautiful, but now....now it was different, more profound. I gulped and took a step closer to her putting one hand on the side of her face pulling her to look up at me her brown goldish eyes, what was happening to me? With no other reason but because I wanted to I pulled her into hug, pinning her between my body and the car. My head laid itself down on top of her's and I took in a deep breath; her scent filled my head like a cloud of mist making my thinking foggy. She smelled of tulips, but sweeter. I pulled her as tightly as I could to me, and I felt her arms tighten around my waist.

Again I got the overwhelming feeling that something was changing. Something I couldn't understand, something I could stop. But the fear was also there and I held Nessie even tighter.

I distantly heard someone cough and after a second realized that person was right next to me. I lifted my head and saw Edward looking at us with raised eyebrows. Abruptly, but dazed, I pulled my arms away from Nessie and looked down at her, wondering if she felt the same thing I did.

She looked up at me with wide eyes, apparently she hadn't noticed her father standing in front of the car. I almost forgot myself, almost forgot everything when I looked into her eyes. I blinked several times, what was wrong with me?! I pointed to Edward, and now Bella who were standing in front of the car looking at us.

Edward was staring at me with a confused and scared look, but it quickly changed to one of amusement. Bella was staring at Nessie with a knowing look, and happiness.

"Shall we go?" Bella asked brightly, and made her way to the passenger's door.

I nodded my head numbly and opened the door for Nessie. Once I had hopped in and shut the door we waited another minute for Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmitt to get to their car.

No one spoke on the ride home, but Edward had some classical something or another playing so it wasn't quiet. I peeked over at Nessie when we were about two minutes away from the house. I hadn't glanced in her direction the whole way, but I couldn't stand it. I had no idea what was going on with me anymore! All I knew was that I had to see her, even if she was only a foot away from me.

She was sitting with her hands folded in her lap, her head turned away from me, looking out the window. Like she didn't want me to see her.

But I could. I looked at the window, well the reflection on it. Nessie's face was complete blank, except her eyes. They were black.

I was shocked to see this, Nessie being only half vampire didn't have to feed off blood often, if at all. But being around humans was always harder if Nessie didn't drink blood once a month. And she had gone only a week and a half ago. Why was she so thirsty now?

I reached out and touched Nessie's bare shoulder; she jumped slightly and turned to look at me. "Are you ok?" I asked glancing to the front, I caught Edward's eye in the mirror.

Nessie looked to Bella nodded her head fast. "Yeah, I'm fine." She said quickly. Maybe too quickly. Again I looked up to Edward, he had seen her eyes too.

"Honey pull the car over." Bella said calmly, looking at her daughter. Edward gave her a questioning look but when he saw her face he did as she said. As soon as the car came to a stop Bella slid out of the car and walked to Nessie's door and opened it. "Come on Angel. Let's walk the rest of the way." Bella said taking Nessie's hand and pulling her out of the car and shut her door.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

Mom pulled me out of the car and I followed her as we walked slowly away from the road. We watched dad's car drive away before mom turned to me. "Sorry, I just thought it was getting kind of stuffy in that car, do you mind walking with me?" She asked wrapping her arm around my shoulders.

I shook my head. I didn't know what was going on with me today! Maybe the fresh air would help clear my head.

Because Jake sitting so close to me sure wasn't!

"Good! Besides we hardly ever get to spend any time together anymore." Mom said with a small smile on her lips. For a second I felt bad, it really had been a while since mom and I had a day to ourselves. I promised myself then that I would make plans to do something special with her soon.

I was slightly surprised when we started walking at human speed; though I preferred it, it gave me more time to sort through my unfocused thoughts. I had been pretty good all day 'till after gym. Until Jacob had started talking about those guys. Until Jake had asked me a simple question.

_"But I _do_ know you're not interested in anyone. Right?"_

Such a simple question should have had a simple answer; right? I sighed thinking about it. I had gave the simple answer, but when it came out my mouth it tasted wrong somehow; like a lie.

I hated lying. But mostly I hated lying to Jacob. I couldn't do it, and when I did it tasted like metal coming out and left the worst taste in my mouth 'till I told him the truth. And that's how I felt now. I could taste the remaining of a lie.

But it hadn't been a lie! I shook my head groaning. I didn't understand anything!

"Angel, I don't want to pry, I just want to let you know that I'm here if you need someone to talk to; or to just listen to you ramble while you sort through your thoughts." Mom said bumping my hip with her own.

I smiled at her and put my arm around her waist. "I know." I paused thinking. "And I would love to talk to you about this, but I just can't! I don't even know what I would be talking about." I sighed. "But as soon as I know something I'll let you know." I leaned my head against her shoulder.

"Ok Angel; just know I'm always here."

We continued the remaining walk home in understanding silence, my thoughts still raging trying to find some understanding in all the confusion inside my head.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I hopped out of Edward's Volvo and headed toward the huge heavy (for a human anyway) wooden double doors. Edward had said that Bella had told him in her mind that she wanted some time to talk to Nessie alone before they reach the house again.

I walked into the castle like house and headed straight to the kitchen. But it wasn't 'till I was looking unhappily at the contents of the fridge that I realized I wasn't even hungry! Sighing heavily I shut the door and headed up the stairs two at a time. When I reached the third landing I went straight to the hallway that split leading off to both mine and Nessie's. I walked into the hall and headed for my room; but I hadn't taken but two steps before I stop. I turned and looked at the only other door on the other side of the hallway. I faintly heard everyone who rode in Ross's car come into the house.

I debated for another minute before I dropped my backpack where I was and walked to the _other_ door. I didn't know why, but I felt like I needed to be closer to Nessie. I gently turned the green glass doorknob and pushed the door open; shutting it behind me. I took in a deep breath through my nose, relishing in the scent that greeted me. I walked slowly around the room, starting on the wall with her closet. It was completely full of clothes I'm sure Alice bought her, it had one of those pretty Chinese changing screens with a flower design on it. On the next wall wasn't anything but the perfect view of the snow covered ground. As was the same on the wall across from it, except it had a large purple reading chair that Nessie had said she _must _have last night while she and Emmitt had went out to buy a new Plasma because one of the ones of the second floor had a hole through it. (Never beat Emmitt in a video game; things get really hectic when you do. Like big holes in your Plasma!) Then on the wall across from her door was a tall white wooden dresser and a matching vanity. I stepped up to the beautifully carved vanity; there were a few things set on top of it. An old fashioned brush, comb, and mirror set that Rose had bought her for Christmas last year; a few make-up things I didn't know what were, a couple different colored ribbons that I had seen Nessie tie in her hair before and a pack of gum.

Not really knowing what I was doing I ran my fingertips along the brush, its soft bristling tickled. I picked up one of the red ribbons, it was made of fine silk and felt like it could slip through my fingers if I wasn't careful. I held it up to eye level and could smell Nessie's scent clinging to the small piece of cloth. I breathed it in.

Suddenly I heard Bella's voice from downstairs, and that meant Nessie was home now too. Not sure what Nessie might think if she found me looking in her room when she wasn't home I quickly made my way out of the room and to mine; grabbing my backpack off the floor on my way. Really I wasn't even sure what I was thinking about snooping around Nessie's room.

What had gotten into me?

Maybe it was time to consult someone who knew my emotions better than myself.... because it was obvious that I didn't know what was going on!

* * *

**Merry Christmas!! I'm sooo excited about Christmas! Hope everyone is having a happing holiday! Just wanted to let you guys know that I'll be up at my grandma's house 'til Sun. and may not get much writing done, maybe none...sad! Anyway everyone have a merry Christmas!**


	9. Chapter 9 Cheese Pie For You!

Chapter 9 – Cheese Pie for You!

Jacob's POV

The next couple days were spent in the same way; well except for the snooping around in Nessie's room and Nessie's eyes went back to normal after she went hunting that night. Though she said she didn't know why she had suddenly become thirsty.

Carlisle had talked to her about it for an hour the next day, but had come up with nothing. And he wasn't all that concerned about it. Said that we didn't know all that much about how Nessie's body worked and might have just needed the extra blood.

It was now Fri. and I hadn't yet found a good time to talk to Jasper. And I was starting to try and tell myself I didn't need to; I mean I could figure this out on my own, right? Wouldn't it be weird anyway to talk about my feelings with Japer?

A picture of Jasper sitting behind his desk hands folded in his lap and me laying on a long leather couch went to my mind and I cringed. No matter what, I would let that happen.

I sighed and sat up on my bed. The past three days had seemed normal enough. Nessie was really starting to like Bethany, and to my deep displeasure she had become friends with Garret as well. But I could tell she like Bethany more. At least there was that.

But even through all this, even though Nessie seemed back to herself, I could feel something different in the air. When I looked at Nessie, it was like I was looking at her through another pair of eyes. I was starting to notice things I never noticed about her. Like when she was happy, her hips swayed when she walked. Or how when she was in deep thought she bit on her bottom lip.

Or how nice Nessie's legs looked in those jeans she wore yesterday to school.

Groaning I hoped off the bed and walked out of my room. I had to talk to Jasper. There was no way around it if I wanted to stay sane.

Was it normal for you to think your best friend was nice looking? Well I had always thought Nessie was beautiful; was this much different. I knew the answer before I asked the question. Yes.

I looked around for Jasper and found him on the first floor sitting on the couch; Alice on his lap where she seemed to be having fun kissing Jasper's neck. I took one look at Jasper's dazed face and sighed to myself. There was no way he was going to talk to me now when he could just sit with Alice.

I walked out of the room quickly, not really enjoying watching them in their round of necking. I made my way up the stairs to the second floor, where Edward and Bella were.

Edward looked up at me when I entered the room with a strange expression. Bella looked too, but she just smiled her knowing smile and said. "Jake is there something on your mind?"

Some times it was so weird how she could tell when something was going on inside my head. But I wasn't sure if I was comfortable talking about Nessie with her father. "Well, kind of-" but I was cut off when Rosalie came down the stairs pulling Nessie behind her. My mouth snapped shut, but then my eyes landed on Nessie and it fell open. Wearing a cream colored sweater under a light tan vest, a matching mini skirt, black tights and a tan knee high boots; Nessie looked fantastic. I felt warmth in the pit of my stomach at the sight of her, it was something I didn't recognize.

"Well come on we're late as it is." Rose huffed rushing down the stairs.

Edward and Bella followed close behind. "And whose fault is that?" Edward called after her.

"Ready?" Nessie asked me. I nodded numbly. "Where are your books?" She looked at me puzzled.

It took a second for her words to register in my mind. "Oh. I left them in my room." I said.

Nessie raised an eye brow at me. "Well don't you think you might need them for school?"

I nodded again. "Oh!" She was waiting for me to go get them! Right. Dang, why was my brain in slow motion all of a sudden?

Quickly I ran up the stairs, grabbed my backpack from beside my bed and rushed back to Nessie. At first she didn't say anything, just stared. "Are you feeling sick Jake?" She asked after a minute.

"No."

She squinted up at me, eyes piercing my face. Then she put the back of her hand to my forehead; I had to chuckle at this, what good was that when my normal temperature was 109.8? She pulled her hand back frowning. "Are you sure you're ok?" She asked, worry soaked in her voice.

The thought of her worrying over me made me smile. "I promise. Never better!"

With one more critical looking over Nessie nodded her head and started down the stares. I followed her to the car and slid into the back seat with her. I spent most of the ride listening to Nessie and Bella talk about a history paper they had to turn in on Monday.

But my mind couldn't stay focused on the conversation; it was just focused on Nessie. The way her face lightened up the entire car and how happy it made me to hear her laugh. At one point she had been laughing at something Bella had said and put her hand on my forearm; it had sent a flash of heat through my entire body! Which was crazy since I was hotter than any human, and she was part vampire! Than made her even colder than humans!

I was glad when we finally reached the school and I could get out of the car. Maybe some fresh air would help clear my thoughts.

"Jacob." I turned and saw Edward staring at me.

"_What?"_ I asked in my head.

"I was just wondering, about you thoughts?" He said quietly. "They were kind of- confusing."

I groaned to myself; though Edward probably heard it. I hadn't even thought about Edward hearing my thoughts! What was he going to say to these new out of the blue thoughts?

"_Yeah tell me about it. I can't make any sense out of them either."_ I thought giving him a shrug.

He nodded with a thoughtful look etched into his face as he took turned and headed off after Nessie and Bella who were almost to the school doors.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

All through Algebra I stared blankly at my open text book, not really even seeing what was written on the pages; and thought about Jake. He was sitting next to me, like he had done everyday this week, watching the teacher. I tried to not stare at him, and I think I was doing a pretty good job too; though I couldn't help sneak a glance over at him every once in a while.

He had been acting kind of off this morning. And I couldn't help but worry about it; even though he told me he was fine. But it wasn't just this morning either. The past couple of days things had seemed a little different when I saw Jake. I didn't always think he was sick, but when I saw him a warmth came over me that I had never felt before. It was an amazing feeling! But weird; because I have no idea where this feeling is coming from.

And I've started noticing some things I've never seen before. Yesterday he and all the guys were playing football, so of course he wasn't wearing a shirt. Ok normal, when did Jake ever have a shirt on anyways. But while I watched him play I found my thoughts trailing off in different directions. Like how I liked the way he looked with out his shirt on. And the way his mouth looked so-

!

I nearly jumped out of my seat at the sound of the bell. Quickly I shook my head and shoved my book into me bag. I must be going crazy, why else would my brain be sending all these weird and confusing thought and feeling through me!?

"Renesmee are you alright?" I faintly heard mom ask.

I looked up, Jake was walking a couple feet in front of us, I turned to mom and her concerned face. "Mom I really don't know anymore." I said, my voice lower than a whisper.

Looking around she asked in a low voice. "Do you want to go some where and talk about it? We can leave if you want to." She put a hand on my shoulder.

I thought about it for a second. The thought was rather appealing, but I didn't want to do that five days into the school year. So I shook my head. "No, it's ok." Mom was still looking down at me anxiously. "But if it's ok, can we go somewhere after school? Just you and me?"

Mom nodded. "Of course angel. I'll tell your father later. We'll leave right after school." She said before she kissed me on the forehead. "I'll see you later." I nodded and mom smiled before turning down another hall.

When I looked up I saw Jake had stopped and was waiting for me. Looking at my feet I quickly walked up to him and we made our way to Miss Kim's class.

"What was that about?" He asked after a few minutes of silence.

I shrugged, I didn't really know what to say. I didn't think _'me and mom were just planning to go off into_ _the woods somewhere to talk about my awkward feeling towards you'_ would sound right. "Mom was just saying that me and her should do something together after school." I said as we walked into our class and took our seats.

I knew imminently that Garret wasn't here yet because if he ever got to class before me he would sit on my desktop and wait for me. But he wasn't there. For that I was relieved. It wasn't that I didn't like Garret, he seemed like a very nice guy, it's just some of the things he said made me a tad uncomfortable. Or maybe it was just the way he said some things, like they had second meaning.

Jake nodded and rested his chin in the palm of his hand. I stared at him from the corner of my eye, with his elbow on his desk and his hand holding his head, I got a really good view of his big arm through the tight long sleeves dark blue shirt he was wearing. And with the sun shining in through the window on the over side of Jake it cast the side I could see into a slight shadow, making him look even darker and more statue like. He looked in a way beautiful.

_What am I thinking!?_ I nearly groaned out loud in frustration. None of this made any sense! Why was I thinking like this? Why now? What was I even thinking? I wasn't even sure of that!

"Hey Nessie!" I heard a chipper voice from my side. I looked up and I did sigh out loud, though I don't think Garret heard me. "What's up?" He asked leaning on my desk top.

I couldn't help but glance over at Jacob. He hated Garret. And he didn't try very hard, if at all to hide that fact. And there he was glaring at him.

"Um, nothing much. Have you started on the Literature paper yet?" I asked not really sure what else to say. Though that seemed enough to him because he replied enthusiastically.

"Yeah, though I'm having a little trouble with it. It started out-" I didn't hear what ever he said next I saw Jake move out of the corner of my eye and I found myself peaking over at him, he wasn't glaring at Garret anymore. He was still looking at Garret, but the look on his face had changed, it was one of confusion and what looked like sadness!

Without thinking, or ever realizing that I was moving I slide out of my chair and knelt down next to Jake. When I took his hand it seemed to wake him up a little and he looked down at me, I thought I could faintly see pain in his eyes. "Jacob are you okay?" I asked quietly.

He looked down at me confusion taking over his entire face, blocking out anything I might have seen a second ago. "Yeah, Nessie I'm fine." He said still looking at me confused, like he was seeing a stranger for the first time.

Starting to get confused myself I blinked a few times, had I seen anything on Jake's face? Or had I just imaged it? "You sure?" I was going crazy, that was the only explanation.

"Yes." He said looking me straight in the eyes.

Feeling rather silly I nodded and got back into my chair. Garret was looking at me with raised eyebrows. I couldn't blame him, that probably looked really weird to him. I mean if I saw someone do that, just out of the blue turn to the person next to them asking if they were alright I would really questioned that person's sanity.

Miss Kim came to my rescue by starting the class at that moment, sending Garret to his seat near the front of his room.

I didn't hear anything Miss Kim said, my thoughts were on, well…my….thoughts! I laid my head on my folded arms that were on my desk. I couldn't even think straight anymore! I was so confused I was ready to cry! Nothing was make any sense anymore!

"Renesmee?" My head snapped up at the sound of Jake's voice. He was standing in front of my desk, the room was almost completely empty. "Nessie what's wrong?!"

Horrified I realized I had a tear sliding down my face! What was going on?! I didn't cry, never! Quickly I wiped the tear away and stood up. "Nothing. My eyes are just tearing up." I said pulling my bag over my shoulder. "Come on every ones probably waiting for us." I said and started for the door before he could questioned me.

But he did anyway. "Nessie! Why were you crying?" He said as he caught up to me.

I sighed and went for the truth. "Jake, I honestly don't know. It was just a fluke thing." I said and then looked him in the eyes hoping he would drop it. "Really don't worry about it. I'm not." I said with a shrug.

Jake watched me for a minute before he nodded. "Okay." He said and we walked up to the doors of the cafeteria where everyone but Alice and Jasper were waiting for us.

I quickly made my way to mom and grabbed her hand.

"_Mom I've changed my mind. Can we leave now? Please?"_ I thought to her while pleading with her with my eyes. I couldn't stand to be in this place anymore, I just wanted to be out in the middle of nowhere and scream as loud as I could!

She nodded and her and dad's eyes met and I knew that mom had lowered her shield and was telling dad what was going on. He nodded a moment later and kissed mom on the cheek. After mom grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the exit. I followed her to the parking lot and to dad's Volvo. Normally I would have asked why we didn't just run where ever we were going to go, but right now I just didn't care enough to. I hopped in and closed my eyes and listened to mom start the car and turn on something soothing music; it was a CD of some of dad's work on the piano.

I listen to the music and tried not to think. I was too much work to get out a coherent thought. A little later I felt mom park the car and turn it off. I opened my eyes and saw we were home.

"We can go somewhere else if you want. I just thought we could leave the car here." Mom said putting the keys into her black leather jacket she was wearing.

I shook my head. "No this is fine." I sad and slid out of the car. I didn't stop 'till I got to my room; mom right behind me. I curled up in the middle of my bed, my head laying on mom's lap and she gently combed her fingers through my hair.

I didn't say anything for a while, and just let her fingers sooth my mind. Mom didn't say anything during this time, like she sensed that I needed this time to not think and waited until I was ready to talk.

"Mom, there is something wrong with me." I finally said quietly.

Mom's fingers paused for a second before they continued through my hair. "Why do you say that?"

I sighed. "My mind is all messed up. I can't even think! It's like all my thoughts are covered in mud or something!" I paused, how was I supposed to explain something I didn't understand myself? "Nothing seems to make sense anymore. And I've been feeling different things I've never felt before."

Mom didn't answer right away. "What new things have you been feeling?" She asked at length.

I shrugged. "I don't really know! That's the problem! I start to feel all warm or maybe content, or something! But I don't really know what it is." I looked hopelessly up at mom who was looking at me with knowing eyes.

"And when do you feel like this?" She asked; it almost looked like she was smirking.

"When I'm around Jacob." I said. I knew that part. That was easy.

Mom nodded. "Tell me how Jake is."

Not really sure why I shrugged. "He's fine. I mean nothing really new that I know of." Mom's eyes told me to go on. I sighed. "He really doesn't like school all that much; or any of the people in it. Besides Bethany. I think he gets a kick out of her." Kittie's face popped up in my mind. "There is this girl named Kittie, she is in one of our classes and she is always all over Jake." I could hear the malice in my voice, but I couldn't help it! That girl drove me crazy! "And she's always wearing these clothes showing off her boobs and legs and stuff. She looks like a hooker."

Mom looked at me with amused eyes. "You really don't like this girl do you?"

"I can't stand her."

"And why is that?"

I felt my eyebrows shoot up. "Mom I just told you she looks like a hooker!"

She just pursed her lips in thought. "You know half of the girls in the school dress like that. But you don't seem to have a problem with them."

I huffed. "Well they aren't throwing themselves all over Jake! Kittie on the other hand is, and is always trying to find new ways of showing off more of her chest." Did we really need to talk about her? Whenever I thought about Kittie it made my blood boil.

"So you don't like Kittie because she likes Jake?" Mom asked.

"Well, yeah I guess so. I mean if she didn't she wouldn't even bother with him."

Mom was silent for a while. I sighed and waited for her to finish thinking.

"How do you feel about Jake?" She finally asked.

I looked out at the snow. It was a silly question really, Jake was my best friend. But something in my head wasn't adding up. "He's amazing, but he always has been. He is sweet and funny; and has the biggest heart." I paused and a memory popped into my head. "When I think about Jake, I think about when he brought me home Twilight. He hated cats, but because he knew I wanted one he got her for me." I sighed and closed my eyes, I felt that warmth feeling fill my stomach again. "He is so loving and is such an amazing person, even if he doesn't see it."

I'm not really sure for how long but we stayed in silence for quite a while before Mom finally asked.

"Do you think Jake it good looking?"

Imminently the picture of Jake running around in the back yard, wet and shirtless the sun shining down on him, his hair pulled back into a ponytail popped into my mind. Oh yeah.

Wow wait! WAIT! Jake is good looking?

Well he was, I had even told him he was beautiful once. So what was wrong with thinking he was good looking? Which he _was_. I wasn't really sure why, but I knew that this time it was different. The way I saw him in my mind was different; he was still beautiful, but he was also…something else too…

Mom sighed. "Well baby, I think this is one you're going to have to figure out on your own. I really don't know what to tell you."

I nodded. I had expected this, but I was glad she had listened to me; it made me feel like a huge bolder had been lifted off my chest.

"But," She added after a moment. "if I could give you this one piece of advice." She paused for another minute. "You're not going to understand everything in life, because if you did, you would never learn anything. So just because you don't understand these new feelings and things doesn't mean they are wrong. And I know this is going to sound like a cheesy line from a movie but, trust your heart on this one. It will usually lead you in the right direction."

"Thanks mom." I said quietly. "And you were right, that did sound cheesy." Mom sighed and I just laughed. "But really mom, thanks for listening." Mom leaned down and kissed my head. Neither of us said anything or made a move to leave the room. "Can we just sit here for a while? I really like it right here." I said closing my eyes again.

I heard mom laugh lightly. "Sure thing angel. We can stay here as long as you like."

* * *

**HEY! HAPPY NEW YEAR! Sorry it took me so long to update. I seem to be saying that a lot lately! Sorry! But I'm out of town yet AGAIN! I just can't stay home… I don't know why, I really love my home. (tear tear) Anyway I wanted to let you know the reason I named this chapter 'Cheese Pie For You' was for my brother. He came home from school for Christmas and told me all he wanted for Christmas was for me to name a chapter in my story that. So I did! Anywho I hoped you guys like this chapter! I'll be home hopefully on the 13****th**** so I'll be able to get some more writing done! But I'll try to at least get up one more chapter before then. Please remember to review!**


	10. Chapter 10 Jasper in the House!

Jacob's POV

I watched Bella lead Nessie by the hand out of the cafeteria. I looked around but everyone seemed just as confused as I was; except for Edward. I gave him a questioning look but he ignored it and headed for the lunch line. I followed closely behind him, intending to question him as soon as we sat down.

Which I did. "Edward what-" But he cut me off.

"You I can hear you asking these questions before you actually ask, so please don't repeat them to me." He said sitting down with a sigh.

I sat across from him. "Then tell me what's wrong with Nessie." I said not even glancing at the food on my tray. I wasn't very hungry.

"I don't know. All Bella told me was that she and Renesmee were going home early and that she would come pick us up after school since we all can't fit into Rose's car."

That didn't help me much. All I could think was that I had done something to upset her. She had been worried about me this morning, and in Lit. she had also asked if I was 'okay'.

Maybe I had said something then. I couldn't be quite sure, I hadn't really paid attention. I don't know what had come over me, I just remember watching Nessie talk with Garret and all of a sudden I had felt this sadness come over me. That was probably made Nessie worry about me, it was written on my face. Sighing I played with the food on my tray, not even bothering to try and eat any of it. I sat in silence for the rest of lunch, not really listen to what anyone else was saying.

I hope she is okay; was all that kept running through my mind as I sat playing with the food on my plate. After about thirty minutes though it I couldn't stand just sitting there, so getting up I dumped my tray in a trash can and left the cafeteria. I absentmindedly walked through the hallway, not really paying any attention to where I was going; it didn't matter, I had half an hour to kill. I walked out of the door leading to the gym, and noticed for the first time that the paved path lead in two different directions. Not really finding any reason not to, I started off in the paved walkway leading away from the gym. I followed it, my steps leaving foot prints in the snow. Confusion held my mind from thinking of anything but wondering what Nessie was doing right now. After walking a little a structure rose above me, and I looked around me. It was a football field surrounded by stacks and stacks of bleachers. I walked into the stadium and climbed up the bleachers 'till I was to the top and sat down on the wall of the stadium letting my feet dangle, faced away from the field. I was up probably 80 feet and got a really good view. I looked out at the mountains towering in the distance, covered completely in white. It really was beautiful. Nessie would really like it.

Renesmee. What was going on between us? The never answered question popped into my mind again. Something was changing; and I think she knows it too. Looking over the white in front of me a memory came to my mind and I smiled.

_"Nessie!" I yelled running through the house and down the hall where her room was. She was fast asleep; and normally I wouldn't dream of waking her up, but this was just too good to pass up! "Nessie! Wake up." I said softy, gently shaking her body._

_Groaning Nessie turned over and looked up at me through half opened eyes. "Jake this had better be good or I'm going to bite your head off." She growled._

_I chuckled and leaned down closer to her. "Trust me you're going to want to go outside right about now." I said trying to stop myself from just throw her over my shoulder and carry her outside to see it!_

_"What? Why would I want to do that?" She asked and looked over at the clock on her nightstand. "Jake it's four in the morning on a Saturday! Why can't it wait 'til tomorrow?" She complained pulled the covers up over her head._

_Shrugging I stood up. "Ok what ever, just thought you might want to see the snow piling up outside." Nessie shot out of the covers. "But I can see you're just too tired-" I didn't get to finish because Nessie squealed and ran to the window._

_"Holy crow!" She jumped up in down in front of her window and clapped her hands. "Oh my gosh! Come on!" She grabbed my hand and pulled me out of her room and all the way out of the house. She stopped dead just outside the door._

_I looked down at her. "What's wrong?"_

_Nessie shook her head, an look of awe on her face. "It's beautiful." She whispered, I could see her breath rise up a little before evaporating._

_I watched as she made her first step off the front porch and into the snow barefoot. "It's cold." She said surprised. "I can't believe it!" She spun around in slow circles taking in everything around her. I watch as she turned around and around as snow fell all in little flurries all about her. She looked like a angel._

That had been her first time seeing snow. She had been so infatuated with it she had stayed up the rest of the night sitting in my lap in the middle of the yard, watching the snow fall. And I had to admit that it was a pretty amazing night for me also.

And now we were living in a freakin winter wonderland! I knew Nessie really loved it. She hated summer just because it wouldn't snow and begged us every break to go somewhere it would snow. I wonder if she would finally get sick of it after living in it for the next three to four years? Some how I doubted it.

There was something about her in the snow. She looked different, more at home than anywhere else in the world. She looked so angelic with white all around her her brown curls falling around her shoulders and down her back, her bronze eyes glowing, it was breathtaking.

Sighing I rubbed my face with my hands. It was settled. I really need to talk to Jasper.

I sat there for the next twenty minutes or so, before I thought about heading back inside. Lunch was going to be over soon and I needed to go by my locker before Mrs. Nickles' class.

With no enthusiasm I got to my feet and took one more look around. No a soul in sight, just snow. I turned to head down the stairs when a thought came to me. I felt my eyebrows rise; right before I grinned.

Turning back away from the field I looked down the backside of the stadium, there wasn't anything that would brake. Chuckling I took one more look around, no one; before I stepped off the side of the wall.

Wind rushed past my face, pulling my shirt upwards and throwing my hair everywhere. I laughed; this was awesome! I fell relishing in the cool air flying at me, the earth rushing closer and closer to me. Right before landing I bent my knees for the impact. I landed with a thud; making feet prints 6 inches deep in the ground.

"Oops." I muttered. I hadn't really thought about that. Looking around I quickly stomped on the ground evening it out; making it look just like an uneven patch of dirt, then covered it with snow.

Still feeling hyper from the fall I jogged back to the school building, and to my locker. But by the time I got to Mrs. Nickles' class room I couldn't continue to grin. Miley Crick was in this class. And worse than that she was my lab partner.

Sighing I took my seat in the second row of work tables; there was a empty chair next to me. At least for now. Most of the room was empty; only two others were here yet. I must have been earlier than I thought. A couple minutes later I really wished I had stayed out in the bleachers longer. A tall girl with flaming red hair wearing a shirt I felt embarrassed just by seeing came in and sat down next to me.

"Hello Jacob!" She said in a high voice, leaning over to show off her chest.

Feeling like I was about to throw up I managed a. "Hey."

Miley smiled widely. "Has your day been as boring as mine? I've been so bored I fell asleep in my history class! I mean you think after teach for over ten years you could learn how to lighten up the topic! But no he just drones on and on. You know I-"

I didn't even bother listening any father than that. When I had first met Miley I had tried listening to her, but all she did was whine about how horrible the teachers were and how bad her ex-boyfriend treated her. I couldn't even make myself try. I had forgotten how annoying humans were.

Luckily class started shortly after that; and I was saved from having to pretend to listen to her.

* * *

I walked out of Mrs. Nickles' class room and was heading toward the gym when I heard someone shout from behind.

"JACOB BLACK!"

Well that was a new one. No one in the school had the guts to talk to a Cullen, let alone call them out in the middle of the hallway where everyone could hear. If it wasn't for the fact that I recognized the voice I would have been shocked. Though I was confused.

Turning around I saw Bethany Warner running flat out towards me, shoving a few people who didn't get out of the way in time. Including Miley!

"Yes?" I asked trying to keep from laughing.

Gasping for breath Bethany choke out. "Where is Nessie?"

"She had to leave early. She was starting to feel sick. Why? Is something the matter?" Why did she need Nessie so badly to run all the way from her last class, which was on the other side on the building to find her? I mean, we would be in gym together, why couldn't it wait 'till then?

Bethany gulped in a couple deep breaths before answering. "No. Nothings wrong. Why would you ask that? She just wasn't in class and I was wondering why."

No way. "Really? You ran all that way? You couldn't just wait until gym?"

Bethany looked at me like I had grown a second head. "Why would I have done that?"

"But-" I thought about trying to explain that we would have been in the same room in two minutes if she had just gone straight to the gym after her last class, but instead I said. "You know what never mind. Come on lets get going."

Bethany smiled and walked beside me. "Do you bite your nails?"

I bit back a laugh as we walked into the gym. Ok, so not all humans were bad.

* * *

I walked to the parking lot; at first I was confused, the Volvo was missing. But then I saw it in a parking space a few slots away and then remembered that Bella had taken it with Nessie.

I walked up the car and hopped in. Bella was sitting in the passenger's seat; no one else was in the car.

"She wanted to stay home and have a little time to herself." Bella said peeking back at me over her left shoulder, before I could even ask.

I sighed out loud. "Is she ok?"

Bella eyed me thoughtfully for a minute before she nodded. "Yeah, just a little confused." I was about to ask about what but Bella held up a hand. "Don't ask. It's a girl thing."

I wanted to groan, but I didn't. I hated 'girl things'. Because the 'thing' was usually about a guy! How it made any sense was beyond me.

A couple minutes later Edward walked up to the car; along with Jasper.

Edward jumped into the driver's seat and Jasper opened the back door. "Jacob I believe you are getting ready to be kicked out of the car." He said with a grin.

"What did you and Alice switch powers for the day or something?" I asked sarcastically. Jasper just shrugged. "Really, I'm being kicked out?"

"If you don't mind I would appreciate it if you would walk home with Jasper." He said.

"Why?"

"I would like to take my wife on a date; and no offence, I don't want you to come." He said sarcastically.

"Oh, my bad." I muttered and got out of the car.

"Thank you." Edward said smiling as he drove out the school parking lot.

"Well I guess it's just you and me old boy!" Jasper said coming up beside me.

"Yep." I said and we started off at a human walk. We couldn't go any fast until we got off the school grounds and away from any humans. "Why did you come with me? You know I've been known to walk on my very own from time to time?"

Jasper shrugged. "Alice told me to."

"Ah. Now it makes sense." I said with a chuckle.

We walked in silence for a while, still at human speed. We were just about out of sight of the school when I decided it probably now of never. So I asked. "Jasper, do you mind me asking a stupid question?"

Jasper shook his head. "Not really, if I did I don't know how I would have managed living with Emmitt for so long."

I laughed. "Yeah." Feeling a more than a little stupid I looked down at my feet.

"Jeeze why are you so nervous?" He asked looking at me. "You're not going to tell me you realize that you're gay and you are secretly in love with or something; are you?"

"No!" I said my head shooting up. How was I supposed to ask this? Sighing I spit out the first thing that came to mind. "Could you explain my feelings?"

Jasper looked puzzled for a moment. Then recognition flooded his face. "Um, what do you mean?"

My eyes narrowed. "You know exactly what I'm talking about."

Jasper sighed. "Why don't you tell me what you think you've been feeling and I'll see if it jogs my memory?" He suggested, a sort of challenge in his eye.

Groaning I looked up to the sky, it was thick with white clouds. "I don't know! I just feel like something is changing. My way of thinking, my way of seeing things." I looked over at Jasper, he saw staring at the ground. "Do you have any idea what I'm talking about?"

He nodded. "Talk to me about Nessie."

"What about her?"

"Oh come on. You know she has almost _everything_ to do with this." He said rolling his eyes. "Talk to me about how you think of Nessie."

Uhg, I didn't think I wanted to do that. I wasn't even sure what I thought about her. But the answer should be easy shouldn't it? It should be the same answer that I always gave. "She is my best friend." I said, and then paused. Why did that not sound right? "She's always been my best friend." Sighing I let the words I hadn't let myself even think because of their insaneness tumble out of my mouth. "But it's like suddenly that's not enough anymore. Every time I think of her as my _friend_ I feel like something important is missing." I said in a rush.

Jasper looked at me with a sympathetic smile. "Yeah, that sounds about right." He said with a soft chuckle. "Jacob, I'm not going to tell you what to do. Because I've had a conversation like this before where I gave the person the easy answer and it turned out bad. And I'm not going to give you an answer you're going to like. But it's the only one I know to give you." He paused looking thoughtful for a minute. "This is just one of those things that is going to take time to understand. That if you try to rush and skip ahead to find the answer you'll probably regret it." He shrugged. "Just let live. Do what you want to, not what you think you _should_ want to. And this is going to sound sappy as all heck, but here it goes. Listen to your heart; not your head. Because feeling aren't meant to be rationalized."

Not really sure what to say I just nodded.

"Come on, we should get home." Jasper said and started running at vampire speed. I followed behind him in silence. My thoughts whirled around in my head.

Don't be rational. Hmm, this could be interesting.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

Mom had went to go pick up dad and Jake and I was left sitting on the edge of my bed wondering; mostly about Jake. I trusted mom more than anybody; except maybe Jake, and I trusted that she knew what she was talking about. But what was I supposed to do? She had said trust my heart; but what did my heart want?

To see Jake.

Well that was easy! Smiling I got to my feet and rushed into Jake's room where I would wait for him. I sat down on his bed, leaning against his pillows. His scent was all over the room and I breathed it in. I loved this smell; like fresh air and trees and mist all rolled into one. It was perfect. Sighing I looked around the room while I waited for everyone to get home.

But after a few minutes my thoughts came to haunt me. Was it really that easy? All this confusion I'd been feeling lately couldn't just be fixed that easily.

NO! I shouted at myself. I wasn't going to think about it! I was going to see Jake and go from there! Quickly I shut my mind down and thought of nothing; as best I could.

A couple minutes later I heard Rosalie's voice from down stairs as she entered the house. "What do they see in her! And she thinks she's all that! It's insane!"

I giggled and sat up a little and waited to hear Jake's voice. But it didn't come, neither did mom's or dad's. But mom had mentioned something about maybe going out with dad later today, so that's probably where they were. But where was Jake? And Jazz?

Climbing off the bed I made my way down the stairs to the second floor where Emmitt was sitting with an X-Box controller in his hand. Some times it amazed me how quickly he could turn that thing on and be in the middle of a level.

"Hey kiddo! What's up?" He asked not taking his eyes off the screen.

I stood behind the sofa. "Nothing much. Do you know where Jake and Jazz are?"

"Um," He paused to blow some alien's head. "Jake had to walk because Eddie and Bella wanted to go out and Jasper went with him."

Puzzled I walked back up to Jake's room and sat down. Why hadn't they all just ridden in Rosalie's car? Sighing I settled back into Jake's large bed ready to sit hear 'til Jake and Jazz got home.

I didn't have too long to wait. About ten minutes later I heard Jasper calling for Alice. Smiling widely I sat up and waited for Jake to walk through his door. Which he did, 14 seconds later.

"Hey." He said smiling. He dropped his backpack by the door and came to sit next to me. "How you feeling?" He asked, his eyes scanning my face.

I couldn't keep the smile off my face. What has been wrong with me the past couple of days? This was Jacob; my Jacob. Hm, I like the sound of that. "Actually I feel pretty stupid." He raised his eyebrows at me. "I shouldn't have left like that. It was dumb." I really couldn't see why I had been such a mess. I had no reason to be.

"It's not that big of a deal. Don't worry about it." He said brushing some hair out of my eyes. His finger tips grazed my forehead and the warmth of his touch stayed long after his fingers moved. "Do you want to talk about it?"

I shook my head no. "Naw, I'm all talked out on the topic."

Jake nodded then looked down. "But we're ok? Right?" He asked quietly.

Shocked I grabbed him with both hands by the face and pulled his head up, so he had to look at me. "Jake? We're fine. I'm sorry I've been acting all weird lately; but it's all going to get better from here ok?"

Jake stared into my eyes and I felt myself blush, it was like he could see into my soul, know exactly what I'm thinking. My breath caught as a sudden desire hit me. It was so alien that I almost didn't know what it was. But after a moment I realized what it was.

I wanted to kiss him.

I felt my hands fall from Jake's face; but no other part of me moved. I felt frozen in place.

"Nessie?" I faintly heard Jake call out to me. But I couldn't respond. "Nessie?" His hands came up to cup my face. "Renesmee?!"

Hearing the urgency in his voice I was able to suck in a deep breath again. I blinked and focused on his face. His beautiful face.

The warmth I had been feeling when I was around Jake suddenly explode, into an overwhelming feeling of something so big and grand I had to gulp in a breath of air.

What was happening to me?

* * *

**Hello my fantastic readers! And even more fantastic reviewer! Hope everyone enjoys this chapter! Just to give you guys an update, I'm still out of town and will hopefully get back on the 13th. So I'll get some more writing done then, if not before! But enough about me; I know the whole part with Jasper was kind of short, and I'm sorry. But PLEASE review anyway, I don't care if you loved it or hated it, just give me some feedback! Anywho, I'll try to update again soon! God Bless!  
**


	11. Chapter 11 Jasper out of the Hosue!

Jacob's POV

"But we're ok? Right?" I asked looking down at my hands. I couldn't look her in the face. I was scared of what I might find there.

The words had barely left my mouth when a set of warm hands came to hold my face. Nessie's hands were warm? When did that happen? But they felt so good on my face I could ponder that. Couldn't even remember what I had just said. My heart pounded in my chest. "Jake? We're fine. I'm sorry I've been acting all weird lately; but it's all going to get better from here ok?" I stared into her eyes and stopped breathing. Her eyes looked more gold than ever, yet dark with some emotion I couldn't begin to understand. I tried to pull in a breath, but all I got was Nessie's sweet scent. And to my surprise Nessie's face had a beautiful glow from blushing. I sighed in contentment. I could stay like this, right here, and be happy for the rest of my life.

But then Nessie's hand dropped from my face, and she looked like she had just seen a ghost.

"Nessie?" She didn't even respond, just stared off into oblivion. "Nessie?" I cupped her face with my hands. Still she didn't move. Panicking I sat forward. "Renesmee?!"

I heard and saw her taking in a shaking, but deep breath. She blinked and when her eyes opened they were focused on me, with a look of shock and I think wonder.

Then her expression changed, so fast I was taken back by her beauty. Suddenly, she looked different; her face glowed with a dazzling intensity.

But just as soon as it was there, it was gone; replaced by shock and confusion. "Renesmee? Are you ok?" I asked softly. I wasn't sure how, but I knew something big had just happened with Nessie. I didn't know what, but I knew _something_ had just happened.

She didn't reply for a few minutes; just looked at me. And I realized I hadn't let her face go; oops. Slowly I removed my hands, they felt oddly cool.

"Um, yeah." She said and took another deep breath. "I'm fine." She said looking a little shaken.

Not really wanting to be nosy I didn't ask about what happened, I knew it was something that she would tell me when she was ready. But she still looked like she had seen a ghost and I had to ask again. "You sure?"

Nessie nodded like in a daze and got up off the bed. "I'm just going to lie down for a bit. I'm really tired." She said and then was gone from the room.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I ran as fast as I could down the hallway and into my room. I didn't even make it to the bed, I just crumbled into a pile on the floor in front of my closed door. I could feel myself shaking all over, but I couldn't stop it. I laid there for a long time, trying my hardest not to think, but after some time I thought my thoughts were going to crack my head open unless I let them through. As soon as I opened my mind, all these thoughts came crashing into my head at once and I felt a whimper come out of my mouth, though I couldn't hear it for how loud my thoughts were screaming.

_You want to kiss Jacob Black! He's your best friend!_

_More than that, kind of like a brother if you think about it! EW!_

_No he is NOT! He is not my brother! He has never been my brother!_

_That's right you just go on thinking like that, but what will the others say? They all think of him as your brother. What are they going to think when they find out what you're thinking? What you're wanting?_

I had to turn them off again. I couldn't stand it!

Suddenly I was being pushed from the back of the door and Jasper walked in. He didn't say anything just picked my body up like I was 1 year old again ran out of the house. As soon as we were out of vampire ear shot he said softly. "It's going to be ok." And he kept running. I didn't even pay attention to where we were going; I just hid my face into Jasper's shirt.

After some time we stopped moving and I looked around. We were in a clearing surrounded by trees. In the middle of the clearing there was a frozen over lake. I looked around and let my mind wonder. Everything was of course covered in a beautiful white that sparked as much as vampire skin on a sunny day.

Jasper set me down on a large rock that was embedded into the ground and sat down next to me looking deep in thought. I noticed the front of his blue sweater was wet; and then I noticed I was crying. And suddenly I knew why he brought me here. He could feel feeling! He could feel my feeling! He had felt my feeling of wanting kiss Jacob!

Feeling faint I took a deep breath. "Jasper, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to! I really didn't! It just sort of happened! I don't know why, there must be something wrong with me!" I said sounding more frantic than I had ever heard myself sound before.

Jasper wrapped his arm around my shoulders pulling me into a hug and I fell into it. "It's ok. No one is mad at you. Don't worry. I just wanted to make sure you were alright. I felt you frightened and confused, that's why I brought you here." He kissed the top of my head. "Really Nessie, it's ok. Come on I have something for you." He said pulling back. I leaned up and noticed for the first time that he had something slung over his left shoulder. He pulled them into his lap and I saw they were ice skates.

I could feel Jasper working his magic on me as he handed me the white skates. "They should fit you. I had to sneak into your room to find your size but they are a size 7 ½."

I threw myself at Jasper. "Thank you!" I said and looked at the skates. "You know you could have just asked Alice. She buys me more shoes than I buy myself." Actually I think I had only ever bought one pair of shoes.

He shrugged. "But I felt like that was kind of like cheating. Besides it was kind of fun to sneak around a little." He said with a grin.

I smiled, I couldn't even make myself scold him for going into my room without my knowing it. I sighed and looked at the skates. "Why aren't you even asking me about what happened?" Anyone else would have badgered me with questions 'til I gave in.

Jasper just looked out over the frozen lake. "I'm not here because I'm curious. I'm here to be here for you. And if you want to talk to me about it, I figure you will."

I sniffed and realized I had started crying again. "Jazz I wanted to kiss Jacob." I said it like a statement.

"And you didn't kiss him? Really? And I thought you were the kind of girl that if you wanted something you went out and got it." He said shaking his head.

I gaped at him. "How can you just say that?! Jake is my best friend! He is almost like a brother!"

Again Jasper shook his head. "No, Nessie you know this. Jake is not your brother. He has _never _been a brother to you." He looked at me. "Really have you ever thought of him as your brother?"

I shook my head with out a hesitation. "No." I whispered. But that's not what everyone else thought.

"Then what's the problem?" He asked raising one eyebrow at me.

I opened and closed my mouth several times but nothing came out. Was he insane!

"Look I'm not saying the second you we get back home you go up and kiss him. But don't let anything scar you out of something you want." He said looking back out over the lake.

I followed his gaze. I couldn't make myself ask the question about what the others would think. I didn't think I really wanted to know the answer.

"Renesmee, you should be happy. And if being with Jake is what will give you happiness; then you should go for it."

Wait! I didn't say anything about being _with_ Jake! All I said….I wanted to kiss Jake. Could I really do one with out the other?

Groaning I put my face in my hands. I wasn't getting anywhere!

I felt Jasper get up next to me. "Ok, enough thinking." He declared. "I want to see you in those new skates." He said smiling widely.

I looked up at him and laughed. I loved being around Jazz. He made me feel at ease, and not worry about things. Though that probably had to do with the fact that he could influence emotions. Quickly I slipped on the skates and stood up, they fit perfectly!

Then Jasper pulled out a second pair of skates out of no where, but they were black; and a couple sizes bigger than mine. He put his on and started out in front of me.

"Coming?" He asked turning around to look at me, skating backwards.

Feeling like a kid again I skated up to the middle of the lake. It had been far too long since I had been in skates. I glided up to the center of the lake and pushed myself into a tight spin. I spun faster and faster, giggling at the sensation running through me.

I stuck out my foot to and stopped myself. I skated up beside Jasper who was still skating backwards. "Thanks." I said quietly.

Jasper just nodded. He knew I meant it for more than just the new ice skates. "Anytime."

* * *

Jacob's POV

It had almost been an hour since Nessie had left my room; and I was still pacing.

What had happened? She had seemed good when she walked into the room, but then after she told me things were going to get better she started to faze out. What had triggered her to freeze on me? What had freaked her out?

I replayed our three minute conversation in my head for what must have been the hundredth time. But I still couldn't find what ever it was that made Nessie act so strangely.

Groaning I looked around my room, hoping that I would by some miracle find the answer. Maybe this was something that had to do with her being a girl. Weren't they supposed to get all moody when they're about seven or eight? I mean Rachel and Rebecca did! Maybe she's is hitting something like that and will just have to grow out of it.

But did I really believe that? No. This was something deeper. I just had no idea how to decode what that was. Why was it that girl's minds were wired so that a guy would _never_ be able to understand them?

Then idea occurred to me. A horrible idea! Terrible! Worst idea I've ever had! And that's saying something! That I even thought about it made me want to shoot myself. But actually doing it; it would be insane!

But it was the only idea I had. And I had to admit, I needed all the help I could get. Even if it did cost me all of my manhood.

So slowly, and unwillingly, I made my body move, which seemed harder to do at the moment, out of my room and down the stairs. I walked past Emmett who was sitting on the sofa right where he had been when I got home; and into the hallway leading to where I could hear Alice and Rosalie laughing about something.

I looked at the door with a grimace. Please kill me now; I thought to anyone who hopefully was listening. Sighing I lifted my fist and knocked on the door.

It was opened imminently by Alice, who was for once looking confused. "Yes?"

Dang it; this would have been easier if she had seen it coming first. "Can I come in?"

Alice's eyebrows shot up. "Why?"

Sighing in defeat I just spat it out. "I need some advice."

Alice's eyes looked like they were about to pop out of her head and Rose who I could see sitting on the bed mouth dropped open. Neither of them said anything for a minute and I waited for one of them to respond.

But they didn't. Emmett did. I heard a booming laughter from the other room, so loud I almost needed to cover my eyes. I rolled my eyes and looked down at Alice. "So are you going to let me in or not?" I asked starting to get agitated.

Blinking Alice stepped aside. "Um, sure." She said sharing a look with Rose.

Awkwardly I walked into the room and heard the door shut behind me.

It was the sound of my death sentence.

Not really sure if I should sit or stand or run I just stood in the middle of the room while Alice went to sit next to Rose on the bed in front of me.

"So what is it you want?" Rose asked, looking at me with piercing eyes.

"I already told you, please don't make me repeat it." I said trying not to sound cold. As much as I hated Rose, I need her girly insight. "Will you help me?"

Both where quiet for a moment before Alice said. "What is it you want to know?"

Finally getting somewhere! " Why is Nessie been acting like she has the past week?"

Rose answered. "How should we know?"

"Well you're a girl, and you all think alike." Why couldn't Rose just give me a straight answer?

Alice shook her head. "Yeah but you would need to be a mind reader who can get past her shield to know what's going in her head."

"Great." I muttered. I wasn't going to get anything out of them. I turned to go.

"But what about you?" Alice asked.

I turned back around and raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"

She shrugged. "Why have you been acting weird the past week?"

I stared at Alice. Why did she have to ask that?! "What do you mean?"

Rose snorted. "You know you're as bad a liar as Nessie!"

Rolling my eyes I shoved my hands into my pockets. I really didn't want to talk about me. But I knew if I tried to avoid the subject they wouldn't leave me alone 'til I told them everything. "I honestly don't know."

Again they both just stared at me. "What?"

Alice looked at me in disbelief. "Really? You honestly can't see that you're falling in love with her?"

Her word hit my face like a jack slap. I felt my mouth drop open and my eyes grow big. What? No. Did she really just say what I think she just said? _No._

"Really?! You don't see it?!" Alice said giggling. "But then again you are a guy and they can be so oblivious at times."

I tried to say something, though I have no idea what, but my mouth just opened and shut without a sound coming out.

Alice sighed and got to her feet. She walked up in front of me and put a hand on my arm, probably because she couldn't reach my shoulder. She looked at me with sympathy eyes "Jacob I've watched you and Renesmee since day one. I watched you love her like I've never seen anyone love. I guess that's what the imprint did. But Jake, you know about imprinting; is it really all that surprising that you would end up with Renesmee? I mean it's only natural!"

Suddenly it all came together. Everything I had been feeling, the different things I had been noticing. The way I stopped breathing around her. The way my hand felt warm with her's in it. How I thought of her every second I was away from her. The way she smiled, and laughed. The way she could still squeal like a little girl when she was excited. How she wasn't afraid to give her own opinion. How she could look you dead in the eyes even if she was scared.

And then a picture popped into my head; it was of Nessie and me. We were sitting in the snow, she was on my lap looking down at a little bundle in her arms smiling like I've never seen her smile before; the bundle was a baby. A tiny boy with white skin and black hair and light brown eyes. He looked just like us. In the picture I was looking over Nessie's shoulder at the boy smiling. I kissed Nessie on the cheek and she glowed with happiness.

Then it was over. And I wanted nothing more than to go back to that dream. It was perfect.

Shocked I realized how badly I wanted what was in that picture! How I wanted to hold Nessie like that, to see her glow and smile happily; and it to be because of me.

I wanted it more than I had ever wanted anything in my entire life! I felt the love for Nessie rushing through my veins. It was a wonderful feeling!

"I'm sure you have a lot to think about" Alice said. I had forgotten she was there. "You should go somewhere were your mind process."

I think I nodded; but I can't be sure. All I knew for sure was that I was walking out of Alice's room and that I was completely, unchangeable, impossibly in love with Renesmee Cullen.

* * *

**Hey! Hope everyone is having an awesome day! I am! God has really blessed me these past couple of days. He really amazes me some times! Anywho I hope you guys like the chapter. PLEASE review I like all the feed back I can get. Good and bad I want to thank () for pointing out that I was spell Emmett wrong! I'm such a loser! But thank you for pointing that out for me. Anywho, I will hopefully get to update soon. I've been lucky the past couple of days to get any writing done. So again please review and I'll try to have the next chapter up soon! God Bless!**


	12. Chapter 12 Hard Realizations

Jacob's POV

I walked numbly up to my room, barely noticing Emmett who was still chuckling at me. I sat on my bed and thought in wonder.

I love Renesmee Cullen.

I love Nessie.

The thought that I knew to be truer than anything in the world was so alien to me. I couldn't even think it without my heart racing.

I love Nessie!

Wow.

I couldn't believe I was able to sit still. I felt like I was a firecracker about to burst! This emotion was so overwhelming! It was rushing through out my entire body making me want to jump up and down and yell.

It was odd too. This knew feeling. It was so new, and I barely understood it, yet it felt right.

I love Nessie!

_Not_ being able to sit any longer I got up and not being able to think of anything else, I just paced back and forth the length of my room. I wondered what I should do now; all I wanted to do was tell Nessie. To get started on getting to that beautiful picture I had seen. So without thinking I ran out of my room and burst through Nessie's door, my heart pounding so loudly I was sure everyone in the house could hear it. But she wasn't in there. In fact, I didn't hear her heart beat in the house at all. When did she leave?

I walked slowly back to my room. Why did she leave? Did she leave because of whatever had happened earlier?

Then a thought occurred to me, knocking the breath out of my lungs! I tried to suck in a breath; but the air wouldn't come. My heart felt like someone was trying to tear it out of my chest!

What if Nessie had figured it out? What if that's why she had left so suddenly? What if she realized that I was falling in love with her and she was disgusted by it?! I staggered to my bed and sat on it, looking down at my hands.

I felt the tearing in my chest as my heart was completely ripped from me. That's why she left. She saw that I was in love with her and was sickened; probably confused too. But how could I blame her; she saw me as her best friend; as her brother. That's what I had always been.

Finally I sucked in a little air; my breathing coming in little bursts. I felt broken. I felt as though my whole life was falling apart. What was wrong with me? How could I let myself do this!

How?! I'm Nessie's imprint! I'm supposed to be whatever she wants. Not whatever I want! Taking in a deep breath I slid to the floor, leaning against the side of my bed. This wasn't supposed to happen.

But I couldn't change that now. It was too late. I was in love with her.

What was I supposed to do now? How was I supposed to act? What was going to happen when I saw Nessie again? Would she stay away from me?

No!

I just wouldn't allow this to get in the way of our friendship.

_Friendship?_ I had never thought that was a bad word; but now it seemed like a kick to the gut.

But that's what I would have to settle with. Because if I didn't what would happen? I shuddered at the thought. Nessie wouldn't even want me to be around her.

No.

That couldn't happen. I didn't care if I had to shut this new found love away in the darkest part of myself. I wouldn't let this ruin things between Nessie and me. Because no matter how much being _friends_ didn't seemed to be enough, I couldn't live if I messed things between us anymore. I had to have her in my life.

I couldn't live without her.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I don't know how long we stayed. I couldn't keep track of time out here. It was so magical. I skated around the pond so many times I lost count. So many times it should have gotten old, would have gotten old if I were a sane person! But I loved every moment of it!

I didn't have to think when I skated. I just did it and enjoyed the nothingness inside my head.

But after some time Jasper called out to me saying we should start back. I was surprised to see that it had suddenly grown dark. Nodding I went back to the rock where we had sat earlier and took off my ice skates. Once off I tied the laces together and slung them over my left shoulder and went to where Jasper was waiting for me at the far end of the clearing, his own skates done the same way.

"Ready?" He asked when I reached him. I nodded and he smiled before starting to run. I followed him, keeping up easily; I was my father's daughter after all. We ran through woods for a while, dodging small bushes and fallen over trees. When we came to a brake in the trees we could see the house in the distance, down in the valley below us. I looked down at it in wonder. It really was a castle. It stood in the middle of the white space like a statue that was set apart from all the rest of the museum because of its extraordinariness. It's tall towers stretching into the sky.

We were getting ready to run down to the house when I remembered something. "Jasper?" He turned to look at me. "Um, I was just wondering if you know, if you could try not to think about our conversation?"

Jasper gave me a puzzled look. "What conversation? I don't remember having one." He said giving me a wink.

I giggled. "Thank you."

We ran down into the valley and up to the house. Jasper stopped just outside the front door and gave me a questioning look. I knew he wanted to make sure I was ok. I smiled and nodded.

Jasper walked inside and I was right behind him. My feet were starting to get cold and I wanted to get in front one of those fire places.

"Jasper!" Alice called happily. I wondered if she saw what had happened in the field. I hadn't even thought about that! Alice ran up to Jasper and threw her arms around his neck. "Where did you go? I was starting to get really worried!"

I guess that answers my question.

Jasper put his arms around Alice and kissed her on the forehead before saying. "I just thought I would give Nessie her birthday present early." He said smoothly. I couldn't believe how smoothly he lied. To Alice none the less! "I just couldn't wait until her actual birthday. I was far too excited about it."

Alice giggled. "Sorry. That was probably my fault." She looked at me. "He told me about it when he found the lake while out hunting, and I've been really wanting to see your reaction!"

"But didn't you see my reaction in a vision?"

She laid her head on Jasper's chest. "Well of course! But Jake was there and I couldn't see you very clearly."

"Oh." That explained a lot. "Are any of the fire places going?" I asked.

"Yep, on the third floor." Alice replied.

I nodded and headed for the stairs. I faintly heard Alice suggest that her and Jasper should go for a _long walk_ somewhere they could spend some _alone_ time together. I giggled and ran up the stairs two at a time.

* * *

Sighing I rested my head on my folded arms. I hopped Miss Kim wouldn't notice me. I was just so tired I couldn't really care. I hadn't seen Jake at all last night after I got back home with Jasper. I didn't know what to think; maybe he was upset with me. I barely slept at all. I rolled around for hours, unable to find a comfortable position to sleep in. I kept thinking I needed to talk to Jake. But I didn't know what about. And then when I saw him this morning I knew imminently that something was wrong. He had a fake smile plastered to his face; and he didn't ask about why I had suddenly left his room the night before.

He didn't really say that much on the ride to school either. Though I think I did catch him looking in my direction, but what really confused me was that when I did, he looked like he was in pain. Or upset. Or something.

But when I asked him about it he played dumb. He also had light rings under his eyes, as if he hadn't slept well either.

Sighing to myself I lifted my head again. I tried to keep my eyes open; though I wasn't sure I was succeeding. I was thankful when I heard the bell ring ending class. Though I nearly fell out of my seat when it did. I shoved my book into my bag and got to my feet.

"Hey Renesmee, you ok?" I heard from beside me ask and felt someone put a hand on my lower back.

I looked up and saw Garret. I nodded. "Yeah, just didn't get a lot of sleep last night." I said stifling a yawn

I wasn't sure how I felt about his hand which was still on my back. "Are you sure? You look a little light headed."

I opened my mouth to speak when I caught Jake's face before he swiftly left the class room. His face had been blank, like a wall, but his eyes, they shouted out in pain.

Without even giving Garret another thought I ran out after Jake. I looked around, but I didn't see him. I started out toward the cafeteria, that's where we were going anyway. And if there was one thing you could be sure of, it was that Jake never missed a meal.

I walked as quickly as I could without actually running to the cafeteria. I couldn't help but feel a tightening in my gut as I moved through the crowd. I just knew something wasn't right. As usual, everyone was waiting at the door. But Jake wasn't with them. My head started spinning.

"Hey sweetie," Alice said looking around. "where is Jacob?" She asked.

I shook my head. "I don't know, I thought he might be coming here." I looked around as well. Why did he just run off like that? Where would he have gone? I could feel myself starting to panic.

"Come on lets get inside." Dad said putting a hand on my shoulder. "He probably just went to the bathroom or to get some fresh air." He said trying to be reassuring. That meant he knew something; Alice must have had a vision.

I nodded; though I knew that wasn't what happened. There had been pain in his eyes. Though his face had been a perfect mask of indifference, his eyes had pure pain in them.

I only got a Dr. Pepper bottle in the lunch line; mom gave me a worried look but didn't say anything. I sat in between her and Jasper. I knew Jasper was trying to calm me down, but I couldn't help but feel a little panicky. Jake had never disappeared before. What had made him do it now? I couldn't think of anything! But if I ever find what made Jacob experience such pain I swear I am going to destroy it!

* * *

Jacob's POV

My heart pounded in my chest as I walked down the stairs to the second floor.

I was going to see Nessie.

I hadn't been able to sleep at all last night; the idea of seeing Nessie the next day wouldn't leave me. Even though I had decided to be only friends with her; my heart didn't seem to care. It still pounded just at the thought of her.

Everyone but Nessie and Bella were already in the living room. I didn't think I could sit so I went and stood by the stairs leading to the first floor. We didn't have to wait long, a minute and 7 seconds later I heard Nessie's bedroom door close and their footsteps as they walked along the hall and finally down the stairs. My heart beating faster with every step she took. Then she came into view.

And my heart stopped.

She was wearing a pair of tight black pants and a white sweater. Her hair was curlier than usual and fell down around her shoulders, framing her perfect face.

My heart jump started; going a mile a second. I took in a deep breath. She was so beautiful. It should be illegal to be that beautiful!

My eyes traced over every inch of her face. Her smooth forehead; to her small brown eyebrows, her light eyes, and the dark circles under them.

She hadn't slept well. I knew that she hadn't, I had heard her tossing and turning all night. She hadn't fell asleep 'til well after four. But why? Was it because of me? Because she knew I had fallen for her and the thought stressed her out? She had no way of knowing what I had decided. She didn't know that I wasn't going to press my feeling on her.

Feeling horrible I started down the stairs before anyone else had even gotten up. I went straight to Edward's car and leaned against the back door. A couple minutes later the rest of the family filed out and piled into the car they would be riding in.

I opened the door for Nessie, letting her hop in first. "Good morning." She said quietly.

I shut the door once I was seated. "Good morning." was my only reply.

I sat in silence for the rest of the ride; trying my hardest to not think about anything that had happened last night. Finally I just started quoting some of my favorite line from movies. After a minute Edward looked at me through his mirror with raised eyebrows. I just ignored him and kept quoting.

It was going to be such a long day.

But I would do it. I would be a friend to Nessie. Because that was what she wanted.

I could do this for her.

* * *

I made it through the first two classes without any problems. I mean besides the not concentrating on anything but Nessie's heart beat next to me, or the not being able to stop myself from glancing in Nessie direction every couple of minutes or the fact that my heart kept ripping itself over and over again; as I thought about the picture I had seen while talking to Alice and Rose. Seeing something I so desperately wanted, but would never have. But besides that; everything was going good.

I saw Nessie lay her head down on her arms with a sigh. She looked really tired. All through class she had been forcing her eyes to stay open. I could tell. They didn't have their normal sparkle.

I felt guilt wash over me. It was my fault that she was so tired.

And then I felt bad for myself. In about five minutes I have learned I loved Nessie, realized she found that love repulsive and broke my heart into so many pieces I wouldn't have known the thing aching in my chest was a heart if it weren't for the fact it beat so violently when I was near Nessie.

When the bell rang I saw Nessie nearly fall out of her seat from shock. I shove my book in my bag and headed for the door. When I heard:

"Hey Renesmee, you ok?" Garret asked, I turned and saw him putting his hand on the small of Nessie's back. His eyes traveled over her body.

Nessie looked up at him. "Yeah, just didn't get a lot of sleep last night." I knew that.

"Are you sure? You look a little light headed." Garret asked. I wanted nothing more than to go over to him and rip his arm off. Why didn't he just leave Nessie alone?

_But what if she doesn't want him to?_ Some part of my brain thought. I looked at them in horror.

No.

I couldn't stay and watch any more. I ran out of the room, almost running at werewolf speed. I ran as fast as a human could out of the school building not caring that I was shoving past people, and kept on running. I ran past the gym, past the football stadium, and into the woods surrounding the backside of the school. I ran through the trees, for I don't know how long; 'til I reached the other end of the woods. I was looking out towards some mountains.

I looked around hopelessly, and fell to my knees where I was.

It wasn't possible. Was it?

He is just a human boy! She couldn't really want anything to do with him?

_That's what everyone said about Edward and Bella. Are you saying Nessie is all that different from her parents?_

"SHUT UP!" I half yelled half growled at the sky. I didn't want to hear it!

Manly because: it was true. She was a lot like her parents. My breathing turned into pants. The thought of her with that human was like being kicked over and over again.

What if she did like this human boy? What if she ended up falling in love with him? Would she turn him? The thought of spending eternity with Nessie _and_ her lover made me sick.

I had to do something. I couldn't just sit here! Getting up I grabbed the first thing I saw, a tree, and yanked on it. The sound on crackling ground and roots being torn from the ground echoed through the air. I pulled it free from the ground and turned around and slung it with all my might in the direction of the mountains. I saw it fly through the air with such speed I soon lost sight of it.

I could see my breath come out of my mouth in little puffs of heat. I stared in the direction I had thrown the tree. I had to get a grip on myself.

I hadn't even thought about someone hearing the noise I would make. And I needed to think about that sort of thing; otherwise I might end up doing something really stupid.

But what was I going to do about Garret?

_Nothing._ _Why would a best friend object to something Nessie wants? Why would a brother stop Nessie from being happy?_

I couldn't do anything. I was going to be Nessie's best friend; like I should be. I would be happy for her. I would watch from the sidelines; making sure who ever she ended up with wouldn't hurt her. That be Garret or someone else. I wouldn't interfere.

I wouldn't.

* * *

My way back I moved slower, I wasn't in that big of a hurry. I had only been gone for about 20 minutes. I just missed lunch that's all. But I wasn't hungry anyway.

By the time I got back onto the school grounds I had about ten minutes before the bell would ring. Not really wanting to go to the lunch room for such a short amount of time; not really wanting to face Nessie yet, I went to my locker instead got my books changed out and went to Biology. No one was in the room yet; not even Mrs. Nickles.

I took my seat and pulled out my book. With nothing better to do I opened it and started reading what we would be going over today.

When I looked up next I saw that several of the seats had been filled and Mrs. Nickles was writing something on the dry-erase board at the front of the classroom. A few minutes later and the whole room was filled; including the seat next to me.

"So Jake, do you like have a date for the dance coming up after the break?" Miley asked.

I sighed and answered without looking up. "No."

"Really?!" She asked excited. "I would have thought you would have already asked someone, this close to the dance and all." I rolled my eyes. The dance was over a month away. I would have had plenty of time. If I even thought I was going.

"Well I've been asked by like five different guys already. But I turned them all down." She said paused, like she was trying to imply something. "They just weren't who I wanted to go with." Another pause. "But I mean if this guy I want to ask me doesn't hurry up and ask me I'm going to say yes to someone else. I just can't say no to _everyone._"

I continued to stair down at my book. I let her keep on chattering about how flattering it was to be asked over and over again by all these different guys. I paid enough attention so I could nod my head at the right time.

Needless to say I was thankful when the class started.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I hurried out of history, saying a quick 'Bye' to mom and dad before rushing down the hallway. I had already told Bethany that I would meet her in the gym. I ran 'til I was outside of Mrs. Nickles classroom and stopped. I hoped that Jake would come out of that door. I was bouncing up and down from nerves by the time I saw Jake's tall form walk through the doorway.

"Jacob!" I couldn't help myself I ran up to him to throw my arms around him when I saw he wasn't alone. A girl I hadn't seen before was standing next to him talking a mile a minute. I stopped four steps away from them.

The girl didn't even seem to notice me. But Jake had heard me call his name and looked down at me surprised. "What's up?" He asked. He turned to the other girl. "I'll see you later." He said before walking up next to me with raised eye brows.

I looked over my shoulder at the girl he had been talking to; she was wearing a very revealing sweater and tight jeans a black coat hanging over her arm; and she was beaming at the back of Jacob's head.

"Nessie?" I looked up. Jake was still looking down at me. "Is everything ok?"

Coming back to reality I gaped at him. He was really asking me this!? When he was the one who disappeared for a whole hour!? "You're kidding right?" He had to be joking!

He still looked confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Where did you go?!" I asked loudly.

"Oh." Yeah oh! Jeeze what did he think I was talking about?

"Well?"

He shrugged. "I wasn't really feeling all that hungry, so I just decided to walk around for a bit."

"Are you serious?"

He nodded. I can't believe this! Suddenly feeling mad and hurt I threw my hand out, making contact with Jake's face. I hit him so hard it turned his face to the side.

"OW!" He yelped, clearly shocked. A couple people walking near by turned to see what was going on, but I didn't care. "What was that for?"

"_What was that for?!_ You disappear for an hour, not telling anyone where you are going, when you'll be back and you have to ask '_what was that for'_?!" I nearly screamed at him. "I was worried sick about you! I thought something had happened! I mean one minute you're there and the next minute you're gone!" I had stopped walking now and was staring at Jake. "Would it have been so hard to tell me; so that I don't have a freaking heart attack?" I asked my voice now lower than a whisper.

Jacob looked stunned. "Nessie! I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to make you worry. I just wasn't hungry that's all." He looked down at me, his face full of guilt and self loathing. "I'm so, so sorry. Please, I didn't mean to worry you."

I stared up at him for another moment then nodded my head. I knew he didn't mean to worry me. But still, he could have just told me! Would that really have been that hard?

"It's ok." I said after a minute. "Just please don't do that ever again?"

He nodded. "Sure thing."

I sighed and looked up. Everyone in the hallway was looking at us. Oh boy. Now they were really going to have something to gossip about.

* * *

"Hey Renesmee!" I looked behind me and saw Garret wearing his gym clothes walking towards me, pulling someone by the arm behind him.

"Hi Garret; what's up?" I asked pushing some hair out of my eyes.

"I just wanted to introduce my friend to you;" He said pulling the guy he had been holding, rather tightly I noticed, by the arm forward. The boy stumbled a little and nearly fell on top of me.

I caught the guy by the shoulder, but heard something clatter to the ground. "I'm s-sorry!" He stuttered, his face turning red. I recognized him from somewhere, but I couldn't quite place where. I looked down to see what had hit the floor and picked up a pair of black rimmed glasses.

"I think you dropped these." I said handing them to the boy.

He took them and placed them on his face. Where had I seen him? "Thank you." He mumbled looking down at his feet.

"Sure sure. I'm Renesmee Cullen." I said holding out my hand. "And you would be?"

He guy took my hand and opened his mouth to speak but Garret cut him off. "This is my friend Justin Larkin." He said throwing his arm around Justin's neck. Now I remembered! I had seen him my second day of school sitting next to Garret.

"Oh! It's nice to meet you." I said pulling my hand back. I liked the way Justin didn't try to hold it longer than necessary. "I hear you moved here from Georgia a couple years back."

Again Justin wasn't the one that spoke. "Yep! That's right. Anyway I just wanted to introduce you two." Leaning closer to me, but not letting go of Justin as if afraid he might run off or something if he did, Garret said quietly. "He's been asking me to for a while now; thought I'd give him a break."

I'm not sure why, but that didn't seem right. Something about the way Justin was standing, the way he seemed to be trying to lean away from Garret made it seem as if Justin didn't want to be here at all.

"Ok. Well I've got to go get changed; Jake is probably waiting for me." I said. "It was really nice to meet you Justin." I gave him the best smile I could; I wasn't sure why, but I really like Justin. He didn't seem like the other boys who liked to gawk at me and the rest of my family. I got a small smile back before I turned and headed for the locker room to change.

I walked up to my locker and started pulling my navy blue long sleeved shirt off.

"That was so much fun!" Bethany said suddenly beside me. Really some times I didn't know where she came from.

"Yeah, I mean if you like running 'til your legs fall off." I said snickering. Over half of the girls in the class nearly died when they found out we would be running sprints.

"But I don't think you minded." Bethany said lifting one eyebrow. "You seemed to enjoy it."

I shrugged. I mean being a half vampire I loved to run, though most vampires would think what we had just done was more like moving in slow motion. "Yeah, I like running."

"You should try out for the track team! I think you would be fabulous!" She said bouncing up and down.

Yeah, she wouldn't say that if she knew what I was. I mean who wants to play with someone who can win every match. "Naw, it's just not my cup of tea." I said pulling my black pants on.

"And why not? If you like running then you should run!" She said. "I mean unless you have some superpower like Flash; then I would understand." She eyed my face closely. "You don't happen to be able to run at the speed of light; do you? I mean because if you did then I would understand, not wanting to be temped to run a little faster than humanly possible and all."

I nearly choked on air. "What?! No."

"Oh." She said sounding disappointed.

"What? You don't really believe in that kind of stuff?" My eyes grew wide when she didn't answer. "Do you? I mean believe there was once a man that could move as fast as lighting?"

Bethany looked me in the eyes. "Well how else do you think those people came up with those comics?!" She said as if it was obvious.

"They could have used their imaginations." I tried pointing out. I wanted to laugh. How was it I had somehow found maybe the only person on earth who thought there was such things as super humans? And she was now friends with a half vampire!

"Oh yeah right! You give the human mind way too much credit!" She said with a laugh. "No, someone must have seem them; and then told the stories to their kids, and them to their kids and on and on 'til someone decided to write it into a comic." She said in a matter-a-fact tone. "There is just no way a simple human could have come up with something so fantastic!"

I couldn't help myself; I laughed. "You know what maybe you're right. Maybe there are people with powers all around us just trying to blend in and be normal." This was just too funny! Bethany believed in supernatural beings! And here she was talking to one without even knowing it!

"Yep! That's how I see the world, full of amazing things we don't even notice!" Bethany said as we walked out of the lock room.

We walked up to Jake, who was waiting by the door as always, I told Bethany I'd see her tomorrow and Jake and I walked out of the building.

Neither of us said anything as we walked to the parking lot. I clasped my hands behind my back as we walked, not really sure what to do, or say. It really made me sad, this was Jacob! It had never been like this before.

Before what? Of that I wasn't sure. But I wanted things to go back to normal!

I looked sideways at Jake, his face was slightly pink, I realized shocked, from where I had slapped him.

Clearing my throat I said. "I'm sorry I hit you."

Jake's head snapped up. "What? Oh! No don't worry about!" He said sounding a little panicked. "I deserved it."

I don't know what was different, but something was in the way he was talking to me. And I didn't like it. "No. I shouldn't have hit you."

"It's ok." He said.

We walked to the car not saying anything else. But no one was in the car yet so we had to wait outside. I leaned against the back door. I could hardly believe that not too long ago I had been leaning against this very car, in this parking lot with Jake's arms around me; holding me close to him.

I wished he would do that now. But he didn't; he stood at the front of the car looking off into the distance.

What had happened to make him like this? Why did it suddenly seem like he was thousands of miles away; even when I could see him right there? Where had this rift come? How had it started?

It hadn't really gotten bad 'til last night. But what happened? What was different about last night?

_You wanted to kiss him._

But he didn't know about tha- my brain shut down.

No.

Then turned back on at full blast! My thought went loudly around my brain.

_What do you mean 'he didn't know'? Oh course he did! It was written all over your face! The longing to be with him in that way you shouldn't feel. And he saw it!_

I nearly whimpered. He knew I wanted to kiss him. That must have been it! Nothing else happened. And being the nice guy he is, unable to hurt my feelings, he couldn't tell me that he didn't see me like that.

He imprinted on me for pete-sake! He was supposed to be my best friend forever!

Nothing more.

Gosh I was so stupid! How could I put Jake in that position! How could I want to kiss him and then make him feel all weird around me!? I mean he had to stay with me, since he imprinted on me, and I was just making that weird for him!

Feeling awful I slumped against the side of the car trying to ignore the sharp pain I felt in my chest when I thought of Jake not wanting anything more than to be friends. It was stupid for me to feel that way. There was nothing I could do to change anything about it.

I was glad when dad and mom walked to the car and hopped in. I was getting ready to slide in myself with I caught Jasper looking between both Jake and I. He raised an eyebrow at me.

I shook my head and tried not to think about how he knew what I was feeling. A moment later I felt Jasper's touch on my emotions trying to ease my stress, confusion, and sadness. I welcomed it with open arms.

I closed my tired eyes as we drove out of the school parking lot, still feeling Jasper's influence over me. I tried my best not to think while I rode, my eyes shut the whole way.

And I must say I did a good job; if by falling asleep counts.

"Renesmee! You're going to want to wake up now!" I heard Alice screech.

I opened my eyes for the first time since we left school and gasped.

Standing in the doorway of the house was Kate!

* * *

**Hey everyone! Praying everyone is doing awesome! So I know a bunch of you aren't really going to like this chapter; I don't really like this chapter! But it is what it is...sad as that may be. Because I love Jake and think out of everyone in the books he should be happiest! So writing this was hard. And I need feed back; on how well it was written; and if you must about how none of you like this chapter in general. (unless you don't like Jacob and are a Edward fan; but if that were the case I don't know why you would be reading this story in the first place....but whatever...) ANYWHO, please review! I'm _BEGGING_ you! REVIEW!!!! But if you don't it's ok. Well I'll try and have another chapter up soon! I'll be back home on Wednesday! So I think that's it, God Bless!**


	13. Chapter 13 Hey Kate is Here!

Renesmee's POV

"Oh my gosh!" I said, almost sounding like Alice. Wow scary thought. But I couldn't really care! Kate was here!

"That's right; you'd better be excited! I left a bunch of yummy looking grizzlies to be here!" Kate said running to meet me. I threw my arms around her neck and she swung me around once before setting me back on the ground. "Wow girly you've gotten a lot bigger since the last time I saw you!"

I laughed. "Yeah, but you can get used to seeing me like this! I'm all grown up now!" I said happily. I could feel my wide smile. "I've missed you! Why haven't you come and visited me?" I said pouting slightly.

"Oh come on it wasn't that long ago. I saw you only two years ago." Kate said taking my hand and pulling me towards the house.

I huffed. "Exactly! Two _years_ ago!" Kate pulled me into the living room on the first floor and we sat down on the couch. I had missed seeing her. I had really become close to Kate; kind of like a best friend that wasn't family, or Jake. She had even sent me a birthday present every year. She was also the one that got me into photography. She had bought me my first camera and had told me everything I would ever have to know about taking pictures. I had really gone through a 'picture taking' faze when I was about 12 looking.

She shrugged. "That's not a very long time."

"Well it felt like a long time." I said putting my arm through her's and resting my head on her shoulder.

"So what are you doing here Kate?" Dad asked settling next to mom on the loveseat across from Kate and me.

Kate smirked. "Hello to you too Edward."

Dad chuckled. "Sorry; I wasn't sure I was going to get a chance to say anything with the way Renesmee is talking, but when I did I thought that I should ask the question everyone else was thinking."

Kate rolled her eyes. "Yes well you would know that wouldn't you." She sighed. "I just told Tanya that I was coming home early to meet you guys. I wanted to see you too much to wait another two weeks." She said and rustled my hair. "Especially you!"

I laughed and ran a hand through my hair hoping it wasn't sticking out anywhere. "Do you want to see my room?!" I asked; hoping she wouldn't think I was being childish. It was just my room was really awesome!

Kate nodded. "You bet!"

Getting to my feet I grabbed Kate's hand and started up the stairs. Once on the second floor I paused. "This is the 'kid's' living room." I said. "And if you're ever looking for Emmett that is where you would find him." I pointing to the couch on one side of the room where Emmett was indeed sitting playing something on the X-Box 360. "Emmett, say 'hi' to Kate."

Not even turning away from the screen Emmett waved and said. "Hi Kate."

Shaking my head I went on. "Mom and dad's room is that way; along with the game room. And Alice's and Rosalie's rooms are down that way." I said pointing in different directions while I spoke. I ran up the next flight of stairs. "This is mine and Jake's floor." I said and headed off to the hallway and into my room. I opened the door. "Ta-da!"

Kate stepped in and looked around, clearly impressed. "Not too shabby." She said with an approving nod.

I laughed. "Yeah, I think I could defiantly do worse."

We made our way back down stairs where everyone was sitting around waiting for a chance to talk with Kate. Even grandma and grandpa were waiting.

"So how is the rest of the clan doing?" Grandma asked sitting on grandpa in a big overstuffed chair.

"They are well. They should be getting back two weeks from this Wednesday. I know Carmen is going to want to through a party together when they get back. She almost came with me, but Eleazar wanted to hunt longer so she stayed with him. But she is really looking forward to seeing you again." Kate said smiling.

"We want to see them as well. And I'm sure we could arrange some sort of get together." Grandpa said.

We spent the next two hours talking about the party we were going to have; Alice did most of that talking. But it was fun and light, everyone was smiling and laughing; just enjoying Kate's company.

There was only one person who didn't join in with the conversation; besides Emmett who was still playing the X-Box 360 upstairs. Jacob. He stood off to the side leaning against a wall looking out the window with a far off expression. I tried not to think about it and just laugh along with everyone else, but I couldn't help it as my mind kept turning back to him. I wanted very much to just go over and hug him around his middle.

But I wasn't sure if I should or not. I didn't want to give him the wrong idea. I didn't want him to think that I was trying to do something. Like kiss him.

Because I wasn't going to do that. I had already decided that. I was just going to forget I ever felt that.

It just seemed a little harder to forget than I thought it would be.

This sucked! I heard a cough, looking up I met Jasper's questioning eyes. I shook my head. Back to my thoughts: This sucked! I couldn't even hug my best friend, couldn't hold his hand anymore, could I even pat him on the back?

This was crazy! Jake was my best friend; friends should be allowed to hug! But I didn't want to give him the wrong idea. I didn't want to make him uncomfortable.

I tried to concentrate on the conversation more; not really wanting to think about how messed up things had gotten between Jake and I.

"Where were you hunting?" Grandpa asked rubbing his hand slowly up and down grandma's arm.

"We went to South America. We actually went there to visit some friends of ours."

"Really? And did you find them?" Grandpa asked looking very curious.

Kate nodded, smiling brightly. "Yes we did! And I must say I forgot how interesting they were."

Grandpa nodded in agreement. "That's good. And are these friends vegetarians?"

Kate nodded. "Yes. It is a small coven, it's only two of them and they are really good people."

Grandpa started asking a couple more questions about Kate's friends; and as try as I might I couldn't help as my mind strayed back to Jake.

* * *

A while later I was starting to get drowsy; I could feel my eyelids getting heavier, getting harder to open with every blink. But I didn't want to fall asleep. I didn't want to let my mind wander. Because when I was asleep I couldn't control my mind. And I thought of things, like kissing Jake when I dreamed. I didn't want to dream of that. Because it hurt when I woke up.

"Honey I think you should head up to bed." Kate said softly.

I opened my eyes that I hadn't realized had been closed. "No! I'm fine!" I didn't want to go to sleep. Besides Kate would be going back home soon and I wanted to spend as much time with her as I could.

"But you're falling asleep sitting up." She said chuckling.

"I'm not going to bed. I don't want to miss anything you're going to say once I do." I knew I was being dumb. I was so tired I knew I wouldn't be able to stay awake much longer. But I knew Kate would be gone in the morning. And I hadn't gotten a chance to talk to her about all that was going on between Jake and me yet.

Sighing in defeat Kate gently pulled me down so I was lying on the couch, my head on her lap. "Fine, but you have to lay right here if you're going to be stubborn." I nodded. I didn't mind this. I heard Kate snort. "Just like your father."

I smiled to myself as Kate started running her fingers through my hair. Just the way mom does. I listened for a little while longer before Kate's words started to get slower and slower, and meshing together so they were hard to understand; my last thought before I drifted off into unconsciousness was that I hoped I didn't dream of kissing Jake.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I stood by the window listening to Kate talk to the rest of the family. I was looking at the window, not out it but at it. Because I could see Nessie's reflection on it. This way I could look at her, watch her and not have to worry about being caught. Though I was sure Edward knew. But there wasn't anything I could do about that.

I watched her face as Kate told her she should go to bed and saw the light worry lines that appeared on her forehead, no one else seemed to notice them though.

I wondered why she didn't want to go to sleep. Probably because Kate was here any she wanted to spend time with her.

Finally after bantering back and forth for a bit Kate made Nessie lay down on the couch, her head on Kate's lap. They continued to talk, except Nessie who, by the sound of her heart beat wouldn't be awake much longer.

I didn't pay any attention to the conversation; I listened as Nessie's heart beat slower and slower 'til it became a steady rhythm. I couldn't believe how amazing the sound was. I breathed in a deep breath, catching Nessie's scent, though it was mixed in with the others I could still make it out. It soothed my nerves. Today had been interesting. I had never been hit by Nessie before. (unless you count that time she threw that stuffed bear at me when she found me looking around her room for my Christmas present she had hidden somewhere.) And today she had hit me _hard_. To say the least it shocked me. And it hurt. If I had been human my face probably would have been crushed.

Sighing I looked at Nessie through the reflection. She was now peacefully sleeping. Her chest moved up and down as she breathed. Her face was in clear view since Kate was brushing Nessie's hair back, it was perfect; her face was alight with calm, and her mouth was in a small smile like she was dreaming something pleasant.

I thought about taking her hand and watching her dreams, but I didn't know if that would be right, in front of so many people that didn't know you _could_ see Nessie's dreams. I decided I wouldn't. There was something nice knowing something about Nessie that no one else knew about. It left a pleasant feeling in my stomach.

I was debating whether to stay here and watch Nessie sleep or go up to my room and sulk, when Kate was suddenly standing in front of me. I looked over to the couch and saw Nessie was still there, only Bella was where Kate had been a second before. "We need to talk." She said and took me by the wrist and dragged me out the front door.

After we'd gone a little ways I was really starting to wonder what was going on. "Um, are you going to actually talk to me or are you just going to drag me around for an hour?"

She didn't answer imminently, but kept on walking. Finally after another couple of minutes she let go of my wrist and turned on to me. "What is going on?" She asked staring me down.

Now I was really confused. "I don't know? I figured you had the plan since you're the one who brought me out here."

Kate rolled her eyes. "Don't be smart with me Jacob. What is going on between you and Nessie?"

Oh boy. Why was it that _everybody_ could see that there was something happening between us? It was unnerving. "Nothing." It was the truth, in a way. Nothing was going to change; everything was going back to normal. No matter how much I disliked that.

"_Right?_" She said with raised eyebrows. "You really think I'm an idiot? I mean the minute I saw Nessie I knew something was wrong; then when I saw you I knew something had happened. So?"

Why wouldn't people just drop this!? Bringing it up again and again to talk about it wasn't going to help it. It just poured more salt on the hole in my heart. "Kate, really nothing is wrong. There was a little misunderstanding, but it's ok now. I figured it out and am now fixing it." I said in a gruff voice.

Kate looked me in the face for some time. Then she nodded, as if she had just added two plus two together and got: Jake is in love with Nessie and Nessie isn't in love with Jake. "Alright." She said kindly. "I believe you." She studied my face for another minute. "But Jake, if you hurt her, I will tear you apart limb by limb." She said softly, sympathetic even, but I knew she meant it.

"I know; and if that happens, I won't fight back." I said before turning back towards the house.

* * *

Kate walked back to the house imminently after our talk, but I lagged behind wanting time to think to myself.

I knew Kate's threat to me was true, that she wouldn't hesitate to bite my head off if I hurt Nessie; and I appreciated that. Even if I would never hurt Nessie, it was nice to know she had a good enough friend to do something like that if something ever happened.

Speaking of which, I needed to decide what to do about our predicament. Mine and Nessie's. I had told Kate I was going to fix this; but truthfully I wasn't really sure how. Obviously I would have to tell Nessie that I was willing to go back to being friends. If she still wanted me.

I didn't let my mind wonder what would happen if she didn't want to be my friend after this. Would it really surprise me? I'd seen the best of friends be separated because of love. Though most of those were on The O.C. and One Tree Hill; shows Nessie had insisted we watch when she was about eleven looking.

But like I said, I didn't let myself think about it.

So I would have to let Nessie know all I wanted was to be her friend. But how do I tell her something like that? How do I even bring it up?

I went through a few different scenarios in my head, but they all crashed and burned.

Groaning I walked up the four steps to the front door of the house and walked in. Kate was again sitting on the couch only now Nessie was gone and Alice was sitting next to Kate. By the sound of Alice's voice I would bet they were planning a shopping trip. I hoped for Nessie's sake they didn't drag her along too.

I had just shut the door behind me when Emmett came down the stairs and walked up to Rose who was sitting on a large high back chair. As he walked into the room his eyes landed on Kate.

He smiled widely. "Hey Kate's here!" He just about shouted in delight. "When did Kate get here?" He asked looking around the room confused.

I couldn't help but chuckle.

Rose looked at Emmett with an amused face. "Really Emmett you should pay more attention. You even said hi to her earlier."

Emmett looked like he was trying to think really hard. "I have no memory such a thing."

Rose just laughed and kissed his cheek. "Of course you don't."

Everyone in the room was chuckling as I walked up the stairs and out of the room. I still had a lot of thinking to do.

* * *

Kate left a couple hours later, leaving the house back to its quiet self.

I wasn't really sure what to do. It was about 10:00pm, I didn't want to go to sleep. That was too painful. I didn't want to dream about things that could never happen. I wandered around the house for a while. Not really paying attention where I was going; just doing anything that would keep my mind off the tiredness of my eyes.

Somehow I ended up in a back garden. I hadn't even known we had one. It was inside a glass room outside the back door with stone floors and long wooden tables holding different plants. All in different colors and shapes. I was walking through one of the rows when I heard someone walk into the room.

"Out of the entire house I hadn't thought to look here." Esme said chuckling.

I shrugged, not turning towards her. She could read me too well, and I didn't feel like talking about Nessie. Again. "I kind of stumbled in here." I said leaning down to look at a rather spectacular looking flower. "I didn't even know this room was here. I'm guessing it's yours."

"Yes. I love plants and I love watching them grow." Esme said; I could hear her as she started walking around the room her steps echoing on the stone. "And I really enjoy all the different colors. I had no idea there were so many colors until I started to grow plants."

I sighed and kept looking at the plant in front of me. "Why were you looking for me?" I already knew the answer but I thought I would ask, just to get it out in the air.

"I was wondering if you were going to be eating tonight?" She said catching me off guard. "I could make you something."

I snorted. Sometimes I forgot how amazing Esme was. Standing back up I turned to face her. "You know I think you're the only one who wanted to know anything besides what's going on between me and Nessie." I commented.

She just shrugged. "I'm not going to say that I'm not curious." Esme said with a smile. "But I know you haven't been eating well the past couple of days. And I figured that there were plenty of people fixing the other issue, so I thought I'd work on this one."

"You don't need to fix anything. I just haven't been hungry lately." I said shoving my hands into the pockets of my jeans.

Esme raised an eyebrow at me. "Really now. You're going to try and sell that story to me? Well that's just sad." She said shaking her head. "I thought you were a better liar than that."

"Are you ashamed of my lying abilities?" I asked with a laugh.

Esme smiled. "Maybe a little." She laughed lightly before looking me in the eyes again. "But really, you need to eat. I can make you something if you would like. Though you should probably just ask Bella; I'm not much of a cook. Bella tried to teach me, but I just didn't catch on to it."

I nodded. "That's ok. Nobody expects a vampire to become a gourmet chef anyways." Esme narrowed her eyes at me. "And yes, I'll eat something before I go to bed." I assured her.

Esme smiled. Silently she walked up to me and wrapped her arms around me. "I wouldn't worry too much about that other issue of yours." She said softly into my ear before pulling away. "It's just one of those things that takes time before everything falls into place and becomes perfet."

I smiled down at her and headed out of the garden, back into the house. I really needed to get something good for Esme's birthday.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

_We were being chased. Jake didn't look back as I fell to the ground crying. I had called out his name, but he ignored me. He ran through the trees, faster than me. I couldn't catch up to him. I tried to tell him to slow down, but he didn't pay me any attention._

_He was getting father and father, I could barely see him. I ran as fast as I could, but it didn't matter. He was gone._

_Jake left me behind._

_I fell to the ground and started to cry out. Why wasn't Jake answering?! These dark figures came in from every side of me. Closing in, circling me. I yelled for help. Why didn't he come to my rescue?_

_He had always come to my rescue before. Where was he? Why wasn't he here?_

_Had he forgotten about me?_

_Or had he just stopped caring._

_No._

"_I need you Jake" I rasped out as the creatures started pulling at my body, tearing into me; making it impossible to breathe._

"_JAKE?!"_

"Renesmee!" I heard someone call. The voice was warm and I opened my eyes, looking up at mom. "It was just a bad dream. It's ok." She said soothingly, gently brushing some hair out of my face.

I looked around; I was in my room, lying in my bed. It was dark outside, and the lamp beside my bed was turned on.

I nodded my head, but I saw that my hand was shaking. "Yeah. I'm fine." I said, but my voice wavered.

Mom stared me down, her eyes scanning my face with sharp eyes.

I tried to clear my dry throat. "Really mom. I'm ok, just a really creepy dream." I said looking her in the eyes. I didn't want her to worry about me.

She stared at me for another minute. "Are you sure?"

I nodded. But inside my own head, I wasn't sure. A question kept rolling around inside my head. Was Jake going to forget about me?

Maybe not forget me, but the possibility that he may not want me around, because he was uncomfortable with me, was far too real. We were in such an awkward situation, I wasn't even sure where we stood anymore.

"Sweetie?" I felt mom put her hand on my arm.

I looked up. "Yes?"

"Did you hear what I said?" She asked looking me over again with frantic eyes.

She had said something? When? I had missed it. "Um, no. Sorry." I said looking down at my hands.

Mom shook her head. "No, it's ok. I asked if you wanted anything. Do you?"

Yeah, I want to make things to get better with Jake. But I knew she couldn't do that.

Only I could.

So I just shook my head. "No. I'm just going to go back asleep." I said still looking down at my hands. I knew my eyes would betray my lie.

Mom didn't move for a moment; she probably knew I was lying. But after a minute she nodded. "Alright. If you think of anything just let me know." She said before leaning down to kiss my forehead. "I love you. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Okay?"

I nodded. "Love you too. Goodnight."

I watched her walk out of my room, shutting the door behind her before I threw back my covers and pulled my knees up to my chest. I rested my head on my knees and tried to keep my breathing steady.

Only I can make things get better between Jake and me.

I knew what would do that; fix things between us. But something held me back from doing it. If I did, if I told Jake that I wasn't going to try and make things different between us, that I just wanted to be friends; we would do just that. Be friends. Why did that suddenly seem like a bad thing? My chest hurt at the thought; of being friends, something about that didn't seem right anymore.

I wasn't even sure what I wanted! I wanted to be Jake's friend, yes; but there was something more that I wanted. Not from him, but some other part of him. Something I had never noticed I didn't have. But now I knew I was missing it. It like we were two pieces of a puzzle, and we fit together perfectly; except we kept shooting apart, like magnets turned the wrong way.

All I wanted was to be turned the right way, so Jake and I could be together. Closer than best friends. I wanted to know everything about Jake, I wanted to see him smile every second of his life and not see one moment of pain. I wanted him to have everything he has ever wanted!

And he imprinted on me. Meaning he _wants_ to be my best friend forever.

And I would give that to him. Even if that wasn't enough for me; because it's what he wants. I'd be his best friend forever.

But if I didn't do that; what would happen? Would my dream come true?

No. I wouldn't let that happen. I would make things right between us. I would make things go back to the way they were.

When I finally looked up the alarm clock on the table beside my bed said it was 4 in the morning

I got up from my bed and walked as quietly as I could out of my room. I knew I should probably wait until the morning, but I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep. I had to talk to him. I had to make things right between us before I could be at peace. I looked down the dark hallway; there weren't any lights on on this floor. But I didn't need them. I walked silently down the hallway and to the closed door on the other end. When I got to the door I listened for a second, and sighed to myself when I heard the uneven beat of Jake's heart beat. He wasn't asleep.

I tapped as lightly as I could on his door. I heard the bed creak slightly as he got off it and his footsteps as he walked to the door. I saw light suddenly pouring through the crack on the floor before Jake opened the door.

He was only wearing a pair of cut offs, his hair wasn't tied back and fell around his shoulders. Light shone from behind him making his front in shadows. I felt my breath catch at the sight of him. I noticed every line of muscle on his body; from his chest to his arms, and the ones going all the way down to the waist of his pants.

This was going to be harder than I thought.

"Is everything ok?" Jake asked imminently.

I shrugged; trying my hardest to get my eyes back onto his face. "I think we need to talk. Can I come in?"

Jake nodded and stepped aside letting me walk past him. As I did I felt his warmth that came off his body like a heater. It felt wonderful; and I wanted nothing more at that moment than to pull that heat close to me. "So what's up?" He asked softly and sat down on the edge of his bed.

I stood in front of him, trying not to stare. But it was harder than it should have been. I liked looking at him too much. Why couldn't he have been wearing a shirt when I had this conversation with him? "I can't sleep." I started off. "Look, I know we've kind of hit this really weird spot." I saw a look of realization come over his face. "Some things have changed, we both know it. And it's made things awkward between us." I paused to take in a deep breath. I could feel the tears starting to well up in my eyes. I did _not_ want to cry, but things weren't looking so good in that department. "I feel as if this _thing_ going on between us is pulling us apart." I rasped, trying not to cry. "I don't want that to happen. Jake I need you as a friend! I feel as though I could do anything as long as we're friends. But Jacob;" I paused to take in a deep breath. "I think the only thing I can't survive is losing you. Please, could we go back; to the way it was before? I can't lose you because of this. I need you. I need my best friend." I finished; my voice so low it was almost a whisper. I looked down at the ground in front of me.

There; I had said it. It was done.

"Renesmee," The sound of my full name made me look up. Jake was staring at me, in the way only he can, like he was looking right into my soul. "I've always been your best friend. And I always will be." He said softly. But there was something in his eyes, something I couldn't identify. "Just like I promised."

I smiled in relief, ignoring the pain in my chest. As long as Jake was in my life, in whatever way, I would be happy. "Good!"

Jake smiled too, a small smile and got to his feet. "I'm sorry I've been acting all weird, I promise to do better." He said walking up to me. All I could see was his bare chest, the muscles that covered most his body stood out. Blinking a few times I craned my neck back so I could look Jake in the face. But it just made my heart beat faster. His eyes were darker than normal, but had a spark in them that I hadn't seen before; with some hidden feeling. His hair fell down past his shoulders framing his face perfectly, making him look, well wonderful. "Thank you for still letting me be your best friend." He whispered so low I barely caught it.

I couldn't believe _he_ was the one apologizing. I shook my head and threw my arms around him middle. He could be so dumb some times. I felt his warm arms wrap themselves tightly around me; and I leaned my head against his chest. I tried not to think about how I amazing his big arms felt around my waist. I could hear the sound of his heart beating wildly against his chest. The sound was so beautiful I could have cried.

This is why I could be just friends with Jake.

Because now; his heart beat with happiness.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I lay back in my bed wondering why there literally wasn't a gaping hole in his chest.

"_I can't sleep. Look, I know we've kind of hit this really weird spot. Some things have changed, we both know it. And it's made things awkward between us. I feel as if this thing going on between us is pulling us apart. I don't want that to happen. Jake I need you as a friend! I feel as though I could do anything as long as we're friends. But Jacob; I think the only thing I can't survive is losing you. Please, could we go back; to the way it was before? I can't lose you because of this. I need you. I need my best friend." _

I had known imminently what she was talking about. I hadn't been able to breathe throughout her entire speech. I felt like her ever word was another slap in the face; she had called my love for her a _thing_.

I closed my eyes trying not to think too much about it. This was for the best; right? This is what I had decided to do anyway. Be her friend. Now I didn't have to worry about her thinking I was going to push my feeling onto her. She knew that I was fine with being friends.

Even if I wasn't.

I shouldn't be so surprised. I knew we were going to have this conversation sooner or later. But something about actually hearing it made it real. Like before it happened I could pretend that Nessie really did love me the same way I love her. That one day we would be the same as the picture that tormented my mind.

Again I saw the beautiful sight. Of me and Nessie and our little baby boy. I wasn't even sure if Nessie could have children! But that didn't matter; just the possibility was enough to send my imagination through the roof. I knew I shouldn't let my mind think of such things; but it was such an amazing thought! It was the most bitter-sweet thing. While I was in my own little world, where Nessie and I were together; like my heart believed we should be (no matter how many times I told it otherwise) I was the happiest man in the world. But the second I woke up from that perfect dream, the second I came back to reality it was like a bucket of ice was thrown over me; and a knife being pushed into my chest all at once. Leaving me breathless and in an almost physical pain.

This time was no different. The second I opened my eyes I; and realized that I would never get to actually see that day come, the breath was knocked out of me. I gasped for air; leaning heavily on my door.

This was going to kill me.

But that's what love is. Sacrificing one's self for the happiness of another. I guess I get to test my love for Nessie right off the bat.

Perfect.

* * *

**Hey peoples! Sorry I know it's been a while since I updated. I hit a little thing in the story and really had to think some things through before uploading this chapter. So the next couple chapters might be a little spaced out. But I will get them up here as soon as possible! Promise! Anywho hope everyone like the chapter! Please let me know by REVIEWING! Thanks and God bless!!**


	14. Chapter 14 Tears and Bad Ideas

Jacob's POV

My alarm clock went off and I walked away from my window to shut it off. Once I had I went back to my window and looked back out across the sparkling snow. But the image didn't catch my attention as I had hoped it would. I had been watching the scene all night, hoping if I kept mind on, not letting it sleep maybe I could keep it from thinking too hard about what had happened Friday night. But I'm not sure if it worked or not. But I had promised to Nessie things would be better, and I needed to make sure they were. So walking to my dresser I pulled out a nice pair of jeans and a cream colored long sleeved shirt that I remembered Nessie saying she liked on me. I laid them on my bed and headed down the hall to the bathroom.

I had my hand on the doorknob ready to turn when suddenly the door was pulled forward, pulling me along with it. Not expecting the sudden movement I stumbled forward and knocked into something solid, that started to fall over once I hit it. Without hesitating I reached out and caught the falling thing in my arms. After I steadied myself I looked and realized with an electrified shock that it wasn't an 'it' that I caught but a person, more specific a 'her'.

I stared dumb struck, Nessie, wrapped in the tiniest towel I had ever seen, showing plenty on top, and the bottom just reaching her thighs; and in the falling process the towel had been flailed off to the side where the two ends were supposed to meet showing off more of the side of her leg.

Oh boy.

I felt my heart beat quicken and breathing get shallow; but all I could do was stare. Neither of us made a sound, or tried to move; and after a minute Nessie started to blush under my gaze. After some time I realized, though I have no idea how, that what I was doing was completely inappropriate. So swallowing a lump in my throat I put Nessie steadily back on the floor. I took a step back as Nessie fixed her towel.

"Er, sorry. I didn't know you were in here." I said still in a daze. It took all my will power to keep my eyes on hers.

Not looking at me she nodded. "It's ok. But if you don't mind I would like to go to my room."

I nodded. Of course she would want to, I had just been staring at her like all those boys in school do; and right after I had just told her I would be her friend!

After a moment Nessie still hadn't move, and was looking at me with a raised eyebrow. "What?" Was I still staring? No. Ah crap; now I was!

"I might be a vampire, but I don't have the ability to walk through solid objects." She said with sarcasm.

Having absolutely no idea what she was talking about I looked around the room; what was wrong? Was something in her way? Did she want me to move it? After a second I realized I was the thing that was in the way. "Oh! My bad." I said quickly moving out of the doorway and into the hallway.

Nessie practically ran to her room the moment I was out of the way. I watched her go, and I'm sad to say that I enjoyed the backside view as much as I did the front. Groaning to myself I slumped into the bathroom and slapped myself across the face. I had to get a grip on myself!

* * *

Renesmee's POV

My alarm clock started to beep and I turned over in bed to turn it off. I felt the thing crush under my hand and groaned. Dang it. That was the third one I had gone through this year. I forced my eyes open and looked over at the small heap of broken plastic and wires.

"Oops." I croaked out. I rolled away from the sight; and tried to fall back asleep. But sleep had come hard last couple of nights and it didn't seem to come any easier now. Which really stunk, I had hoped that after I had made things better with Jake everything would be better again. But last night I was again proven wrong when all I could think about was how I would never kiss Jake. Giving up on sleep I climbed out of my bed and went to the bathroom. I hopped into the shower and let the warm water clear my head. Where had my weekend gone? It didn't feel possible that it was already Monday again. The last couple of days had been….fine? I guess that was the right word for it. Jake had been very nice. Always asking if I needed anything, studying with me, and watching whatever movie I wanted. But, it didn't feel right. I mean it was all the same stuff we've done before, but now there was a different air about it. I always felt like Jake was trying to make up for something. But for the life of me I couldn't think of anything that he had done that he needed to make up for. Everyone once in a while I would find him watching me from across a room; as if waiting for me to tell him to do something for me.

I hurried through the shower; I knew Jake would want one too. Once I turned off the water I hopped out and grabbed the first towel my hand touched; it was kind of cold out from under the hot water. I did a quick pat down before wrapping the towel around my body. I opened the door and was hit by something warm. Off balance I started to fall backward; but before I had fallen far a wonderfully warm arm wrapped itself around waist.

Knowing before I even looked I looked up at Jacob. His face was one of shock, maybe embarrassment, and something I wasn't sure what was.

Suddenly I was _very_ aware of the tiny towel I was wearing and the fact that I was so close to Jake, our stomachs pressed together and I could feel his warmth wrapping around my cool body. My breath caught in my throat and my heart skipped a beat. I hoped he wouldn't notice.

Neither of us said anything, and we didn't move; which I was insanely thankful for. It felt far too good to end so soon. I reveled in the feel of his arm around my waist, holding me close to Jake's body. But after another minute Jake set me back on the ground and to my dismay took a step back. Blushing even more I realized my towel was a little twisted so I tried to pull it back into its right place without being obvious to what I was doing.

"Er, sorry. I didn't know you were in here." He said soundly rather hallow. Like he was at a loss as to what to say.

Trying to stop blushing I said. "It's ok. But if you don't mind I would like to get to my room."

He nodded in understanding, but didn't move from the door way. I raised an eyebrow at him, "What?" He asked clearly lost.

"I might be a vampire, but I don't have the ability to walk through solid objects." I said as sarcastically as I could; trying to lighten the mood.

Jake looked around, then as if just realizing where he was he said. "Oh! My bad." He quickly moved out of the door way and I rushed by. I didn't look back but leaned heavily on my shut door.

Well that hadn't been too awkward.

Feeling ashamed I walked to my bed where I knew Alice had laid out my outfit for today. I shouldn't have enjoyed that so much. But sadly that wasn't even the worse part; I was sad that Jake hadn't enjoyed too. I knew I shouldn't be! It was crazy; and embarrassing. But still, some part of me was saddened by the fact that he hadn't.

Shaking my head I refused to think of it anymore. It was dumb! I wouldn't allow myself to wallow over this. Not even looking at it I picked up whatever Alice had laid out on my bed and slipped it on. When I was done I went to my vanity and dried my hair with my blow-dryer, before pulling it all back into a ponytail; it curled flowing all the way past halfway down my back.

Done with my hair I finally went to the full length mirror in my walk in closet. I looked nice. Wearing a dark pair of straight leg jeans and a fitted pretty dark green half sweater, the bottom not even coming down to my belly button and a tight gold shirt under that, the bottom of it tucked into my jeans; my shoes were black boots. I liked it; it was one of the better outfits Alice had ever made me wear.

Taking one last look over I went back to my bed where my book bag was, slung it over my shoulder and headed out of my room. It wasn't 'til I was about halfway down the stairs that I realized Neither Alice or Rosalie had come and 'helped' me get dressed. That was odd. But a second later the thought was lost to me; I had reached the bottom of the stairs and Jake came into view.

All thought left my head except; 'Holy crap he looks hot!' He wasn't wearing anything that really stood out; just jeans and a nice long sleeved shirt; though I had always thought that color looked good on him. But now, now good didn't even begin to cover how he looked. It was like suddenly my eyes were really open; like before now I was looking at Jake through a muddy window, and now, the window was gone; leaving only Jake.

"Ok, let's go!" Alice said coming from her room, followed by Rosalie.

As soon as the words left her mouth everyone paired up, mom and dad, Alice and Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett; and filed down the stairs. I walked next to Jake in silence and we made our way into the garage.

"So Renesmee, I heard you are making some friends?" dad asked pulling out of the drive-way.

I nodded, thankful that someone had broken the silence. "Yeah, Bethany is really cool. I really like her."

"And what about this Garret guy?" He asked. I knew he didn't like Garrett because of that first day that I had met him. But I didn't think it was right to judge so quickly.

I shrugged. "I like him." Was all I said; I didn't want to go into the details about feeling a little uncomfortable some times when we talked. That really wouldn't change dad's mind about him.

I glanced over at Jake who was looking out his window. I wonder what he thought about Garrett? Nothing else was said about the topic, mom and dad filled me in on everything I missed once I had fallen asleep last night, about the party, Alice's shopping trip she was planning to drag me on with Kate, mom, and Rosalie. I grimaced at that, though I would get to spend some more time with Kate, so I wouldn't complain; not too much anyway. When we pulled into a parking spot in the school lot we all climbed out and headed for the building.

Inside we separated, like always, dad kissing mom before walking down a hall while we went down another. We made our way to our first class in silence. Mom walked a few steps in front of Jake and me; as if she knew we were having a little issue or something.

Finally right before I walked into the class room I had to say something. But Jake beat me to the punch.

"Look, I'm really sorry about what happened this morning. I didn't realize you were still in there." He said and to my deep disbelief I think he was blushing!

Again I felt guilty; I had made him so uncomfortable. "Really; it's ok. It kind of surprises me that we haven't run into each other like that before now." I said with a shrug. "Really it was bound to happen sooner or later." I said hoping that helped in some way.

Jake nodded. "Ok." Was it; he didn't say anything more as we made our way to our seats.

I wasn't sure what that meant, if we were still ok, or what? But I didn't know anything to say, so I stayed quiet 'til Ms. Jason started class.

* * *

We walked out of Mr. Jason's class and I was sadly surprised to realize that Jake and I hadn't spoken at all through the class. Normally we would have whispered a few things to each other too low for humans to hear of course; and joke about something. But today; nothing. Jake had sat next to me staring down at the text book in front of him; as if I wasn't there. Not that I wanted him to not pay attention during class, but it would have been nice if he had at least looked in my direction.

Sighing to myself I shook my head; I was going crazy! I had to stop dwelling on this. It wouldn't help things if I drove myself crazy.

We walked silently side by side; I couldn't even get myself to look up at him and I found myself staring at my feet.

I hated this feeling! Not knowing how to act around my best friend. It was horrible. I wanted to be able to talk to him, see him laugh like I used to, smile like a fool for no other reason except that he was happy. But now; we were so tense around each other I wasn't sure we would ever be able to get back to where we were.

I couldn't even bear the thought. I was glad when we walked into Miss Kim's class and saw Garrett sitting on my desktop. If nothing else he would at least help me distract myself from Jake. Even if for just a moment. My feelings were going all over the place; I just wanted a minute of normalness. Of not feeling like I'm about cry at any moment; for who knows what reason!

I gave Garrett my best smile possible. "Hey! What's up?" I ask sitting down at my seat leaning forward to rest my elbows on the desk. "How did you do on the paper?"

Garrett smiled widely at my enthusiasm. "Hi; I think I did ok. I pretty much stayed up all night finishing it, but I think it turned out alright." He said looking down at me. "How about you?" It was then I realized how close I was to him, how by leaning against the desk I was leaning very close to him. The thought bothered me; even more than just the feeling of unease at being so close to Garrett. Something tugged at my mind, like my mind was saying something I just wasn't getting the meaning. I felt, almost; guilty?

Baffled I pushed the thought back for later and tried to remember what Garrett had just said. "Oh, um; yeah, I finished it Thursday." I said without thinking.

Garrett looked impressed and shocked at once. "Really? You finished the entire paper the night it was handed out?"

I wasn't sure why, but I had learned that humans didn't like homework. It was the one thing they all complained about. I didn't understand why. It wasn't that hard to do and it didn't take all that much time. So why put it off 'til the last second when you could do it right away and not have to worry about it for the rest of your time off? "I didn't really have anything else to do; so I thought I would just get it over with." I said, knowing I probably sounded lame.

After a minute Garrett smiled again. "Wow, that's cool."

He started off on this party he had gone to Friday night and I, sad to say, got distracted. Jake had shifted slightly in his chair making his hair shift in the light coming from the window, catching my eye. I glanced over at him and stopped breathing. Somewhere in the back of my mind I wondered if I was ever going to get used to how gorgeous he was. I mean really now?!

I felt the warm feeling come over me once more, only more intensified. I took in a shaking breath. Jake must have heard it because he looked up from his history book with concern on his face. Our eyes met and my heart did a flip. Oh I hope he didn't notice. I tried to look back to Garrett before I started to blush, but suddenly his eyes changed, growing darker with emotion; and I couldn't look away. Couldn't make myself want too enough. I stared at him, and everything else faded away into nothing. Nothing else mattered. It was like suddenly I realized that nothing else held any meaning to me. Nothing but Jacob.

It was like he was begging something from me with his eyes, pleading almost; and I wanted nothing else than to know what it was that he was wanting so that I could give it to him.

Just then Miss Kim clapped her hands together loudly twice making both Jake and I blink, breaking the eye contact. Jake looked at me for another second, but with a reserved expression, before turning to face the front of the class.

Gulping I did the same hoping my heart would stop racing.

* * *

It wasn't until I was walking through the lunch line that I thought I might have upset Garrett. I hadn't given him a thought since when we talked in class. But I caught him looking after me sulkily as he walked past me in the cafeteria. I sighed to myself. I really should have paid more attention to him while he was talking to me.

I almost felt mad at myself for letting myself so easily get distracted by Jake. I wasn't supposed to do that anymore.

I felt Jasper touch on my emotions a second later, instantly calming me down. I threw him a smile over my shoulder and grabbed a slice of greasy pizza.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I ate my pizza next to Nessie in silence. I had been doing really well today; I hadn't done anything, or said anything that would suggest that I noticed at all how close Nessie and Garrett sat before Literature. Or that seeing them like that was like poison to my heart.

Besides that moment when our eyes locked, I hadn't given away anything. Though in those few seconds; I am pretty sure she could see my pain and love. I hadn't meant to let anything show, but there was something in the way she was looking at me….it enchanted me. I wanted so badly to move to her side and hold her; because when she looked at me like that, I could almost pretend that she loved me too. But I knew too well that that wasn't true.

It didn't take long for me to finish eating and when I did I wasn't sure what to do with myself. I sat focusing with all my might at my hands in my lap; making sure they didn't stray to other things, or people.

No one was really talking about anything of importance. So I stayed in this position trying to listen to what they were talking about, and not about other things. I must say I did a pretty good job; considering Nessie was sitting right next to me, looking like an angel. With her arms crossed over one another on the table she leaned forward, talking to Alice about the shopping trip they were planning to go on with Kate. Her hair was pulled back showing off her face and neck; and while her shirt didn't have a Deep V it fit rather tightly hugging her curves perfectly. So not thinking about how insanely beautiful she was really was an accomplishment.

"Jake?" I heard Nessie's voice tinkle into my head.

I looked up and was met with her beautiful light brown eyes. I swallowed the lump in my throat and forced myself to speak. "Yeah?" Even the one word was hard, it took everything in me to get it out; while all I wanted to do was sit and stare at her.

"Just wondering what you're thinking. You've been really quiet." She said softly, looking up at me with concerned eyes.

I felt a smile tug at the corners on my lips; even if she didn't love me the way I wanted her to, it made me happy to see that she still cared for me. "I'm not really thinking. Just waiting."

"For what?"

I shrugged. "Until I can go to class." A look of uncertainty crossed her face before Nessie looked down. I started to ask if something was wrong but the bell decided it was a good time to ring about then and I didn't a chance to before Nessie was gone from my side and walking across the room.

Confused I quickly got to my feet and ran to catch up to her. "Nessie?!" I called rushing up behind her as she walked into the hallway. She didn't' turn but did stop, waiting for me to reach her. "Hey are you okay?" I asked bending down so we were eye level. I noticed with surprise that Nessie's eyes were rimmed red, like she was holding back tears. "Nessie?!"

Sniffling Nessie blinked away the tears that had started to form in her eyes and shook her head slightly. "It's nothing Jake." She said not looking at me. "I need to get to class."

"Yeah, uhuh, sure. Really Nessie what's wrong?" I asked. When she still wouldn't look at me I took her hand and started off down the hallway; pulled her along behind me. Nessie didn't fight me, she knew I wouldn't let her go no matter what she did; and I knew she didn't want to make a scene.

It wasn't 'til I pushed through the door heading outside that Nessie said anything at all. "Jake where are we going?" She asked, and I could tell she was still holding back tears.

I kept walking, not even bothering to reply. I moved quickly, heading to the one place I knew we could talk without being interrupted by anyone; and the one place that I had been wanting to show Nessie since I saw it. I pulled Nessie up the stairs leading up the side of bleachers. I didn't stop 'til I reached the top of the football stadium; when I did I rounded onto Nessie, pushing her up against the wall of the stadium trapping with one arm on either side of her head.

"Nessie what's wrong?" I asked softly. Still she didn't say anything. She was looking everywhere but at me. "Look we're not going to leave 'til you tell me why you're about to cry." I said gently but firmly. I had promised to be her friend and that meant making her happy. She was not happy now; that meant I was doing something wrong; and I needed to fix it.

The tears were filling her eyes again and I could tell she was doing everything in her power to keep them from spilling down her face. The sight was killing me; like a knife was shoved into my chest. I had to make it go away. I couldn't bear to see her looking so sad.

Sighing I moved my hand to the side of her face, moving it closer to mine making her look at me. We stared at each other for a moment before finally the tears started sliding down her face. Quickly I cupped her face with both of my hands and wiped away the tears with my thumbs. "Nessie." I nearly choked. I had to make things better. "Please talk to me." I said, it coming out no more than a whisper.

She closed her eyes tightly for a minute. When she opened them again I saw a breaking wall, like she had built it around some emotion but now that emotion was breaking through. "I don't know. I just feel as though you're leaving me." She said in a horse voice that broke my heart. "I mean I know it's silly, but I can't help but feel scared that we're never going to get back to where we were."

I felt like someone had just dumped a bucket of ice water on top of my head. This was all my fault. She was crying because of me; she was in pain because of me. Dang it I am such a jerk! Quickly I shook my head. "No, I promise, everything is going to be fine." I told her forcefully, trying to convince her and myself all at once. "We just need time to get over this bump. Really; I'll make sure things go back to normal. We just need time." I said softly.

Nessie nodded, blinking back more tears. Not thinking I leaned in and placed my forehead on hers. I closed my eyes willing myself to believe what I had just said. I _was_ going to make everything better. I _wasn't _going to make her cry ever again. I _was_ going to be her friend. I _was_ going to make her happy again.

We stayed where we were for some time; though I have no idea of knowing for how long. I couldn't make myself care either. It was too peaceful to just stay like this. Even if the situation wasn't one that I wanted; being close to Nessie, I couldn't help but be at peace. Nessie's aroma was all around me, filling my every breath with sweetness. Every time she exhaled I inhaled, taking in even more of her scent. After a while Nessie stopped crying and I opened my eyes for the first time since I had leaned my head against hers. Her eyes were rimmed red and were slightly puffy, her face red from crying.

"I'm so sorry." I whispered pulling back a little and brushing some hair out of her face with my fingers.

Nessie choked out a laugh. "No. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have broken down like that." She said with a shake of her head.

Her words hit me harder than they should have making me want to hug her tightly as I said. "Nessie, I want you to always be honest with me. No matter what's going on between us. I want you to always be able to tell me anything. No matter what it is; even if it does mean you cry. I want to be able to help. Please promise to always be honest with me."

Nessie nodded; taking in a deep breath she looked around us. I let my hands fall to my sides as she walked to the back wall and looked out at the far off mountains. I thought for the first time since I had brought her up here that maybe I had gotten too close. But it was too late to do anything about that now. I would just have to be more careful from here on out.

"How did you know to bring me here?" She asked still looking off into the distance. I stared at her for a moment before walking up to stand next to her.

"I was wandering around one day and stumbled onto it. I thought you might like it." I said watching her. Sometimes it really surprised me how Nessie could be crying one moment and then look strong and confident the next. But I knew better than to believe the face she put out there. I knew she was really hiding her real feelings; trying to find her way back to even ground.

"Really?" She asked looking mildly shocked.

I shrugged. "Well yeah, I wanted to see if this campus is really as small as it seems." I said lamely. I was pretty sure Nessie wouldn't believe me. And I was right.

"Sure you were." She said almost under her breath, but I still heard it; and she knew it. We stayed quiet for a while just looking off into the distance. "And?" She asked after a minute.

"And what?" I asked not having the slightest clue as to what she was talking about.

"Is it really that small?" She asked looking up at me with an amused smile.

"Yeah." I said leaning against the wall, resting my arms on top on it.

Nessie nodded and looked back out to the mountains. But my eyes stayed on her. I couldn't help it. No matter what I had just said about being more careful just a minute ago. A light breeze came by, playing with Nessie's hair and drying the remains of her tears that were still on her cheeks. She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. I watched as she exhaled and opened her eyes, looking rather sad before a wall seemed to come up around her hiding herself from the world. I didn't like that. It was like she was hiding from me.

After another minute a question popped up into my head, one that I needed to know the answer to. "Nessie;" I said and waited for her to look up before continuing. "what brought all this on? I mean why now? Did I do something to make you think I was being more distant?"

Nessie thought about it for a minute. "I'm not really sure. I think it was more like a whole bunch of things built up 'til one small thing just made me crack." She said softly. "When you said you were waiting for a chance to go to class," She looked down. "I kind of let my mind get away with me. Somehow I interpreted it as you wanting to get away from me."

In different circumstances I would have laughed at her. But I knew she was seriously having a hard time with this. So I settled for a little nudge with my hip to her side. "Silly Nessie; why would you even think that?" I said softly, trying to stay light, but also trying to make her see that that wasn't possible. So I said the only thing I knew too. "Nessie I imprinted on you. I'm always going to want to be around you. You need to remember that."

Nessie nodded, still looking down. "I know, I just thought maybe you were getting a little uncomfortable with the whole, um, different feelings we have." She said her voice so low I barely even heard it.

I froze for a second; neither of us had actually said what was going on between us. That I loved her and she didn't love me; it was just sort of implied. But somehow hearing it put it in a whole new light; and it hurt that much more. After a minute I realized I hadn't said anything back yet, so I quickly replied. "No, like I said, I'm always going to be your friend. Just like I promised. No matter what." I said hoping I sounded like I meant it. I wasn't sure, I was too busy trying to keep my eyes from watering to think straight.

I faintly heard Nessie say a 'thank you' of sorts, but I couldn't reply. My mind was reeling. There was no reason for me to react this way, I already knew that we had different feelings for each other, but it still stung. It hurt so bad I had to lean back against the wall to keep from staggering. My face must not have shown what was happening inside, because Nessie didn't seem to notice anything as I tried to calm myself down. For that I was grateful; if I was going to convince her that all I wanted to be was her friend then I didn't want her to see the pain her words had caused.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I felt like crying all over again. This was really insane! I wasn't even sure what was going on with me, but when Jake said that: "_No, like I said, I'm always going to be your friend. Just like I promised. No matter what." _A new pain came over me. It was like I had just been dunked under a pool of freezing water. My whole body was suddenly cold and I was shivering. But it wasn't like a normal cold feeling; it was more like all the warmth in my body had left, like I was suddenly just an empty shell with nothing left but the outer layer. I had finally said it out loud, that we had different feelings for each other. We both knew it to be true. But it wasn't 'til I heard Jake's reply that I realized that I was still hoping that he would give me a different answer; that this was all some big misunderstanding and that he wanted the same things I did. Even if I wasn't really sure what I wanted!

I stood there next to Jake, too far away to feel his warmth and didn't move any closer because I didn't want to do anything stupid. So I stayed where I was, my arms folded on top of the wall of the football stadium, shivering; trying to sort through my rambling thoughts.

We stayed like this for a while, neither of us speaking. And I eventually remembered we were supposed to be in class.

"Jake, shouldn't we get to class?" I asked, my voice coming out funny because my teeth were starting to chatter together.

Jake looked up from the spot on the ground he had been staring at for the past ten minutes. "Oh yeah, right." He said looking distracted.

We started back down the stairs, much slower than when we were walking up them. We were about half way down when Jake gently grabbed my arm; making me stop. I turned and looked up at him wondering why we stopped; but also loving the warmth his touch gave me.

"Are you cold?" He asked looking up and down me in shock. Which was to be expected; I didn't get cold that easy. Something about being half vampire.

I shrugged. "A little." I said my teeth now chattering wildly.

A pained look crossed Jake's face before he said. "Come here." He pulled me close to him and wrapped his arms around me before I could even blink. At once my body started to heat up. I sighed into his hug and leaned my head on his chest. "Nessie I don't want things to change because of the things that have happened between us. If you're cold then let me help. I really don't mind." He said rubbing small circulars on my back.

I nodded. But somewhere in the back of my head I wondered how we could ever do that. How could I ever act like I once did around him? When things _were_ different now. I felt different about Jacob now.

I just wasn't sure what all that entailed.

After a while I finally became so warm I thought I might fall asleep in Jake's arms so I pulled away and we headed back toward school. When we walked back into the building, Jake checked his phone and saw that it was almost time for the bell to ring, so we decided not to go to class for the last couple of minutes and headed to the gym instead.

By the time we got to the gym the bell had sounded and the gym was completely empty. We waited, sitting on the bleacher 'til some of our classmates started filling the room. Once I saw Bethany walk in I hopped off the bleachers and told Jake I'd seen him later. It felt weird walking away from him to someone else; I was usually leaving other people so I could be around him. Weird.

"There you are!" Bethany called running to me and throwing her arms around me.

Shocked I hugged her back. "Yeah, I decided to play a little hooky." I said pulling back. "What's up?"

Bethany shrugged. "Nothing. I can't believe you and Jake played hooky; and didn't invite me!?" She said laughter plainly in her eyes.

My turn to shrug. "Yeah, sorry, it was sort of the spur of the moment thing." I said as we headed for the girls locker room. "But I promise that next time we'll make sure to kidnap you." Bethany smiled widely at that. It wasn't 'til I had changed into my gym clothes that something that she said popped into my head. "Wait, how did you know I was with Jake? I didn't say anything about Jake skipping out on class too."

Bethany laughed. "Oh come on, why else would you skip class if it wasn't with Jake?"

I didn't even try to think up an argument. It would have been pointless. So instead I just shook my head and we headed out to see what we would be doing today. We were one of the first people out of the changing rooms, us and another boy standing in a corner. It took me a second to realize that it was the boy Garrett had introduced me to last week. Justin.

"Hey, do you know Justin?" I asked Bethany nodding towards the corner where he was standing looking down at the ground.

Bethany looked and nodded. "Oh yeah; Justin Larkin. I've known him since he moved here, he lives next to me." She said and looked back to me. "Why?"

I looked at Justin as I spoke. "Is he always so, awkward around people? I met him last week with Garrett, and he seemed really nervous."

Bethany nodded. "Oh well if it was with Garrett than yeah. Justin is always kind of jittery when Garrett is around. I don't know why; I sometimes think Garrett might be bullying him around or something, but Justin won't say."

That surprised me. Garrett didn't seem like the kind of guy to bully anyone. "Did you have any reason to believe that?"

Bethany shrugged. "Not really, just the fact that Justin acts all nervous around him."

I nodded. I was pretty sure that Garrett wasn't that sort of guy. He seemed nice. But either way I felt like I could like Justin, he seemed like a good guy. "Come on." I said heading toward Justin's corner.

He didn't notice us walking towards him 'til we were almost right in front of him. He looked up startled.

"Hey Justin!" Bethany said happily.

Justin looked between us in shock and alarm. "Hi." Was all he said.

"I'm Renesmee Cullen." I offered hoping he wasn't scared by me; though the look on his face told me he wasn't really comfortable. "We met last week, with Garrett." I hoped he remembered.

I smiled when he nodded. "I remember."

"I'm glad." Was all I could think to say. So we fell into an uncomfortable silence; Justin looking down at the ground in front of him, Bethany swaying back and forth smiling off into space, while I just stood there trying to think of something to say and feeling more and more stupid standing there with nothing coming to mind.

A few minutes later a familiar voice came from behind me. "Hey, what's going on over here?" Jake said coming to stand beside me; I ignored the thoughts that first came over me as that warmth spread through my body.

"Hey!" I said relieved to have something to say. "We were just talking to Justin. Have you met?" I looked between the two; Jake shook his head and held out his hand.

"Hi, I'm Jake." He said shaking Justin's hand once before pulling back. Justin nodded, his eyes still on the ground. I wasn't sure what to do, I had a feeling he wasn't really comfortable around people, but I wasn't sure if he really wanted to make friends or if he liked being on his own. So I wasn't sure if I should leave him alone, or try and be friendly to him.

Not really sure what else to do I asked. "So what classes are you taking?"

Justin looked up wide eyed and said. "German, Biology, History, and Gym." He listed still looking rather shocked by the question. I wasn't sure why that would surprise him; it wasn't that odd of a question. I didn't get a chance to ask how he was liking those classes because by then everyone had returned from the locker rooms and were now starting to surround Coach Blanch, who was calling everyone over.

* * *

By the time I finally said good bye to Bethany, who had pulled me aside immediately after gym to discuss why caterpillars were on the earth, which was a very interesting topic, the family, was waiting in the parking lot for Jake, who had stayed behind waiting for me, and I got to the car.

"I'm really starting to like that Bethany girl." Dad commented as we drove off the school grounds.

I couldn't help but smile. "Yeah, I mean just on the outside she is great, and has interesting views on things; I can't imagine what it must be like on the inside of her head."

Dad laughed. "I don't think I've ever encountered another human like her."

We rode the rest of the way talking about Bethany from the inside and just a few of the things that dad had picked up from her during the short time they had been around each other.

* * *

Jacob's POV

As much as the topic of Bethany made me laugh I couldn't fully concentrate on the discussion. My thoughts surrounded Nessie. Of course. But more specifically I was thinking about something that had occurred to me while walking back from the football stadium. What was something I could do to help Nessie think all I wanted was to be her friend. To make her believe that was all I wanted.

Suddenly the answer came to me.

No. Nope, not going to do it! Just the thought of it made me want to hurl! I couldn't do it!

But it was the best plan I had. And it would definitely make Nessie think I didn't want anything more than friendship. And because of that, I would do it. For her.

* * *

**Ok I know I haven't updated in a while, sorry. I've been kind of stuck and needed to decide some things. But I think I have it figured out so hopefully I'll be able to update again soon! Anywho I hope all you like the new chapter. Please review! God Bless!**


	15. Chapter 15 I Love You, So Goodbye

Renesmee's POV

I slept funny that night. I rolled around for hours after I tucked myself in; thinking about Jake. But after I finally did sleep, it was like I stayed half awake the entire time. It was an odd feeling. It was like I knew I was dreaming as I dreamt of Jake and me skating around the pound Jasper had shown me.

Though it did have its up sides. When I woke up the next morning, I didn't have to be sad that it was only a dream; because I already knew. So I guess that's something to be grateful for. But when I woke up I felt as though I hadn't slept at all. And it didn't help my sad mood as I got ready that morning for school. And the fact that both Alice and Rose were both there when I woke up ready to primp me up probably didn't help. But I felt like I owed them something since they let me have a brake yesterday; so I didn't comment when I came back from my shower; (with no unexpected run ins with anyone in the hallway) and they started on my hair.

It took about as long as normal, 45 minutes. When they were done, I looked just as I expected; like a Cullen. There was such a thing as a Cullen look. And I think you really do have to be a Cullen to have it. It's not just in the way that you look, though that sure is a big part of it, but also in the way that you hold yourself, it's like your whole body is yelling out to the world 'Yes, I know who I am and I know that who I am is freaking awesome'. Yet we say this without being smug, well except Rosalie sometimes, but we say this just because that is who we are and we are not ashamed of it. And even though I hadn't quiet gotten down the 'I know who I am' part, I never felt like I looked more like a Cullen then after Alice and Rosalie dressed me up.

Once they had looked me over for the hundredth time, they deemed me perfect and we headed down stairs where the guys were all waiting for us. Except Emmett of course who was too busy trying to kill a zombie to even notice that we were all walking off to the first floor without him. This was kind of ironic since he was the one complaining we were going to be late because of Rosalie and Alice. Once we were all in the car, and Emmett still hadn't joined us, I could tell Rosalie was about to blow. I looked over at her in the car next to us; where she was sitting in the driver's seat, elbow braced on the side window, hand holding her head and her fingers drumming on the steering wheel in irritation. I watched, amused but fearful for Emmett's life at the same time, for about two minutes before Rosalie jumped out of the car, slammed her door shut, stomp back into the house and screech in a way that only she could.

"EMMETT GET YOUR LAZY BUTT DOWN HERE NOW BEFORE I KILL YOU!"

Two seconds later Emmett was standing at the door, somehow looking shorter than Rosalie as she towered over him glaring down at him, while he looked at her innocently. They looked at each other for a minute, before Rosalie pointed angrily at the car. Emmett quickly slid in, wisely keeping his mouth shut.

I shared a look with Jake, one that said that 'I am laughing my head off on the inside, but am afraid to show it because Rosalie will kill me if I do', as we headed out the driveway and to school. I reached over and laid my hand on top of Jake's, letting my thoughts flood into his head.

_'Ah Jake, my insides as starting to crack from all this not laughing! It's killing me!'_ I thought to him laughing in my thoughts, because that was the only relief I was going to get.

Jake smiled in understanding, nodding his head; his eyes telling me that he was laughing too.

It wasn't 'til we were halfway to school before I realized that Jake and I had just shared a moment that we hadn't for a while; I wasn't sure how to explain it. But some part of me knew this feeling, it was familiar. I missed it.

We stayed quiet for the rest of the ride; though dad had put a CD in so it wasn't a bad kind of silence. Just no one had anything to say. I was still hyper aware that Jake was sitting next to me, and that he had his hair pulled back into a pony tail at the nape of the neck. He wore a black polo and loose blue jeans. It almost looked natural on him; though I had never seen him even wear a shirt before we moved here. I wonder if he used to dress like this before he turned into a werewolf. That was something I would have to ask him later.

We parked and headed into the school, and I noticed that Jake looked deep in thought as he walked beside me; his forehead creased and his eyes staring off into oblivion. I thought about asking what he was thinking about, but decided I would leave him to his thoughts for now and ask him later.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I don't know how the day could have passed by so quick; one minute I was sitting in the car next to Nessie on the way to school, then the next I'm walking towards the cafeteria. Though I hadn't paid all that much attention to what was going on around me, I was pretty sure that time must have sped up, laughing as it did so, knowing that once I went to lunch I would have had to make my decision.

But I still wasn't sure. The fact that I would rather cut my own arm off instead of going through with this probably had something to do with that fact. But I needed to push that aside. I needed to get this over with, before I talked myself out of it.

_Just keep thinking of Nessie. Remember why you're doing this._ Was what I chanted inside my head over and over again; it was the only thing that made me know I had no choice. I would do this.

I stepped in line behind Nessie in the lunch line and started going through my plan again.

I was going to pull Kittie; gah, aside during lunch and ask her to go with me to the school's formal coming up after the break. And I would have to make sure Nessie saw it. She could ask me about it later and then I would explain to her how I had thought about it a lot-.

"Jake." Nessie whispered in a low voice. I looked down at her and my heart broke when I thought about being with anyone else but her.

"Yeah?" I could tell by her eyes that she found whatever she was going to tell me rather funny.

"I think you have a stalker." She said nodding toward a table in the middle of the room where a bunch of kids were sitting talking about who knows what; but I saw at once that she was referring to; Kittie who was watching me quiet blatantly. "You know you think she could take a hint that you're not interested; I mean you avoid her all day! After all the guys she has gone through you'd think that she'd know a thing or two about them."

I groaned inside my head. Crap! This wasn't going to work. I can't believe I hadn't thought of this before. There was no way I was going to be able to convince Nessie that I had _always_ thought Kittie was kind of cool; and had been toying with idea to ask her out for a while. No; there was just no way that Nessie would buy that.

"I don't think people like Kittie ever learn anything, even if you explain it to them a hundred times." I said. Well so much for that plan. Great.

As much as I had wanted to help things between Nessie and me, I couldn't help but feel a little relieved. At least now I wouldn't have to pretend that I was dating Kittie! But the happy feeling didn't last, because now I was back to square one again. I couldn't just go up to some random girl I had never spoken to and ask her out. That would really make Nessie suspicious. Sighing to myself I grabbed a bottle of water and followed behind Nessie to our table where I sat and stared at my bottle for lunch.

I could tell Nessie wanted to ask what I was thinking, but she didn't. Which I was glad for; I didn't like lying to her; and I would have to start doing that a lot soon. I wanted to keep that off for as long as possible.

I didn't speak at all during lunch, just trying to think of a way to rectify my plan. The bell rang out through the lunch hall and I got to my feet; I was going to Mrs. Nickles' class now, at least I would have time to think during that. I actually kind of enjoyed gym; somewhat. I couldn't do nearly how much I would like to during class, but I did get to make Garrett look like a joke; that was always fun.

The bell rang and I hadn't even gotten the hallway when the answer to my problem came to me. The problem was Nessie knew Kittie, knew I couldn't stand her; I needed someone that Nessie didn't know that much about, but someone I knew. Preferably someone in a class that I didn't share with Nessie; which was Biology. Perfect.

A pain came into my chest; it really was going to happen. I was going to be with someone that wasn't Nessie. I turned to Nessie before we were going to part ways in the hall. She looked up at me with curious eyes. She looked just as beautiful as ever, and it made my chest ache harder. After today, things would go back to the way they should be. She would know that we were friends; she wouldn't have to worry about me possibly having other feelings.

I was a little shocked when I felt a warm hand touch mine. Nessie's voice filled my head, blocking out all other noise. _'Jake, is something wrong?'_

I wanted so badly to tell her exactly what was wrong. That I shouldn't have to go and lie to her, that I didn't want to do what I was about to do; that I wanted nothing more than to kiss her right here and make her realize that she was in love with me too.

But I couldn't do that. That would mess things up between us beyond repair. I couldn't do that. I would be happy with Nessie as a friend.

So instead of doing what my heart begged me to, I shook my head. Giving her hand a squeeze I leaned down and kissed Nessie on the forehead. I pulled back and said softly. "Nothing is wrong, I'm just glad I have a best friend like you."

Nessie stared up at me wide eyed, looking a little confused. But I didn't say anything else, just gave her hand one last squeeze before turning away from her; to go do what must be done.

_I love you;_ I said in my head, knowing I would never be able to actually tell her the words out loud. _I love you, so good bye…_

* * *

God, kill me now.

I sighed and walked into Mrs. Nickles' classroom. Miley was already sitting in her seat and for once I was somewhat glad. Kind of.

"Hey Miley." I said letting my bag fall to the floor and sitting down next to the girl I had tried so hard the last two weeks to avoid; though it hadn't been too hard since this was the only class we had together. And that was why she was the perfect choice, I knew she had some sort of crush on me, and I had never mentioned her to Nessie.

Miley beamed at me. This was the first time I had ever addressed her first. "Why hello Jacob." She said in a sweet like voice.

I did my best not to shudder. I had to get this right. I had to do this for Nessie. "So you know this dance that's coming up?" I asked through gritted teeth.

Miley's eyes grew big and they shone with anticipation. "Yes?"

Swallowing, I spit out the words hoping they wouldn't sound like acid. "I was hoping you allow me to take you?" The words came out in a rush, because if I said them slowly, I wasn't sure I would have gotten them all out. But now there was nothing I could about it.

I had done it.

I had let Nessie go.

Miley smiled widely. "Wow, this is just so unexpected." She said, though it sounded like she had. Like she thought herself so amazing that I wouldn't be able to help but ask her.

"So?" I forced out the word.

She looked thoughtful for a moment and I had to fight the urge to roll my eyes. I knew she wanted to go with me. She had made that painfully obvious over the past week and a half. "Sure! Why not?" She said happily.

I sighed inwardly. Why couldn't I just be struck by lightning? It would have been less painful than this. "Great." It took all I had in me to smile.

Miley put her hand on top of mine which was on knee. "I was just thinking the same thing." She said softly leaning in closely to me.

I kept myself from jerking away and let her be close to me. I guess I was going to have to get used to it.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I really should just get used to not being able to think properly; here I was again, sitting in a school where I was supposed to be trying to learn things to help me through life; and all I can do is relive the full second of Jake's kiss on my forehead.

I know; I'm pathetic.

It was really kind of silly if you thought about it, which I did. Jake has kissed me on the forehead almost every night since I was born; it shouldn't have this kind of effect on me. Yet it did.

I felt kind of bad about not listening to Mr. Jones, but I couldn't help it. Again, I played through the scene; probably for the thousandth time. Though it was only a few seconds long so it didn't take much to replay what had happened. I mean his lips barely touched me.

But still; they _did_.

Each time I relived the moment, a warmth washed over my entire body, making goose bumps rise all over my arms; but along with it was an achy feeling in my chest, one that I was starting to become familiar with; though I don't think anyone could ever become used to it, each time this feeling hit me it hit me with even more force than the last. I now knew that this hurt went hand in hand with all the warmth that was with me every time I was with, or even thought about Jake. It was bitter-sweet. I had never really found a good time to use that saying, but now, it seemed perfect.

I was only half surprised when the bell rang, I hadn't paid attention to what was going on around me; but I had kept my eyes on the wall clock above the door, waiting for class to be over. I wanted to see Jake again. Even if it hurt to see him, knowing I would never be allowed to be with him the way I wanted to, but it was worth it. The warm feeling I got when I was around him, it was indescribable!

So as soon as the bell rang I started packing up books. I had just pulled the strap of my bag over my shoulder when Dad put a hand on my arm. I turned, wondering what he wanted, but also wanting to keep going, to find Jake.

"Nessie," Dad said looking like he was having some sort of battle with himself. "can I talk to you for a minute?"

Curious I nodded and let him lead into the hallway and to stand near the wall so people could get by us without bothering us. "What's up?"

Dad looked around, as if making sure no one was listening, before he spoke. "Um, nothing really. I was just wondering how you were?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Really?" He nodded. "I'm good." I said with a shrug. I wasn't sure if that was strictly true, but it was the only answer I knew to give him. It wasn't like I could just tell him that I really wasn't all that 'good', I sometimes felt like crying for almost no reason, I had been having kind of odd dreams, and I wanted desperately to kiss someone I would never be allowed to. What would he think if he knew? Would he think that I was gross? I mean he sees Jake and me as brother and sister.

"There isn't anything you want to tell me?" Dad asked, his eyes boring into mine, as if he was trying to know what I was thinking, really that's probably what he was trying to do.

Then his words sank in. Was there something he wanted me to tell him? What could he want to know about? A thought suddenly hit me; and I almost gasped out loud. Dad can hear thoughts, not mine, not moms, but everybody else's. He could hear Jake. What if Jake has been thinking about all this? Crap!

No, I had to play it cool. Dad wouldn't be asking if he already knew everything. Maybe he'd only heard snippets. So I shrugged. "Not really? Why?"

Dad quickly shook his head. "No reason. Ok you should get to class." He said.

I nodded and turned to walk away, hoping he wouldn't come up with another question before I got away.

But when I turned I saw something that made me stop. It was Jake, in my hallway, but he wasn't here to walk with me to the gym. I watched, confused, a sick feeling starting to curl in my stomach. Jake was walking, his back to me, with a girl that faintly looked familiar, they walked very close together, closer than what they should have been. The sickening feeling got stronger. I watched as they walked up to a classroom and stopped, the girl leaning against the wall next to the doorway. They talked for a minute and I saw the girl reach out and touch Jake's forearm. I nearly choked when he gave her a smile. After another minute Jake walked away, leaving the girl staring after him, as well as me. My whole body started to ache. What had just happened?

I gaped for another minute before I remembered I had to get to gym. But now the idea didn't seem so appealing; it almost scared me. Though I had no other choice; so I started toward the gym. Feeling rather numb, except for this feeling in the pit of my stomach. I was about to open the door to the gym when I remembered where I had seen the girl before; outside of Jake's Biology classroom. I walked through the doorway and quickly making my way to the locker room, hoping I would be able to get there before anyone tried to talk to me. Once I had made it I went into a kind of robot mode; I didn't even see what I was doing, but I knew I was changing into my shorts, t-shirt, and sneakers. Once I was done I sat down on the wooden bench that went the length of the locker room to wait 'til class was to start.

I sat there for at some time, I moved to head back out into the gym only after everybody else had already left the locker room. I walked out with my head down, so I didn't meet anyone's eyes. I stood at the back on the group as Coach Blanch told us that the girls would be playing basket ball, while the boys would be doing sprints. I followed the crowd as we headed for the court.

Why was I acting like this? Nothing had happened? I mean he just walked a girl to her class room. I thought as we were split into two teams. I had no reason to act like I was; nothing happened. And if something did, I still would have no right to act like I was. Why couldn't I shake this empty feeling?

Why did I feel I had just lost something that I desperately needed?

* * *

I showered and was dressing back into my clothes when I heard Bethany's voice beside me.

"Nessie? Are you ok? You look a little pale." She said pulling her jeans on.

I pulled my shirt over my head so I didn't have to meet her eyes. "Yeah, I'm just felling a little sick, I think I ate something bad for lunch." I lied smoothly. It sometimes made me sad at how well I could do that; lie on the spot. But I didn't let it get to me, it was a part of being a Cullen; and I loved being a Cullen.

"Yeah, you have to be careful when you eat at school. I usually bring my own lunch; I don't risk it anymore." She said pulling her hair back into a pony tail.

I nodded not really wanting to talk at the moment I told her I had to go and walked away before she could even respond. That was probably mean and uncalled for, but I just didn't think I could handle talking right now. Not with my feelings doing a downward spiral and I kept picturing Jake with that Biology girl in the hallway. The scene wouldn't leave me as I headed out of the gym alone. I must have changed quicker than Jake, and I didn't feel like waiting for him. I didn't know how I would react when I saw him; and that scared me.

So I walked toward the car alone; feeling even more alone than I was, considering I was surrounded by classmates. I made it to the car and was surprised to see that mom and dad were already in it. I hopped in and dad turned and looked at me.

"Hey angel, are you alright?" He asked looking at me sympathetically.

Wait, why would he be looking at me like that? "Kind of, I don't really feel well." I said fully ready to use the same excuse I had with Bethany.

"Ok, do you want to go ahead and head home? Jake could get a ride with the others." Dad offered. I was confused; they were acting a little odd, dad was looking sad and hopeful while mom was looking sympathetic and a little annoyed.

Not really sure what to do I nodded; any way to delay seeing Jake sounded appealing right now. I needed to sort through some things before I saw him.

Dad nodded and started out of the parking lot, not even telling Rosalie or anyone that they would be taking Jake home; maybe Alice had a vision or something. But for some reason that didn't make a lot of since, Alice had a hard time seeing into the future if Jake had anything to do with it, unless she was looking for a specific thing. Though it was getting easier.

But I couldn't keep thinking about that; my mind turned back to Jake. Jake and that other girl. I really didn't like the feeling I got when I saw them, it was like I wanted to throw up, but it hurt too.

Why had he been with her? He didn't talk to any of the girls, let alone walk with them to a class. A class that wasn't even his. The feeling in my stomach grew suddenly moving up to my chest too. It hurt so badly. Stifling a gasp I laid down on the seat and facing the backside of the seat, so neither mom nor dad could see my face. I let my face crumble a little, but still didn't make a noise. I stayed like this 'til we reached the house, as soon as the car had stopped moving I jumped out, not even grabbing my bag and ran as fast as I could into the house. I didn't stop 'til I reach my room, I locked the door and flew to the bed where I wrapped my arms around my legs that were folded as I curled up into a little ball. I lay like this for a while, not thinking at all. Feeling numb all over, like none of this was real.

I needed to get a grip, I knew that. I wouldn't have a lot of time before Jake got home. I wonder if he would tell me about the girl he was with today. I wasn't sure if I wanted him to; I didn't want to hear about them, but at the same time I couldn't help feel the need to know. I had to know what was going on between them. Was he going to ask her out? Did he plan to take her to the formal?

Before I could stop it a picture of Jake with that other girl popped into my head. They were on the staircase Jake wearing a black tux with white shirt, the other girl wearing pretty purple floor length dress. They stood halfway up the stairs looking at each other, Jake's arms around her waist.

I quickly shook the picture away, but it left behind a sinking feeling that overwhelmed me. I screwed my eyes shut; hoping it would help, but it only brought back the picture. My eyes flew open and I sighed.

What was wrong with me? Why do I feel this way? I had never felt like this before; why now? How could I get it to go away? I didn't like feeling like this all the time! I wanted it to go away.

But sitting here dwelling on it wasn't making it any better. Sighing again I got up from my spot on the bed and walked out of the room. I knew without thinking where I wanted to go; there was only one place I really could go in a time like this. I walked down to the first floor, past mom and dad on the second who were sitting on one of the couches; I made my way through the living room and stopped in front of the beautiful black instrument.

This was one of the things I shared with my father, our enjoyment in playing the piano. There were very few things that I enjoyed more than playing or even listening to the piano. But right now I wanted nothing more than to play; listening to it just wouldn't be enough for me right now. I needed to touch the keys, make them make noise. I needed to play something no one else knew yet, bring a new rhythm into the world. I needed to feel like I could control at least this one thing, making my own music.

I slowly circled the instrument, watching as the light shifted over its black surface; making the shadows move around as I walked. When I reached the stool I sat down and ran my fingers over the keys, letting my skin glide over the smooth surface before I hit the first note of a new song.

I played out the next couple of notes, following the swing of my mood, letting my feelings guild my fingers to the right keys. I started to gather speed as the music started to grow louder. I played and played, only stopping every now and again to change a note that I had hit to something different.

It was a very awkward piece, starting off slow and haunting then getting louder and more urgent as the song went on. To anyone listening, they wouldn't know what to make of it; it was neither sad nor angry. But maybe a mixture of both, and a little confusion.

All throughout the song Jake and the other girl flooded my thoughts making my mind and feelings drift from one thing to another in a matter of seconds. I kept playing, the song lasting longer than it needed to; but I didn't stop. I was almost at peace here, though not really; I knew the second I opened my eyes to the real world the image of peace would shatter. So I kept the song going, playing not for pleasure but, but out of need to get away from the cruelty of life.

I kept playing 'til I felt someone's hand touch my shoulder. My fingers stopped and I looked up at mom.

"Hey, can I sit with you?" She asked her eyes letting me know how worried she was.

I nodded and she scooted onto the bench next to me. Neither of us said anything for a while; but after a few minutes I leaned my head on mom's shoulder, suddenly feeling terribly tired.

"Honey, are you alright?" Mom asked putting her arm around my waist.

I wanted so much to tell her everything, to tell her all about these weird feelings I had been having toward Jake, how I wanted to kiss him when I was close to him, how much it hurt to see him with that other girl; even if they weren't doing anything! Just seeing him smile at her and not knowing whether he _liked_ her was like a torture worse than anything Alice and Rosalie had ever done to me.

But I still was afraid of what mom would think if she found out about all of that, would she understand? Or would she be disgusted by my feelings. I wasn't sure and I couldn't risk it. I didn't know what I would do if mom ever looked at me like that. Besides there was nothing she could do about it anyway. No, there was nothing good that could come out of me telling her.

So instead I shrugged. "I don't know mom, I just haven't been feeling like myself lately." I told her, looking down at my hands that were folded in my lap.

"Yeah I could have told you that." She said with a small laugh. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

I nearly laughed at myself; didn't I just decide that she couldn't do anything? Funny. "No, I think I need to just get on with my life and leave this, whatever this is behind." I said with a sigh.

Mom nodded and kissed my forehead. "Ok sweetie."

I lifted my head from her shoulder. "I've got a butt ton of home work I need to get done." I told her getting to my feet; feeling like I needed to be alone.

Again mom nodded. "Ok, funny as this might sound, so do I." She said getting to her feet as well.

I couldn't muster up a laugh but I smiled as we walked up the stairs to the second floor; were mom gave me a hug before heading off toward her room. I stared after her, was this how it was going to be from now on? Lying and hiding myself behind a mask as to not hurt anyone.

While I headed up the next flight of stairs I thought about this. I didn't like the idea of doing this forever. I didn't like the idea of doing it for a week. Lying to mom was almost as bad as lying to Jake, and I hated that. I reached my room and sat on the floor, leaning my back against the side of my bed. I guess I would just have to do as I told mom; just move on and leave these feelings behind.

Why did I get the feeling that was going to be easier said than done…

* * *

Jacob's POV

I walked out of the locker room after having showered and changed back into my clothes after gym and headed for the door. When I reached the exit I leaned against the wall to wait for Nessie. I shoved my hands deep into my pockets at the thought of her. What would she say when she saw me? What was I going to say? I had no idea. I wonder if she saw me with Miley when I walked her to class. I hoped she did. Because then it was very likely that she would bring it up when she joined me. That would make things a lot easier. I didn't know what I would do if she didn't see us. How was I supposed to bring something like that up?

Nope, wasn't going to worry about it. She probably did see us. But still it didn't feel right. I hated thinking about after Nessie knew that I was taking Miley to the formal, because then I would actually have to start hanging out with her. Not to mention all the lying I would have to do! Already I was lying more than I would ever want to, and that was only the start.

I sighed, but then saw Bethany coming out of the locker rooms and stood up a little straighter; Nessie usually came out with her. I watched in disappointment and relief, Nessie didn't follow Bethany out. I was disappointment because I couldn't see Nessie and relieved that I had a little more time before I had to start playing the role of the best friend telling Nessie about the girl he was now going to be dating.

When Bethany was about to walk out the exit she turned and saw me. She smiled and walked up to me. "What are you doing here?"

I shrugged wondering why she should even have to ask why. "Just waiting for Nessie. What is she doing in there?"

Bethany's eyes squinted. "But she left a little while ago. She was left before I even had my shoes on."

What? "Oh, I guess I missed her. Thanks." I mumbled and walked past Bethany out into the cold. Why hadn't Nessie waited for me? My first thought was Garrett, maybe he was harassing her and she went on ahead to the car to get away from him. As much I wished that to be true I was pretty sure it wasn't. But one could wish right? Because then I would have a good reason to kick him in the face once and for all.

I walked to the parking lot in a day dream about beating up the kid. It wasn't 'til I reached the empty parking space that I realized that Edward's car wasn't here anymore.

"Jake, you're riding with us." I heard Jasper call. I turned and saw him leaning against Rose's car next to Alice.

"Why?"

Jasper shrugged. "I don't know, that's just what Edward told me."

Confused I shrugged and walked over and joined them as we waited for Rose and Emmett. A minute later I wished that they would hurry up all ready when I saw Miley making a bee line for where I was standing.

I forced down a groan and tried my best to smile pleasantly as she came to stand in from of me.

"Hey Jacob, I'm surprised to see you still here." She said her eyes looking me up and down once. I felt like squirming under her eyes, but I held still. "So I was thinking that the formal is kind of a long way off and that we should do something a little sooner." She said her voice sounding funny, I think she was trying to sound seductive, but only served to sound like she had something stuck in her throat.

"What did you have in mind?" I asked, hoping I sounded interested in what she was saying instead of only interested in when she was going to leave.

She took my hand, oh why did she have to touch me? "Oh I don't know, maybe a dinner and a movie?" She said it in a question, but made it sound like a command.

"Sounds great, how about this Saturday." I said wondering how much longer I could keep this smile in place. I didn't think I could for much longer.

"Perfect! You can pick me up at 8:00. Here's my address." She handed me a piece of paper with direction scribbled down in pink ink.

"'Kay, see you tomorrow." I said finally seeing Rose and Emmett walking up to the car.

Miley smiled, let go of my hand and started walking backwards. "Yes, you will."

I smiled one last time before she turned and I let the smile fall off my face. I prayed she got hit by a car while trying to get to her own.

"What the heck was _that_?!" Alice asked looking at me horrified.

I sighed and hopped into the car. This was going to be a long ride home.

* * *

**I know I said I would update soon, I'm sorry it took me so long. An old friend of the family died this week, and so I had a lot going on. Anywho I hope you all like the chapter! I've already started on the next one! Please review! God Bless!**

**Vinetta-Venture**


	16. Chapter 16 It Hurts

It Hurts

Renesmee's POV

Jake didn't say anything about the girl. Didn't mention anything about her for the next three days. I wouldn't have even known she existed if it was for the fact that Jake walked her to her classroom that was down the hall from mine every day.

Why didn't he tell me anything about her? Maybe her name? Obviously she was something to him, or he wouldn't bother walking with her to class. Was she like Bethany? Was she just a good friend, or was she something more. I hoped for the first, though I somehow knew it wasn't. I wasn't sure why I knew this, maybe it was the way he wasn't saying anything about the girl, I mean if she was just a friend then wouldn't he tell me about her? Wait. We were supposed to be friends, right? So even if she was more, then shouldn't he want to tell me about her?

Oh no! What if he did want to tell me; but thought I still had other feelings for him? Which I did, but that was beside the point! He wasn't supposed to know that! What if he didn't want to tell me because he was afraid it would make me upset or jealous?

Would it? I couldn't help but ask; and I was sad when the answer came to me quickly. Yes.

But I couldn't let Jake know that. I had to let him know that I was fine with whatever he wanted to do with any other girl. I had to let him know that I wasn't going to get upset or anything. It was the least I could do for him. How did I let him know that? How did I tell him I wasn't bothered at _all_ that he may or may not be dating another girl?

I pondered this while sitting next to Jake in our Literature class, all the while feeling sicker and sicker as the thought of them together grew stronger; and by the end of class I hadn't come up with anything other than just plainly asking Jake about the girl. Though I wasn't satisfied with that answer, it was too easy for it to back fire on me. What if he thought that I was trying to be noisy and just wanting to know all about his relationship with this girl? I didn't want something like that to happen.

The bell rang and I got up and followed Jake out of the class. I was still trying to think of some way to make Jake believe that I wasn't going to be upset by his maybe new relationship with the girl from his Biology class. I was so focused on my thoughts I was surprised when Jake's voice floated into my head.

"I've got to go do something; I'll see you after lunch; ok?"

Shocked I froze up for a second, my thoughts about the girl gone for the moment. What was he talking about? We always walked to lunch and to our classes together. What was he going to do? After a few seconds I realized he was still waiting for my reply. I mentally shook myself and said. "Yeah, ok. See you later."

Jake smiled and started off at a faster pace, not turning when I did as I headed off to the cafeteria. What the heck was he doing?

Feeling strangely empty I walked up to where the rest on my family was waiting for me; but even when I reached them, I still felt as though something was missing.

"Hey where's Jake?" Alice asked looking around me a worried and irritated look on her face.

I shrugged. "I don't know. He said he had something to do and that he would see me aft-" I paused as Jake's words echoed in my head. _'after'_ lunch? What was he going to be doing during lunch? He loved lunch! It was his favorite time of the day. "-er lunch." I finished after a pause that all my family caught. Feeling as though they were seeing right through my face and into the very workings of my thoughts I looked down to the floor and walked past them. I could feel them walking with me, but was relieved when none of them questioned me. I wasn't sure how I felt right now and didn't feel like talking about my unstable life.

I sat down with my family and for once I did just as they did when they were in public; pushed the food around my plat, never once actually taking a bite. I watched the cafeteria doors like a hawk; wondering if Jake would finish whatever he was doing earlier than he thought he would and come eat. I was so baffled by his sudden leaving. What was more important than eating to him? I thought I knew that answer, I guess not.

I was extremely surprised when I saw Jake walk in three minutes later; well whatever he had done hadn't taken nearly as long as he thoug-

My thoughts were cut off when I saw that he hadn't walked through the doors alone. It was the girl he walked to class, and she had Jake's hand clasped in her's as they made their way to the lunch line.

I watched and a cold feeling washed over me; colder than anything the weather could have made me feel. I sat frozen in place watching as they walked slowly through the line Jake smiling as he talked to the girl. I noticed with some envy that she was rather tall, even though she only came up to Jake's shoulder that was still saying something. I only barely reached Jake's chest.

I watched for another minute as they got all they were going to eat and headed off to a table somewhere in the middle of the room. I felt the tears starting to build as the cold feeling seemed to intensify making me feel like an ice cube.

He walked with her to class, he went to go meet her after her classes to walk with her, he sat with her at lunch. She was taking my Jacob away from me.

* * *

Jacob's POV

Why hadn't Nessie said or asked anything about Miley? Was she trying to drive me insane? I had walked Miley right down Nessie's hallway everyday for the past three days; and yet nothing. It was like she hadn't noticed us at all. Because if she had wouldn't she have said something to me? Wouldn't Nessie want to know who this girl was that I was spending my time with?

Maybe she really hadn't seen me; it was possible. Just very unlikely.

I thought about this as I walked next to Nessie after our Literature class. What was I supposed to do now? If she didn't know I 'liked' Miley how was this going to work? Of course she would know Saturday, but I it didn't feel right that she find out the night of our first date. I shivered at the thought, my first date with _Miley_. Plus the sooner she found out the sooner we could break down this wall that had come up between us. The sooner we could be friends again.

Sighing I went back to the problem at hand, I needed Nessie to see us together. How did I do that? I thought walking by her class would do it; but it wasn't. I needed something more obvious.

What would that be though? I thought about for another minute before the answer came to me. I needed to do something Nessie couldn't help but notice; like maybe sit with someone other than the family for lunch… yeah, that would probably work.

Thinking fast I turned to Nessie. "I've got to go do something; I'll see you after lunch ok?"

I saw the shock fly across her face as she froze for a second; good. That was what I needed. It took Nessie a second to answer. "Yeah, ok. See you later."

I tried to smile once before I turned and started walking quickly in the direction of Miley's last class; which I only knew because she seemed to want me to know where she was going to be every second of everyday. I had felt a little bad about using Miley's feeling like this; it was wrong and I knew it. But after the first day after I had asked her to the dance she had made it pretty clear about how shallow she was. And I got the impression that she only wanted me as an ornament to hang off her arm; so I didn't feel _too_ bad. She used me to look good and I used her to make Nessie think I had moved on; simple.

I hadn't quite reach Miley's classroom when I saw her walking down the hallway, coming my way. I slowed down and made my way to her.

"Why, Jacob this is a nice surprise." Miley said a smile coming onto her face as her eyes darted around the hallway, more than a few people were looking our way. More than likely wanting to know what a Cullen would be doing in this hallway when everyone knew that we went straight from our classes to the cafeteria. No exceptions. "What do you want?"

I smiled as best as I could. "Well I thought I could walk with you to lunch and maybe sit with you?" I said, making it sound more like a question; even though I already knew her answer.

Her eyes lightened. "Perfect!" She said before looking around once more. Stepping to me she took my hand in her's; it was long and thin with slender fingers that were wrapped around my hand. As soon as her hand was in mine I wanted it gone; it felt so wrong and strange. And the only thing that was in my mind was how I wished the hand I was holding now was much smaller one with small strong fingers.

But it wasn't, and I swallowed back the lump in my throat as I walked down the hallway before we reached the cafeteria. I wanted to look my best and happiest when, hopefully, Nessie saw us walk through the doors.

I pushed through the doorway and asked Miley. "What kinds of movies do you like?" I hoped she said something besides chick-flick. I had watched a few, and had even enjoyed some of them. But each one that I had watched was with Nessie. Because she had asked me to watch them with her. I didn't want to watch them with anyone else.

Miley looked up at me smiling. "Well I'm always up for a love story."

I started to groan but realized it and coughed to cover it up. Once I had finished 'coughing' I nodded. "Ok, I'll see what I can find that's playing Saturday." Go figure.

Miley giggled. "Aw thanks Jacob."

I forced a smile and was glad when we reached the food giving me an excuse to focus on something else for a few minutes. Once we had made it through the line I let Miley lead me to some table in the middle of the room. As I set my tray down next to her's I peeked up to the table across the room and met a pair of brown shocked eyes. I quickly looked back down as I sat down. It hurt too much to look into those eyes. I was introduce to some people that I hadn't noticed that I was sitting with, but didn't remember their names seconds after they were given to me. I had barely started eating when I saw something move from the 'Cullen' table. I wasn't sure how I could know that it was from that table; there was so much movement throughout the hall I shouldn't have been able to tell, but I knew. I peeked up again and saw that Nessie had suddenly rose from the table and walked, almost jogged out of the cafeteria; leaving everyone else at the table staring after her.

I looked back at the table and was met by a scary set of eyes that had such an anger in them I was shocked.

I could feel Alice's glare on me for the rest of lunch though I never looked back over to the table after that. I was relieved when lunch ended and I walked with Miley out of the cafeteria.

What was going on with Alice? Had I done something for her to be mad at me about? I couldn't think of anything… but then again, it was Alice, maybe she was mad for something I was _going_ to do. But still, what could I do that would make her that angry at me? I mean if I was planning on pouring paint over her new wardrobe or something then I would understand. But I wasn't that stupid. Was I?

I still wasn't sure by the time I reached Biology.

* * *

I waved bye to Miley and turned away from her before I sighed. I didn't think this part of the day would come. Maybe this wasn't the most brilliant thing I had ever thought up before. After spending a whole class trying to keep far enough away from Miley so that she wouldn't rub her leg up against mine or rest her hand on my knee; yet seem like I didn't mind when she did do that was enough to give me the heebie-jeebies.

I walked toward the gym thankful that we didn't share this class; thankful we only shared that one class! I didn't think I could do it if I had to spend another second with her than I already was. And there was still Saturday to think about!

I was shaking my head, wondering what on earth I had gotten myself into when I walked into the gym. I realized that I was a little late and most everyone was in the locker rooms already, except two people who were sitting on the bleachers on the far side of the gym talking. I recognized the short girl imminently; but not the boy Nessie was talking to. I thought about joining them, but then I wasn't sure if I was ready to begin telling her about me and my new happy relationship; so instead I kept walking and made my way to the lock rooms.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I couldn't stand to watch them. And when I met Jake's eyes when he had glanced up for that half second I had seen the anxiety and uncertainty; as if he was waiting for my reaction. I didn't want him to see me freak out, or cry. I wasn't even sure how I was taking it; but I knew it wasn't good. So I didn't the first thing that came to my mind; I ran out of the cafeteria.

I wasn't sure where to run so I ran to my next class which was empty and sat down in the far desk in the corner of the room. I waited there 'til the bell rang and people started filing into the room and taking seats. I strangely didn't feel anything about Jake while I waited; just an odd numbness. I sat with this feeling over me as the room around me filled up.

I don't know when the class started, or if it did. It didn't matter at the moment anyway. All I could do was sit and know that I was losing something more than I could understand. But something so important. Vital to my living.

I only became aware of what was happening around me when the bell rang and even then I still felt cold. I fumbled getting my books into my bag and walked out of the classroom and started down the hallway; not thinking twice about leaving Bethany behind.

When I reached the gym I was early; so early that there were still people from the last class that were still heading off to the locker rooms to change back into their normal clothes.

Not really sure what else to do I walked up to the empty bleaches to sit down. I was about to sit on the first seat when I noticed that there was someone else sitting on the other side of the mettle bench. It was that boy I had met a couple times. Justin was his name; right?

Not thinking further I walked up and sat next to him. "Hey."

He looked up at me startled, he must not have heard me come up to him; stupid vampire trait. He looked at me with wide eyes and pale face. "Hi."

Neither of us said anything after that; the cold feeling was starting to take over again and I could feel the numbness leaking into my limbs.

"A-a-are you a-a-aright?" I faintly heard Justin ask with a stutter.

I shook my head; answering him and trying to shake off this feeling at the same time. "I just found something out that was a little shocking." I said softly, I barely recognized the sound of my own voice.

Justin looked down at his feet. "Sorry. Y-y-you don't have to t-tell me anything if you don't want t-t-to."

I wasn't sure what came over me, but somewhere inside me I felt an urge to share this someone. To tell someone about what was happening; someone that hadn't known me since I was born and would just listen as I rambled. The feeling startled me, I had never really wanted to share anything with anyone besides Jake before; but what surprised me even more was when I heard myself speak.

"I just found out that Jake likes another girl. I have no idea who she is and he won't tell me about her. I think that's because he knows I like him and doesn't want to get me upset. But I told him that all I wanted was to be friends with him. But I guess he can see right through me." I sighed and kept staring off into nothing. I have no idea why I was telling this stranger about my problems, but there was something soothing about finally being completely truthful with someone. Even if that person barely knew me and probably had absolutely no idea what I was talking about.

"J-jake is-s-s the tall t-tan one; right-t?" Justin asked.

"Yep." How could I talk to him so easily? I must not be thinking at all.

We didn't say anything else as people started filing into the building while the last class left. Still neither of us made a move; I wasn't sure why until I saw Jake walk into the guys locker room. Now I could go without having to worry about bumping into him. After another few minutes I got up and before I turned away I shook Justin's hand. "Thanks for listening. You're a really nice person."

Justin nodded. "Ok-k-kay."

It wasn't 'til after I had changed into my gym clothes that I started to wonder about my sanity. I had just told a person I barely knew about my biggest secret; a person that happened to be Garrett's best friend. Justin would probably tell Garrett about my little episode and then Garrett would tell the rest of the school; then I wouldn't have any way to keep it from Jake.

But even as this thought was forming, I wasn't sure I believed it. There was something about Justin I liked; and something about him made me believe that he wouldn't tell anyone.

I just hoped I was right.

* * *

**Hello! I know it's been such a long time! And I'm so sorry! My computer has been and still is broken. I am using my friends to upload right now! But I hope you will forgive me! I am trying to get it fixed, it's just taking longer than I thought! Anywho I hope you enjoy this chapter.....AND THE NEXT!!!  
**


	17. Chapter 17 Dates and Nightmares

Chapter 16 Dates and Nightmares

Jacob's POV

It was now Saturday and Nessie still hadn't brought up anything about Miley. I was starting to wonder if I should. But I didn't want to do anything suspicious. Would it be weird if I brought up another girl when Nessie thought I loved her? I wasn't sure.

I sat in my room lying on my bed staring at my ceiling, feeling miserable. The last couple of days felt as if a lifetime had passed. The days seemed to drag by at an impossibly slow rate. I knew it was because I was spending my time fighting my instincts that told me to run from Miley; and fighting myself by staying away from Nessie.

I hoped she didn't think I was being stand offish. I just didn't want her to see through my thin mask of lies. I figured she would come to me when she was ready anyway. After she realized I _wasn't_ in love with her. That was just taking longer than I thought it would.

Groaning I rolled myself up to a sitting position and put my face in my hands, my elbows on my knees. I was driving myself CRAZY! What was I thinking when I thought up this insane plan?!? I must be suicidal and just not know it! Because I was pretty sure if I had to spend much more time with Miley, or have to let her put her hand on my leg one more time, or be without hearing the sound of Nessie's laughter for one more day; I might just kill myself!

Maybe I could handle this if I _could _hear Nessie's laughter, see her smile, watch her as she watched a movie, put my arm around her as we watched a scary movie, stare into her intense brown-goldish eyes; any of those things would have made this much easier. But I was afraid she would realize what I was up to if I talk to her too much. That she would ask the wrong question and get the truth out of me. I couldn't let that happen.

Because I was doing this for her. I just had to remember that. And then I could keep doing this. I could go out with _Miley_ and smile and pretend that was what I wanted; to be with Miley; and I could hide that all I really wanted was to put my arms around Nessie and for her to want the same.

"Come on, you can do this; it's only for a little while anyways. I mean she can't live forever." I grumbled so softly I knew no one in the house would hear me.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

He still hadn't told me anything about the girl. He had walked her to her classroom and sat with her and her friends everyday for lunch and still hadn't mentioned her. It was like she didn't even exist.

And while everyone was looking forward to our week vacation that started tomorrow; all I could do was wonder about this girl, and keep myself from crying all the time.

Every day after school instead of hanging out with Jake, like we used to, I would go straight up to my room, do my homework, eat sometimes, and roam around in my room. I couldn't even sleep anymore. I had now gone three days without sleep. Don't get me wrong, I had tried; really I did. But every night I would climb into bed and would just lie there. Some nights I wouldn't move until the next morning, others I would roll around, barely able to keep still at all; but sleep never came. And I was really starting to feel the effects of those sleepless nights. I had always wondered how long I could go without sleep. But I guess that was one thing I didn't inherit from my father; because I could feel my eyelids dropping as I sat in my overstuffed chair, and the things in my room starting to get blurry. But still I couldn't fall asleep.

Yawning I looked down at the book in my hands; Jane Eyre. I had read it a couple times before, I liked it and since I had been staying in my room mostly these days I figured one more time couldn't hurt anyone. But as I started reading it the words ran together making up new words as I read them.

After a few minutes I sighed closing the book and dropping it to the floor in front of my chair. I sat for a few minutes before my mind turned again to the mystery girl. I felt like yelling to the ceiling. Who was she?! Why wouldn't Jake just tell me about her? Why didn't he feel the way I did about him?! Why was life so unfair?!

Finally I jumped to my feet and rushed to my closet and grabbed my ice-skates that Jasper had given me. After pulling on a jacket and slinging my skates over my shoulder I rushed down the stairs to the second floor. I looked around the living room but no one was there and so I went down the hall and knocked on mom and dad's door.

"Come in."

I opened the door and found mom and dad sitting on the floor facing each other. "Hey; I didn't mean to interrupt anything." I said walking up to them and kissing their cheeks in turn.

Dad shook his head. "Of course not. Is there anything we could do for you?"

I nodded. "Well I was wondering if you would come ice-skating with me?" I asked feeling a smile forming on my face. "Jasper showed me this great place and I want to show it to you both!"

Mom smiled brightly. "I think that would be a great idea. I haven't been ice-skating in a while now."

Dad also smiled. "Perfect." They got to their feet and after rummaging around in their closet for a while they found their own skates and we headed out.

I took one of mom's hands and one of dad's as I lead them to where Jasper had taken me. It was strange, it seemed like so long ago that Jasper had taken me there for the first time, but it was only a little over a week ago. It seemed an impossible thought; it felt like a lifetime ago. But I pushed the thought aside as I ran through the forest and stopped when the pond came into view.

"Jasper sure knows how to pick them." Dad said looking around happily. Though I was sure he had seen it in Jasper's mind; Alice had said that he had really wanted to show me this place. But still he looked around as though he hadn't.

"He sure does." I said smiling. I walked over to the same rock that I had sat on last time and changed from my shoes to my skates; mom and dad doing the same on either side of me.

As soon as I had my skates tied I stepped onto the pond and started gliding over the smooth surface. Mom was the first to join me; coming up next to me and taking my hand. We skated for a while, just making large rounds around the edge of the pond.

"This is really beautiful Renesmee. Thank you for showing it to me."

"Of course I wanted to share this with you." I said looping my arm through her's.

We did a couple more laps before I started to wonder what happened to dad. I looked around and found him standing at the bank of the pond, right where I had left him, watching mom and I.

I waited 'til we were closer and asked him. "Aren't you going to join us?"

He didn't move right away, but stared for another minute before getting to his feet and skating over to meet us. When he was close he took my free hand and kissed my forehead. "You have grown so much. You look so much like your mother." He said practically whispering.

I looked up and smiled. That was the first time he had ever told me something like that. "Thanks dad." I said giving him a hug. He hugged me back, and I had the strangest feeling that if he could have cried he would have.

Once we pulled back we all started around the pond together, still holding hands; it was perfect. I hadn't realized how much I had missed them over the past couple of weeks. Just sitting with them, talking, anything really. I felt more at ease with them around me and was glad to be temporarily distracted from my whirlwind of thoughts and emotions.

I could let myself smile and just ignore all my thoughts about Jake at the moment; and that's what I did.

* * *

I don't know how long we were there; again time seemed to just flow differently while I was there. But after a while, after circling the pond and then seeing who could do the most spins in one jump. Then having an all out snowball fight beore I started to get really tired.

So even though I didn't really want to; dad picked up all our skates and we made our way back to the house, though much slower than the trip there. As we walked I leaned my head on mom's shoulder and closed my eyes knowing that she wouldn't let me run into a tree or anything. But as we got closer to the house my thought turned to the reason that I had to leave in the first place.

Jake. I missed him; so badly that it hurt. We hadn't even had a real conversation in a couple days! I missed talking to him, being around him. I missed hearing him say my name, or just watching him get killed while playing video game.

I missed him. Even more than I thought possible.

I felt like this for the rest of the walk home and when we finally walked into the warm house I took my skates and asked if we could have a family movie time. After they agreed with smiling faces I headed up to my room where I dropped my skates and coat. I was about to head back, but I stopped in my hallway. I looked down the hall, at the other door where there was light coming from the crack between the door and the floor.

My heart ached as I looked at that closed door. I missed him.

Without another thought, or maybe no thought at all, I started for the door. After knocking I held my hands tightly behind my back and waited for the door to open.

Which it did, and showed Jake standing in the doorway wearing a pair of dark jeans and a grey long sleeved shirt that fit him snugly. He looked good. And surprised.

"Hey, what's up?" He asked eyes wide.

Not sure what to say I shrugged. "Uh, I just thought, um…." I mumbled. What was wrong with me? This was Jake, the one that I had known forever. And here I was getting tongue tied over this?! No. So squaring my shoulders I looked up right into Jake's eyes. "We are going to watch a movie downstairs and I thought, well since we haven't seen all that much of each over lately you would want to join us?" I said in a rush before my courage tapped out.

Jake looked down at me before looking back somewhere in him room. "Uh," He turned back to me. "well, I can watch some of the movie, but I can't stay for the whole thing. I've got a date tonight."

What?

"Oh, ok, well you don't have to, I mean if you want to come watch the part that you can then leave when you have to, that's fine." I said, though I'm not sure how I got the words out, because the only thing that I was thinking was: What?

Jake smiled a small smile. "Sure, I'll be down in a minute."

I nodded and turned away from the door and headed down to the second floor.

What?

I couldn't think anything else. What? A date? Tonight? _What?_

I sat down on the chair as dad and mom look through our movie selection.

What? The words he had spoken to me didn't make since, they didn't add up.

After a while mom and dad must have picked out a movie because they sat down and Alice and Jasper joined us. But I barely noticed them.

What?

A couple minutes later Jake walked down the stairs and he sat on the floor leaning against the couch. I finally made myself focus on him, it really wasn't that hard. I looked over at him and took in what he was wearing again. Dark jeans with a grey shirt that I had never seen him wear before that hugged his body showing off how ripped he really was. His hair was pulled back into a ponytail and he was wearing a pair of dark shoes that I had also never seen before.

What?

He was going on a date.

With a girl.

With not me.

All this suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks and I sucked in a deep breath.

I sat in a sudden numb like state 'til Jake got to his feet about half way through the movie and said he had to get going. He said bye to everyone and headed down the stairs; somehow taking a part of me with him.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I stayed as long as I could before I knew I would be late. I wasn't looking forward to what I had to do tonight, but I knew I had to. So after five minutes after when I was supposed to leave I got to my feet and after waving bye to everyone I headed out of the house and to the garage. I had talked to Carelie earlier, and he had no problems when I had told him that I had no intentions with bringing this girl to the house or getting all that close to her. I think he somehow knew of my plan. I don't know how he could know that, but something in the way he looked at me while I talked to him in his office made it impossible for me to think differently.

I hopped into my car and started her up, listening to the soft purring of the engine for a moment before pulling out of the driveway.

* * *

We had just reached the movie and already I was about to bite Miley's head off. I had taken her to a small Café called Angela's to eat; we were seated at a small table by the window of the place and were given two small menus. All through dinner Miley talked a hundred words a minute about nothing important; mostly other people's business. I tried to listen, thinking maybe if I tried hard enough I wouldn't completely die of boredom. But as I sat there listening to her chatter, all I wanted to do was reach out and strangle her.

All through dinner I did my best to smile and act like I had nothing on my mind but Miley. But as the night wore on and we made our way to the theater my mind moved onto other things. Mostly Nessie; and how much I would love to take Nessie out on a date.

I could just imagine what all I would do for her; where we would go, what we would eat. What I was doing with Miley was nothing compared to what I would love to do with Nessie. I hadn't put any thought into this date, it was just the first thing that came to my mind; but if it had been Nessie that I was with tonight, the night would have been far more planned out.

I just couldn't make myself care about how tonight went. I bought Miley's and my tickets for some chick flick I had found that was playing online. Miley held my hand as we made our way to our screen and we walked into the darkened room. I let her decided were to sit, she picked the back row. I would have picked the 5th row from the front; and I know Nessie would have picked the same if she was here with me.

I didn't understand why anyone would want to sit in the back, wasn't the reason to come see a movie in the theater was to get the full effect by being able to look out and see nothing but what was on the screen in front of you? Oh well. I wasn't really looking forward to the movie all that much anyway.

The lights had just turned off completely, signaling the start of the movie when I felt a hand slide its way onto m thigh. I nearly jumped out of my seat at the touch, but luckily stayed where I was. I looked down and found Miley's hand resting on my leg.

Oh jeez.

Not knowing what to do I just left the hand sitting there and turned my attention to the screen where the movie had started.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I didn't even try to watch the second half of the movie. I was to wrapped in my thoughts to give the TV any attention. I think mom noticed, but she didn't say anything. I was glad, because I don't know what I would have told her if she had asked me what was bothering me.

Jake; my Jacob, was out on a date right now. A date with a girl from school. A human. Was he going to pull a dad on me? Did Jake plan to tell her all about us and himself? Was he willing to do that to be with her?

These and about a hundred other questions flew around my head as I sat through the movie.

Once it was over mom got to her feet and kneeled down in front of my seat, facing me.

"Hey, do you want me to make you something to eat?" She asked, her eyes soft and golden; it was as if they were telling me they understood my pain. But I knew she didn't. How could she understand? Had she ever thought dad didn't want her the way she wanted him? No. Okay, maybe she did, but we weren't in the same boat at all! She had thought dad just didn't love her anymore, I know Jake doesn't like me the way I do him, AND I have to pretend to be okay with being just friends with him! Even if mom could understand, there was nothing she could do to help; and I didn't really have the energy to try and tell her about all that was happening.

So I shook my head. "I'm not really hungry." I mumbled. "I think I'm just going to head off to bed." I got to my feet and headed up the stairs, not waiting for any reply.

* * *

Jacob's POV

Only fifteen minutes left in the movie! I was so excited I could have laughed out loud. But I kept my joy inside and tried to focus on the movie.

But only a minute later my mind was abruptly brought back to the hand that had been on my leg for the entire movie, the one that hadn't moved since it was put there.

It had moved, and not in the way I would have liked.

Miley's fingers started doing a small circular pattern of the inside of my thigh, moving slowly up my leg.

I almost snapped her wrist in half as I reached down and grabbed her hand. Thinking through the red that was building behind my eyes I brought Miley's hand to my mouth and kissed it. Was she insane? Had she really been trying to do what I think she had?! On a first date?!

I was more than relieved when the credits started rolling and I got to my feet, pulling Miley up behind me.

Maybe that's why people sit in the back row at the movies…

* * *

Miley talked nonstop on the ride back to her house, which was good, because I was in no mood to try and make conversation with her. So I let her blabber on and on about who knows what, while I tried to not think about how I would have to do this again soon. That's what people who dated did right; they saw each other throughout the week right? Miley would be expecting it; but more importantly so would Nessie.

Once I dropped Miley off at her house, without kissing her goodnight, though I knew she wanted me to, I raced away from the sight of her. I felt like throwing up for the rest of forever then ever having to go on another date with Miley ever again.

As I tried not to think of the nights horrifying events my thoughts turned to Nessie. I thought of the picture I had seen when I had first realized I was in love with her. I knew it was stupid to bring it up again, but I couldn't help it at the moment. It was just such a beautiful sight; I couldn't keep the image away.

I let it flood my head as I drove home; feeling strangely at peace while I looked on at Nessie and me, with our baby. It was like I was no longer driving the car as I thought of this, but was the one hold Nessie as she held our baby. It was like my fantasy had become my reality and my reality just some awful nightmare.

I dwelled in the picture for as long as my mind would let me; but after some time I was drawn back to myself, only leaving the longing for the future I knew I would never have.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

_I was running through an empty hallway at school. I was running as fast as I could trying to get somewhere. I had to get there. I wasn't sure why but I knew it was important. I knew it deep in my heart; something was calling out to me telling me I had to get to this place. I followed the hallway, feeling as though I was barely moving even though I was running as fast as I could; so fast that my breathing came in short pants. I kept running 'til I was standing outside a closed door, leading into a classroom._

I stood in front of the door, staring at it. I wasn't sure why, but suddenly I was afraid; very afraid. My hand shook as I raised it to the door knob. The metal was cold on my skin; but I didn't try to open the door. My heart thudded in my chest so hard that it hurt. I knew what ever was behind this door was important; even if I didn't know what it was. Taking a deep breath I turned the knob. The door swung out of my hand, flying open.

_There weren't any lights on in the room and I couldn't see anything. Which was odd; just because there wasn't any light I should have been able to see something. But it was like a blackness had covered the room, trying to hide what was in it. I flipped the light switch on, but nothing happened, I tried a couple more times, but the lights weren't working._

_Feeling compelled by some unone force I walked into the darkness. The second I stepped into the room everything behind be disappeared, the hallway fell away, leaving only darkness. I turned around trying to find something; anything! But there was nothing!_

_My breathing became ragged as I started to panic. What was this place? I kept turning around, hoping with everything in me that I would find something besides the nothingness_ _that surrounded me._

_Suddenly I thought I caught something out of the corner of my eye. Like a flickering candle. But that was enough for me. I broke into a run in the direction that I had seen it. The light became brighter and brighter. And I saw that it was a beam of light, like a spot light, shining down at something too far away for me to make out what it was. It looked like a person. Relief rushed through me. I wasn't alone! I ran to the spot where the person stood. It was a person! No wait, two people! I ran a little further happiness filling me; but then it fled out of my body a second later. When I saw who the people were._

_Jake. And that girl he had been talking to. The one from his biology class. This was his biology class room. And they were standing in the middle of the light, together. The_ _nameless girls hands were holding Jake's face down towards her's. And Jake's arms were wrapped around her back, holding her to him. Their lips locked together._

_The breath was gone from my body, the happiness, the relief of not being alone was gone from me. I felt an aching in my chest like I had never felt before. It burned so bad I couldn't even stand! I fell to the ground where I was, I put my hands over the spot where the fire burned. But it wasn't a fire that I could put out. It blazed hotter as I laid there. It was unbearable! I had to stop it! Someone had to stop it! Even if that meant killing me._

_There was only one person to call out to. Jake. Then again who else would I call out to? I choked out his name; but I knew he would hear me. He was a werewolf. But he didn't break his contact with the girl he was with. The burning was getting worse! I cried his name again; louder this time. But he still didn't look up._

_No._

_He was supposed to be my best friend! He was supposed to be there for me! Forever!_

But he wasn't…

No…

He had left me.

_NO!_

"RENESMEE!"

My eyes flew open and I shot upwards. My breathing was ragged to say the best. It was hard and uneven. I looked around frantically. Where was I?! Where was Jake?

"Renesmee! It's ok! It was just a nightmare." I heard someone say soothingly. I looked up and saw mom sitting next to my bed where I was sitting. "It's all over now. Don't worry everything is alright."

But everything wasn't alright. Where was Jake? "Jacob?!" I half choked, half whispered hoarsely. I didn't realize that I was crying 'til mom wiped a couple tears off my face.

She turned to look behind her, where dad Alice, and Jasper were standing. "I'll go." Alice said before disappearing out of my room.

I breathed in a ragged breath, trying to calm myself down, but I couldn't. Even Jasper's touch was having no effect.

"It's ok now. Baby you're safe now." Mom said brushing some hair I hadn't noticed out of my face.

I was shaking all over. I couldn't stop it. My body seemed to be shivering; and I was _cold_.

"Edward?!" Mom called out his name sounding worried. I wanted to tell her that everything was ok, that she didn't need to worry., but I couldn't make myself do it. It wouldn't have been true anyway.

"Jake?!" I called loudly. Where was he?! He wasn't here!

He wasn't here with me.

I was alone.

"JACOB!" I screamed as loud as I could. Everything in the room was blurred by tears. They fell down my face, and I didn't bother to wipe them away. They didn't matter; nothing mattered without Jacob!

Where was Jake? I needed him!

"Nessie?" My head snapped up. Jake was standing in the doorway, looking at me, shock and worry written all over his face. "Nessie?"

"Jake!" I whispered. He was here! He hadn't left me! I held out my arms for him and he was there in a second. I wrapped my arms around his neck holding on as tightly as I could and started crying harder.

Gently Jacob rubbed small circles on my back, while speaking softly to me. "It's ok. I'm here now. Everything is alright."

I cried hard into his neck, not caring that my entire family was probably watching, not caring that I was soaking Jake's shirt, I just had to hold him. I needed Jake to hold me. To be here. With me.

I needed him with me.

Forever.

I loved him.

* * *

YAY! I know I've never updated two chapters at once! But there is more to come!!! PLEASE REVIEW!!


	18. Chapter 18 Unbreakable

Chapter 17 Comforts and New Sleeping Arrangements

Jacob's POV

I pulled into the driveway and turned off the car; but I didn't get out. I wasn't ready to face the family, wasn't ready to face Nessie; I needed to calm down before I tried to do that.

My feeling were raging in all different directions, from sadness to confusion, to anger, and back to sadness.

Sadness that Nessie didn't love me the way I loved her.

Confusion that I couldn't just be happy with just being her friend, and wondering how my life suddenly got so out of control.

Anger at the world and fate that I would fall in love with a girl and not being able to show that love. That I would have to spend my time with a girl that I couldn't stand, instead of being with Nessie.

And then sadness that I wouldn't ever be able to go back to what I had before all this happened.

So knowing I wasn't ready to put on the happy face of a person who just came home from the perfect date, I sat in my car; staring off into the darkness of the night. I saw a light flicker on at the far end of the house and I looked up. It was Nessie's room.

I could barely see anything from this angle, so hopping of the car I took off, passing the house in a few seconds and looked back up at the room; that was better. I had good vision, so I could make out most of everything going on. Bella was kneeling down beside the bed, shaking Nessie awake. Why would she be doing that? Everyone else was standing in the doorway, watching in concern. What was going on? I stood rigid in my place, had something happened. I watched as Nessie jerked up in the bed looking like she was in pain. The look on her face brought pain to my chest and I sucked in a deep breath. What had happened?

Bella was saying something, but even with my excellent hearing there was no way I could hear it from this distance, let alone there was a wall in the way. She looked panicked; and I could see Nessie was shaking all over. Was she ok? I faintly heard Bella call out Edward's name in a panicked voice as she looked over her shoulder. I then saw someone, Alice disappear from the doorway.

The next second I felt myself being pulled forward. "What the heck!?"

"Hurry! You have to come inside!" Alice said pulling harder on my arm.

Confused I started running with her. "What's going on?!" What was happening with Nessie? I couldn't see her room anymore.

"It's Nessie-" Alice was cut off by a scream. One that I don't think I'll ever be able to forget. It was a terror ridden scream. A scream that would haunt me for the rest of forever.

"JACOB!?"

At the sound of the scream I froze in place for a 4th of a second before I ran, blowing past Alice, into the house, everything becoming a blur as I ran faster than I ever had before. I was lucky that everyone had moved farther into Nessie's room, because I would have knocked them all down in my hurry.

Everything was like I had last seen it through the window, but now I could see Nessie's red face, and the tears spilling down her face. The sight broke my heart into a million pieces. "Nessie?" I called softly; I had no idea what had happened, I didn't know what to do. What could I do? I had to do something! "Nessie?" I called out again; praying she would tell me to do something, anything she asked me right now I knew without even thinking that I would do it.

"Jake!" Nessie's eyes darted upward and locked with mine. We held each other's gaze; and I saw something in them I had never seen before. But I couldn't dwell on what it was because the next second she opened her arms for me; and I rushed forward. I pulled Nessie to me as I sat down, pulling her onto my lap. I felt her arms tighten around my neck and I knew she was holding as tight as she could. Normally I would have told her it hurt; but I didn't dare say anything like that now. I couldn't care anyway. All I could think of at the moment was calming Nessie down.

I felt her tears soaking through my shirt and started rubbing her back. "It's ok." I said, not sure what else I could. "I'm here now. Everything is alright.

Nessie continued to cry for a while. I don't really know for how long; it didn't matter. But after a while everyone started quietly leaving the room. The last of all being Edward. I looked up and was met with a painful expression. And in that moment I felt like a mind reader. I knew what he was feeling and thinking right at that moment. Don't tell me how, maybe it was just written on his face. But right then I knew he was looking at his daughter and realizing that she wasn't so small anymore; that she had grown up before his very eyes and was now a woman. That she didn't need him and depend on him as much as she once had.

He looked at us for a minute before nodding to himself and walking away.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I have no idea how long I cried; but after some time I think my eyes ran out of tears to shed and I was left dry sobbing. I was feeling so much all at once I couldn't think straight! Jake was here! He _did_ come to me when I needed him! But I also realized something so shocking it kept me crying longer than I would have if I hadn't realized it. I was in love with Jacob Black. I loved him. It seemed so simple I was surprised that I hadn't realized it sooner. But with this realization came a pain so profound, I shed more tears, even after I had none left! Because he was still with someone else. Even if my nightmare wasn't wholly true, it had truth in it. No matter how you sliced it, Jake had still gone out on a date tonight with another girl.

After some time I finally calmed down enough to try to take in a deep breath. It was more difficult than I thought it would be. Hiccupping once I loosened my death grip on Jake's neck and laid my head on his chest.

I knew I probably shouldn't; that I should just climb out of his lap and sit next to him; but I also knew Jake wouldn't say anything about it right now. He was too nice of a guy to say something like that while I had just bawled my eyes out. Was it so bad that I just needed him to hold me for a while?

Jake didn't say anything while I had this verbal battle with myself inside my head. I knew he was waiting on me; waiting 'til I was ready to talk.

Not sure what to say I sighed. "Sorry for getting your shirt all wet."

There was a pause before I heard and felt, Jake laugh lightly. "Yeah, because that's what I'm really worried about at the moment."

I shrugged, but didn't say anything. What was I supposed to say? I didn't want to tell him I loved him. That would just make things worse. Things were already so funny between us; I didn't want to even think about throwing _that_ word into the mix would do.

"Nessie;" Jake's voice was soft, unsure. "what happened?"

Panicking I racked my brain for something; but came up empty.

"Nessie, please talk to me." He said, his voice was pleading.

Somehow my eyes started tearing up again; as I told him the only thing I could think of. The truth. He would just see through a lie anyways. "I dreamed that you were with that girl from your Biology class and that you fell in love with her and you left me behind. Then when I needed you, you weren't there anymore." I said in a whisper. "I dreamed that I didn't matter to you anymore."

I kept looking down 'til Jake put his hand under my chin and forced my head up. He looked me in the eyes and held them there. "That will never happen."

I wanted so badly to believe him. But I wasn't so sure anymore. "But what if this girl you went out with tonight is the one you want to bring into the family? To one day marry?"

Jake shook his head. "That wouldn't matter! Even if I do find some girl to marry one day I would always be here for you! No matter if I did end up with someone. You are my imprint. I will always be with you."

I knew I was sounding childish, but I couldn't help myself. He was supposed to be my Jacob. "But if you fall in love with someone you are going to put them first, they are going to need you, and you are going to be with them. You can't be with us both at the same time! If you have a wife you aren't going to be able to be with me forever!"The tears that I didn't have started sliding down my face.

Jake looked at me and smiled a small smile. "No. Because you are my imprint; you will always come first. No matter who else comes into my life! The ties between imprints is so strong they can't be broken or faded by anything! When I say I'll always be here; I mean it." He said wiping the tears from my face. "Nothing could ever come before you. It's hard to explain. It's like you are the center of every thought. Everything I do is somehow tied to you. Nothing even matters if it doesn't have to do with you."

I looked up into his face and knew he was telling the truth. Or what he thought was the truth. Sighing ducked my head back under his chin as Jake started rubbing my back again. I closed my eyes letting myself enjoy Jake's warmth and the feel of his hand on my back. "I've missed you." I mumbled without thinking.

Jake's hand paused for a second before continuing. "What do you mean?"

I screwed my eyes tightly shut. Stupid stupid! "I just haven't seen you much lately." I said, letting out a deep breath. "And even when we do see each other it's not like normal."

I felt the rise and fall of Jake's chest as he sighed. "I know. And I'm sorry; I'll try to do better." He said softly. "I've missed you too."

With nothing else to say I let myself relax again, as a feeling of contentment came over me. It felt like an eternity since I had been honest with Jake. It felt good. And Jake had missed me too. Something in knowing that set my heart beating loudly in my ears and brought a smile to my lips.

Neither of us said anything else for a long time; and after a while I could feel myself getting tired. Between all those sleepless nights and the wonderful feeling of Jake's arms around me; his warmth all about me made it impossible not to fall asleep. Soon it took a lot of effort to open my eyes and I could feel myself falling asleep; even though I didn't want to. I wanted to stay awake and sit here with Jake for as long as I could. But my body was already starting to shut down.

"Are you tired?" Jake asked me a couple minutes later after I had yawned. I nodded.

I felt and heard Jake's chest rumble as he chuckled; I couldn't help but smile at the sound. Then I felt Jake move under me, but I didn't open my eyes, I was still wrapped in Jake's warmth and was too comfortable. But a minute later when suddenly Jake's arms weren't around me my eyes popped open. No.

I was lying in bed, Jake still hovering over me, his hair spilling over his shoulders; as he pulled the covers over my body. I started to panic as Jake was finishing tucking me in; because once he was done he would leave. No!

I grabbed Jake's hand when he started to stand up straight. He looked down at me with questioning eyes. "What?"

And before I could think of what I was doing I blurted out in a low voice. "Please don't leave me. Stay with me." I sounded urgent in my own ears and I knew he could hear it too.

Jake stared down at me for a moment before he nodded and smiled down at me. "As you wish."

I sighed in relief as Jake went to turn out the light before making his way back to the bed. He pulled back the covers and slid into the bed next to me. I watched as he adjusted the covers around his body to his liking and rolled onto his side so that he was facing me. As soon as he was settled, I reached out and took his hand.

"Thank you." I whispered; my eyes already starting to droop, all of those sleepless nights crashing down on me. I was so tired I didn't even have the energy to feel the butterflies that had started in my stomach.

"There is nothing to thank me for." Was his reply and I was asleep, knowing no nightmare would be able to disturb me now.

* * *

I was somewhere between sleep and awake, trying to stay asleep; I had been dreaming something pleasant. though it was already starting to fade from my memory. I tried to catch onto it again, looking through my sleepy mind trying to find it; but I was waking up now and couldn't get back to it.

As I woke up I felt the warmth that was around me. I sighed; it was such an amazing feeling! I snuggled closer to the center of the warmth as I opened my eyes. I gasped out loud to what I saw.

Jake's bare chest.

He must have taken it off sometime last night. I looked up, with some difficulty and saw that Jake and I were facing each other on our sides. And the reason it was so hard for me to look up was because Jake had both his arms around me holding me tightly to him. The arm under me was under my head, like a makeshift pillow, while the other was wrapped all the way around me, pinning me to his chest. One of my own arms was around Jake's waist, while the other was folded up pinned between our bodies.

Not that I minded.

In this position I got the full blast of Jake's body heat, not to mention he wasn't wearing a shirt; he must have taken it off last night after I fell asleep. I knew he hated sleeping in anything other than some cut off sweats. Smiling I snuggled closer to Jake's chest and closed my eyes; hoping I could memorize the way his arms felt around me. I felt so small inside his large arms, so protected. I loved the feeling. And his scent! It was all I was breathing in! The smell of the forest, even though I knew he hadn't been out running in a while, he still carried the smell of the outdoors; it was just so natural. He smelled fresh. And for this moment, while we were lying like this; it wasn't hard to let myself believe that Jake loved me. My mind wondered and I imagined that I could watch Jake and wait for him to wake up. Then his eyes would open up and he would smile down at me and say: "Good morning love."

But I knew that it wasn't true; but that didn't mean that I couldn't enjoy this while it lasted... So with that in mind I snuggled even closer to Jake's chest and sighed.

* * *

Jacob's POV

The first thing I was aware of was an amazing smell, one that I knew well. One that I had taken deep, unnecessary breaths just to get in more of it. And it was close, real close.

I breathed in through my nose again before I opened my eyes. I immediately became aware that there was a body pressed against mine. Shocked I looked down and was pleasantly surprised to find it was Nessie's!

How had this miracle happened? It was just like the way I pictured it in my dreams. Nessie would be lying just like this, on her side facing me, in my arms, as close as she possibly could be, with a small smile on her lips. Her hair was spilled out over the pillow behind her head, leaving her whole face for me to drink in. She looked like an angel. And my eyes took in every inch of her face; from her smooth as stone forehead to her thin eyebrows; then to her lightly tinted purple eyelids, over her high cheek bones, to her button nose, then to her mouth that was curved up at the corners.

I gave myself another second to just look at her, to take in every inch of this scene, before making myself think about this.

What would Nessie say about this when she woke up? Would she think I was trying to take advantage of the situation?

Probably.

I tried to think of what to do; but I couldn't think of anything. That probably had something to do with that fact that I was lying in the most comfortable position ever and I had the woman I loved with me. But still, I knew that if I tried to move, I would probably wake Nessie up. She was the lightest sleeper ever. That may have to do with the fact that she was half vampire and that vampires couldn't sleep. But none the less I didn't' want to wake her up. I was pretty sure that she hadn't been sleeping well the past couple of nights, from the dark tint under her eyes and I wanted her to sleep as long as she possibly could.

So I happily went back to watching Nessie. I watched as her chest rose and fell with each breath, felt the air come out her nose and blow onto my chest. And I couldn't keep my eyes from combing over every inch of her face again. It had been so long since I had seen her this peaceful.

I could still remember when I had this chance every night; but it had been a while since Nessie start sleeping on her own. Sure she had had her own room since the beginning, but Nessie had never slept there. Except when she was really young, but then I had slept in the same room as her. I smiled remembering all the nights Nessie would come crawling into my room about ten minutes after she had been put to bed. She would come into my room and whisper my name once she reached the bed. Of course I had picked her up and tucked her in next to me.

I remembered the first time she had ever come into my room. I thought I had been hearing things at first, but when I heard Nessie's small voice calling out at me the second time I looked around and found her small form sitting next to my bed, looking up at me with sad eyes. "I can't sleep without you Jacob." She had said.

As soon as she said it I had smiled and scooted over in my bed to make room for her next to me. And every night for the next two years she had done the same thing. After the first month she didn't even need to say anything, I would always have the lamp on and would be waiting for her when she came.

And almost every morning I would wake up before her, with my arm thrown protectively over her, (I always had this fear that she would roll right out of the bed) and I would wake up and watch her, just waiting for her to wake up so my day could start.

But when she had gotten a little older she had wanted to start actually using her room so she stopped coming into mine.

So I enjoyed getting the chance to watch her like this again. Even if it was different now.

But I only got a few short moments of peace before the events of last night came flooding back into my head. What had led up to this moment.

The nightmare. Just the thought of it made me sad inside. I had put that thought into her head. I had made her think I was going to leave her for _Miley._ It was an impossible thought. But she had thought it.

I had to make sure she never questioned us again. I had to make sure she knew I would always be here for her. I could still pretend to be with Miley and show her that. I just had to figure out how to do it.

I was drawn out of my thoughts when I felt Nessie shift in my arms. I looked down quickly just as Nessie's eyes slowly opened.

She looked up at me with rested eyes. For a moment neither of us said anything and we just looked at each other. Again it was just like I dreamed it, and the way she was looking at me right now I could believe that this was a dream come true.

"Good morning." She said groggily before yawning. She stretched a little while she did, and I loosened my hold on her to allow her to move as I watched her nose scrunch up in the cutest way while she finished yawning.

"Good morning." I replied, I was sure I had a goofy smile on my face, but I couldn't help it. I had just had the most amazing night's sleep ever and woken up with Nessie to greet me. What could be better?

But then I remembered that this wasn't my dream, that this real life; and I pulled my arms from around Nessie.

She looked up at me. "Sorry." I mumbled, sitting up.

Nessie laughed and sat up too. "No thank you. That was the best night's sleep I've had in a while." She said with a breath taking smile.

I stared at her for a moment, suddenly forgetting how to breathe, or blink. "Well I'm glad, I slept pretty good myself." I had just opened my mouth to offer to make us breakfast when Nessie's bedroom door burst open.

I turned in the bed to see Alice standing in the doorway, beaming. "What are you two doing still in bed?!" She asked in a high voice, as if she were trying to sound mad, but wasn't quite succeeding. "Get dressed! Hurry!"

"What's up? Is the house on fire?" I asked laughing at my pitiful attempt at a joke.

Alice just rolled her eyes. "You guys better be thankful that I already packed your things with how far you two are behind! We have to get to the airport! It's vacation time!"

* * *

Okay, this is the last one for now; sorry. But I'm almost done with the next chapter and will hopefully be done with in the next little bit. Though don't be worried if I don't update in the next couple days because my pc will still most likely be broken. But I promise to update as soon as possible!!! Okay please review! God Bless!!


	19. Chapter 19 Isle Esme

Nessie's POV

When Jake and I finally made our way down the stairs the house was in full swing as everyone rushed around grabbing this and that and taking it to the cars we were taking to the airport. It was hard to believe that I had forgotten about the trip; which Alice said to me before she had bounded out of my room after telling me and Jake to get up.

I smiled; I was still warm from the long night in Jake's arms. I hoped it would stay for a while longer.

"Renesmee it's about time you got up. All your things are in the car; so all you have to do is get yourself ready." Mom said pausing for a moment beside me before carrying a suitcase off down the next flight of stairs. "But you need to hurry; we've got to be at the airport in 30 minutes."

Wow, that wasn't a lot of time; I wonder why we were running so late. But I would have to ask about that later, even if Alice had packed up my things I was in desperate need of a shower before we left.

I glanced up at Jake, who hadn't moved from my side since we walked down here. I didn't want to leave him. Last night he had come to my rescue again, but that didn't mean that things could get strained between us again. And for some reason I was worried that if I took my eyes off him that last night would be washed away and we would be back to where we started.

I wasn't even sure where we were now. We seemed to be on a better ground; but how was I supposed to know that Jake was thinking?

But I did know that I wasn't willing to go back to what we were. Back to the not talking and acting like we didn't know each other. I couldn't do that again. Even if I couldn't have him the way I wanted; I had to have him as a friend.

So not sure what else to do, (I seemed to be not knowing what to do a lot lately…) I took Jake's hand and pulled him behind me as we made our way back up the stairs.

"What's up?" Jake asked when I pulled him over to the couch on the third floor. I pushed him down making him sit and stood in front of him. Jake still wasn't wearing a shirt and it was hard to concentrate on what I was trying to say.

"Jake; I need to talk to you about last night." Jake's eyebrows went up a little. "I need you to understand all the reasons why it happened. Why I had the dream." I paused taking in a calming breath. "We've been in a weird place;" He nodded in agreement. "and well then you started being with that girl from your Biology class, I'm not saying that's a bad thing!" I could feel my heart racing as the words were coming out, I hated lying, but I would have to for Jake's sake. "I'm not saying you shouldn't hang out with or date or whatever you guys are doing. I just, um, don't want to lose you again." I said mumbling out the last part.

Jake's face turned into one of regret and sadness. "Nessie, you never lost me. I-"

But I cut him off, "Yes I did. Even if you don't think so. The way we acted around each other; you might as well have been a person I barely knew." I took in another deep breath. "My point is, I need you as my friend Jake. I don't think I could handle being what we were again."

Jake's face still looked up at me with a pained expression as he got to his feet and stepped close to me. "I promise I'll do everything I can to not be like that again."

I stared up into his eyes for a minute, looking for anything that might tell me if he was unsure of anything he was saying, or a hint of anything but truth. But I found none and nodded my head. Jake smiled and hugged me tightly.

"Are we good now?" He asked, and I could tell by his voice that he was smiling.

I smiled too. "Yeah; we're good."

"RENESMEE CULLEN!" I jumped when Alice's screeching voice bellowed through the house. "IF YOU DON'T GET IN THE SHOWER RIGHT NOW I'M GOING HELP YOU BATHE LIKE WHEN YOU WERE ONE!"

Both Jake and I shared a look, just like the old days, a look that made my heart flutter and hurt all at the same time before we started laughing.

"I'd better go, I'm sure Alice wasn't kidding." I said before walking off to my room to get my things.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I hadn't felt this good in a long time. Sitting on the plain, Nessie in the seat next to me; on our way to Isle Esme, for a week away from people (Miley) and a whole week to spend all my time with Nessie.

I know, I'm the luckiest man alive. And I was enjoying every minute of it. And it hadn't even started yet.

The plane ride to the island was five hours, but since we were on a privet plain and were by ourselves it wasn't so bad. For most of the trip everyone sat with their partners and talked quietly among themselves; except for when we first took off and everyone was talking excitedly about the trip. But that had only last about an hour or so. During which we heard all different kinds of stories from everyone in the family beside me and Nessie. It turned out that everyone besides us had been there multiple times throughout the last 100 years; except for Edward and Bella who had only been once. Whether for just a vacation or a second or fifth honeymoon or just a week end get away. Most of the stories did have to be edited for Nessie and my own ears, but some of them were just funny to listen to.

But after a while everyone started talking in hushed tones as everyone noticed that Nessie was tired and her eyes were starting to droop. Which didn't surprise me; even if she had slept as well as she claimed, I knew she hadn't had a good night's sleep before that in a while. I could still see rings around her eyes. So after talking about finally getting to see this place everyone was talking about, I was able to convince Nessie to lay her head down on my lap and take a nap.

She slept the whole way. It had taken her a while to actually fall asleep, but once she did she was out. As soon as I heard her breathing slow into deep even breaths I sighed; but kept my hand running through her hair. I knew how much she liked it when I combed my fingers through her hair. And I also knew she like it because Bella had been doing it since she was born. She had once told me it was relaxing and it helped her fall asleep faster. That was why I was doing it now.

But even after she was in deep sleep I didn't stop, I kept my fingers in her hair and watched Nessie's face.

To say the least, I didn't mind the five hour flight.

* * *

Once we had landed everyone one started quietly getting up and grabbing their things. As smoothly as I could I lifted Nessie's body into my arms and carried her to the front of the plain where the door was located. I stepped off the last step of the plain and looked around me. It was about 2:30pm and the sun was shining brightly down on the sandy island. The plain was parked on the water, a rope tying it off to a wooden dock that lead right up to the shore. I walked on the dock and followed behind Esme through a narrow sand path filled on both sides with trees and overgrowth. It was a short walk before the house came into view. It was large and white with a porch that went around the entire house.

I walked up the four steps onto the porch and headed through the open door. The house was even bigger on the inside. It seemed much too big for the small island. The first room was a sitting type room with couches and chairs made with soft brown leather. There was also a TV on one wall and a hallway off to the far side of the room and a doorway leading off to a dining room to the left of the front door.

"You can bring her back this way. All the rooms are back here." Bella said, walking ahead of me. I followed her down the hallway and into a decent size bedroom filled with white furniture. Bella pulled back the white covers and stepped back. I set Nessie down on her back onto the queen size bed. I removed my arms as gently as possible, trying my hardest not jostle her. I held my breath as Nessie squirmed a little before yawning and curling up into a ball with her knees tucked under her chin.

"You know don't you?" Bella asked softly.

I looked up and saw she was watching my face. "What do you mean?" I asked just as quietly.

Bella smiled a small smile. "Your face tells your feelings; but do you know what they are saying?"

I felt my eyes get wide. Did she mean what I thing she meant?

"Let me make this easier for you. What are your feelings toward my daughter?" Her face was one of complete seriousness.

A lump formed in my throat and I couldn't speak even though I tried several times; only succeeding in opening and closing my mouth over and over again; most likely looking like a moron.

"What? Did you think no one would notice the way you stare at her. Let alone act around her." Bella asked with raised eyebrows. "You aren't that great at hiding your emotions."

It took me another minute to get anything besides air to finally come out my mouth. "How long have you known?"

Bella seemed to think about it for a second. "Well, I've known since we arrived here. Though I knew it was coming along for a while; well since she was born really, but yeah you get the idea."

I stared in utter shock. I had known my fancied hadn't been perfect, but I thought I had done a pretty good job. Obviously not.

Bella sighed as I stayed silent, still unable to speak. "I just wanted you to know that I know and am not planning on killing you. But I also want to tell you that I think you are being real stupid by dating Miley."

Somehow I managed to get past the lump in my throat. "How did you know her name?" I didn't even think Nessie knew that since she kept calling her 'that girl from your Biology class'.

Bella just shrugged a mischief smile on her face. "I have my ways." She paused before giving me a hard look. "Just please be careful; I think you're playing with fire and sooner or later you are going to get burned. And you might burn Nessie too." With that Bella walked past me and headed out of the room.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I shifted on whatever was so comfortable underneath me before opening my eyes. At first all I saw was white; white walls, white dresser, white chair, and white ceiling.

Confused I turned over in the white bed (shocker there) and was met with something not white, but bronze. Jacob; and he were smiling like it was Christmas morning.

"Hello sleepy head. I was beginning to think that you weren't going to wake up." He said smiling down at me. He was sitting Indian style facing me on the bed wearing only swim trunks. "Hurry up and change, we've got only a little while longer before the sun sets!" He said excitingly as he hopped off the bed and throwing back the white linen that had been wrapped around me.

"What's going on?" I asked getting to my feet beside him before pausing, looking at the wall that had been behind Jake when he was sitting. It was made of glass; letting me see the perfect view of the white sand that lead right into the blue waves. The sun was probably about two hours away from setting right in front of this window, right out over the water.

"Wow." Was the only thing that came to mind. I had heard stories about Isle Esme; but this was better than I had expected.

"Uhuh, yeah I get that. Now go get changed, I've been dying to get in the water." Jake said putting his hands on my shoulders and turning me away from the window and toward a door leading into a rather large bathroom; with tub and separate shower. "Your things are in there, so says Alice."

I laughed as Jake gave me a little push into the room. "Hurry!" He said flashing me a smile before closing the door.

I wasn't sure what had Jake in such a good mood. But I liked it and hoped it stayed. I looked around the bathroom and found a black bikini on a hanger. I stripped off my clothes and pulled on the bikini, on the top half it had a large silver ring connecting the front section, and three rings on each hip holding the bottom together. I looked at myself in the floor length mirror on the back of the door. Wow.

I looked hot.

Wow. Shaking my head I walked out of the bathroom; Jake was waiting for me on the edge of the bed. He looked up when I opened the door and paused; a funny look on his face. One that made me self-conscious.

Swallowing past the lump in my throat I gestured toward the door. "Ready?"

Jake stared for another minute before he smiled again. "Yeah; let's go." He got up and led the way to the glass door. I followed him out the door and over the porch and down into the heated sand.

"It looks perfect." I said in awe as we reached the water. I saw mom and dad a couple yards down the beach walking hand in hand in the opposite direction of us, and Alice and Rosalie were sitting in reclining beach chairs under the sun off to the other side.

"Yeah; but I don't think you can really appreciate it unless under the right circumstances." He said looking off into the distance. I couldn't help but notice how the sun shone onto his chest and reflected on his hair which was pulled back onto a ponytail.

I mentally shook my head. "What circumstances?"

"These!" He yelled turning to me suddenly and grabbing my arm. My feet flew out from under me as Jake slung me up to his shoulder. I screamed out in surprise; as Jake started rushing toward the water.

"JAKE!" I half yelled half laughed as Jake jumped into the air over the water. I barely got in a breath before we landed in the water; Jake didn't let go even after we sunk down under the water. I tried not to laugh as I wrapped my arms around Jake's neck. I pulled my head back a little to look Jake in the face and saw him smiling with laughter.

Man; I could get used to this.

* * *

Jacob's POV

Holy crap! What was Nessie wearing?!

I was sure of it now; fate was trying to kill me. Otherwise Nessie wouldn't be wearing that tiny black bikini.

The second I looked up after she opened the bathroom door; I think I died. I hadn't been sure what to do; I felt frozen in spot. But maybe that was a good thing. I don't want to think what I might have done if I could have moved.

So I had just stared at her making her shift nervously under my gaze. I was thankful when her voice broke through to my head making me finally able to think.

"Ready?"

Swallowing hard I forced myself to act natural; well as natural as I could under the circumstances. "Yeah; let's go" As soon as the words were out I get to my feet and walked out the glass doors thankful that I had a reason to turn away from Nessie. I stopped at the water's edge and waited for Nessie to catch up to me.

I was painfully aware at how close we were standing when she stopped next to me; she looked out over the water and I tried to follow her example. But I found it harder than it should have been.

"It looks perfect." She said in barely a whisper. I couldn't help but glance over at her; did she even realize that everything looked pale and bland in comparison to her? Did she know how beautiful she was?

Shaking my head I quickly looked back out over the water; my mind grasping for something else to think about. "Yeah; but I don't think you can really appreciate it unless under the right circumstances." I said smiling at my idea.

"What circumstances?" She asked sounding confused.

"These!" I yelled turning quickly, hoping to catch her off guard, and grabbed Nessie arm. I pulled her up over my shoulder and took to steps before launching us both into the air, over the water.

"JAKE!" Nessie yelled through a fit of laughter. I smiled as we started down. We splashed into the water, sinking slowly deeper; I could still feel Nessie laughing on my shoulder and I didn't let go. Instead Nessie leaned back in my arm, wrapping her own around my neck and I tried not to laugh too hard; I could stay under water longer than any human could, but it did make it really uncomfortable when I started running out of air. And I wanted to savior every moment like this I could with Nessie.

Slowly we floated back up to the surface and when our heads popped out over the waves the first thing Nessie did was hit me upside the head.

"Ow! What was that for?" I asked, though I couldn't help the smile that was still stuck on my face.

Nessie tried to look mad, but her smile was still there. "I am not a sack of potatoes that you can just sling over your shoulder anytime you want! I have feeling and I should be allowed to do what I want!"

I tried to look apologetic, really I did, but I knew I wasn't succeeding. "I would say I'm sorry, but I don't want to." I said and I couldn't help but laugh at her expression. "Are you really going to try and be mad at me?" I asked giving her middle a tight squeeze.

She looked thoughtful for a moment before she broke into a wide grin that took my breath away. "No, I don't think I will; or could if I even want to." She said giving me a wink.

I smiled. "Good; now then how about we actually enjoy the water a little?" I said and forced myself to loosen my grip on Nessie, slowly moving away from her. "I'll give you a 10 second head start." I said stopping a few feet away from her.

"10 seconds for what?" She asked not moving and looking at me with her head tilted to the side. Jeeze was she trying to kill me; with her looking at me like that, in that adorable way of hers, I couldn't help but think that she was.

"1, 2, 3, 4," I started to count out loud instead of answering.

"Jake what are you doing?" She asked again.

I tried to keep my grin off my face. "5, 6, 7, 8" This was going to be fun.

"Jake! Aren't you even going to tell me what we are doing?" She asked with a laugh.

I just shook my head and kept counting. "9, 10!" As soon as the number left my mouth I rushed forward, my legs kicking as hard and fast as they could. I was fast, as fast, or maybe even faster, than most vampires on land; but in the water....well lets just say that they have a much better advantage. So I had to use the element of surprise if I was going to catch Nessie. There was almost no way I could catch her when she was really moving. But I got lucky. I was about two inches away when Nessie started laughing and swimming away; but I was close enough to grab her ankle. Nessie yelped out as I pulled her back to me and started tickling her sides.

Nessie broke out in uncontrollable laughter. "Jake!" She squealed. "Stop it!"

I couldn't help but laugh along with her. It felt like a life time ago that I had seen Nessie like this. So young, so lively, so happy. Even as I enjoyed this moment with Nessie, I couldn't stop the next thought that came.

I had really hurt her.

In my attempts to hide my feelings I had really messed with Nessie's head; making her think that I was moving on without her. That was stupid of me. I should have realized what I was doing to her. Even if she didn't love me the way I loved her, she still loved me; even if it is like a best friend. I couldn't let it happen again. I could never hurt Nessie again.

"Jake stop it! It hurts!" Though she said it while laughing, the words struck my mind and heart. My hands immediately stilled on her sides and Nessie took in a couple deep breaths before looking up to see my face. "Jake? Jake what's wrong?"

I tried to shake the words out of my head, I knew she didn't mean them, that she was just playing; but with what I just promised myself, I couldn't shake the feeling that I was going to fail. "Sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." I said even though I knew that I hadn't.

Nessie looked at me with an odd expression. "You didn't. Are you ok? You're looking a little pale." She said as her eyes searched every inch of my face.

I shook myself and realized that my hands were still on Nessie waist. Cursing to myself for not noticing sooner I removed my hands and smiled. "I'm fine. Just got lost in thought for a minute." I said.

Nessie watched me for a moment longer before speaking. "Why don't we head back; I want to lie out on the sand before the sun is completely gone." She said and started out for the shore.

I watched her for a minute before slowly following her.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I stretched out on the warm sand, not even bothering with a towel; I liked to feel the individual grains of sand on my skin. I settled down on my back, one hand behind my head the other on my bare stomach.

I still wasn't quite sure how I felt about this much skin showing, it almost made me feel as though I was just walking around in my underwear. But I was sure that Alice hadn't packed anything else for me. I had to remember to never let Alice pack for me again.

Jake joined me a minute later, sitting next to me, his legs not fully extended so he could rest his elbows on them and look out over the water.

I didn't even try to stop myself from staring at him; I knew it wouldn't do any good. Somehow realizing that I was in love with him had made me also know that I couldn't fight the urges to look at him, to stay away from him. So why fight it?

From this angle I could see most of his back, which was broad in the shoulders, every inch covered in muscle, and slimming down near the waist. His arms weren't flexed, but relaxed on his knees, but even so I could see the muscle there as well. Some of his hair had fallen out of its ponytail while we were in the water and now hung around his face; in all he looked perfect.

"Will you tell me about Miley?" I don't know what made me ask it; I wasn't even sure if I wanted to know. But I couldn't help myself. I just had to know who this girl was that had won Jake's heart.

Jake turned towards me with wide eyes. I wasn't sure who was more shocked by my question, me or him.

"Are you serious?" He asked, his mouth hanging slightly open.

I nodded. I wasn't sure what else to say.

He looked a little worried for a moment; probably wondering if he should really tell me or not, wondering how I would take it.

Starting to think that he wasn't going to tell me sat up. "Please; I just want to know what makes her so much different from the other girls in school. Why you picked her." I said in a rush; hoping he wouldn't be able to tell how much it hurt to even think about her.

After another minute Jake nodded his head. "She isn't what she looks like. Really she isn't." He said looking back out over the water, a far off look on his face. "People look at her, see how beautiful she is and judge her before they even talk to her. She doesn't even realize how beautiful she is. She can be shy, but isn't afraid to go after what she wants and can stand up for herself." He stopped for a minute, before he looked back at me. "She is strong willed, speaks her mind; but best of all her heart reaches out to others, always willing to give those around her another chance even when they don't deserve it. She always puts others wants and needs before her own. She really is an amazing person, and she doesn't even know it." He finished; his eyes darker than when he had started talking. We stared at each other for a moment before I thought I might start to cry; knowing he was thinking of someone else.

"She sounds like a really great person." I managed to choke out before turning my head away.

"Yeah." He said, sounding a little worn, as if sharing that much with me had drained him of all his energy.

"Thank you. I'm glad you told me about her." I said softly. It was true. Even if it did hurt to hear Jake talk about another girl that way, it helped me see how much he really cared for the girl. It would help me in the days and weeks, maybe even years to come when I see them together.

I lay back on the sand again, putting both my hands behind my head this time. I looked straight up and was surprised to see that the sky was black, the sun completely gone from the sky. When had that happened? I hadn't even noticed. The only light now was from the full moon hanging high in the sky and the stars that hung far enough away from it that the moon's light didn't outshine them. A warm breeze flowed over my body, making some of my hair tickle across my face.

I couldn't remember the last time I enjoyed nature like this; when I just looked up for the sake of seeing the stars. I could remember a time when I used to spend hours outside just marveling at the world around me. But that was back when times were simpler. Back before I didn't love Jake the way I did now; back when it was just the two of us and nothing else matter.

I couldn't help but long for those days again; when things were simple, when Jake and I wanted the same things, back when we were the only two people in our little world.

I sighed; but I knew things would never be the way they once were; a couple days ago I could have wished they would, but now I couldn't even do that. Not now that I knew that I was in love with Jake. That changed everything.

But even with all the changes that it caused, I was glad that I had fallen in love with him. Now that I looked at it; it was like my whole life had been building up to this point, like this was the reason for everything that happened in my life. Like I lived to reach this one point. Being in love with Jake wasn't just a feeling; it was part of me; part of my very being.

It was hard to think of it like that, but I knew it was true. This wasn't just something that I would cry over and then after time get over and move on. No, this was something that would never leave. It would be like cutting my leg to get this love for Jacob out of me. It was part of me.

"What are you thinking about?" Jake's voice brought me out of my thoughts and I looked at him. He was now in the same position as me, on his back with his hands clasped behind his head.

I shrugged, well as best I could while laying the way I was. "Nothing much. Just watching the moon."

Jake smiled. "Yeah it's pretty awesome tonight." We were quiet for a while longer before my stomach gave a rather loud growl.

Jake and I shared a look before laughing. Getting to his feet Jake brushed off the backside of his trunks. "I guess that's my cue to go find something to make for dinner." He said a grin on his face. He held out a hand for me, which I took; loving the few seconds that I got to feel touch him like this. But I was surprised when he didn't let go. Instead he led the up to the house, pulling me along behind him.

I watched him as we walked, the butterflies inside me going haywire, wondering how I was supposed to hide this love that seemed to almost burst out of me every time we were close. By the time we reached the house and Jake had dropped my hand, leaving it feeling empty and cold, I still didn't know.

_Just take it one day at a time._ I said to myself.

"How does grilled cheese' sandwiches and fried chicken sound?" Jake asked over his shoulder as he leaned into the fridge.

"Sound perfect."

I sat down on one of the stools in the kitchen, I could do this.

* * *

**Hey everyone! Sorry my updates are so spread out. My life is so crazy right now! But I'm trying to find time to write; and I will! I promise! Because the story is only going to get better from here! And I'm getting more excited as I write. So please bare with me! And PLEASE review! Even if you hate the story, I want to know, and I want to know what you want to happen next! Well I'll see you in the next chapter! God Bless!**

**Vinetta-Venture**


	20. Chapter 20 Too Close

Jacob's POV

It had been three days since we had arrived to the Island. It was hard to see that much time had already past; time seemed to fly by here, yet barely pass at the same time. It was an odd feeling but I liked it. The second day here Nessie spent most of it with Edward and Bella, out in the water. And wanting to give them some time together I didn't join them, I knew how much they treasured their time with their only daughter and I had no intention of taking that away from them. Plus I got to use that time to think freely. The day before had been a hectic one; especially near the end.

When Nessie had asked about Miley I about lost it. I hadn't known what to say to that. I had forgotten all about the girl I was supposed to be mad about. I didn't even really know all that much about her; and the little I did I didn't want to share that with her. There is no way that Nessie would be able to believe I liked someone like the real Miley. But I needed her to think that I liked her. So I told her things that I loved in a person. Which happened to be all the things about Nessie. I had been a little worried that she might put two and two together, but like I had told her, Nessie doesn't realize how amazing she is; which worked to my advantage. I wished I could tell her. But I know that isn't possible with things the way they are.

I spent most of the day sitting on the front porch of the house looking out at Edward, Bella, and Renesmee as they did whatever they wanted to do down by the water. It was a beautiful thing to see. Nessie seemed to age backwards, letting go of all cares and just not worrying about anything as she splashed around in the water. That wasn't to say that she worried all the time, but there were certain things that I knew she was concerned about, that caused her not to sleep well. Things that I'm sad to say were sometimes me. I knew that I was causing some confusion about us; I just hoped that dating Miley would smooth things out between us.

Jasper had later in the evening joined me, sitting on the steps beside me. He hadn't said anything for a long time; but when he did I couldn't help but gasp. "Jake have you ever thought about downright telling Renesmee how you feel?"

I shook my head. "No. She doesn't feel the same way as me. There is no reason to tell her, she already knows; it would only make things harder on us for me to just flat out say it." I said hating the truth in my words.

Jasper sighed and got to his feet. "Don't you think she deserves to know, to be given the option? You know, sometimes people will surprise you." He put his hands into his jean pockets and looked down at me. "I'm not going to tell you what to do, but I do think you should at least be honest with Renesmee. You guys have been through too much to start keeping secrets now."

His words had stayed with me for the rest of the day, even as everyone sat around the TV to watch a movie. I don't even know what we watched, I couldn't tell you a thing that had happen during that time; except that Nessie was sitting on the floor, her back leaning the bottom of the chair I was sitting in between my legs. I watched her through the whole movie, Jasper's words filling my mind. I didn't say anything to Nessie about what Jasper had said; but I knew she knew that I had something on my mind. But she didn't ask. I was thankful for that; I wasn't sure what I would have said if she had.

I had lain in bed for hours after Nessie had already gone to sleep, and everyone else had 'gone to bed'. I laid in the same position for hours, not moving at all, Jasper's words still haunting me. I wasn't even sure why they struck me the way they did. It didn't make any sense.

I stayed awake way into the early hours of morning before my brain finally shut down and allowed me to shut my eyes and fall into a restless sleep.

When I woke the next morning the first thing I saw was Nessie. I blinked a few times, but she didn't disappear; nope this wasn't a dream.

"Good morning sleep head!" She said smiling down at me. Her hair was curled more than usual, the front sections pinned to the back of her head, only a few curls hanging loosely around her face. She was wearing a white dress, with no sleeves, just thin straps on the shoulders and a deep V in the front. She wore a brown cord around her neck with a large pink rock dangling from it in the middle of the V and there was a matching bracelet around her left wrist. The dress was probably long, but with her on her knees on the bed it was hard to tell. And I couldn't really care, all I had to do was look up into her face and I stopped breathing. She was beautiful.

It wasn't 'til she gave me a quiet "Thank you." And her face was red that I realized that I must have spoken out loud.

I cursed myself as sat up in the bed. "What time is it?" I asked, more to change the subject then actually wanting to know.

"1:47." She replied, her face slowly losing its blush. I wondered why she had in the first place. I used to tell her that she was beautiful all the time…before everything happened.

It took a second for her words to sink in. "Wait 1:47 in the afternoon?" Nessie nodded, her curls bouncing with the movement. "Really? Wow, I was out." I sighed and ran my hand through my hair.

"Yeah, I guess I should have said 'Good evening'. My bad." She said with a shrug. "So are you going to get up or what?"

I laughed. "Well I was debating that, but I suppose I should get up." I said throwing back the covers and sliding out of the bed. I made my way to the dresser where Alice had put all my clothes. "So why are you all dressed up? Are we doing something?"

I heard Nessie slide off the bed and step onto the floor behind me as I picked a pair of khaki shorts and a black button up shirt. I turned around and froze in place. I stared at the angel in front of me; it's really what Nessie looked like. The dress was long as I had thought, all the way down to the tops of her feet, but now that she was standing I could really see her.

The dress fit her perfectly, hugging her body in all the right places, but not too tightly and then fell loosely from the waist down.

"Not really, I just felt like dressing up today. And this is my favorite dress, plus Alice likes it." She said and it took me a minute to realize she was answering my earlier question.

I nodded numbly. "Well, I'm going to go shower. I'll be back in a bit." I said, not really hearing the words come out. Nothing about me or what I had to say mattered, how could anything else matter when this angel was standing in front of me?

"Okay; I'll have something for you to eat when you get out." She said flashing me a smile before heading out of the room.

I watched her go, my eyes seeing her every move; drinking in every millisecond I could, as if afraid that any minute now she would just disappear. Even after she had left, I was still unable to move at first. It took me a second to remember that I needed a shower. I tried to remember the importance of doing that; if it meant not seeing Nessie for any length of time how could it be necessary? After another moment I did remember why I needed to do this, if I didn't take a shower it was likely that Nessie wouldn't want me around at all because of the smell. I shook my head; it was getting harder to even think around her!

This could get tricky.

* * *

It wasn't 'til I was out of the shower and drying my hair with my towel that I remembered why I hadn't slept well the night before.

"_Don't you think she deserves to know, to be given the option? You know, sometimes people will surprise you. I'm not going to tell you what to do, but I do think you should at least be honest with Renesmee. You guys have been through too much to start keeping secrets now."_

The words repeated themselves in my head over and over again as I dressed. Once I pulled my shorts on I headed out of the bathroom, pulling my shirt on as I walked towards the kitchen. I was only to the living room when I started to smell eggs and sausage. I had just finished rolling up the sleeves to my unbuttoned shirt when I entered the kitchen. Nessie was standing in front of the stove, slaying back and forth to a song I didn't recognize that was playing from her I-pod.

Not wanting to disturb her I stayed in the doorway of the kitchen, leaning against the wall, one leg over the other. Truth be told, I just wanted to watch her. It was interesting how people acted when no one was looking, or in this case when they thought no one was.

But with Nessie, she was the same; she was the same as she was when she is with other people. It was kind of baffling. How could someone be so true to themselves as to not hide who they really are for the sake of what others think?

There were very few people who were who they were because that's who they wanted to be. Most everyone I know now days are who they are because that's what people expected from them. Even I do that at times.

But Nessie is different. She is who she is whether you liked it or not. And if you didn't then that was that. She didn't change herself to please others.

I watched in awe and just plain wonderment as Nessie worked over the stove. As she worked to do something for me.

Dang I loved her.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I had just poured the five scrambled eggs onto a plate when I heard Jake walk into the room.

"Hey, I was starting to think you had drowned or something." I said dumping the sausages onto the plate next. "I hope eggs are alright with you. I wasn't sure what you wanted." I said turning around with the plate in hand.

My eyes widened as Jake stepped forward to take the plate from my hands. He was wearing a pair of khaki shorts and a black shirt with the sleeves folded up his arms, the shirt hung open showing off his chest. "Thank you. It smells great." He said taking the plate to the counter where I had laid out a fork and glass of milk.

Smiling I leaned against the counter in the middle on the kitchen where Jake was sitting on one of the four stools that were around the counter.

Jake had just started shoveling food into his mouth with a speed that was too fast for humans to see, when he stopped, fork half way to his mouth. "Aren't you going to eat anything?" He asked.

I raised an eyebrow. "No, unlike some lazy people I got up before the day wasted away and ate a normal time."

Jake just shrugged. "How do you expect me to look this good without my beauty sleep? It takes work to look as good as I do." He said and finally took the bite that had been hanging in mid air.

_Well whatever he is doing, it's working!_ But I didn't say that. "Sure, sure."

Neither of us said anything else while Jake finished his breakfast; which was about 30 seconds.

"So what are we going to do today?" He asked as he gathered up his plate glass and fork to put in the sink.

I smiled. "Well, I was hoping we could just kind of walk around a little. I've barely seen any of the island."

Jake nodded. "Perfect!" He said and took my hand as he headed towards the glass door leading out the back of the house. We stopped about half way between the house and the water's edge. "So can we just start here and work our way around and then inward?"

I nodded and we started off to the left. As we walked in a comfortable silence my thoughts were brought back to my family. I knew they noticed the way I was dressed this morning; and that they knew that Alice hadn't done it to me. I had never been one to dress up unless I was needed to, but today I had really gone all out.

And the only reason being I wanted to look nice for Jake; even if he wouldn't notice in the way that I wanted him to, he had told me I looked beautiful this morning. Just him telling me that brought a smile to my face and I felt it was worth the extra 37 minutes it took to complete the look.

I don't think Alice had ever been as proud as she was of me this morning; which she told me so when I first came out of my room this morning and she pounced on me, hugging me and squealing in my ear.

"What are you thinking about?" Jake's voice brought me back to the here and now.

I looked around me as I answered, hoping he wouldn't see the little lie. "I'm just amazed at how beautiful it is out here." It was true. It was spectacular. The sun was high in the sky, it's heat warm on my shoulders as we walked; making the sand beneath my feet pleasing to walk on. The water was to our right stretching out as far as I could see, shimmering in the sun light. On our left the trees were getting thicker as we left the house behind us, making it almost impossible to see anything but a lush green that almost seemed out of place on an island.

"They weren't kidding when they said this place was like no other." Jake agreed looking around as well.

We stayed in silence for a long while after that; just enjoying our surroundings. We walked all the way around the island and started into the overgrowth, exploring every inch of the place. I had to be a little careful while we walked through the trees to make sure my dress didn't snag on any lower branches or bushes.

I don't know how long we wandered around, time had seemed to stop the moment Jake and I walked into the trees. Nothing like time mattered at the moment; all I could think about was that I was here with Jacob, in this moment and I was going to enjoy it as best I could.

But when we emerged from the trees again I was proven wrong, time was still passing; the sun was already starting to sink into the sea. As we stepped away from the small forest I was hit with a scaring realization: time is sparse. It will pass you by and you won't even realize it. You've got to make most of the moments you have with the people who are there with you to share them.

"Hey, can we walk back in the water?" Jake asked a second later.

I had to blink a couple times to focus on him. "Um, yeah."

Jake smiled and pulled me by the hand towards the water line. I couldn't help but smile, maybe that had something to do with the fact that Jake was holding my hand again….yeah, I think it probably did.

I was lost in thought again, lost in the feel of Jake's warm hand wrapped around mine that I was surprised when a dollop of wet sand hit me in the face. I looked up and burst out laughing.

"Jake! What the heck are you doing?!" I asked through my laughter. Jake grinned at me but kept on walking, each step he lifted his leg high and then stretched it, taking a huge step, kicking up sand in the process. It reminded me of Jack Sparrow from The Pirates of the Caribbean when Jack and Elizabeth were stuck on the island and Jack was counting his steps so he could find where the rum was hidden.

"What? Do you have a problem with my amazing walking abilities?" Jake asked, still grinning from ear to ear.

"Yes! You're hitting me with the sand!" I giggled.

"A little dirt never hurt anyone!" Jake said. "Here let me show you!" He said and slung his arm around my middle. I screech as both Jake and I fell towards the ground. The next second I was in lying on the sand, the water barely lapping my feet, Jake underneath me; his arm holding me tightly to him.

"JACOB BLACK!" I yelled, though I couldn't help the fit of laughter that took over. "How dare you!" I half heartedly pushed against Jake's chest. Jake laughed out loud.

"I can't believe you did that?!" I laughed.

"Really?" He asked and suddenly I was flipped, lying on my back in the sand with Jake hovering above me, on all fours. My breath caught with the sudden movement, realizing how close we were. "You think you would have been used to things like this before now."

I swallowed. _There is no way I could ever get used to this._ I thought swallowing hard. My whole body felt warmed by Jake's heat hitting me over and over again like the waves that were tickling my feet.

I stared up into Jake's brown eyes; and something in his face changed, though I didn't know what it was. My breathing started to speed up, my heart thumped into my chest as neither of us moved. Everything else faded

My eyes roamed over Jake. Hair had fallen out of his ponytail and now hung around his face, his eyes were darker than normal, his mouth in a small relaxed smile. His shirt was hanging open, leaving his chest bare above me. When I looked back up at Jake's eyes there was something there that hadn't been there a moment before; I wasn't sure what it was.

But something in the way he looked at me forced my body into motion; my hand made its way to Jake's arm that was beside my head.

Jake's eyes never left mine and a moment later I was leaning up, moving closer to Jake's face, closer to his mouth. My mind tried to tell my body to stop, that this was going to end badly; but it was already too late. I was too close; his hair tickled my face as I got closer. I took in a deep breath-

!!!SWOOSH!!!

Suddenly water flooded around us, as a wave crashed down on top us.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I don't know what made me do it. But suddenly I was snaking my arm around Nessie's waist, holding her to my chest and falling onto the wet sand we were walking on; twisting us in mid fall so I would hit first so I didn't hurt Nessie by falling on top of her. I heard her yelp out a moment before I landed back first into the warm sand and smiled.

"JACOB BLACK" Nessie half yelled half laughed at me. "How dare you!"

I couldn't stop smiling, even as she yelled at me, and I laughed; trying my best not to notice how good Nessie's body felt pressed against my own.

"I can't believe you did that?!" She said through a musical laugh.

"Really?" Again, I don't know what made me do it. I don't really think I was thinking; I just let my body take over and do whatever it wanted….which probably wasn't a good idea. Because the next I knew, I was flipping both Nessie and I over so that suddenly she was lying on the sand and I was hovering above her, much closer than I should have been. But I couldn't seem to make myself move away. "You think you would have been used to things like this before now." I said a little breathless.

Nessie didn't answer and somewhere, something inside of me was telling me I needed to move before I really did something stupid. But just as the decision became clear to the rest of my body, I caught Nessie's eye, making my heart skip a beat before it started to thump loudly against my chest. And then I was lost; lost in the bright brown gold eyes that I never wanted to find my way out of.

My gaze swept over Nessie's entire face; taking everything in, recognizing everything I saw from hours of doing exactly what I was doing now. Her face was as pale as it had always been, though not as white as her mother's. Her hair was fanned out on the ground around her head, the setting sun playing different hues of brown with each strand. _How is it possible for anything to be so beautiful?_ Yet, Nessie could never be anything but.

I felt a warm hand touch my left arm, sending tingles of sparks up past my shoulder and into my chest and Nessie started leaning upwards; never breaking eye contact. My breathing stopped as she got closer, everything seemed to go into slow motion, as she leaned up. Somewhere inside my head I tried to tell myself to back up, that she was only trying to get back to her feet; that I was probably making her uncomfortable by staring at her the way that I was. But I could barely hear it over the deafening sound of my heart as she got closer; if she didn't watch it I knew I wouldn't be able to help myself. Her eyes were bright, more golden now that brown; as she got even closer.

_Pull back! You are going to regret this!_ My mind yelled at me; but it was too late. I started moving towards Nessie, just a little closer-

!!!!SWOOSH!!!!

I didn't even notice the wave 'til suddenly a heavy force of wet beat down on my back. It was gone almost as soon as it came; leaving Nessie and I in the exact same potions that it had found us in; only now, we were soaked.

I looked down at a shocked and confused Nessie for a moment, savoring the last moments of closeness before rolling away.

At first neither of us said anything, and I was worried about what she might be thinking. I couldn't even make myself look up at her I was so ashamed. Had she noticed me leaning in, with all intentions of stealing a kiss? I mentally kicked myself for losing control like that. It was unacceptable. How could I have let my guard down like that? What would have happened if that wave hadn't interrupted my movements? What would Nessie say if I had stolen her first kiss from her?

What was she thinking now?

"Well, I'm wet. How about you?" Nessie asked looking out over the water.

I was slightly taken aback and it took me a little longer to answer. "Um, soaked." Was the best I could do. I glanced up towards Nessie, wondering if I could tell by her expression what she was thinking. But my brain locked up and all the breath that was in me was knocked out like I had been kicked in the stomach. I snapped my eyes shut, but the picture of what I had just seen was glued to the back of my eyelids. Nessie sitting on the beach; her once perfectly curled hair now hanging limply around her face, completely soaked; in a white dress.

I tried to shake the picture of the now almost completely see through dress Nessie was wearing, but I wasn't having much luck. Disgusted with myself I got to my feet; eyes still closed, and took off my shirt. I pushed the wet clothing toward the direction I had last seen Nessie in; and after a few moments I heard a gasp and then felt the shirt ripped from my hand. My guess was Nessie hadn't realized what all the water had done to her appearance.

A moment later Nessie cleared her throat and I took this as my cue that it was okay to open my eyes again. When I did I sighed in relief to see that she was wearing my shirt and had buttoned enough of the buttons to keep the front together. It looked strangely alluring on her; though I think it might have had something to do with the fact that she was wearing something of mine.

"Thanks." She mumbled looking down as the space in front of her feet, her face very red.

I shrugged trying to keep the image of her in that wet dress at bay. "Any time. So I think we should probably head back now." I said as casually as I could.

Nessie nodded and we started up the beach once again, though a little farther away from the water this time.

It was a couple of minutes before Nessie broke the silence. "Sorry about earlier; I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable." She said quietly.

Again I shrugged; I seemed to be doing that quite a bit lately. "No it's ok. Don't worry about it. I should have heard that wave coming."

Nessie just nodded; and neither of us spoke again as we made our way back to the house.

* * *

Renesmee's POV

Once we reached the house I went directly to my room, leaving Jake in the living room, to change. As I pulled off his shirt I caught a glance at myself in the mirror and blushed. The white cotton was almost completely see through! No wonder Jake wouldn't look at me. And to think that I just sat there!

I could still feel the heat on my face as I stripped out of the wet dress and changed into a pair of pink Softy shorts and a black tank top. After I dressed I still wasn't sure if I was ready to face Jake yet, I could still feel the warmth on my cheeks and I didn't want him to see this in case he guess what I might be thinking. So I took a seat on the edge of my fluffy bed, facing the windowed wall.

What a day. I had gotten all dressed up, went exploring with Jake, and almost KISSED Jake! Then to top it off got stopped from kissing him by a wave! Have I completely lost my mind! What had I been thinking?! What would have happened if that wave hadn't come?

Tears stung at my eyes when the obvious answer came to me. He would have pulled back, then would have probably calmly explained that he didn't feel the same way as me.

And for the first time ever I got mad that there was such a thing as imprinting. I knew it was stupid, that it made no since for me to get mad at something like that, but I couldn't help but think that maybe if Jake hadn't imprinted on me then I would have a shot with him. That maybe he would feel differently about me and wouldn't be forced to be my friend, that we might have the option to be more. But I knew that was a crazy thought. If Jake hadn't imprinted on me he wouldn't have come with me, left his family to be where ever I am; wouldn't have stayed with me as I grew up while everyone else in the family went to school and worked. I might not even be in love with him.

Pushing myself farther onto the bed I laid down on my side and curled myself into a ball; tucking my knees under my chin and wrapping my arms around my legs. Taking in a shaky breath I tried to keep the tears from coming. Why couldn't Jake and I be like Sam and Emily? Or Jared and Kim?

Why weren't we? The question hit me like a ton of bricks; what was different between me and Jake, and all the other imprints? All the other imprints were couples, well besides Quil and Claire, but Claire was only like 13. So what is wrong with Jake and I? Why weren't we a couple? Why didn't Jake feel the same way about me as I did about him?

It doesn't make sense! I felt like screaming out at the world! What was wrong? Why were Jake and I only supposed to be friends while everyone else was more?

I felt the tears sliding down my face and angrily wiped them from my face. I needed answers. Getting up from the bad I walked quickly to the door and poked my head out; nope no one in the hallway. I walked to the door next to mine and knocked. After a few moments the door opened and Jake's face came into view. He had also changed from his wet things and was now wearing a white t-shirt and a pair of cut offs.

"Hey, what's up?" He asked opening the door to let me walk in.

When I entered the room Jake closed the door and I turned on him, hands on my hips. "Jake, I need you to tell me something." His face went to confused to an almost scared look. "Is there two different kinds of imprints?"

Jake blinked a couple times before answering. "Uh, no." More blinking. "Why?"

I sighed. "Well I was just thinking, about Sam and Emily and Jared and Kim. I was just wondering if there was something wrong with us?"

Jake looked shocked and finally moved over to the bed in the middle of the room where he sat. "Nessie, um, why don't you take a seat." He said looking down at his feet.

Not sure what I had just gotten myself into I sat next to Jake.

"Nessie, there isn't different kinds of imprints." I opened my mouth to ask how on earth it was possible for us to be different from the other imprints then but Jake continued. "When one of us imprints, something changes in us. Everything we knew to once matter most to us, suddenly doesn't anymore. Everything that we had as our top priority gets bumped down a few notches. When we imprint nothing else matters except that person we imprint on. It's like everything we see and think about is made up of dulled colors, and blurry lines; except for our imprint. It's like our imprint is the brightest light, full of bright colors and completely in focus. Everything we once knew to be important is suddenly marred by you." Jake took in a deep breath, looking up into my eyes. "It's like if the rest of the world were to fade away into nothing, but you were still here, I would be ok. But if you were to die, and I was left in a world without you…I couldn't keep going. I would simply stop existing." He paused; his words sinking. I could feel the tears starting to build behind my eyes but didn't let them fall. I tried not to think to hard about Jake not living anymore; the thought hurt too much. And I still needed my questions answered.

I stayed silent while Jake collected himself. "When you were younger, I didn't think I could explain what all imprinting meant. I didn't think you would be able to understand. So I told you that I would always be your friend no matter what." Jake took in a deep breath. "Which is true, to an extent, as your imprint, all I want is to make you happy. It makes me happy to see you happy. I will always be whatever you need me to be. While you were younger, I was like an older brother, as you grew up I became your best friend. That is the same thing that happened with Sam and Emily; he imprinted on her and she fell in love with him. So they got married. An imprinter will always be whatever the imprinted needs." Jake finished letting his head fall down and sighing; as if telling me this lifted a weight off his chest.

We were both silent then. I didn't know what to say. I felt a warmth inside my stomach, hearing Jake talk like that about me made me feel as though I was special. And I guess to him, I was. I felt like smiling and crying at the same time.

"I guess that means we're broken." I finally said. "I mean because we are defiantly not what I want to be; and it's kind of obvious that we both want different things."

Jake nodded his head, looking guilty and sad at the same time. "I know; and I'm so sorry. It's entirely my fault. I don't know why I want something that you don't. It shouldn't be possible." He said looking back up at me. "I promise to do everything to change. I don't mean to make things so hard on us."

I sucked in a deep breath; hoping the tears would hold. It was getting harder; but I needed to make things right. I needed to tell Jake one more thing before I completely lost it. So taking his hand in mine I said. "No, Jake. I don't want you to force yourself to do anything, or to feel anything. I want you to feel as you do; and we'll make it work. As long as we're friends we'll make it out ok. Right?" I said, knowing I only had a few seconds before my eyes popped out of my head from the tear build up.

He nodded before pulled me into a warm hug. I laid my head on his shoulder and hugged him tightly around the waist. I only pulled back because I knew I was about to lose it.

"Well, um ok, I'm going to go find mom and dad and see what they're up to." I said, hoping my smile looked genuine as I hopped off the bed.

I was almost to the door when Jake said something. "Renesmee," I turned around, my hand still on the doorknob. "are we ok?" He asked looking anxious.

Pulling the last bit of will power I had left I smiled and nodded. "Yeah, Jake." I said before walking out of the room, shutting the door behind me.

As soon as the door was shut I moved as quickly and quietly as I could I made my way through the house and out the front door. The second my feet hit the path that was surround my trees I took off at a run. The tears ran down my face almost as fast as I was running. I didn't bother to wipe them away, I knew that others would fall down to replace the ones that I removed, so why bother. What did it matter anyway?

Jake still didn't love me. And worse of all he wanted to just to make me happy yet couldn't. He was trying, but it didn't work!

I kept running 'til I didn't recognize where I was; and fell to the cool green ground. I curled myself into a ball and let myself cry, cry hard. Harder than I ever had before. My insides felt like they were collapsing in on themselves. My heart felt like someone had their large hands around it and they were squeezing it tighter and tighter, making it almost impossible to breathe. My chest felt like it was burning from the inside out! I curled myself into a ball and cried out! I couldn't think straight, I couldn't barely make anything out of the burning going through my body.

Why was this happening to me!?! Why didn't Jake love me?! Why were we different from the others?! Why did I have to love someone I could never have!?!?!

The hand around my heart tightened, making my heart burn even more! I cried out again, as if it would lessen the pain. But it didn't.

I don't know how long I was there, between the pain and the fact the sky was covered by green so I couldn't tell what time it was. Either way all I wanted was for unconsciousness over take me; because at least then the pain would be duller.

* * *

**Hello everyone! Sorry I know it's been a while since I've written. I have been out of town and haven't had the chance to update 'til now. Though the time away made me redo quite a bit of this chapter, so I guess it's a good thing I didn't updated it. Anywho I hope you enjoy this chapter! I also want to say a belated 'Happy Birthday!!!' to LissyGirl! Who was the one who inspired me to finished the chapter today, instead of putting it off for another time. So please enjoy this chapter LissyGirl! God Bless everyone! DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW!!!**

**Vinetta-Venture!**


	21. Chapter 21 Finding a New Hope

**Jacob's POV**

I sat numbly on my bed, I couldn't move, physically or mentally. I hadn't moved since Nessie had left my room over an hour ago.

_Where had that come from?_

I replayed over and over again the conversation that I had with Nessie. However, one part kept coming back to me; like a knife to my heart.

_"I guess that means we're broken." She finally said. "I mean because we are defiantly not what I want to be; and it's kind of obvious that we both want different things."_

I didn't know how these words could hurt me so much; I had already known Nessie didn't love me. I had already been told that we didn't have the same wants; I had already been hurt. My heart was already broken. How was it that this could hurt again?

I had thought my heart was already torn into too many small pieces to possibly break anymore. But as I sat here, Nessie's words repeating themselves in my head, my heart was tearing again! Every time I heard Nessie telling me that she didn't feel the same way as I did, my heart tore once more.

_"I mean because we are defiantly not what I want to be; and it's kind of obvious that we both want different things."_

But I think even worse than her not loving me back; I hurt her every second that I loved her. She wanted to be friends; I got a warm feeling in the pit of my stomach thinking that: She needs my friendship. She had told me as much on many occasions. But she knew how I felt, knew that whenever we were together my thoughts were occupied with pictures of us 'together'.

Thinking I might throw up out of disgust of myself I got to my feet and ran out the door of my room, heading towards the tree line, pulling my shirt off as I picked up speed. As soon as I was out of sight of the house, I pulled my shorts off along with my boxers, tied them to the cord around my ankle, and let the burning sensation come over me as I phased. I felt the burn go down my spine as my body grew and changed. I relished the feeling as my arm extended, and my legs grew longer and thinker. I felt the hair growing over my face moving downward 'til every inch of me was covered with hair. It was a great feeling; as if I was releasing all the emotions I had pent up, as my wolf self came out. In less than a second, I was running on all fours, as fast as I dared through the trees.

The moment I changed into my wolf form, three voices popped into my head, voices that didn't belong to me; but were so familiar I knew who there were immediately.

_And then she said 'Who the heck ar- Wait! Jake, is that you man?! _Embry's thought suddenly upon my entering into our shared world of thought.

_Holy crap! Dude where have you been? We haven't heard from you in forever! _Quil, who was running away from Claire's house, where he had apparently spent the whole day, making his way for his rounds, thought excitingly.

_Come on it hasn't been that long._ I said, trying not to think about anything about the last couple of weeks. But the funny thing about trying not to think about something, you usually think more about that thing you were trying not to think about the more you try to block it out.

Seth was the first to say anything about it. _Whoa; man, what happened to you? _And just like that the secret was out of the bag. Images unwillingly came into my head, pictures of different times when Nessie was telling me that she didn't feel the same way. I knew they saw these too and by their thoughts they were sadden by my situation.

_Man, I'm really sorry. This totally sucks._ Quil thoughts were genuine.

_Yeah, I don't envy you._ Seth thought.

After that everyone kind of fell into a kind of silence, no one really knowing what to say.

_Does anyone else see the problem here? _Embry asked after a minute. Everyone shrugged. I'm not sure how I knew this; maybe they thought about shrugging…I don't really know. _Really? No one even questions any of this? Come on we all know that it's IMPOSSIBLE for Jake to want something that Nessie doesn't. It's all part of being an imprint!_

I shook my head sadly, stopping at a rather clear spot in the woods. _No, she doesn't love me. Well not like that._ I sat down on my back legs, working hard to not cry; now was not the time for that.

_Jake, I think Embry is right. _Seth thought, coming to a slow jog. He was also making his rounds around Lapush.

_Jake; what if this was all some big misunderstanding? I mean, she never actually said she didn't love you, like that I mean._ Quil pointed out.

_Yeah, or maybe she is just afraid of her feelings or something. You guys have been friends for a long time. She may need time to adjust to these new feelings. _Seth offered. _Claire is kind of starting to go through that now. Maybe it's the same thing?_

I wanted desperately to believe them. I could even feel the faint flicker of hope starting to spark up in my chest. But I wasn't sure if I wanted myself to start think that maybe I was mistaken; because what if I am right? What if she doesn't love me? I didn't know if I could handle being crushed again.

_Jake, what if you just told her how you feel? It would certainly put all uncertainty out of your head; because, we all know it's there._ Embry said, somehow conveying that he had a smirk on his face.

I could almost feel myself giving in to what they were saying. But then the conversation from earlier went through my head again; and I shook my head.

_How could she not know!_ I thought, stomping my front paw into the ground; leaving a large hole in the grass. _No, she knows; and she doesn't feel the same._ I thought to them. Even as I told them, my heart pounded in anguish. _Look I've got to go._

_Come on Jake don't go! You just got here! _Seth called.

_Yeah look,-_

But I didn't hear the rest of whatever Quil was going to say, because I had already phased back. I pulled on my boxers and pants and sat back down. I wiped my wet cheek, where a single tear had fallen down my face, with my shirt before pulling it back on. I sat on the ground, arms propped on knees as I stared off into nothing.

Something in me begged me to listen to the things my friends had said; but I couldn't. As much as I would love to be wrong, I didn't see how I could be. How could this be a misunderstanding? She told me quite plainly that we didn't share the same feelings.

No; she doesn't love me.

With that sad affirmation I sluggishly got to my feet. I walked slowly, not really knowing where I would turn out; didn't really care. My thoughts revolved around Nessie. Around things that would never be. I knew I shouldn't think about them, that I should be happy just having Nessie with me at all. She was so amazing I sometimes wondered why she even bothered with me. I guess it had something to do with the imprinting.

A sad smile came to my face at that. Nessie _did_ love me. I just needed to remember that.

A question suddenly came into my head; one that I was really rather surprised that I hadn't asked before. Did imprinting effect Nessie at all?

Did she feel some kind of pull to me; even if it is just like a friend? Did she ever think about me when I wasn't with her? Did she ever wonder what I was doing? Then again, maybe that was only me, maybe that was just something you did when you were in love. But no; my thoughts have always revolved around her. Even when she was a child. I didn't have feelings for her when she was that young. So maybe-

I let a sigh slip through my lips as I looked around me. I was standing on the edge of the tree line and looking out over the darkening water, the sun having set about ten minutes earlier. The sky still held the faintest glows of what must have been a beautiful sunset; dull reds and oranges, even a pale yellow around the outer edges.

I couldn't stop myself from wondering if Nessie had seen the sunset. She would have liked it.

Sighing again I shook my head as I walked out over the cooling sand. I plopped down on a firm pile of sand and looked out over the water. I really needed to stop being so moody. I already knew Nessie didn't love me, like that. Why did it keep slapping me in the face? Why couldn't I just accept it? It was like even though I knew it in my head, my chest wouldn't recognize this knowledge.

Why wasn't being her friend enough?

* * *

Renesmee's POV

I have no idea how long I was lying on the ground; I couldn't think clearly enough to have a good guess either. I just stayed where I was, curled into a ball, letting my body shake as I dry sobbed. I had stopped actually crying a while ago, all wetness gone from my eyes; leaving them dry and achy.

My thoughts had all but stopped; only one clear thing was going through my head.

He didn't, and would never love me.

The thought tore away at my mind, making my head feel as though it had a whirl wind going through it. The thought clawed at my heart, leaving it torn and feeling as though it wouldn't be able to beat much longer.

This was worse than any other time I told myself he didn't like me. Because now it was different. Now it wasn't just some crush that I would one day get over and move on. Now I was in love with him. And I would never stop loving him; I knew that now. And with that knowledge came the realization that I would never stop feeling this way. That every day I would wake up, open my eyes, and not see Jake first thing. That from now on, there will always be a kind of separation between us.

And there was nothing I could do about it.

This realization hit me hard, in the stomach knocking all the air out of my lungs and in the heart.

After some time I thought I heard something, though I couldn't be sure; my head was throbbing. But then I heard it again. It sounded like my name.

"Renesmee?" I heard, as though from across a very long and empty hallway. I tried to move; to turn to the one talking to me; but I couldn't seem to make myself move at all. My arms just tightened around my legs as the person knelt down in front of me; putting a cool hand on my shoulder.

"Renesmee?! Can you hear me?" Dad asked in a worried tone.

It took a moment for his words to make their way into my head, and for them to actually have any meaning. I nodded my head slowly.

"Renesmee, what happened?" He asked slipping his arms around my body and lifting me a little so that I was sitting in his lap. "Come on Angel, talk to me." He said softly.

Suddenly my eyes were wet again, shedding tears that I didn't think I had left to shed. My heart hurt so bad, and all I wanted to do was pour out my heart to the one who always protected me. "Daddy." I cried, throwing my arms around his neck, burying my face in his shirt.

Dad's arms tightened around my back and he rocked us both. "Shhh, it's ok. Everything's going to be ok." He would whisper every few minutes as I cried into his chest. I felt like I was small again; crying to dad when we had to move yet again to another place. Or when I wasn't allowed to go outside because someone might see me. I felt protected in his arms.

Though; even though I felt horrible to admit it. I wished they were a different, warmer, larger, set of arms.

After a few minutes I finally got my tears under control again, I unwound my arms from his neck and took dad's hand. I took in a deep shaky breath and let all the memories of the past three weeks come tumbling out of my head and into his. I remembered everything with perfect clarity, everything that was said, every hurtful action, every feeling. I replayed them for my father and I heard him gasp at the more painful parts. Though he became rather quiet when my memories started toward the end, over the past couple of days.

By the time I had finished I was emotionally drained and felt as though I was about to pass out. But I couldn't do that. I needed to know what dad was thinking. I had to know if he was disgusted with me. That had been the reason I hadn't told him in the first place.

I waited for him to say something, but dad remained silent. I was about to think he was too mad to even speak when finally he let out a deep breath.

"Renesmee, I'm so sorry." He said quietly. I leaned back and looked up at my dad in surprise. I had been so sure that he would have been mad; appalled even. But as I looked up into his face I didn't see any of those things. I just saw hurt and regret. "I should have known." He whispered so low that I almost didn't hear it. "I am so sorry." He paused for a moment, looking as though he was thinking very intently about something. After a minute he got a very determined look about him and he got to his feet, bringing me up his arms. "Come on, I need to make things right." He said softly before he broke off into a vampire speed run.

In less than a minute we reached the end of the trees, where mom was waiting; looking very worried. As soon as we came into view she hurried forward to where dad was putting me on my feet.

"Renesmee, are you alright?" She asked wrapping her arms around me in a gentle hug.

I shrugged; but didn't say anymore. I didn't feel like lying anymore; but I wasn't really sure if I was ready to talk about it. Though I knew I would have to at some point, I had just 'showed' dad everything; I wasn't sure if I could go through all those emotions again so soon.

"I'll be back in a little bit, if you'll take Renesmee back to the house." Dad said to mom; who nodded. "Angel, I love you; and I promise everything is going to be ok." He said before kissing my forehead and running back into the woods.

* * *

Jacob's POV

I was still sitting on the sand, debating whether I should head back to the house yet or not when I heard my name.

"Jacob;" I turned to see Edward running out of the trees, slowing to a walk as he got past the woods. "we need to talk.

I looked over my shoulder at him; I'm not going to say that I wasn't confused or curious. It wasn't like Edward and I didn't talk or anything; we were actually friends, but the look on his face told me that it was going to be a serious conversation. What did he have to say to me? I wasn't the one he usually went to talk about the important things. Unless it had to do with Nessie.

Oh please no! I jumped to my feet. Was she ok?! My thoughts went downhill from there; Nessie was the one thing that Edward would possibly want to talk with me about!

"Yes, it's about Renesmee; but no, she isn't hurt. Well, physically anyway." He said, never breaking eye contact.

Was this about our conversation earlier? Was she upset that I didn't just want to be her friend? I knew Edward was listening to my thoughts, I just couldn't seem to get them under control. _What's going on?_ I asked him in my head. He looked paler than normal, which is rather hard since how pale he is to start off with.

He shook his head. "Jacob; I can hear everyone's thoughts, but only within a two mile span. Whatever is on their mind, I know. Except for Bella and Renesmee." Edward's face screwed up into a pained expression. "But today I heard Renesmee, from five and half miles off." Now I was confused. Edward couldn't hear Nessie unless she wanted him to and she was touching him.

Edward nodded. "Yes, but not today. I heard her Jake. I can't hear her if I'm right next to her; let alone five miles away. But I did. Do you know what I heard?" He asked, looking like if he could have cried, he would have. I shook my head. "Jacob, she was screaming. I've never heard anything like it. It was the most agonizing sound I have ever heard." I felt as though all the breath had been kicked out of me. I wanted to ask where she was now; but I couldn't get my mouth to form the words. Edward kept going. "She was screaming out, in her mind her heart was tearing to shreds. Jacob; you hurt her."

At his words I felt my knees buckle under me and I fell to my knees. What was wrong with me?! How could I cause this kind of pain to her?!

"Jake I need tell you something. And I need to apologize." Edward looking very tired gingerly sat down in front of me. "I knew how you felt. I have known for a long time that are in love with her." I wanted to say something; but I didn't' know what. "No let me finish. And, I've known for a long time that she has been falling in love with you in return."

I felt my eyes widen. What was he talking about? He can not mean that.

"Jake she is in love with you; and I've known. Jake I'm sorry I haven't told you sooner. All of us knew what was going on. We know the reason you are dating Miley." I felt like my head was spinning; everything that I knew was suddenly changing. "They all wanted to tell you that she felt the same way. But I told them it wasn't our place; that you two would figure out on your own." He looked down and sighed. "But all I really wanted was to keep Renesmee to myself as long as I could. To keep her as my little girl." He paused, looking down at the sand in front of him.

I rubbed my head with my hand. I was starting to feel light headed with this new information. And I was starting to feel this funny warm feeling in the pit of my stomach; a feeling that I had all but forgotten. Hope.

"But tonight, I see that I was being selfish and rather stupid. I guess if I was being honest with myself I would have known that she was _never_ really just mine. You've been there all along." He paused to take in a deep breath. "She showed me everything that's happened between you two. I was hurting her by not saying anything." He said in a soft hurt voice. After a moment he looked back up to me. "Jacob, just go tell her that you love her. Tell her everything."

I sat numbly where I was; still thinking to myself that I must have heard him wrong. How could Nessie love me?

"Jake; please just trust me. Just go tell her that you love her." He said staring me in the eyes. And I couldn't stop the hopeful feeling that came over me. "Go; she's at the house." He said with a soft knowing smile.

I gave him a nervous smile back before getting to my feet. "Thank you Edward." I said before running as fast as I could back in the direction of the house.

* * *

**Hiya! So I know this chapter is rather short, sorry about that. But I really wanted to put it up! I hope you all like it! PLEASE REVIEW! Oh and the name of the next chapter is 'Finding the Truth..FINALLY'! Just to let you guys know! Well God Bless!**

**Vinetta-Venture**


	22. Chapter 22 Finding the TruthFINALLY!

Renesmee's POV

I lay on my bed, watching the last of the light fade into the ocean as I waited for mom to return with a cup of warm milk.

I stared; I couldn't even remember the last time I blinked, blankly out the window feeling very numb. I knew I was lying on my bed, I could see my reflection in the window, but I couldn't even feel the comforter beneath me.

"Here you go Ness." Mom said, suddenly on the bed next to me, holding a white mug with steaming milk.

Turning I took the cup and sat up to take a sip. The milk felt warm on my tongue and down my throat. "Thanks mom." I said my voice barely a whisper, sounding hallow and empty of all emotion even to my own ears.

I sipped once more before setting the mug on the little nightstand next to the bed. I slouched back onto the backboard of the bed and wrapped my arms around my legs again. I felt mom's arm slip around my shoulders and I leaned into her touch. She hadn't said much since dad left to go do whatever it was that he needed to; she had just been by my side. She felt like a strong force; I felt like she was the only thing keeping me sitting up at the moment. Like if she wasn't here, with her gentle arm around me I would just slump down and fall into nothingness.

"Honey;" She said after a while, sounding very hesitant. "I don't want to make you talk about it. I just want to let you know I'm here if you need me." She leaned her head on top of mine.

I was about to say I wasn't sure if I could talk about it; when I heard my name, making me sit up abruptly.

"Renesmee!" I heard Jake's voice; the sound warming the pit of my stomach and stabbing at my heart at the same time.

A moment later Jake was standing in the doorway, looking very pale and shocked. I barely noticed as my mother slipped out of the room, using the glass door leading to the beach. My focus was complete on Jacob, his hair was a mess, as if he had been running, his chest was moving heavily as he breathed in and out rapidly.

"Nessie; I need to tell you something." He said, looking very nervous, but not moving any closer to me or any farther away.

When he didn't say anything I realized he was waiting for some kind of response. I forced myself to nod, wondering why he was acting so strange. Had I really screwed things up that badly this time? I blinked, hoping I wouldn't cry in front of him; that would only likely make things worse. Jake already felt bad for not loving me back. How would he feel if he saw me crying over him? I didn't want to make him feel bad. This wasn't his fault.

Jake swallowed loudly; though his eyes never left mine. "Renesmee, I don't know how to say this. Really, it shouldn't be that hard; I don't know why I'm having such a hard time. No, no that's not true." He paused, took a deep breath; his eye suddenly getting such an intense look I didn't think I would ever be able to look away. "Nessie, you are so important to me. You just can't understand what all you mean to me. Ness, you are more than just my imprint. I don't think there are words to tell you all that you mean to me. And maybe that's why this is so hard to say." He paused again. Looking at a loss for words.

My heart wrenched at a sudden, horrid thought. Is he leaving?

He was leaving!

I felt the thought stab into my gut; twisting as it hit me. He was leaving; I had finally driven him away! Was it because of our different feelings? Was I making him too uncomfortable?

Thinking fast I quickly got to my feet; rushing up to stand in front of Jake. "Wait! You can't go!" I choked out. "Jake you can't leave me! I promise never to talk about it never again! Please Jacob!" I could already feel the tears leaking down my face. I thought things were going to be bad with things the way they were between us; but this was worse. I couldn't do it!"Jake I need you! You promised me! You said we would always be friends! Jake, I swear that I will never ask for more than that from you ever again!" I swallowed past the lump in my throat. I knew that was kind of a low blow; but if it kept him here I couldn't help but try it. "Jake, I can't do this without you! I couldn't survive without you. Please don't leave me." I finished in a horse whisper.

My hand desperately wanted to reach out and take Jake's hand; but I didn't dare. Jake was looking down at me with an unreadable face; his eyes darker than I had ever seen them before.

"Nessie, I'm not leaving you." He said slowly, looking me right in the eyes as he did; as if to make sure knew he was being serious. I felt like a weight had been lifted off my chest at his words. "I'm in love with you." He said, not breaking eye contact.

I started to nod, but did a double take. "What?" I asked, my voice coming out no louder than a whisper. What had he said?

Jake nodded. "Nessie, I love you." He said, my eyes going wide at his words.

Surely I was hearing him wrong. "No." I said, more tears starting to form. "No! You don't! You told me we just wanted to be my friend! You said we had different feeling for each other!" I said loudly.

He winced and nodded. "And you said that we had different wants. You told me you wanted things to go back to the way they were." He said looking down at me with a look of wonder.

I was starting to feel light headed; this wasn't happening! Did I fall asleep waiting for mom to bring my milk to me?

"Oh no! I am dreaming aren't I?" I asked to Jake. I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach. I hadn't even realized that I was starting to hope that this was real. How could I have done this to myself? How could I let my mind bring this up? My mind had to know how much this was going to hurt!

Jake's eyes got a little wider. "No! Nessie this is real."

Suddenly my hand that had tingled for Jake's to be around it was wrapped by his warm hand. I felt sparks shoot up through my arm. His other hand came up to my face, his palm against my cheek; his fingers in my hair.

"Renesmee," He said my name slowly, staring right into my soul. "I'm not leaving you. And I swear nothing I have ever said to you before is more truth than this: I love you."

Jacob's POV

I have never run faster in my life; nor felt like I was moving more slowly than a snail. My mind was moving just as fast as my feet were.

Was it possible? Could there really be a chance? Could it really be possible that this was all just some BIG misunderstanding? Could both Nessie and I both have been so blind?

Question after question went through my head, none of them having an answer. But I couldn't get my mind to slow down. It was filled with hope and a sinking feeling that I was going to be let down once again. But I had to know. Edward had put a seed of doubt in this thing that I knew for sure. I had to know.

I ran faster than I have ever run before, my mind pushing my body with such intensity that if I were human I probably would have been torn apart by the sheer speed.

I was running so fast that I barely had enough time to stop before crashing through the glass door of the house. I skidded to a stop in front of the door and pushed it open, walking quickly into the living room. The sound of a fluttering heart made me stop in the middle of the room. _Wait._ I thought. _I need to collect myself here. What am I going to say when I get in there? What do I do?_ I mulled over these things; not coming up with anything. All I could think about was getting into her room and seeing her. Shaking my head I decided I would just wing it; I started toward the hallway.

"Jacob?" I heard someone whisper softly. I turned around and saw Bella standing in the kitchen doorframe.

For some reason the sight of her, of Nessie's mother scared the crap out of me. "Oh, Bella; hey." I said swallowing hard.

Bella stared at me for a few minutes before setting down a mug that I hadn't noticed before and walked up to me. "Jacob Black, I can think of a few very good reasons to kick your butt right now. The main one is that my daughter is crying her heart out right now, and it's because of you." She said glaring me down. Her words hit me hard. "I'm not saying that you meant to or even knew that you were doing it; but you did it all the same. You need to make it better." She said and sighed. "I was okay with letting you two find your own way like Edward said, but things change when my baby starts getting hurt."

Even as her words slapped me in the face, all I could think about was getting past Bella so I could talk with Nessie. To straighten things out. "Bells I know!" I said in as soft a voice as she was using. "I know I screwed things up. I may not be sure how, but I'll do anything to fix this. So if you wouldn't mind I would really, _really,_ like to talk with Nessie." I said in a hurry.

Bella stared at me for another moment before I saw her angry frown turn into a smirk. "Well it's about time." She mumbled before she retrieved her white mug and headed for the hallway. "Just give me another moment with Nessie then you can kick me out." She said, even quieter than before over her shoulder before she disappeared around the corner.

My hope rose a little more as I counted up to 60 in my head. Bella believed that Nessie loved me too! That was defiantly a good sign. I forced myself to count slowly; concentrating fully on this hard task, since my mind kept skipping numbers, trying it's hardest to get me into Nessie's presence. But I would give Bella what she asked for; because everything she had said earlier was true. She did have every right to beat me into a living pulp. Though I wouldn't give her a second more than what she asked for. I wasn't _that_ nice of a guy.

So when I reached 59, knowing it would take me exactly one second to reach her room, I ran the eight steps to Nessie's door and gently opened it.

"Renesmee!" I called out without thinking. Two similar faces turned to me, but I only really noticed one of them. My heart broke all over again as I looked into Nessie's puffy red eyes; making it painfully obvious that she had indeed been crying. Her hair was in small little ringlet hanging around her face and down her back, she looked like a broken angel.

I hardly noticed as Bella slipped off the bed she and Nessie had been sitting on and made her exit out the back glass door; Nessie was taking away all my attention. But as soon as the door was closed and Bella was gone I realized that we were alone. The thought suddenly seem frightening. I tried to slow down my rapid breathing; I needed to keep my head through this conversation.

"Nessie; I need to tell you something." I said, hoping she couldn't hear that my voice what shaking. Nessie's face didn't change when I said the words, and I wasn't sure if she heard me. Feeling very uncertain I waited to see if she would respond, which she did, after a moment. Her nod seemed to give me a little courage. So swallowing I spoke again, this time my voice a little steadier.

"Renesmee, I don't know how to say this. Really, it shouldn't be that hard; I don't know why I'm having such a hard time. No, no that's not true." I mentally hit myself over the head; I was babbling. And here I thought I might be able to get this out without sounding like an idiot. I took a deep breath and tried again; searching for the right words as I went. "Nessie, you are so important to me. You just can't understand what all you mean to me. Ness, you are more than just my imprint. I don't think there are words to tell you all that you mean to me. And maybe that's why this is so hard to say." I paused, how was I supposed to say this? How did I tell her how she made me feel? How she completed me.

As I searched for the right words I saw something flicker across Nessie's face before she sprung moved from the bed; stopping in front of me.

"Wait! You can't go!" She said looking up at me with a panic I had never seen her show before. "Jake you can't leave me! I promise never to talk about it never again! Please Jacob!" I watched in confusion as tears stared to fall down Nessie's face. I tried to find what I had said to make her react the way she was, but came up with nothing. "Jake I need you! You promised me! You said we would always be friends! Jake, I swear that I will never ask for more than that from you ever again!" What?

"Jake, I can't do this without you! I couldn't survive without you. Please don't leave me." She finished close to a whisper.

Wait, she thought I was leaving? Why would she think that? Nessie's words, hurt, confused and made me even more hopeful. I knew that was a dangerous thing to let happen, but I couldn't help it. I looked down at this half vampire that I had fallen in love with and suddenly words were coming out of my mouth. "Nessie, I'm not leaving you." I smiled a little at the insane thought. How could I ever leave her? This wasn't the first time that she had thought this either; I was going to have to do something to reassure her once and for all.

"I'm in love with you."

Nessie's facial expression didn't change as she nodded her head, like I had just asked her if she wanted something to drink. I was starting to wonder if she had heard me right when Nessie's eyes grew wide. "What?" Her voice barely hearable.

I nodded, I wanted her to know she hadn't heard me wrong. "Nessie, I love you." I said and saw her eyes grow even wider.

"No."

Not the reaction I was expecting. "No!" She said again, her voice growing louder. "You don't! You told me you just wanted to be my friend! You said we had different feelings for each other!" She yelled; I could see tears starting to form in her eyes.

I winced at the memory, it was true, but something else was making my heart beat speed up. She had said she thought we had different feelings…that meant one thing. I nodded feeling as though I might explode in a moment from excitement. "And you said that we had different wants. You told me you wanted things to go back to the way they were."

Nessie stared at me, mouth hanging open. I could see her eyes starting to comprehend what was happening, but then a pained expression came over her. "Oh no!" She cried. "I'm dreaming aren't I?"

What? No! "No! Nessie this is real." I said trying to stay calm. I did not need her to starting thinking none of this was actually happening. It had taken everything in me to get us this far; and I still didn't have an answer from her! I had to know.

Deciding to take a little leap, a dare on fate, I stepped forward, now only a foot apart I reached out to take her small delicate hand in mine, somehow making my large hand feel whole. My other hand went to her face and I cupped her slightly wet cheek, my fingers in her silk like hair. Feeling her skin on my fingertips made it hard to concentrate, but I needed her to know, without any doubt that I loved her more than the air I was breathing at this moment. Whatever happened after that was up to her.

"Renesmee," I said slowly, savoring her name on my tongue. "I'm not leaving you. And I swear nothing I have ever said to you before is more truth than this: I love you."

Time stopped. Everything froze, in that instance the only things that were there, the only things that mattered where us. Nessie stared up at me with eyes, bright with tears, her cheeks pink from crying, her heart fluttering faster than I had ever heard before. I loved her, and no matter what happened next I would always be by her side.

A tear leaked out of the corner of her eye, but I wiped it away with my thumb. "Please don't cry anymore." I whispered, closing my eyes for a moment. "It hurts to see you cry."

"Jake," Nessie's voice forced me to open my eyes. She was looking at me with disbelief and wonder. "I'm not dreaming." She said; it wasn't a question. More a state of fact that she was having a hard time getting her mind around. "You love me?" She asked in awe. I nodded, deciding it was probably best that I kept silent. "Then what the heck are you doing with Miley?" She asked in confusion, her eyes showing more than a little hostility.

I hadn't expected that. I tell her I love her and she demands to know about another girl. Sighing I moved my hand away from her face, though I didn't let go of her hand. This was going to take a lot to explain. "I was trying to make you think that I was over you. You said you wanted things to go back to the way they were; I thought you knew I loved you already and were rejecting me. So I asked Miley to go out with me thinking that if you saw us together you think I had moved on and then we could go back to being friends."

Nessie nodded, her eyebrows coming together; but she stayed silent. She didn't seem to notice I was on pins and needles, waiting for her to contradict what I had thought her feelings were for me. I wasn't even sure what I thought anymore, but the one with all the answers wasn't giving me any.

I could still see the tears lurking just behind Nessie's eyes as she stared off into nothing. Doubt started to override the hope that had been bubbling up moments before. Why wasn't she saying anything? Was she trying to figure out the best way to let me down?

Starting to panic I blurted out. "Nessie, I know this isn't the best timing, there probably isn't a good timing, I just needed you to know that I'm in love with you." I said in a rush. "If you still want to be just friends, then I will respect your wishes, I just needed you to know how I really felt." My heart pounded in my chest as I waited for Nessie's reply.

Nessie looked up at me with a concentrating expression, her eyes locked on mine. Even in my shocked and anticipating state I still was able to admire her beauty. I wasn't even sure how; I was so wound up, waiting for her to say something, I wasn't sure how my mind could function enough to recognize her beauty. But I did.

We stared into each other's eyes for an endless moment, before Nessie finally spoke.

"Jake, I have imagined this moment a thousand times; I have dreamed it in a million different scenarios; but I don't think any of them played out as this one is." She said, still keeping her eyes locked with mine. "But I also think this is the best one out of all the ones that I dreamed up;" She said, taking my other hand into her own; causing my heart to speed up. "because this one is real." She whispered.

I swallowed past the lump in my throat as her words hung in the air. "Jacob Black, I love you." She said slowly, her eyes still shining brightly, but now not with tears.

My breath caught in my throat. She had said it. She just told me she loved me! I tried to catch my breath. "Are you serious?" I gasped out, wanting to hit myself on the forehead as soon as the words came out. Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

Nessie smiled, giggling a little and nodded her head.

Something inside me burst. I closed my eyes as the feeling shook me. The warm feelings I got when ever close to Nessie, every tingle that I had ever received when holding Nessie's hand, every skipped heart beat, seemed to overwhelm me. My heart pounded in my chest, suddenly with new purpose, my mind seemed to open up with new ideas; everything in me suddenly seemed to be…right. The piece that I had been missing in my chest was suddenly there. I breathed in a huge breath, the air full of Nessie's scent and I sighed in complete enjoyment.

Slowly opening my eyes I looked around with a new sight. Everything seemed a little brighter; I wasn't sure how to describe it. It was like I had been living in a darken room with only a nightlight on, but I hadn't noticed that anything was odd about the little light; it was just what I had grown to use. But now, it was like someone had flipped on the light switch turning the overhead light on; letting me see things I had never noticed before, or seen with the clarity that I now had. The feeling was so great, my knees buckled under me, knocking me down into a kneeling position.

I looked up at Nessie, and I didn't even try to hide my wide smile. Nessie looked down at me with confusion and worry. "Jake are you okay?" She asked, putting a small hand on my shoulder, which she could not have reached if I had been standing up.

I nodded, still smiling. "Nessie, I've never been better." I said with a laugh. "If my legs were working right now I would be jumping up and down like a little boy on Christmas morning." I said shaking my head in complete wonderment. "You love me." I reached up and cupped Nessie's cheek once again, loving the feel of her soft skin under my palm. "I just can't believe you love me." I whispered in awe.

Nessie had a small smile on her lips and she nodded. We stayed like this for a while; I don't even pretend to care about how long it was. It could have been three years and I wouldn't have minded, as long as Nessie was with me. But after a while I finally found my voice again; but what came out I had no control over.

"Nessie, can I hold you?" I asked looking up into her eyes. I think we were both surprised at my words; but I realized that's what I wanted. "Can I just hold you for a while? To let myself know this is real." I blurted out my thoughts, before they had even completely formed in my own head.

Nessie seemed to freeze for a second before she slowly lowered herself to her knees in front of me. Taking that as a yes, I moved to a sitting position, leaning against the side of her bed, my legs crossed Indian style, and pulled her onto my legs. My body seemed to have a mind of its own, since my brain didn't seem to be functioning properly at the moment, and moved on its own accord. As soon as Nessie was settled into my lap, I wrapped my arms around her waist, holding her closely to me. Her closeness brought on the warmth feeling that was blazing in my chest to a new level and somehow made me feel as though I had finally found that vital part of me that I had been missing.

I was home.

Edward's POV

I am like most parents in many aspects. Like most fathers, I love my daughter more than anything, except maybe my wife. I would do anything for her. I can remember on many occasions when my daughter had somehow managed to get me to do something I would have never done, if it wasn't for the fact that she had asked. Many of the things that she asked had given my brothers more than enough things to laugh about for the rest of eternity.

I would also find myself spending hours, wondering if I was doing the right things for her. If some of the choices I had made had been the right ones, in concern to her. Would she have been happier if I had stayed home from school, instead of leaving her alone in the house with only Jacob Black for the past seven years? Had it been right of me to keep her cooped up in the house, never allowing her to go out with other people? Yes, I had made this decision for fear of people asking too many questions about her, and us, but was it still right for me to cut off the many opportunities I had by cutting off the outside world from her? She hadn't gotten the chance to meet any people her own age, even though she was never the same age for long. She had never gotten to interact with humans, or anyone outside our family, besides the Tanya Clan. Many of the choices that I had made, I worried about for hours on end; wondering if I had chosen the right, best, things for my daughter.

But unlike most fathers, instead of getting the chance to watch my daughter grow up for eighteen to twenty years before going off into the world; instead of getting years and years with my daughter complete dependent on me, always turning to me when she needed something or someone to talk to. Unlike most fathers who got this time with their daughters, my time with Renesmee was cut in half. I was only given seven years to watch my child grow up into the woman she was today.

And though I cherished those seven years more than any other time in my life, I sometimes found myself wishing for more of it. Wishing I could have spent more than just a couple of days before my baby girl was walking on her own, more than a couple weeks before she was off playing football in the front yard with the rest of the boys. But I wasn't given that opportunity.

My time was also split in half between Jacob. Between having to go to another school, the family and Jacob, I felt as though my time with Nessie had been far too short. Though I did understand how important Jacob was in Renesmee's life; I couldn't help but feel a certain kind of anger towards the man. In more ways than one Jake had stolen my daughter from me, even in the first years of her life.

It had been hard, watching as Renesmee grew and she started running to Jacob instead of me. I hurt watching Renesmee pick another boy over me; to see them get closer and closer; inseparable by the time that she could looked about three. I had known since the beginning what was to come, when Renesmee was older. It was quite obvious, even when she was only a small girl.

But that didn't mean that seeing it unfold didn't hurt.

I stopped my walking, the cool waves barely touching my feet. I had been walking, making my way around the island since I had found and talked to Jacob about ten minutes ago. I looked out over the dark water, the sun having set just a while ago. Because of my vampire vision I could still see far out over the clear water. I breathed in a deep breath of salty air. Confronting Jacob had brought up all these emotions and questions that I usually tried to keep inside where I wouldn't have to look at them. I didn't like the fact that I wasn't the number 1 man in my daughter's life.

Maybe that was the reason I made the decision to not say anything to either Renesmee or Jacob about what was blatantly obvious to everyone else in the family. I knew it was selfish of me; my only reasoning behind the decision was that I might get a little more time with my daughter before she became Jacob's.

Sighing I continued my walk, I was in sight of the house now and my thoughts kept going.

That had been one of the worst decisions I had made in concerning my daughter. I had not been thinking about her well being or happiness, only about my wants. And I had been stubborn, even when Bella and everyone else in the family tried to bring up the issue with me; trying to talk some sense to me. Even when I could see that my idiotic choice was causing unnecessary hurt and confusion. All I had thought about was getting more time with Renesmee.

But even my stubbornness couldn't hold when I had heard my daughter's thoughts this evening for the first time since she had inherited her mother's ability. I have never in my life heard something so painful or haunting to my own mind. Not even those people I had killed when I had gone through my rebellious stage haunted me the way this did. Hearing Renesmee, my baby girl, crying out in pure anguish, it had broken my heart into a million pieces. Then I had been running, running faster than I ever had before. My feet blurring into nothingness even to my own eyes. When I had finally found Renesmee lying on the ground, curled into a little ball and shaking, I knew what I had to do.

I was pulled out of my thoughts when I looked up and realized that I was standing right in front of the house, the glass back wall facing me. My eyes latched onto the only lighten bedroom on this side of the house. I could clearly see Renesmee and Jacob, he on his knees, a smile, filled with joy and disbelief, holding Renesmee's hand; who was standing in front of him. I had a feeling if it was possible my eyes would be fighting tears right now.

Sighing again, I fell to my butt and ran a hand through my hair. I watched as both of the figures in front of me moved together, Renesmee carefully sitting down onto Jacob's lap and Jacob wrapping his arms around her waist. I closed my eyes. Seeing the first scene of this new chapter in my daughter's life starting to unfold, I felt as though something was also coming to an end; something I wasn't sure if I was ready to end.

I sat like this for a few minutes before I took in a deep breath and was greeted with the very familiar floral scent. I opened my eyes and saw my Bella standing a foot in front of me.

"How you holding up?" She asked softly; making her way around behind me. I heard her fall to her knees behind me and felt a pair of slender arms wrap themselves around my neck.

I shrugged. "I feel like I have been ripped off." I told her truthfully.

I heard Bella sigh. "I think every father feels that way when watching his daughter with another man." She said with a small laugh. I knew I shouldn't have been surprised at how Bella knew exactly what I was talking about. She really was something else; it still amazed me how well she understood me.

I felt Bella lean closer into my back as she kissed my neck and I leaned into her soft lips. "You know," She murmured against my neck. "you are a really great man, and an amazing father."

Sighing I leaned back into Bella. "I don't know about that; I'm afraid I really messed up this time." I drew in a deep breath. "I shouldn't have insisted on not interfering with them."

Bella rested her head next to mine, on top my shoulder. "Yeah, that may not have been your best idea ever." She said softly. "But you made it right. In the end, you did the right thing."

I looked back up at the couple in the room in front of me. Renesmee was snuggled into Jacob's arms, her head laid on his shoulder and his head resting on top of her head. Sighing once more I closed my eyes again; looking past the hurt that the decision brought, I knew that I had made the right one. My little girl that was sitting in front of me, happy and with the man she loved, was proof of that.

I turned my head enough to kiss my wife on the side of the forehead. "Thank you for putting up with me." I said softly, inhaling another deep breath of her scent.

We stayed like this for a long time, neither of us having any desire to be anywhere else but right where we were. As we sat there I comforted myself with this knowledge:

_At least I know I have made at least one right decision for my baby girl._

_

* * *

_

**Hey everyone! Yeah I know it's been a long time, and I am truely sorry about that! My life has been pretty nuts lately and I was having a hard time writing this chapter. I don't really know why, this is kind of the chapter I have been looking forward to writing since I started to writing this story. But anywho, just to let everyone know I am not planning on doing Edward's POV again, I just thought it was kind of needed in this chapter. But it will be going back to just Nessie's and Jake's POVs from now on.**

**I would also like to thank everyone who has ever reviewed my story, and a special thanks to luv2beloved who was the one to knock the number over 100! So thank you all! You guys are awesome!**

**And a BIG thanks has to go to, ThatTeamJacobGirl, who reviewed almost a whole month after my last update and was the one who gave me the little nudge I needed to kick start me writing this chapter! So you all should be thanking her!**

**Well I think that is about it.....yep! Oh wait! I almost forgot, EVERYONE PLEASE REVIEW! Okay, now that's everything! :) God Bless!**

**Vinetta-Venture**


	23. Chapter 23 Stupid Questions

**Chapter 23 – New Feelings and Awkward Moments**

**Jacob's POV**

I yawned and rolled over on the bed. I wearily opened my eyes and looked at the clock that was hanging on the wall, 5:14am. My heart did a flip when I saw the time and it took me a few seconds to know why.

It was morning. I could go see Nessie again!

I jumped out of the bed and ran for the bathroom, stubbing my toe along the way; last night's events replaying in my mind. My breathing hitched as I remembered how we had sat together for two hours on the floor at the end of her bed, barely saying anything at all as we held each other. I remembered the way her skin felt from when I had ran my fingers lightly over her shoulders, arms, and face. I could remember how I had been afraid to touch her at first, as though if I did she would disappear and I would suddenly wake up, realize it was all just a dream, then be back in reality where Nessie didn't tell me she loved me. But after swallowing hard I had finally managed to skim my fingers over the delicate skin under her eye and she didn't shatter or disappear at my finger tips. She stayed, sitting on my lap and leaned into my touch. From that point on my fingers never left her skin; still some part of me, still fearing that it was all a dream. But when I touched her like this; even though I have been touching her arms and face since before she was able to walk; now it was different. I felt an electric pulse zing up through my arm with a single brush of skin on skin. It was a feeling so amazing, I knew I couldn't dream it up in my most perfect dream. So I kept touching her, kept feeling that zing; knowing for certain that it wasn't a dream. Knowing that this was indeed very real.

I could almost feel it now; just thinking about her and the time that we shared last night, made my insides go crazy and my heart speed up. I couldn't wait to see her again.

So as quickly as possible I took a shower, threw on a pair of cut offs and a dark green t-shirt. I walked quickly from the bathroom, throwing my dirty clothes in my room as I passed by it's open door, and headed right for Nessie's room. But when I reached it, I paused. I could tell by Nessie's steady heartbeat that she was still sound to sleep, probably wouldn't wake up for another four or five hours. Which was fine with me. I loved watching her sleep; and her dreams. But still I pause.

I couldn't quite explain it. Nessie was only parted from me by this thin wooden slate, by this small obstacle. Something I could so easily remove. My hand shook as I brought it up to the doorknob. I wanted to see Nessie so badly it hurt, but I was also very hesitant; A lot could happen in one night. How would she be feeling now that it was morning? I knew that Nessie wasn't one to change her mind like most girls her age do; Nessie wasn't fickle. My Renesmee knew what she wanted and went out and got it.

But my hand still shook as I grabbed hold of the doorknob and pushed the door open. My heart stopped beating for ten seconds after I opened the door. All that hesitancy fled me the moment I saw her. Nessie was lying on her side, under only the sheet that was bundled about her waist, leaving her upper half for me to see. She was wearing a white silk night dress with very thin straps on her shoulders; it was very fine looking and had a deep V in the front and a matching one in the back. Her hair was spilling over the pillow that her head was resting on and the one next to it, in large waves. She looked like a sleeping angel.

For some time I just stood there in the doorway, watching her as she slept, as she breathed in and out slowly. After a while I decided to move closer; I was very conscious of my movements, making sure that I didn't wake her. It was much too early for me to actually wake her.

So, slowly, I made my way into the room. With each step, I could see Nessie even better, could breath in her scent even more, and her fluttering heart beat grew louder in my ears. When I reached the side of the bed I kneeled down, I lightly laid my chin onto the mattress, so that my head was next to Nessie's. I looked over her peaceful face, the light purple tint that touched her eyelids, her smiling mouth. My fingers itched to touch the tender skin under her eyes, but I was afraid I might wake her; so I held myself back.

I was very content to just sit there and watch Nessie until she woke up; but then I thought of something I would like to do even more than that. Something I hadn't done in such a long time. Smiling to myself, I slipped my hand into Nessie's, closing my eyes as I did so.

_We were sitting on top of the bleachers at the school's stadium again. Nessie had her legs dangling over the back of the stone wall and was looking down._

_Jake stood, leaning against the wall, facing to the other direction with his arms crossed over his chest. "I'm really sorry Nessie. I didn't mean to get you confused or anything. I should have been clearer of my feelings." Jake said, a sad look on his face._

_Nessie sniffled and ran a hand roughly through her hair, brushing it away from her face. "Oh; well, I'm sorry too. I guess I just wanted it so bad that I read into things that you were saying and making them mean what I wanted them to mean. I should have realized that I was being silly to think that you would love me." _

Wait what? Why would Nessie be dreaming of something like this?

"_But I do love you Ness." Jake said earnestly, putting a hand on my shoulder blade._

_Nessie finally looked up to the Jake. Her eyes were rimmed red, probably from holding back the river that was trying to stream down her face. "Jake, you know it's not the same thing; not at all. And you know it." Nessie whispered, before turning and hopping off the wall._

_Nessie ran away from the stadium and then she was running through a forest. She kept running, tears falling down her cheeks. She ran for so long Nessie soon got lost and found herself turning around and around. Nessie screamed out, but no one was there to hear her. She was alone. And it was all her fault._

Finally I jerked my hand back, unable to see the images any longer. I put my hands firmly on Nessie's shoulders and shook her gently 'til she woke with a start; her eyes dark brown.

"It's ok." I said softly as Nessie whirled around on the bed, her head whipping back and forth, sending her hair in every direction. "It was just a dream." I said, moving swiftly to sit beside her on the bed.

Nessie's eyes locked on my face when I was seated and she took in a deep breath. I watched as she calmed herself and shoved her hair back out of her face with her hands; revealing a pale face. Well, paler than normal.

"You okay?" I asked. I hadn't expected that kind of reaction when I woke her up. It took me by surprise and I wasn't really sure what to do. Her eyes reminded me of a deer trapped in the head lights of a car.

She nodded her head and sighed heavily. "Yeah; I just didn't sleep well." She mumbled; dragging her hands through her hair again.

I knew that already; I had known she hadn't been sleeping well for a long while now. I just hadn't realized why. "Why?" I asked; almost afraid to hear the answer.

Nessie stared down at her hands that were now playing with the quilt that covered the top of her bed. She shrugged, still not looking up.

I sighed to myself; I really didn't like it when she didn't tell me things. "Ness," Putting my hand under her chin I lifted her face so that I could look her in the eyes. She looked so fragile. "what was your dream about?" I asked gently but firmly. We were past keeping things from each other. I mean look where it had landed us before. I also needed to know if this was really my fault. If I was the one causing her to lose sleep then I was the one who had to do something to fix it.

Sucking in a deep breath Nessie said. "I dreamed that we were back at school and I told you that I loved you." She swallowed loudly; making me reach out and take her hand. "But you told me that you didn't feel the same. You said that I had read into things that weren't there; you apologized."

I let her words sink in. So she was dreaming that I had turned down her love. "Nessie, it was just a dream." I said softly.

Nessie looked back down at the quilt and began to draw aimless patterns on the fabric. "I know. It just shook me a little, you know? I mean, that is, well was, my biggest fear up until a couple hours ago." She said softly.

I nodded. "But that fear is gone now; right?"

She paused. "I honestly don't know how to explain this. I know that you love me." She drew in a deep breath and looked up into my eyes, catching me in a way that I was sure that I would never be able to look away until she released me. I felt her small hand reach up and stroke my face and I couldn't help but lean into the touch. "But somewhere in my head I am still afraid. I don't know how I can be afraid anymore, but I just am." Her hand fell to her side and all I could think about was a way to get it back to my face. "I think it might just be fear of losing you in any way at all. I just love you so much, I don't know what I would do if you went away." She said with a sigh and looked back down again; releasing me from the hold she had on me.

I felt a sort of elation from her words. She really loved me. But at the same time I knew I needed to help Nessie get over this fear.

"Nessie, you aren't going to lose me." I told her gently. "In fact I am planning on never leaving you alone ever again. Trust me, soon you'll be begging me to leave." I said, hoping that I might get a smile out of her.

The corners of Nessie's mouth turned upward. She looked down at our hands. "Oh, I don't know about that." She said, her voice teasing. "I think I could get used to you with me all the time."

My heart pounded at the thought. "It's settled then!" I said happily. I quickly got to my feet, pulling Nessie to a standing position on the bed. With the bed's height, Nessie was only a couple of inches shorter than me. She looked up at me in surprise. Feeling impulsive I slowly wrapped my arms around Nessie's waist; watching her face as I did so. "Nessie, I love you." I stated. "I love you more than anything in this world. And I promise to never leave you. Ever." I said, staring deeply into her eyes. I saw her give the smallest nod and her eyes confirmed that she believed me.

/

Renesmee's POV

I looked up at Jake in surprise. I was almost eye level with the bed under my feet. It was odd not having to look up so much to see his face. But he was also a lot closer and I liked that. Jake's eyes were soft and his face loving. I saw a question cross his eyes, a second before his arms started to encircle me into an embrace. His eyes never left mine as his arms tightened a little, as if he was searching for any protest I might have of him holding me. I almost laughed at the thought and made sure to keep my face light. I had no issue being in his arms.

"Nessie, I love you." Jake stated softly. I loved hearing him say that to me. "I love you more than anything in this world. And I promise to never leave you. Ever." He said, staring deeply into my eyes, seeing into my being.

He really did love me.

"Well, never to leave you, until you go the bathroom that is." Jake said with a smirk.

I laughed, feeling the weight of last night's dream fall away from my chest. I thought about wrapping my arms around Jake's neck and resting my head against his, but I didn't. Was that too much too soon? What was I allowed to do? What was okay and acceptable? Suddenly I realized I had no idea.

So instead I kept my hands to myself and said, "I love you so much." My voice coming out as a whisper.

Jake didn't seem to have the same dilemma as me and continued to hold me close for a while; not that I minded. I savored the feel of his large arms around my waist, the warmth of his breath on my neck, his wet hair that tickled my face. But after some time, my eyes grew tired.

"What time is it?" I asked, pulling back a little to look Jake in the face.

He thought about it for a moment. "About 5:30."

"In the morning?" No wonder I felt like I was about to fall asleep standing here.

Jake smirked. "Yeah," He looked down, he looked a little pink in the face. "I didn't mean to wake you up. I, uh, I just wanted to see you." He mumbled.

I felt a blush rise to my cheeks and a smile take over my face. "Really?" I asked. "You just wanted to see me?"

He looked up slowly and nodded.

He was so cute! I thought. I had never seen him like this. He seemed to have no idea what to do with himself. He looked so shy and reminded me of a little boy talking to his first crush. It was almost weird seeing someone I knew to be so outgoing and more than willing to take chances being so self-conscious.

I tried to bite back a little on my amused smile as I lifted my hand to Jake's cheek. I gently pulled his face up and looked him in the eyes. His brown eyes were dark and shown with uncertainty. "I love you." I said softly. I knew I had just told him this, but I couldn't seem to think of anything else. I just had to make him understand, I loved him more than anything I had ever known. More than mom and dad. More than anything. It almost scared me how deep this feeling was. How could I possibly feel something so huge. Yet somehow, I do. And it was for Jake.

Jake smiled. "I know that now." I said his smile widening. "I love you too. And I plan on telling you that every single day for the rest of our lives."

I smiled at the thought. We had the rest of our lives. Together. I liked the sound of that.

But my eyes were still feeling heavy. "Jake, I'm glad you're here and everything, but I am about to fall asleep here." I told him.

Jake's eyes widened a little. "I'm sorry!" He stepped away from the bed; holding me at arm's length. "Here, I'll leave and you go back to bed."

I nodded. Jake gave me a small smile and stroked my cheek lightly. "Sweet dreams." He said before disappearing from the room.

I sighed and snuggled onto the bed, savoring the warmth Jake's hand had left on my face. My thoughts swirled with happiness. I didn't know it was possible to be this happy.

I smiled and snuggled back into the bed and pulled the covers over myself.

I was half asleep when I started to enter the dream again. When I started to see Jake rejecting me all over again. I jerked myself out of the unconsciousness that was trying to take me and flew into a sitting position. I took in a couple deep breaths.

Jacob loves me.

Jacob loves me.

I repeated this over and over again in my head while throwing the covers off me and climbing out of the bed. I couldn't let myself sleep if I was going to be dreaming like that. I stood next to my bed, biting my thumb nail. Why couldn't I sleep? Why was this dream still haunting me? I had been having these kind of dreams, of rejection and of Jake leaving me for a weeks. But now was different. Now Jake loved me. I knew that. So why couldn't I shake away this dream.

I stood on the balls of my feet, debating what to do. Then suddenly my body moved; knowing what it needed before my mind caught up to what was happening. I passed through my door and the hallway in less than a second. I knocked lightly on Jake's door twice before I could talk myself out of it.

I heard Jake move behind the door and watched it open.

"Nessie?"

I looked up at his confused eyes and gave a little shrug. "I can't sleep." I confessed; my brain still catching up to what I was doing.

Jake looked at me, his eyes growing sad. "Come on in." He said, opening his door wide to let me in.

I walked through the door and heard it click shut a moment later. I went and sat on the bed, holding my hands in my lap. When Jake sat down next to me, the mattress shifted to bare his weight and I found myself leaning into his shoulder. I felt a tingle at the touch. It was almost nerve wrecking to be so close to him. Every part of me was acutely aware that Jake right there! I kept my eyes down, trying to get me baring, but even down was a bad idea because his legs were there. I could only see from the knee down because that was where his cut off's ended. But even with only that much in sight I couldn't help but stare at the lean muscle of his calf. Goodness, did every part of him have to be so perfect!

"You look really tired." Jake said softly.

I blinked hard a few times and shrugged, thankful for the distraction. "I haven't been sleeping so well." I told him truthfully. I couldn't remember the last time I had a decent night's sleep. Well besides the time that I had fallen asleep with Jake.

I felt Jake move and as quick as a flash of lightning and as smooth as a piece of silk I was sitting comfortably in Jake's lap, leaning against his chest; while he was leaning against the headboard of his bed.

"Not that I am complaining or anything, but what are you doing?" I asked, slightly taken back by the new seating arrangement. Now even closer my body screamed in awareness. Good golly my body felt like it was about to combust from sheer giddiness!

"You need to sleep. So you do that and I'll keep the nightmares away." He said as though it was a perfectly logical answer.

I smiled up at him and tried to ignore the butterflies messing with the inside on my stomach. I ducked my head down and rested it against Jake's chest. I thought for sure that there was no way I was going to be able to fall asleep, not with my body acting the way it was. But soon Jake's soft steady heartbeat in my ear soothed me like a lullaby and I found my eyelids closing over my eyes.

I don't know how long I slept. I have a feeling it was for a very long time, because when I opened my eyes again I felt completely and totally rested. I went to stretch and realized I was trapped. I was not in the same position I had fallen asleep in. Instead of being in Jake's lap I was now lying next to him (who was now sleeping) on his bed with one of his arms under my head like a pillow and the other wrapped securely around my waist; keeping me firmly pressed against his chest.

I couldn't help but smile at our closeness and how truly safe I felt in his arms. I knew for sure nothing could ever hurt me here. His warmth surrounded me like a blanket, so much so that we didn't even need one. I looked up at his peaceful face and my heart hammered in my chest. He was truly beautiful. Was it weird for a man to be beautiful? My earlier butterflies that I thought had gone now came back. I loved being in Jake's arms, it like coming home after an awful day. But it was like my body didn't know what to do with this happiness! I snuggled closer into his embrace and buried my face in the soft fabric of his t-shirt. But at I lay there, the questions that had swirled around in my head came back: was this okay? It wasn't too much too soon? As I laid there, in Jake's arms, I still didn't have an answer. How was I supposed to know anyhow? I had never been in this kind of situation before. After a few minutes of constant questions and no answers I decided that I should just go make Jake breakfast. It was a win-win. I could surprise Jake with breakfast in bed and I could maybe think up some answers.

So slowly I tried to wiggle out of Jake's hold. Only the more I tried to move away the tighter his arm became around me, holding me fast to him. I stop squirming and looked back up to his face. Still in a deep sleep. I tried to slip out of his hold, but still he wouldn't let me go! Huffing a little I stared up at his peaceful face. I tried to think of my options, but there were really only two: wake him up or not and just not make breakfast.

I thought these two things over in my head before deciding I really did want to make him breakfast. So gently I started shaking him. "Jacob, wake up." I said rather softly. Nothing. Not even his facial expression changed! So giving up on gentleness I called in a loud voice. "Jake!"

/

Jacob's POV

"Jake!" I heard someone call out faintly. Who one earth would interrupt such a wonderful sleep? Why would anyone want to do that to me? I was perfectly content to just ignore the person when they yelled out again. "JACOB!" And this time I recognized the voice: Renesemee.

I opened my eyes and sure enough there she was! Her hair was a little messier than when I had been awake earlier. Her cheeks had a pretty pink tent to them and her eyes were sparkling. "Good morning beautiful." I said without a second thought.

Nessie's cheek grew slightly pinker and a shy smile lit up her face. "Good morning." She said rather softly. "What would you like for breakfast?"

I shook my head. "You don't have to make me breakfast! It's really o-"

But suddenly a fierce determined look took over her face. "No. I woke you up, just because I wanted to make you breakfast. Now I will make you breakfast whether you tell me what you want or not!" She said sitting up fast.

I couldn't help but smile. It seemed like forever since I saw this determination in her. Because of everything that had been happening over the last couple of weeks, we had just been sort of dancing around each other. Neither of us acting the way we normally would around each other. I sat up with her, kissed her forehead and sighed. "I love you so much." I said, laughing a little.

Nessie's face soften some and her cheeks grew pink again. "I love you too." She turned away and slid off the bed. She was still wearing that white gown and seeing the deep V, that showed off the perfectly smooth skin of her back made my mouth go dry. She turned back to me and my mouth went impossibly dryer at the V in the front. "Now are you going to tell me what you want to eat or am I just going to have to guess?"

I opened my mouth to reply but all that came out was a kind of strangled cough sound. Nessie raised an eyebrow at me. I coughed once and tried to swallow a couple times before trying again. "Waffles." And that was all I could get out.

Still with one eyebrow raised Nessie turned on her heel and headed out my door.

Once she was out of my room I fell back onto the bed, slamming my head onto the backboard on the way down. Smooth. Luckily I didn't put a hole in it. Groaning I rubbed my hands over my face. I really had to get a grip.

After a few minutes I got up and headed for the kitchen where I could already smell Nessie's cooking. When I got to the kitchen I could remember times before where I would just stand and watch her from a distance, always wanting to step closer always wanting to be closer, but always afraid to. But not now.

I walked up to Nessie, who had her back turned to me, while she was fiddling with something on the stove. I stepped up right behind her and slid my arms around her waist, pulling her close to me. She froze for a second before looking up at me over her shoulder.

"Hey."

I smile. "Hey."

We stared at each other for a minute before I noticed a cloud of steam growing thicker around the stove. "I think the waffles might be done."

Nessie blinked, looked confused and glanced back down at the waffle iron. "Oh crap!" She opened the waffle iron then quickly and smoothly pulled the waffles onto a plate. Seeing that they were a perfect gold color Nessie sighed in relief. She turned in my arms and handed the plate to me. "Here you go." She said, a triumphant smile on her face.

"Good morning love birds!"

Nessie and I turned surprised to see Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmet, Carlisle, Esme, Bella, and Edward standing in the doorway of the kitchen. Immediately I took a step away from Nessie. Somehow I had forgotten about the rest of the Cullens over the last day! Suddenly I wondered where they had all been over the last 24 hours.

Alice who had spoken stepped forward. "I am so glad you two finally got things fix!" She said throwing her arms around Nessie. "It was a LONG time coming!" I heard Emmet give a 'woot-woot' from the kitchen door. Alice then let go of Nessie and turned on me. "It sure took you long enough to get your acted together though! I was beginning to think that you never would! I mean after we flat out told you-"

I was standing there in a stunned silence, still wondering where the heck they had disappeared to when thankfully Jasper stepped forward and wrapped his arm around his wife. "Darling, even though I agree with you a hundred percent, can't we just celebrate that Jacob finally did get his act together in the end. I mean, this is a big day for them."

Alice seemed to think about this for a moment. "You're right."

Then Bella stepped up. She went up to her daughter and slid her arm around Nessie's waist. "Will you come take a walk down the beach with me?" She asked softly.

Nessie looked and met my eyes for a second and I shrugged. I had no idea what was going on.

So Nessie nodded and Bella led her away.

As soon as they were out of the house, I was starting to wondering if the rest of the family would start bombarding me with questions, which I was not looking forward to. But instead Edward, who looked more like Nessie's father than ever before, stepped forward. "Jacob, we need to talk."

Suddenly I was wishing for the stream of questions over whatever Edward could possibly have to say to me.

/

Renesmee's POV

I walked out of Jake's room and headed to the kitchen. My heart beat wildly as I pulled out everything I would need to make waffles. I felt like I was in some sort of dream. Everything felt surreal. Jake was in love with me. Did that mean we were a couple now? What happened now? What did we do next? How were we supposed to act around each other? We were supposed to do anything differently?

Question after question circled around in my head, none of which I had an answer. I had never been in love before. Never felt anything like this; what was I supposed to do with it! I kept pondering these questions, searching for answers as I started to throwing ingredients into a large bowl.

I was so focused on my thoughts and putting the mix into the waffle iron that I didn't notice someone was in the room with me until I felt warm hands slide across my body. My breath caught at the sudden contact and my heart skipped a couple beats. I felt Jake pull me close, my back flat against his chest. I looked up over my shoulder and into Jakes smiling face.

"Hey." Was what came out of my mouth, though I have no idea why!

Jake just grinned. "Hey."

I stared up into his brown eyes, they held nothing but love and adoration. How on earth did he know what to do? It was like he had the "100 ways to make girls swoon" guild and was using every one of them on me!

"I think the waffles might be done."

I blinked, what on earth was he talking about? Jake looked pointedly at something in front of me and I followed his gaze. "Oh crap!" I cried realizing I had completely forgot that I was cooking! Quickly I opened the waffle iron and pulled the waffles onto a plate, mentally hitting myself for forgetting the waffles. I inspected the waffles and was pleased and relieved to see that I hadn't ruined them. I turned in Jake's arms and handed the plate to him. "Here you go." I said, smiling rather brightly.

"Good morning love birds!" I heard someone say.

Jake and I both turned to see the whole family standing in the doorway of the kitchen. Immediately Jake dropped his arms from around my waist and took a step away and stuffing his hands into his pockets; while I just stood there feeling completely dumbfounded. Where the heck did they come from?

For some reason the sight of them was completely unexpected and it took me a moment to figure out why. I hadn't seen them in a while... did I see anyone besides dad, mom, and Jake yesterday? Where had everyone else been?

I barely noticed Alice as she stepped into the kitchen and started ranting. "I am so glad you to finally got things fix!" She said throwing her arms around me. "It was a long time coming!" She then let go of me and turned on Jake. "It sure took you long enough to get your acted together though! I was beginning to think that you never would! I mean after we flat out told you-"

I was about to jump in on Jake's defense, it wasn't his fault! If anything it was mine, but just at that moment Jasper stepped forward and wrapped his arm around his wife. "Darling, even though I agree with you a hundred percent, can't we just celebrate that Jacob finally did get his act together in the end. I mean, this is a big day for them."

Alice seemed to think about this for a moment. "You're right."

Jasper met my eyes and I gave him a nod of appreciation. Then mom came up next to me and wrapped her arm around my waist."Will you come take a walk down the beach with me?" She asked softly.

Still feeling rather shell shock from the sudden reappearance of everyone, I did the natural thing and turned to Jake, silently asking him if he had any idea what to do? Because at that moment, I had no idea what was going on. Jake just shrugged with a look that seemed to say he was thinking along the same lines that I was.

So I nodded and let mom lead me out of the house and out onto the warm sand of the beach. We walked for a minute or so and I was really beginning to worry that she was going to give me the sex talk or something when she surprised me be asking.

"Renesmee you have grown up so fast." She said with a sigh, looking out over the clear waters. "I was a lot like you in that way. I may not have grown physically fast, but emotionally and mature wise. I sometimes wondered if I missed out on a real childhood. When Charlie and mom separated I just felt like I had to take the place of the missing adult." She stopped walking and turned to me. "And now I don't want you to rush into adulthood. I know our situations are different, I just don't want one day for you too look back and wish you hadn't moved on so quickly. And don't take me wrong, I am not by any means saying that you should wait to start moving on with Jake. If anything you guys were moving too slowly! You two are meant to be together. I just don't want you to feel that you have to start taking huge leaps into this new relationship." She paused and ran her hand through your hair. "Remember you have all the time in the world. Don't feel rushed."

I stared at my mother; beautiful, calm, and nearly perfect in every way. It seemed weird to think about her in any other way. I had very rarely heard her talk about her childhood and I had never really asked. Never really even thought about it. But now I did. I pictured my mom, small and impressionable, watching her parents' marriage fall apart. I could see her doing the best a little kid could do to fill in the missing gap that was now in the family. It made me sad for her. Maybe she didn't have the normal childhood. I know I didn't. And it was heartwarming to know she didn't want me to miss out on anything. But she right was in the fact that we were different.

I smiled up at mom. "But I don't feel like I have missed out on anything!" I took her hand in mine and gave in a squeeze. "You and dad have given me everything I have ever wanted. I have never once felt jipped out of anything. And now I am ready to start moving forward."

As I said the words, they became more and more true to me. Maybe it was because everything had suddenly, maybe because this change was so huge my mind moved slowly to grasp it, or maybe it was the _way_ things had happened between Jake and I were such a shock that it had left me feeling a numb, but for whatever the reason, before that moment when I said the words out loud it didn't feel completely real. But now it all seemed to come back to reality. This was real. This was my life. And being with Jake was what I wanted to do with it.

Suddenly all those questions that were floating in my head earlier just seemed crazy and stupid. And I had the answer to all of them: Jake and I would figure it out. It wasn't something I needed to worry about. We would work it all out in time. And we did have all the time in the world.

/

Jacob's POV

I followed Edward out the front door of the house and onto the porch where he sat down on the steps. I stood a few steps away from him, feeling extremely nervous and not really sure if I should sit or stand. I slid my slightly sweaty hands into my pockets. This looked bad. Holding Nessie like that was not the way I wanted to tell Edward that I was now with his daughter. And I was pretty sure he was feeling the same way.

"Jacob you can sit. Please don't think I am about to interrogate you or something." Edward said, sounding very old and tired. This took me by surprise and I sat down a few feet away from him. He sighed before turning his eyes on me. "I just wanted to thank you. You have been a much better person than I have over the last couple of weeks. Through all this you kept Renesmee's best interest first. Even when it cost you great personal pain. And for that I have to thank you. I can't say the same things about myself." His gaze was steady on me.

I looked at him in surprise. "So this isn't you wanting to lay down the ground rules or something?"

Edward snorted. "No Jacob. Despite what you may think sometimes, I do trust you. I know you won't move to fast. I know you hold Renesmee with the respect and won't do anything that will hurt her in any way." He shook his head. "You know sometimes I think you just forget that I am a mind reader."

I gave a relieved laugh and relaxed some.

"But I should at least say once, if for no other reason just because it's my fatherly duty," Edward said all sarcasm gone from his face. "if you do ever hurt her, make no mistake, I will kill you."

I wasn't sure if I should laugh or not. I knew he was serious and grateful that he was. So instead I just nodded. He held my gaze for a second before turning to look off into the distance.

I followed his example and we both just sat on the front steps looking out at the path and the ocean beyond that. Edward didn't say anything else and I was okay with that. Instead I just thought of Nessie.

A few minutes later at the end of the path down on the beach Bella and Nessie came into view hand in hand. They started down the path while Edward and I watched as they got closer. Nessie was still wearing her peal white night gown and her hair was hanging around her face and shoulders, making me sure that she had just stepped out of heaven.

Both Edward and I stood when they reach us. Bella and Nessie shared a look between them before they let each other go, Belle going to Edward. Nessie followed her mother to her Edward, gave him a hug and kissed his cheek. They also shared a look, I couldn't help but wonder if she were talking to him through her thoughts, and then she turned from her father and came to stand next to me. I smiled down at her.

But then I remembered I had a question that I hadn't had a chance to ask yet. "Hey, where have you guys been?"

Bella gave a small laugh. "We thought you guys could use some privacy while you worked things out. We have been around, just out of sight, out of mind."

"Yes! But now we would very much like to talk to you about it all!" Alice yelled from somewhere in the house.

Nessie took my hand and smiled up at me. "Ready face the music?"

I gave her hand a squeeze. "Oh absolutely."

/

**Hey everyone! I know it has been a LOOOONNG time! I really wasn't sure if I was ever going to come back to this story; but then the other day I just felt like I HAD to. So I did! Anywho, I hope everyone likes this chapter! Let me know what you think! I love feedback! I hopefully will get another chapter up soon! Love ya! God Bless!**

**-Vinetta-Venture**


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